You came out of your bathroom, newly bathed and dressed. You jump to your bed like you always do on Saturday mornings. It was your day off from your everyday practice and you decided to just enjoy your time. You reached for the TV remote as you munch on an apple in your hand. As the television switched on you hear its audio.

“Annyeong Haseyo. Uri-neun Super Juni-oyo!” And as soon as the screen goes on, you see his face.

Your hand froze. You feel something stab you in the heart. Your eyes go wide as you see his face again, after three long years. The apple rolled off your hand at the same instant. Then, your brain suddenly plays back familiar painful sounds, hearing yourself shouting at him, and not long after a door slam. And then silence. It was the day you last saw him.

 

“Dongahe-yah! Donghae-yah!” you shook your boyfriend.

“Ne?” he said, groggily.

“Don’t you remember what day it is?” you asked him.

“Hmmm?” he looked away from the TV and cocked one eyebrow at you, his eyes, searching.

“It’s the 26^th,” you whispered softly, hoping your voice won’t break in sadness and disappointment.

“And?” he asked. You felt as if someone jabbed you in your chest.

“Nothing,” you murmured. The truth was, it wasn’t nothing. Today was your eleventh month anniversary together. You stood up from the couch and went up quietly to his room. You grabbed his Rubik’s cube and started disarranging it, keeping your mind busy.

You felt like crying, but you fought it off. Ever since his group released their first full album, he’s been really different. He comes over your apartment less often. He’s been really conscious of his appearance, though you have argued a lot of times that he’s perfect just the way he was. He’s been flirting with girls too, even with you around. But you tolerated all of these, knowing his life as an idol was hard. He was tired always, and you never failed to care of him.

You hear a soft knock on the door before it opened. “Are you okay?” he asked.

You didn’t look up nor stood up from lying down on his bed. You ignored him and his gorgeous face close to yours.

You hear him sigh. He grabbed the cube from your hand and looked directly in your eyes. “Want to go out?” he whispered.

You just can’t say no to him. You nodded your head slightly and he smiled a little. He got off the bed and helped you up too. “Let me just fix myself,” he said. You rolled your eyes. He looked fine already, you thought.

He went in the bathroom to change his clothes and fix his hair. You lie back down on his bed. You craned your head to look where he put the cube and you saw it by the side table beside the bed. You reach for it but his phone was in the way and it almost fell.

“Whoops,” you whispered as you caught it just in time. Just then, his phone vibrated in your hand. It had just received a text message and because it was in your hand, you can’t help but read it.

“Oppa~ I’m bored. Let’s go out! Are you free? Love yah!  - Jessica” it said.

Tears stung in your eyes once again. You sat down on his bed, still staring at the phone. Then you see her picture in Donghae’s phone – a girl wearing a sleeveless shirt and very short shorts – something you never wore.

“Kye, does this look good on me?” Donghae asked as he went out of the bathroom.

“All this time… you’ve been playing me,” you spitted through your teeth as tears fell from your eyes.

“What? What are you talking about?”

“Why don’t you ask Jessica?!” you shouted. You got up from his bed, stomped out of the room and ran down the stairs.

“Wait! Kyesin!” You hear him call out.

You spun around to look at him one last time with your puffy red eyes. “I’m sorry, Donghae. I can’t do this anymore.” You removed your ring from your finger and placed it on the table near the door. “Goodbye… and oh, Happy Monthsary by the way,” you said angrily before slamming the door shut.

 

You quickly shut the television down. You can’t seem to calm down your racing heart. After three long and lonely years, you see his perfect face one again. You’ve tried so hard to forget him and move on. You moved to the house your parents have given you before from your apartment. You changed your phone number. You changed your route to work. You begged your coach to train you in another rink. You kept everything that involved him in a box in the attic. You avoided everything that would remind you of him.

You decided to catch some fresh air to clear your mind. You grabbed your coat and hung it over what you were already wearing – just a plain blue tee and denim shorts. You wore your sneakers and made your way out.

You walked down the streets with your head down, paying not much attention to where you were going. As you turn around the corner, you nearly hit a guy heading opposite you. “Sorry,” he whispered before walking away.

Another jab to your chest. The scene felt so familiar. You stopped and looked up. The place was familiar. It was where you first met.

