★ GreenALiveTnS;

Title.

"I'll be". I think the title is attractive. The title did piqued some interest in me at first but I was thinking why just these two words that makes no sense at all? But I do believe it means what Baekhyun 'will be' doing for Jiyeon, I believe. (As stated in the last paragraph.) It was special and definitely will make readers click on your story!

Description and Foreword.

Your description was short and sweet for an one-shot. I think one or two sentences are enough for an one-shot.

As for your foreword, I loved how you wrote a simple 'poem' to suit your story.

However, I still think you can still work on the aesthetics view of your story. The words can be arranged more nicely. This is not a very important point to writing but as to publishing a story, I think the aesthetics point do help a little on attracting readers.

Plot.

This plot can be considered original and realistic. I understand it may be hard to make a story original but your story was not widely seen. Some type of love stories are super common but I consider yours different and realistic. Although it was the common type of 'love at first sight' kind of story, it was still sweet how their relationship developed. I liked how their relationship was developed through music, this was special. It was scary at the thought of a random stranger coming up to you at midnight but it develops Jiyeon's character.

The ending caught me by surprise though. I thought they will continue developing their relationship but in the end, Jiyeon leaves and sort of confesses to Baekhyun. It was a little cliché but it still makes your story special.

Language.

I think your use of English was not bad. I read the while story fluently and I did not come across any grammatical or spelling errors which I was quite pleased about. Please remember to revise your story over again before posting it up to avoid typos or any careless grammatical/spelling errors. I hope you can improve on your vocabulary though. There was not too much variety of vocabulary words used though but that can be worked on.

Flow.

For an one-shot, your story flowed extremely well. The whole story was well-paced and not rushed.

Characterization.

Your characters were well-managed. Since there were only two characters, it will be easter on this part. Both your characters, Jiyeon and Baekhyun have their personalities and were widely shown by their actions. I like the contrast and how they end up falling in love. Good job on this part.

Overall Enjoyment.

The story was good but not so appealing to me. However, I still find the story well-written. Add a few more good phrases though. You sure have potential in writing and I wish you the best if you are going to write a sequel or another story. I tend to be slightly strict as I dislike badly written stories but to get so much compliments from me means your story is really good!

Grade: A

Thank you for requesting!