Today is the day, the day when the one I love born. This is the day when an angel born to this world and destined to be my soulmate. I assumed the day when she was born it rained a lot. That’s because the sky must give up its most precious angel, that’s why the sky is crying hehehe. Why I became cheesy all of sudden? I thought about it and it made me smiling like an idiot.

She is so important for me. She is one of a few people who know me so well. The first time I met her is in our middle school’s gate. I remembered it well and will always remember it as the first time we met. She is smart, stunning, and perfectly beautiful. She always understands me. She is always beside me when I need somebody to lean on. Even if there is something that she did make me angry, I know she is doing it because she was afraid if my action will hurt me. When my friends didn’t believe me and left me, she believed and stay beside me. She is my bestfriend. My first hug, my first kiss, my first bestfriend, and of course my first love. Yes, I fell in love with her, with all my heart and with my whole world. I didn’t know when I fell in love with her. I just knew whenever she near me, my heart started to beat fast and I felt butterfly flying in my stomach.

In this birthday I want to give her something special. I wanted everything to be perfect. Well, I might not beside her because I am in another town and she is in another place but still I wanted to celebrate her birthday. So, here I am, in a famous French restaurant where we used to go dinner when we visited this town. I sat on our usual spot, I ordered many various foods. I am a god of food after all. She always complains about my big appetite, she was worried if I hurt myself when I am eating too many foods. I ate in silent while the band played song and I found I am listening to the song as well. After the song finished, I had an idea. I approached the band and requested a song. I requested “heaven” by Bryan Adams. You always said that it is one of your favorite songs. The song was played and suddenly I drowned into the melody. I started to think about you and it made me feel like you are right next to me. Just thought about it once again make my smile wider.

After dinner, I went to flower shop. I bought a bouquet of pink roses because she likes pink. No no no, she doesn’t like pink but she loves pink. I remembered when I accompanied her to shopping. She squealed like a child when she saw dress, bag, or shoes in pink. She asked me to buy all of the items for her and after that she ended up scolded by her mom because she bought too many items. I just smiled when I see her scolded by her mom and her mom told me to not spoil her anymore. I said yes and nodded to her mom but at the corner of my eyes, I saw her pouting and folded her arms in front of her chest. She is so cute when she is slightly angry and it made me want to pinch her rosy pink cheek. A sound of a car alarm made me back to reality. I quickly paid the flower and step out from that flower shop. I got in my car and told my driver to drive me to her house. I hope it’s not late. I looked up to the window and I once again, remember about her. This time I remembered that sometimes she can be so cheesey.

*flashback*

I just arrived in my apartment after traveled in Japan for business. I quickly took a bath and after that I just lied in my bed to relax my body. Suddenly my phone rang and I smiled when I saw the caller ID.

“hey there! How are you?” I asked.

“I am fine. Did I disturb your sleep?” she asked me with her sweet voice.

“nah, I am not sleeping. I just lie on my bed. Besides, I don’t mind if an angel disturbs my sleep. Instead of angry, I will very happy hehehe”, I said to her.

“yah! Stop with the sweet talking. I’ve heard enough from you”, I just chuckle to her respond.

“really? But you are really like it right? When I am sweet talking with you? Hehehe’, I said.

“well some of your pick-up lines is fine but some of them is lame”, she responded.

“what? Lame? I am hurting right now because your word. It is very hard to make a pick-up line”, I whined at her.

“stop whined because you are not a baby anymore”, she said.

“I know I am not a baby anymore but I am your baby right? Hehehe”, I said.

“that was lame, Choi”, she giggled.

“ok fine. Now I want you to make pick-up lines. You said before that it is easy and you never called me baby or honey. You always called me by my name or called me shikshin. Even you called me by my sure name”, I said while pouting.

“awww my shikshin is angry. Ok I will grant your wish. Ummm what should I said?”, there is a silence before she continued talking.

“ahh I know. Youngie my shikshin, do you like fishing?”, she asked.

“umm yes. Why?”, I asked back.

“because you caught my heart hehehe”, she said while laughing and I found myself laughing as well.

“that was not bad hehehe. I guess it is time to sleep, princess. You should hang up”, I said.

“no, I want to talk with my sooyoungie all night long. I miss you so bad, you left me here for almost 3 weeks”, she whined. What? Sooyoungie? She never called me with that nickname before.

“but princess, you must go to sleep. It is getting late. Besides, I will be scolded by your mom if she knew you are talking with me all night long instead of sleeping”, I said calmly.

“umm okay then. But before I hang up I want to say something”, she said.