 

You had just finished your class for the day but the teacher dismissed you late. You quickly packed your things and you walked quickly out of the school grounds. You were running late for your practice. You could almost hear your coach scolding you again.

As you turn around the curve, the one near the coffee shop, you didn’t notice him not until you bumped into each other. Your books which you carried fell on the ground. The man you bumped bent over quickly to pick them up and stack them for you. He handed it to you with a smile that seemed to make everything else around disappear.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t see you.”

“Me too. Sorry,” you said in a whisper.

“Uhm… I’m Lee Donghae by the way,” he said as he held his hand out. Of course you knew him. He just debuted as a KPop Idol.

“Kyesin. Park Kyesin,” you said as he shook your hand.

“Nice to meet you,” he said. “Where are you headed off anyway? Do you want to get some coffee for a while?”

Then you remember you were already late. “Oh! I’m sorry. I need to go. I’m late for my practice. Thank you, for helping me,” you said as you quickly walked away.

That evening, you get a text message on your phone.

“Annyeong! Kyesin, right? This is Donghae. I got your number from a paper that fell from one of your books. I was just wondering if you wanted to have some coffee sometime?” it said.

You almost dropped your phone as you saw the text. That gorgeous young man you met a while ago texted you. You quickly replied, “Oh, sure. I’d like that.”

“Great!” he texted back. “Are you free this Monday?”

“My class ends at 2 but I have practice at 5~” you texted.

“Oh. That’s perfect. I guess I’ll see you at 3? Will that be okay?”

“Ne~ That’s perfect.”

“See you ^^ I’ll meet you at the place where we met! ㅋㅋㅋ”

 

You sniffed and wiped away the tears forming in your eyes. You kept yourself together and kept walking.  You passed by a bus stop and you wanted to go on for a ride. But as soon as you recognize the place, you regretted going there. Another jab on the chest.

 

Donghae walked you from your school to your practice. He visited you often, and you loved it. He shared some things about himself, and you shared things about yourself too. It was often the highlight of your day.

SCREEEEEEEEECHHHHH, the motorcycle out of control went.

Donghae grabbed you and shielded you with his hand just as it was about to hit you. The motorcycle swerved and went on. You feel your heart beat hard as you process the near death experience. You leaned against the wall and breathed in deeply.

Donghae put his arms on either side of you, focusing his eyes on yours. “Are you okay?” he asked.

You nodded in reply.

Donghae brushed your hair away from your face. He caressed your cheek while looking into your eyes with his deep gaze. You seem to regulate your breathing but your heart won’t stop pounding – not because of the near death experience but because of him touching you.

He suddenly wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close to him. “I was so worried,” he said. Your heart pounded even more as he hugged you for the first time.

“Don’t be. I’m fine, thanks to you,” you said in his embrace. You breathed in deeply, inhaling his scent and familiarizing yourself with it.

He gently pulled away and smiled at you.  He grabbed your hand and pulled you with it. Your frantic heart almost broke out of your chest as he held your hand for the first time. It felt so good, having your hand in his. You loved how it felt. His hand caressing yours; your hand fitting perfectly in his.

He pulled you to the bus stop and sat you there. He sat beside you and wrapped his arms around you, holding your hands. You carefully rested your head on his shoulder and you felt him hug you tighter. He rested his cheek on your head.

“I like how this feels,” he admitted in a soft whisper. “I like you.”

 

You punch one of the poles that held the bus stop angrily. “Babo Kyesin! Why did you even believe him?” you told yourself. You fought the tears forming in your eyes. You didn’t want anyone to see you like this. Fortunately, not long enough, the bus came. You got on, hoping to get out of that place quickly.

You sat down at the back of the bus as you let your tears fall down on your face. You sobbed quietly on your seat. Good thing there weren’t many people on the bus, just around six people. Your heart ached so much, but you weren’t sure why. You tried not to remember his face, how brown his eyes were and how thin his lips were. You tried not to remember the muscles on his arms you’ve once marvelled. You tried not to remember his voice, and how sweet it sounded. You tried not to remember his laugh and his smile. You tried so hard not to remember how happy you were with him.

When the bus stopped for about the third time, you got out. You continued walking, wiping away the tears that fell. People looked at you worriedly, probably because of your puffy eyes, but you didn’t care. You just kept walking. Soon enough you pass by a park. You stopped to sit on the grass, hoping to clear your mind. However, the opposite happens. One more jab to your chest.

