I know Yongguk's gay. It's not as if we haven't gone far with each other before. The broken stall in the boy's bathroom, an isolated room at a party, in the showers during a beach camp out; You name it, we've been there, and we've done more than our fair share of things. But I never really know what's going on inside Yongguk's head. It's always his decision; He'll decide when he wants to get it on with me, it's always if he's in the mood and if he's got the time. He's made it all too clear he doesn't want anything more from me than a few decent make out sessions, sometimes something more. He has an image to keep up, after all. A playboy can't be seen to be held down by one person, let alone a guy of all things possible. He's not looking to date. Never in a million years. It's as if we both have a silent, mutual agreement. He gets to use my body for his ual frustrations whilst I have the honour of being in his prescence, of being the one chosen to pleasure him. I dream of something more with Yongguk, beside the whole people-who-don't-really-know-each-other-and-aren't-exactly-associated-in-any-way with benefits thing. I can imagine snuggling close with him, relishing the warmth in his embrace. The only thing I believe Yongguk thinks of is his hands up my shirt and mine down his pants.

Charming.