Don't look at him, you tell yourself. Don't look at him like that.

 

Only recently had this become a problem. Before two weeks ago he was your friend, your best friend, but somewhere along the line something changed. Not in him, but in you. It's as if someone tied a string to your heart and pulled it, painfully squeezing it. It could burst at any moment, but you can't let that happen. 

 

It's everything he does, really, that makes the puppet master of your heart pull the strings tighter. It's the way he plays bass, fingers moving rapidly and eyes narrowed in concentration. It's the way he's passionate about everything he does, whether it's playing or helping out a friend. You look up to him, even if he is a silly weirdo sometimes with the mental age of six. 

 

He's always been affectionate, a person with no sense of personal space. The other members don't seem to mind, but it takes it's toll on you. It's like a personal battle; you try so hard not to put your arm around his waist, try so hard not to kiss those lips you dream about night after night. It's so hard, and you don't know how much longer you can last. 

 

There were so many oppurtunities to tell him. When he asks you, "What's wrong?" when you seem a little more jumpy around him than usual. What are you supposed to say? What's wrong? I'm completely utterly hopelessly in love with you. You're beautiful, the most beautiful person i've ever seen and you're always in my mind. When I hear a love song you always come to mind, when I see couples holding hands in the park I imagine it's you and me. Yeah, that's what's wrong. 

 

You can't do that. 

 

So you continue to be best friends, let him stay blissfully ignorant. It's what's best for now.