 

“Tell me,” Donghae persisted.

“I don’t want to!” you said.

“Please,” he said. He batted his lashes. You laughed. “I promise I won’t laugh.”

“My genetic coding doesn’t let me give in to black mail immediately, Donghae.”

Donghae sighed and lie down the grass. “Fine then. If you won’t tell me, then I’ll just tickle you until you tell me!”

He pulled you, making you lay down next to him. He tickled you, while locking you in his iron grip.

You rolled your eyes and surrendered. “Fine. Fine. I’ll tell you,” you said and sighed. “I forgot to put the lid on the food processor so it exploded on me. Happy?” you said, explaining why you were a mess when he visited you.

Donghae laughed, releasing you in his grip.

“You promised you won’t laugh!” you muttered. You stood up and stomped off.

“I’m sorry. I just can’t help it!” Donghae said as he wrapped his arms around your waist.  

You turned around to face him with your brows furrowed. “Apologize!”

“I’m sorry I laughed at you, my princess. I promise not to do it again,” he said, smiling your favourite smile.

“Promise-shromise! Okay whatever! If only I didn’t like you…” you said, pinching his cheeks.

“You like me?” his eyes twinkled as his smile got bigger.

You suddenly realized you haven’t told him you like him, or how much by that sort. You feel blood running up to your cheeks as you blush red. You look down, but Donghae lifted your head up so that he could look at you. He raised his eyebrows, waiting for your answer.

You close your eyes and sighed. “Mhmm,” you hummed.

Donghae smiled bigger. You expected him to hug you, and to be very honest, you expected him to kiss you. But he didn’t do any of those. He pulled you to where you sat before, sat down, and wrapped his arms tightly around you. He placed his head on top of your head, as you rested on his chest. You closed your eyes and listened to his even breathing.

“Your hair smells good,” Donghae whispered. You smiled.

*FLASH* a rod of lighting shot from the sky.

You didn’t realize that skies grew dark and it was going to rain. The thunder roared. Donghae unwrapped his arms around you and stood up. He held your hand and pulled you up. Just then, heavy rain started to pour. Donghae pulled you by your hand to the nearest shed. The two of you laughed as you got under it, but by the time you were there, both of you and your clothes were already wet.

Donghae removed his jacket and put it on your shoulders, hoping it would warm you up. Now, he was only wearing his white polo that accentuated the muscles on his body. You found it hard to take your eyes off his body but you managed to do it.

“I didn’t think it would rain today,” Donghae said.

“Me neither,” you replied with a smile. His hair was dripping and you thought he looked very hot.

“Now it’s ruined! But I promise to make it memorable,” he said.

“What are you talking about, Hae?” you asked.

Donghae suddenly knelt down in front of you. He put his hand inside his pocket and took out a small black box.

“Donghae! What are you doing? Stand up,” you said. “You don’t need to kneel.”

Donghae stood up and held your face by your chin. “Let me do this right, please. The rain already messed up my plan.” You sighed and nodded in defeat.

Donghae knelt back down and took your hand. “Park Kyesin. Since the moment I met you, my world revolved only around you. It was like fate had decided for us to meet. It was very magical. Of all the days you pass there, you bump into me. That day, I cannot take your face off my mind. I’d keep remembering this beautiful girl. I never thought I would meet such an amazing girl like you. You’re perfect to me. I love you with all my heart. I cannot think of anything else but you. I look forward to seeing you every day. I want to spend my life with you, Kyesin. Will you be my girlfriend?”

Tears rolled down your face. You nodded and smiled. Donghae smiled at you triumphantly. He wore the ring on your finger – it was a simple ring; just a silver ring with Donghae’s name engraved inside. Your name was engraved on Donghae’s ring, in turn.

Donghae stood up and you flung your arms around him. “I love you, too,” you said to him. He embraced you back, pulling you closer. You gently pushed away to look at his face. You cupped his face with both your hands. His arms wrapped around your waist, and pulled you close, your bodies touching.

“I love you,” Donghae told you as he looked at your eyes. You swore you could’ve melted.

“As I love you,” you said to him.

Donghae crushed his lips into yours. His hands moved up to cup your face. Yours moved down to his neck. His tongue traced your lips forcing you to open them. You surrender to his dominance. His tongue went in your mouth and traced over your teeth. He your lips once again before breaking the kiss. His soft lips went down to your neck as you catch your breath.

