I'm so sorry guys for taking two weeks -_-.. I broke my promise :( . because i forgot that last week is my sister's marriage, so i was kinda busy. But... here for you guys, hope you guys enjoy it, and i promise i will update as soon as possible...

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Amber POV

Finally Jjong hyung is asleep now, so I decide to catch some fresh air outside. So many things are crossing my mind. I feel like my head is so heavy, my chest is narrow, and I feel like it’s so hard for me to breath. So I need some fresh air.

I get out of Jjong hyung’s room and I close the door silently.

“Hufh…”, I blow a sigh, I’m thinking what I’d better do right now.

“Hi Amber”

I hear someone calls my name, the voice is familiar to me. I furrow my brows as I see who called me, “Nu…nuna??”

Yeah, she’s Jessica nuna. I don’t know why is she here, but she’s approaching me now. She’s bringing to cups of hot instant coffee.

“You…you want to see hyung?”

“Yeah… I was about to see him, but I think it would be nice if we enjoy coffee first. Are you free?”

“Ye…yeah”

“Good. here”, Jessica nuna hands me a cup of hot coffee, “let’s have a sit”, she says.

“U-uh? O-okay… over there”, I awkwardly point to the bench.

“So…… how’s Jjong?”, Jessica nuna asks me as we take a seat.

I inhale before answer, “doctor said his condition suddenly dropped. But I’m sure he’ll be better soon, I …….. I hope he’ll get better soon”

Jessica nuna nods, “I hope so”, she stares me in the eyes and give me a smile.

“Uh… nuna… I’m sorry about what I did last time… I just said sorry and left.. I…”

“You were so rude”, she says sarcastically, but then she flashes a smile, “but it’s okay”

“I… I’m sorry”

“Told you it’s okay”

“…thanks nuna……… hope you’ll forgive me”

Jessica nuna rolls her eyes, “stop apologizing will you?”, she glares at me.

I bow my head, “…I’m sor… I mean…”

Jessica nuna sighs, “the youngest Liu is really stupid. Told you to stop apologizing, but you said ