Keep running.

 

 

11 years old. They said he should be entering school by now. But his parents knew too well that he couldn’t. They said they couldn’t let him run loose. Their words were like venom to his ears and their eyes literally screamed murder. The boy beside them did not utter a sound but looked to his side. 

So he was this fearful.

The rock on the road was only a few inches away. He could already feel his head splitting on contact.

 Should I? he thought instead. A whisper of the voice answered him as he looked away. Keep running.

 

 

12 years old. The boy saw the neighboring kid return home with a diploma. He felt disappointed that he couldn’t go school. He wanted to go out of his house and play with the other kids too. HIs parents hated how others talked to him, as though as he would cause trouble later.

So he was this unwanted. 

He looked at the sharpened color pencil in his hand and his vein horribly close to it. All it took was a stab.

Should I?, he asked the voice. The voice answered back with a soft tone. Keep running.

 

 

13 years old. His parents are going to divorce. He stood in his room as he watched them scream at each other in the living room. He then entered the living room with his soft toy in his hand. His parents both stared at him before slapping him on the face. He weakly got up and trotted back to his room with the soft toy still held firmly in his hand.

So he was this much of a burden.

He looked at the pointy study table corner and touched it softly. Everything would end with just a knock.

Should I?, he asked again. The voice answered him again as he slowly climbed up his bed to sleep. Keep running.

 

 

14 years old. His mother bought an apartment for both of them to live. He entered the apartment carefully before curling up in the living room as he felt tons of glances surrounding him. His mother stared at him before locking him in his room for the day. He felt scared; he didn't want them to judge him.

So he was this disgusting to the eye.

He slowly crawled over to the box on his left and pulled out a very long piece of cloth. One hook on the nail above his head and all the unwanted feelings would be gone.  

Should I?, he asked in a scared tone. The voice answered back in a comforting way as he started to tie butterfly knots on the cloth. Keep running.

 

 

15 years old. His mother found out that he was unable to speak full logical sentences anymore. The boy was only able to mumble a few words before screaming non-stop. His mother would always end it by slapping him and locking him in the room without food for the day.

The boy didn't care. He knew the hatred his mother had for him. He wanted to be left alone. The voices around him disturbed him enough.  

The voices that peirced his brain every minute. Their words that killed his soul again and again.

But he still listened to that one voice. The voice that told him to keep running.

 

 

16 years old. He couldn’t speak anymore. All he did was scribble on papers with color pencils. The boy wore the same shirt for a whole month without bathing and he doesn’t even go the toilet to empty himself anymore. His mother didn't dare touch his room as it stank heavily with excrement and she only forced him out to bathe every month.

He believed that the voices will accept his drawing and stop disturbing him. Countless "sorry's" and "thank you's" written on paper was left on the floor as he continued. Sorry for stopping them at disturbing him and thank you for realizing his existance.  

The desperate plead from him didn't work yet he still continued.

Everyday, he would still ask the voice, Should I? and the voice would still reply him with the same answer. Keep running.

 

 

17 years old. He couldn’t remember when was the last time he took a bath. To be more exact, he couldn’t really remember anything anymore. He could still recall some, but anything that happened two weeks before was something his mind couldn't process anymore. He knew he was called Yang Yoseob. He knew he was 17 that year. Nothing more. The voices around him started to disturb him even more. He even saw people entering his room as he jerked away every time they got close.

He hated the looks they gave him. It made him felt like he was rubbish, a piece of crap, a mere item of hatred.

He looked at the mirror inside his room. The shards would be sharp enough to cut the skin.

Should I?, he asked with a more lifeless tone. The voice gave him the same answer as from six years ago. Keep running.

 

 

18 years old. He was still locked in his room. He didn't even bother wearing clothes anymore. His body and hair was covered with lumps of either excrement or dirt that he slept on at night. Every minute, the boy’s emotion changes drastically. He’ll start crying in the first minute but then he’ll start laughing madly in the next. His mother couldn’t stand his madness and left the apartment a week before.

Good. At least someone wouldn't be disturbing him anymore. He gave a light laugh at how pathetic he looked right now. The people around him kept telling him that there's no point now.

But the boy still doesn’t care. He only needed the voice. And he’ll keep running if the voice told him to.

 

 

19 years old. “Can I stop running now?” “If you want to.” “Thank you. I need a nap after so long.” The boy said while smiling before jumping off the building.

 

 

The boy with big brown irises and a bowl haircut. The boy who was secretly abused by his parents. The boy who was mentally unstable. The boy who committed suicide after many years of suffering. The boy named Yang Yoseob.

 

 

He would have survived if they only noticed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A/N : I shall repeat this again. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SEOBBIE :DD okay I know I know. what is this bull you're writing on someone's birthday? are you cursing him or something? well guys, I know I shouldn't have wrote something so erm...non-positive on someone's birthday but I just want to dedicate something on his birthday. Don't take it the wrong way, I will trade my life to not let him turn into that okay? to know more about this mental problem he has, it's called schizophrenia. you can check it on wiki cause wikimis just awesome. if I got anything wrong, please inform me and I'll change it quickly okay?

comment if you want, I don't like forcing.

main pic:yoseopu