 

You quickly stood up from the grassy field and ran away as tears fell aggressively. You ran and ran until you were out of breath. It was twilight now, and you kept walking. You remembered there was a ice skating rink nearby and you decided to go there. Skating relaxes you, and that could help you clear your mind. You walked quickly to it.

“Hello, Kye!” the guy from the skates rental greeted. “Isn’t it your day off? Or did coach ask you to practice on Saturdays again?” he asked.

“Nope.” you answered as you took your skates from him – he already knew your size. “I just want to clear my mind. Besides, there’s no harm in skating for the fun of it, right?”

“Of course not. Make sure you don’t get sprained! You competition is just a month away. By the way, I’m praying for you.”

“Thanks,” you smiled a little.

You put on your skates, took off your coat and went in the rink. There weren’t many people there. Just two boys and a girl. They all knew you, because you came to the ice skating industry earlier. You glided effortlessly on ice. It seemed effective to calm you down. However, as you did a quad, you heard him call your name. “Kyesin!” his voice seem to come out of nowhere. You lost your balance and fell. And then another jab to your chest.

 

“Kyesin!” Donghae called. “Kyesin! Wait for me!”

“Catch me if you can!” you giggled as you glided on ice.

“You’re unfair! You’re an ice skater!”

You stuck your tongue out on him.

Donghae charged up, skating as fast as he can to you. You weren’t expecting him to bring you here. All he said that morning was that he had a surprise, and surely you were. You hugged him tight and thanked him. He knew how much you loved skating, and he wanted to try it with you. “You said once you wanted to be like Kim Yuna,” Donghae explained.

“Kyesin! Wait up!” Donghae said.

“Look! You’re skating!” Kyesin clapped her hands. She went towards him with a smile and held his hand.

Donghae beamed at her but then he lost his balance and fell flat on ice. He pulled you down with him. You both laughed.

Donghae cupped your cheek and slowly pressed his lips against yours. Your lips parted and so did his. His tongue traced your lips, sending you shivers down your spine. He bit your lower lip before pulling away.

 

 The three other people rushed to your side.

“Eonnie, are you okay?” the girl asked.

“Yes, thank you,” you said as you stood up. You craned your neck, looking for him.

“Noona, does anything hurt?” one of the guys asked.

“No, thankfully. I’m fine. I guess I need to rest for a while,” you said.

You skated out of the rink, still hoping to find who you’re looking for. For countless minutes, you looked, but he was nowhere in sight. You sighed and face palmed yourself. “Babo yah! It’s only your imagination.” You removed your skates and put your sneakers back on. You went to the counter and returned the skates.

“Done already? It’s just an hour,” the rental guy said.

“Yep. I don’t feel like it,” you said.

You took your coat and put it on. You went out of the building, only to be welcomed by a cool breeze. You pulled your coat tighter. It was dark already, probably 6 pm. You walked again, not sure where you were really going. You walked and walked, hoping for a place where you wouldn’t remember him. You went to an unfamiliar path, and as you walked, you smell something good. Freshly baked bread, or newly made cake. You follow the scent, leading you to a cake shop. You peeked inside, looking at the delicious cakes on display. Then, one thing caught your eye. The pattessier, wearing a painstakingly familiar white jacket, went out of the kitchen to serve his customers. A further jab to your chest.

 

You rushed to your boyfriend’s apartment. It was only a couple of minutes ago when he texted you an urgent message: “Kyesin, please help me. I’m hurting and my heart aches. I don’t know what to do… Please come. I need you.”

You didn’t even think twice. You dropped everything that you were doing, got your jacket and hired a taxi to his place. You held your phone nervously, and anxiously sat inside the taxi. It was already almost midnight, and it didn’t even occur to you that it was going to be your birthday in a couple of minutes. All you thought of was Donghae.

You arrived at his place just a minute before midnight. You knocked on his door but he didn’t answer. “Donghae yah? It’s me, Kyesin!” you said. Still no answer. You knocked again, but there was only silence. You grew more worried. You grabbed the key under his mat where he always kept it, and unlocked the door.

It was very dark inside. You can’t see anything. The clock suddenly beeped, signifying it was already midnight, making you jump.

