“We’ll have to end it soon.” JunHyung gazed at the ceiling meticulously as he focused on a crack. It seemed never ending; an infinite crack, always there. His breathing became ragged as he scattered his brain for the proper words to convey exactly what he was feeling; but it was easier said than done.

If it were up to him they’re relationship would be like the crack on the wall, never ending; always there.

“DooJoon…management…they all suspect something.” They weren’t allowed to date. Things always became messy and complicated when they were in relationships. Fans were lost and hearts were broken. To avoid a fiasco Cube Entertainment thought it best to have their idols loveless.

It seemed like an eternity passed before she broke the silence, “I understand.”

“Do you love me?” The rapper of Beast looked intently at the girl currently sitting next to him. He was nervous, scared, heartbroken, and hopeful all at once.

She pondered it for a moment, deciding what the right thing to say was.  “I only love you if you love me.” She finally replied. She smiled content with her given answer. JunHyung chuckled lightly, “What kind of answer is that?”

She shrugged, “Why does it have to be a one sided love affair? That hardly seems fair.” He mentally cringed at her last word.

Affair.

That was what the relationship was from the very beginning, a secret affair that no one could know about.  Before it could become official to the world they would have to end it.

He gently reached for her hand and pulled her up with him. The brown eyed rapper led them to his bedroom. They lay in the bed with his head on her stomach.

This was the last night they could lay together. Then what? Just because she was leaving his love life didn’t mean she would be out of his life completely. She was the employed at Cube after all.

His grip on her waist tightened when he imagined other men hitting on her. They would smile charmingly and coo at her soft beauty. She would look away shyly and begin to walk away, but turn to look at them one last time before she disappeared out of view. She would do the same thing she did with him, and he couldn’t do a thing about it.

“Will you love again?” He drew imaginary circles around her stomach.

“Love is unforeseen. I don’t know…but I’m still young. Maybe I will find a great love later in life. When I do, my head will spin and I’ll get dizzy from it.”

He grunted. “How can you speak of love so fluently when you’ll only love me if I love you?”

She held her breath momentarily. “I can do so, because after tonight I’m going to make sure I change my ways.”

JunHyung rested his chin on her stomach lightly, “What do you mean?”

“JunHyung! Hey! Snap out of it!”  KiKwang snapped his fingers in front of his friend’s face. He had been acting weird for a while now, always drifting off into space.

“Huh?” JunHyung lazily glanced over at the dancer. It had been 3 weeks since the separation and yet he couldn’t seem to get over it; over her.

“What’s up with you? You’ve been acting so strange.” He glared at JunHyung upon seeing him in deep thought once again.

“HEY! Are you even listening?” He reached for an ice cube and shoved it in the unsuspecting idol.

“Ah! That’s cold!” He held the ice cube in his hand.

 “Life is an instant moment, like ice in your hands. After tonight, I won’t bother with petty emotions if it isn’t real love.”

He watched the ice melt before his eyes. Looking sadly over at the worried man sitting in front of him, JunHyung softly spoke, “Have you ever loved someone?”

The singer was taken aback by the sudden question. “Me? Nah. I’m too proud for that sort of thing. Why?”

“No reason. Hey listen, I’ll meet you guys up later. I’m feeling really tired, so I’m just going to go lay down for a while.” KiKwang reached for JunHyung’s shoulder before he left. “If I did find someone worth loving, though, I wouldn’t let anything or anyone stand in my way. I would have my cake and eat it too.”

She walked aimlessly to her apartment; lost in deep thought.

When the relationship started she knew what she was getting herself into. An idol was never free to fully love. Sure, there were some who did have public relationships, but those relationships never lasted. So when JunHyung asked her to be his she knew it was temporary.

She was twisted enough to accept, because up until 3 weeks ago she had never fully loved anyone. There was never a time she could remember where she fantasized of a big wedding with a man who was incandescently in love with her. Nor did she ever imagine herself as a mother. All she wanted was to love for the moment.

The average human falls in love for a span of two years. Love is just a chemical imbalance that lasts up to two years.  What was to happen after those two years? They would grow apart as he went on more tours not bothering to see her, and she would live her life day to day without any remorse. So then what was the point of falling in love if it technically ended in two years?

No amount of love songs would ever bring back that feeling that shocked their bodies the first time they gazed upon each other; the first time they kissed, or made love countlessly and passionately.  This was the reason why she didn’t cry or beg him to stay when he left. She would rather have him leave her side while she was still in love to have a lasting impression of him. She wanted him etched in her memory forever.

Her thoughts were put to a halt upon bumping into someone. She looked up nonchalantly “JunHyung.” She breathed.

Rain began to pour down. She blinked several times to make sure she wasn’t seeing things. Lack of food usually caused hallucinations.

He stood there, inches from her, not entirely sure on what he should do first. One thing he was sure of was his love for her. He was going to fall in hopeless love with her without caring about the consequences.

The young rapper grabbed her lightly and pinned her against a desolate wall away from obscuring eyes.  Both breathed heavily as he molded himself against her body.

“I’ve decided not to care about the consequences. I want you. I want you entirely to myself.” He whispered darkly in her ear.

She felt shivers run down her spine at his bold confession. Was she to throw everything she just contemplated out the window?

“When I close my eyes all I see is you. I can’t possibly open them and keep you as a memory. I think you’re the one, or at least as close as I’ll ever get to it.  I love you and I will still love you even if you’ll only love me for a short time.”

She took a moment to find her voice before almost inaudibly speaking. “What made you come to this conclusion?”

He cupped her wet cheek, salty tears mixed in with fresh rain. “Someone once told me that life is an instant moment, like ice in your hands. The only way to go about making sure our love isn’t like that is to treat it like dry ice. Dry ice will never melt. Neither will my love for you.”

Author's Note:

Another one-shot! I hope you all enjoyed it! I'm honestly too lazy to come up with a long story. I get distracted easily, hence why I only do one-shots!

<3