“what it is?”, I asked her.

“sooyoungie, I love you for 999 years, 364 days, 59 minutes, and 59 seconds. But you just have to love me for one second. When you do, it will complete our thousand-year love will complete. Good night, sooyoungie. I love you”, she said cheerfully and then hung up and left me dumbfounded and smiling like an idiot.

*flashback end*

I arrived at her house, I stepped out from the car and walked to the front door. I rang the bell and after a while a beautiful girl opened the door and greeted me.

“oh hi, oppa! I didn’t expect you come today. Come in”, she said.

“of course I come ,krys. It is her birthday”, I said casually.

“yeah oppa, this is my sister’s birthday”, she smiled weakly.

“very well, then. Krys, I’ll take my leave now. I want to go your sister place before it’s late”, I said to her.

“oh okay oppa. Be safe”, she said and hugged me.

I got into the car and told my driver to go to her place. After 10 minutes or so, I arrived at her place. I nervously stepped out from the car. Suddenly my feet felt numb and my heart beat fast. I walked and finally reach my destination. The place where she is lying. The place where she sleep for eternity.

“hi, princess. Happy birthday to you”, I nervously said.

“I hope it is not late hehehe. I can’t come here earlier because I have work in another town. I sorry”, I said again.

“I hope you are not mad at me princess. I know it is been a long time since I visit you, don’t mad at me please”, I smiled with teary eyes.

“princess, answer me please. I know you are hearing me”, I said sadly.

“look, I bring you a bouquet of pink roses”, I kneeled down and put the roses I brought on the ground.

After a moment of silence finally I broke down into tears. I cried and cried.

“well princess, I received your letter. You see? I am perfectly fine right now. You don’t have to worry about me”, I said with tears rolling on my face.

“I want to tell you something. When you left me, it feels like the world has clashed. I am broken, I am hurt because you are my breath. Until now, even time passed everything can’t change every single thing about you in my eyes. You will never be replaced with another person”, I sobbed and I felt my hearth become weak, tears kept rolling on my cheek.

“until now, I still don’t believe you are not beside me. it feels like you are always beside me“, I said while smiling. “princess, today in your birthday I want to sing you a song, our favorite song”, I said again.

I sat in front of her grave and started to sing.

As we pass the fragrant road in this beautiful season

My cautious footsteps pound in my head

When you come closer while smiling for me

It feels like all the happiness in the world is mine

The late afternoon sun wakes me up and I don’t know why but I smile

Although it still be far in the future

I don’t want it to just be a dream

Just one love

Two of us can walk the same road together

I hope to be like that

Although as time passes we may change

Let’s not let go our hands

When it came to the end of the song, I cried even harder and I can’t sang the song properly.

Just for love forever

Let’s this be our last love

I wish for that

To make my life complete

You make my life complete

“princess, you make my life complete. You teach me to love, you make me feel happy, you make me feel jealous when I see you with another man, you make me sad and miserable when you leave me. thank you for letting me to love to be loved. Thank you for everything”, I said.

“and for your information, I don’t know you can be so sweet when I read your letter. Do you want me to read it for you?” I stood and took the letter inside my pocket. “okay here we go, listen carefully, princess”, I said while wiping my tears.

Dear sooyoungie,

To the person I considered my soulmate. I know when you read this letter, I am no longer by your side. Please don’t be sad sooyoungie. I want to tell you when you came to my life, I know we are meant to be. You are my bestfriend, my first and last love, you are my everything. I want you to be happy even though I am not beside you. I want you to live your life. Before you meet me you are perfectly fine and I guess you can life without me. I want to set you free. I want you to continued live and move on.

You know sooyoungie, we must learn to let the one we love to go. Love is not just falling in love but it how to make the one we love be happy even though you feel really hurt when you do that. If you really love me, you must let me go and continued your life with happy smile. You want me to be happy, right? Please do it for me. you can survive it and that is all I want. You do not need me, you can find your own happiness with your strength. Sooyoungie, star of my heart, please be happy.

And before I go, I want to tell you that your pick-up lines are not lame. It is very sweet and I really love it. Sooyoungie, maybe you can fall from the sky or maybe you can fall from the tree, but you have the best way to fall because you are falling in love with me.

With love,

JJ-SY

I finished reading the letter and kneeled,”see? You are very sweet. I will do everything you want me to do. I will move on, but you’ll always be a part of me. my love, my misery, I am letting go of you now. It is time to set myself free. This is the hardest thing I will do because I still love you and this love, this is all I have and you shall rest in peace until I come to you”