“Donghae yah?” you called.

Suddenly, a pair of arms grabbed you from behind. You struggled to get away from the infiltrator but he was too strong. He pulled you close to him, spun you around, put his hands on either side of your face, and crushed his lips to yours. That instant, your whole body relaxed, recognizing the lips on your lips. It was soft, and just the way you like it. It was Donghae’s.

Donghae’s hands crept down to the small of your back and pulled you even closer to him, not breaking your kiss. You giggled and wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to him. You knew this pleased him – and it did. Donghae pulled gently away, and stared at your face. He smiled wide.

“What?” you asked.

He bent his head down and kissed your neck. His kisses went up to your ears. “Happy Birthday,” he whispered. You giggled.

“You made me worried,” you said as you stared at his brown eyes.

“Sorry, love. It was the only way that I’d get you here right on time,” he smirked.

You rolled your eyes at him. You tiptoed to reach his face, and he gratefully bent down to help you. You pressed your lips to his gently, but quickly pulled away. Donghae frowned. “Thank you,” you said to him.

He smiled at you and flipped the lights open. You took in the sudden brightness, noticing Donghae was wearing a chef’s jacket – the one pattessiers wear. You raised your eyebrow at him.

“I made something for you,” Donghae said.

“Eh?” you said.

“Mhmmm…” he hummed. Donghae grabbed your hand and led you to the dining table. There, in the middle of the table, lay a circular white cake with a panda couple figurine on top. “I know you like pandas,” Donghae explained.

“You made this?” you asked him.

“Yup. Do you like it?” he asked.

You shook your head. “No, Donghae.” Donghae’s face fell but you quickly cleared it up. “Donghae, baby, I love it!” you said as you threw your arms around him, giving him another kiss. “And I love the pandas too.”

“I saw it in a store,” he said with a chuckle. “This is you,” he pointed to the slightly smaller panda. “and this is me,” he pointed to the bigger one.

You smiled at him. “Thank you,” you said again. “I love you.”

“I love you.” In a split second you were in his arms again, your lips on his lips.

 

You ran away from the coffee shop, not standing the pain of your aching heart. It was very dark, and the only thing lighting your way were the street lights. You ran as the tears fell from your eyes. You lean on a lamp post in an empty street as you continued to sob. You clutch your heart, hoping the pain would go away. You sat on the sidewalk and buried your face in your hands.

After a few minutes, you hear someone talking. You lifted your head slightly up.

“Oppa~ You’re drunk already! Let’s go home, oppa,” a girl said to a guy walking wobbly.

“I’m not drunk,” he laughed weirdly. Obviously drunk. “Take me home with you.”

“Oppa! Let’s go!”

“You’re so cute!” the guy pinched the girl’s cheeks.

“Yah! Oppa!!!” the girl giggled.

“I love you,” the man managed to say despite his dizziness.

“I love you, too, oppa,” the girl replied.

The man pressed his lips against hers, and you looked away – not in disgust but in pain. You remembered him again, throwing another jab to your chest.

 

You were startled by a knock on your door. It was already eleven in the evening, and you didn’t expect anyone coming over. You peeped through the hole in your door, and saw Donghae looking down outside. You quickly opened the door to welcome your boyfriend in. Donghae looked up and smiled widely at you.

“Oppa! Why are you here? I thought you’re going to have dinner with your friends?” you said.

Donghae said nothing. He went in, closed the door and wrapped his arms around you. He bent his head down, and kissed your neck. “Mmmm…” he hummed, as if pleasuring himself.

“Donghae?” you said, confused. He wasn’t like this.

He stood up straight to look at you in your eyes. He lifted your chin and slowly bent his head down to press his lips unto yours. His lips were soft, just as before, but tasted different. It tasted alcohol.

You gently pushed him away but his grip on you was locked tight. You waited until he was done kissing you, though it took a lot of time. He pulled slowly away, smirking at you.

“You’re drunk, aren’t you?” you . He laughed and continued on your neck. You pushed him away with all your might. “You need to get some sleep,” you told him.

“I don’t think I can drive anymore,” he challenged you.

“I’ll get you a cab,” you said. You didn’t know how to drive.

“Getting a cab this late isn’t safe. Moreover, I’m drunk,” he said, further continuing the challenge.

“Well then, I’ll go with you,” you said.

