Click! 

He was brought to the older when he was 14, successfully being scrapped off of his identity of an orphan. Yet he wasn't the least glad.

(That was until he first set eyes on the older male.)

+

Chanhee has never worked well with pressure. He's 17 that year, and it wasn't a year he could fool around. It's no big deal they said, it'll only affect your entire life, they said. He had been preparing for the upcoming major national examination for the past 3 years (he was sure he only made use of half the time), and finally, it is going to take place soon. He was jaded, and tired of the constant encouragements (if he put it in a nice way), he knew the school only wanted them to do well. He knew and maybe that's why he's distraught, petrified of the untold future.

He reached home, chucked his bag on the forgotten teal-colored table, hurried into his room before letting his weight fall onto the bed. He was mentally exhausted. After mumbling a few incoherent words, he fell asleep.

What he didn't know was that in those 3 years, Byunghun had never forgotten to pick up things after him; arranging them orderly, had always remembered to shift Chanhee into a more comfortable position after he made sure the older male was asleep.

+

Chanhee was 20 when Byunghun was 17. They were bestfriends, ("Byunghun, I'm your first and last bestfriend, and so are you my first and last, alright?" He grinned, holding his pinky up. "Alright," the younger replied as he proceeded to hook his pinky to the other's.) having bonded over the past 4 years.

"Byunghun, why do you never fall in love?"

"Because you're enough?"

Chanhee chuckled when he heard the younger's standardized answer (he asked every year), because he knows it can't be true. And Byunghun returned a laugh too, because really, it can't be true.

For another 3 years of their lives, Lee Byunghun has never lied.

+

"It's so painful." They were lying on the couch, a little after 1 AM when Chanhee began speaking.

"What is?"

"Breathing."

Silence.

"Breathing. Oxygen is just like gasoline, isn't it?"

The other said nothing, positioned himself opposite his bestfriend, closing the distance between them. He slung an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close, pressing him close to his chest.

Less than a minute later, he could feel the older male trembling hard, his breathings uneven and rushed. He could feel tears soaking through his shirt, could hear the muffled sniffs of the other.

"Don't be afraid, I'm here. I'm here, and will always be." He gently rubbed the other's back, softly whispering words of comfort.

For another 2 years of their lives, Byunghun was always the stronger one.

+

Living, when you wanted least to.

The hurt, it is alive, it is suffocating. It is slick, sticky and attacks unknowingly. Its teeth bites and tears through your wounds, it hurts, and it hurts because it reminds you of the pain. The hurt is alive, it aggravates. It cuts off your air supply, yet disallows you to die. It suffocates, but doesn't kill you.

It hurts, but doesn't kill, because it doesn't kill what already is dead.

This must have been what the older male was feeling.

And if Byunghun pretended hard enough, maybe he could have convinced himself that his heart hadn't hurt every time the other had sobbed his eyes out, his perpetual tears holding every ounce of his unhappiness, his misery.

+

"Are you sure about this?" He questioned, a little skeptical about what they were planning to do next.

"Yes, Byunghun, I am. And yeah, it isn't like this was the 22nd time you have asked me the same question," the brunette scowled, before grinning at said person.

"Hey, I was just confirming alright. It seems like there's no way to change your mind." He smiled, playing with the other's sleeve.

"I was serious from the 1st time you asked. You don't have to do it if you don't want to, I can unders-"

"No, shut up. I will and that's final."

"Aww, isn't that lovely of my bestfriend."

"Yeah yeah," he rolled his eyes, but that small smile never left his face. "But..."

"But?"

"Can you... can you kiss me?"

"Really Byunghun, really?"

"Hey, don't misunderstand! I am just curious and I have never tried... ugh just ignore me and forget I said any-"

He never got to finish his sentence before lips met his, but he didn't minded any bit of it. The kiss was soft, wet and woah. Woah, because it was his first, and last.

The first and last Chanhee would always be.

"You know, Byunghun, thank you."

"Thank you? Why?"

"For these twelve years. For being there. I can't pay back all of that I've owed you in this life, but I probably will in my next life, so don't you dare forget me."

"I won't."

"That's good."

They climbed over the railings, the smiles never leaving their faces.

"Chanhee?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

"Hah, I love you too."

"Really?"

"Yes, really."

"That's good."

"Shall we do it now?"

The younger nodded, before the older male grabbed onto his hand, giving a gentle squeeze.

And they fell, letting gravity take over their bodies, before they hit the rough surface, with broken bones and hearts that doesn't beat until it hurt.

For twelve years, Lee Byunghun and Lee Chanhee never felt happier.

Hey! I'm back heehehehehehe typed this out last night when I had undone assignments lmao I have the most ideas when I'm busy TT School has been stressful, this year is no joke for us TT Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed this~ Thank you for reading! ♥