Too Nice

Description

Because being rejected by Kim Joonmyun shouldn't hurt this much.

Foreword

 

It had been a fair enough warning—steer clear away from Joonmyun and avoid heartbreak. It sounded so simple back then, and it was, at first. We weren’t in the same social circle and we only had three classes together in a week. I thought I had it all figured out.
 
 
 
I had never been more wrong in my life.

 

 

 

A/N: Debut fic/drabble (like, finally!). Be nice.

 

 

Author's Thoughts
baerineul9095
Too Nice - I put a proper foreword. Will be adding the poster in a few moments.
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Comments

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Jaemaru09 #1
Chapter 1: So sad T.T
I know how it feels <//3
HearMeThroughMusic #2
Chapter 1: Sequel please?
KaedaBuwan #3
Omg please have a sequel! This was so amazing, please please! >. <
Farys_Sya #4
Chapter 1: ITS IS A REALY NICE STORY, IT SEEMS LIKE AN EXPERIENCE OR SOMETHING.........
thecafewriter #5
Hey, babe, I kinda agree with some of the comments on here (^^) this fic really does feel like a foreword or prologue chapter. You should consider elaborating on this plot line, it's really good! ;D
thecafewriter #6
Chapter 1: Heeeeey, honey ;) hehe well I took a break from my hiatus to finally check out your debut fic, and you did a really good job! (^^) You wrote a really clear piece of fiction. Your grammar wonderful and I was really impressed with how smoothly you transitioned and paced your story. Your narrator has a very clear voice and makes the story easy to understand.

As per critiques, I think you could have characterized Joonmyun a bit more. You described him as being handsome, sweet, polite, nice, and smart, but I think the story would have benefited more if you had shown Joonmyun being sweet and kind rather than just dictating him to be so. Like show vs. tell. Aside from letting her down gently, Joonmyun didn't do much in the fic.

Also, be aware of your tense. The fic was still pretty seamless, though, so the tense changes weren't all that noticeable and didn't detract from the overall story, but you should still watch out for it. And I actually really liked your ending (^^) It was open-ended, but in a way that leaves the ending open to interpretation and invites the readers to continue musing over it even after the story has ended.

Not much to say in the ways of spelling and grammar. You did very well on these two points and the story is really cohesive. Good job! <3 Now keep writing!
Chajiguk-suho #7
Chapter 1: I agree with LovelyBananaMilk.... stories like this must have a sequel.
And you really did a great job for a beginner, Unnie :D
LovelyBananaMilk #8
Chapter 1: Stories like this must always have a sequel! That was really noce ;u;
Ambriel #9
Whoa. I felt that. ouch xD
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