“And how will you get home? I can’t let you travel alone this late.”

You narrowed your eyes on him, figuring out his plan. He smirked at you.

“Come on. Just accept that you’ll have to keep me in for the night,” he said.

You rolled your eyes, surrendering in defeat. “Fine. Go sleep in my room.”

Donghae took your hand and tugged you to your bedroom. “Tuck me in, will you?” he said. Aegyoing.

You sighed, but found his aegyo cute. You followed him to your room. He spun around to take you in his arms and kiss you.  “I think I should be drunk more often,” he laughed and you laughed with him.

He went further in the room, and he did something you least expected. He pulled down his pants to his knees, revealing his boxers under it. You quickly looked away in embarrassment as he stepped away in his pants. He took you in his arms, but still, you looked away. “What’s wrong, Kye?” he asked.

“Uhm… why did you remove your pants?” you managed to ask him.

He laughed. “My pants are very constricting,” he said as he kissed your cheek. You looked at his face, avoiding looking down. He smirked at you, and started ing his shirt.

“Are you trying to seduce me?” you accused him.

“Maybe… Is it working?” he grinned widely at you.

You smiled widely at him. He smiled back. You pushed him to the bed, making him lie down on his back. You pulled the covers over him. “Now, stop seducing me and go to sleep. You need to rest,” you said.

Donghae grabbed your arm just as you were walking away. “Sleep with me, princess,” he said in such an innocent face that you can’t possibly resist.

“I still need to fix some things outside,” you said.

“Please?” he pouted and aegyoed.

“Okay, babe,” you brushed your free hand against his cheek. “After I fix those things, okay?”

Donghae pouted but nodded. He kissed your hand before letting go. “Don’t take too long.”

You went out of your room shakily, knowing there’s a man waiting for you in your bedroom. You tried to shrug the idea away, but the picture of Donghae in your bed was just too impossible for you to forget. You went to the sink and continued washing the dishes. After a few minutes, you felt a pair of arms hug you from behind. Donghae kissed you on your shoulder.

“I can’t sleep without you,” he said.

“I’m almost done,” you said to him, turning your head to the side to meet his kiss.

You washed the last couple of plates and put them in the drier. He kept his arms around you as you went to the living room and fixed the pillows on the sofa.

“Are you done now?” he asked impatiently.

“Yup,” you said. He quickly unwound his arms around you and scooped you from under. He carried you to your bed, making you laugh on the way. “Donghae yah! Put me down!” you said.

He laid you on your bed and he climbed over you. He locked his lips unto yours, using his tongue to spice up the kiss. You kiss him back mightily, knotting your hands in his hair. He lowered his hips, grinding his hips to your hips. It was very seducing and pleasurable, and you knew he was enjoying it, too.  His hands fell from your face to your neck, then to your shoulders, to your arms, to your waist and then to your hips. He searched for the hem of your shirt, and tugged it up, trying to remove it from you. When you realized what he was doing, you quickly pushed him away.  Donghae looked at you, confused.

“No, Donghae. I can’t… I don’t want to… yet,” you said in a whisper. His face was torn. “I love you, babe. But I just can’t do this right now. I don’t think I’m ready to have .”

Donghae looked down and sighed. He nodded after. He started kissing your neck again, on your collarbone.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered by his ear.

“Don’t be. I understand,” he said. “Just, sleep with me tonight, okay?” he requested.

“Of course,” you answered, happy he wasn’t mad.

“I love you,” he said as he stared into your eyes.

“As I love you,” you told him.

He smirked once again, before crushing his lips to yours.

 

Tears fell down from your eyes like a waterfall. You can’t control them anymore; you can’t hold them back. You stood up from the sidewalk and ran away. You wondered why the things you do to avoid him just seem to bring him more back. Even in places where he never set foot, you’d find something that would make you remember him.

You cried as you realized that you were hurt not because he betrayed you but because you miss him more than anything else.  You wanted to see his face again. You wanted to feel the warmth of his hand caressing yours. You wanted to feel his embrace one more time. You miss his kisses. You miss him sneaking up on you, only to wrap his arms from behind. You miss his voice; you wanted to hear him sing to you again, just as what he would do when you would fall asleep.  You wanted that night again, so badly, for it was the best night of your life, but this time, this time you wouldn’t hold back. You’d completely surrender to him, not matter what. You don’t want to lose any memory of him, for all these were the best of your memories.

