I’m Sanghyuk, the maknae of a rookie group called VIXX. I am also the one who has the least amount of experience and practice around the group, I always categorize myself as the main thing that holds the whole group down, and it’s because of my lack of experience which causes our practice to prolong in a very unwanted amount.

When MyDol started, I had experienced different kinds of feelings. Leo hyung made me really nervous and kept me awake almost every night after the mischievous thing that Ravi Hyung asked us. The feeling of our heads touching and palms on each other really made me uneasy in way that the image of Leo hyung keeps on appearing on my mind.

Then when the members of Vixx was finally finalized, something happened to me again. I was paired with a hyung that I’m very uncomfortable with (but no one can still beat the uncomfortable feeling when I’m with Leo hyung) It’s Hongbin hyung. When he tied our foot together I know myself that I can’t escape and should face him with all my might. When we settled down on a sandy ground, I initiated the conversation between the two of us. I voiced out all the uneasiness inside my heart, and when Hongbin hyung comforted me, I felt at ease instantly. I felt really warm and loved inside my heart, and after that I started to view Hongbin hyung in a very different shade of light, but Leo hyung keeps on bugging my heart.

My heart was tugged in two different opposite sides by Leo hyung and Hongbin hyung. But then a new emotion washed me when we came home from the cinemas. We all watched spider man, but on the way towards the cinemas, Ken hyung didn’t ride with us, he wanted to ride in a different car than us. It’s the first time I missed Ken hyung’s loudness. Whenever he talks in the camera with his voice as Kenjumma, I always finds myself laughing, smiling and happy. But when I stared at the empty seat in front of me, I can feel a patch of my heart longing for him, for his skinship and loudness.When the cinema ended we all came back home inside a single car. I saw myself smiling again because Kenjumma is back.

But despite all this confusing feelings inside me, there’s a certain someone that takes my attention completely. Whenever I’m with him I always forget the other things and other hyungs that keeps on confusing me. Whenever I’m longing for my family he’s always there to comfort me. He scolds me whenever I did something wrong in our practice but after that he’ll apologize to me and act cute in front of me. Whenever I’m near to him I always feel complete, not like when I’m with Leo hyung the feeling of warm was lost, when I’m with Hongbin hyung there’s warmth but then my heart don’t beat faster like how it does when I’m near Leo hyung, when I’m near Ken hyung the feeling of happiness and warm is present but then there’s something about hyung that makes me think of him as a friend and only friend.

But when I’m with the leader of Vixx, N-hyung or Hakyeon hyung my heart beats really fast, I always feel warm around him and I’m also all giddy and smiling.

“Yah Sanghyukkie, don’t doze off, look at the camera!” N hyung mumbled behind me which made me flinch a bit in my position. Then I just realized that N hyung’s arms are wrapped around me, I kept on tugging my hand away from him so that I can hide my feelings but he kept on wrapping it again. “Hyung don’t be all clingy…” I whispered softly, but of course I don’t really mean that, in fact I really like it when hyung clings on my arm all the time, I feel like I am a man and he’s a girl, maybe hyung is a bottom or uke like what I heard from fangirls and what I read from fanfics, am I a seme or top? I shook my head violently as erted thoughts washed the innocence away from my mind. I blushed really mad so lowered my head a bit. “Yah I told you look at the camera!” N hyung whispered to me. “N-neh…”

I looked up and saw him smiling again. His arms were tightly wrapped around mine, he moved closer to me and I can feel the warm on his body again. Despite hyung being all clingy, he’s my most favorite hyung inside Vixx … and I really really love my clingy N-hyung.

Just a short story about this gifs~~ xDDD