You surrendered yourself. You can’t avoid these places anymore. Something would make you remember him anywhere. It suddenly started raining, but you didn’t care. You ran to the place you’ve always liked, and where you knew you would remember him.

When you get to the Han River, there wasn’t a single soul in sight. Perhaps because it was raining. You sat on the bench, the bench were the two of you always sat. You put your feet up and rested your head on your knees. You let the tears fall endlessly as you remembered everything: from the moment you met, until the moment you left him. You missed everything about him.

You thought you were going crazy because you suddenly hear his voice again. But it hurted you more, hearing his voice. “Too bad it’s only my imagination,” you said to yourself. You close your eyes, taking in much of his voice, missing it dearly. Then it grew louder.

“Kyesin?” it said. More tears fell from your eyes.

You could not stand it anymore. You need him badly. You stood up from the bench, gave the river one last look, and sighed. You turned away and headed for home.

But somehow, the voice got even louder – and clearer. “Kyesin!” it called out.

You close your eyes once more while walking. It hurted you more now. You heard his voice, such familiar voice, but he wasn’t here. You wanted to just hug him, and say you were sorry, but you can’t. You blame your imagination for playing his voice.

“Kyesin!” You hear the voice right beside you. At the same instant, you feel it hug you – a perfectly familiar hug. It was a hug no one else can give but him. It felt so good it can only be real.

You open your eyes and looked down, gasping as you saw a pair of arms wrapped around you. You slowly spun around and faced him. You looked up, seeing his gorgeous face under his hood. A new set of tears fell as you threw your arms around him.

“Don’t disappear,” you whispered to yourself.

“I won’t,” he said as he took you in his arms.

The two of you stood there for a long time, under the pouring rain. You didn’t want to let go. You were afraid your little imagination would vanish into thin air. You sobbed on his chest, inhaling his scent that you’ve always loved.

“I’ve waited for three long years to see you here. I never knew I’d see you again, but still, I wished every night I would,” he whispered. “I never had the chance to say how sorry I am.”

You didn’t want to let go, but you knew you had to. You unwrapped your arms and walked away. He then, grabbed you by your hand and spun you around.

“I – I can’t… I need to go… It’ll be harder to say goodbye the longer time you’re with me,” you cried.

“Why are you saying goodbye?” he asked; his voice cracked.

“You’re not real,” you sobbed once again as he crushed you into his chest.

“I am real…” he said.

“No you’re not… I’m just imagining you.”

He gently pushed you away and cupped your face. “I never imagine how much I’ve hurt you, and I’m sorry for that. That day… the day you left me was the worst day of my life. My whole world collapsed without you. Every day at work, I’d put on the best smile I could… but deep inside I was hurting. And every single day I would miss you more. I love you, Kyesin. I still do, a lot.”

“And I love you, Donghae… so much… Too bad you’re not real…” you trailed off.

“I am real,” he pointed it out to you. “And I’ll prove it to you.”

Donghae pressed his lips unto yours slowly. It was just like your first kiss, only now, he wanted you more than anything else. You surrendered to his kiss, making him completely devour your lips.

As you pulled away to catch your breath, you stared at him with conviction. “You’re real, aren’t you?” you asked as you touched his face.

Donghae held both your hands and said, “Yes, I am.”

“Oh Donghae!” you exclaimed as you hugged him tight. “I miss you. SO much. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be. I was the one who was wrong. I am sorry, for everything… for all the pain I’ve caused,” Donghae said as he brushed your hair. He pushed you gently to look into your eyes. “I’m not going to hurt you again, if you give me another chance.”

You took his face in both your hands and kissed his lips. “I just want you back.”

“I’m all yours, princess,” Donghae said before crushing his lips once again to yours. “I’m never letting you go,” he mumbled on your lips as he ended the kiss.

You smiled at him as he wiped the water off your face.

“Sleep with me tonight, princess,” he quoted.

You nodded slightly and took his lips to your lips. He smirked on your lips and pulled you close, casually grinding his hips to yours.

"You know my bed is perfectly comfortable for that," you .

"Hmmm... it's too far... my backseat's pretty big," he said. He scooped you up and carried you - bridal style - to his Audi, and lay you there on his backseat.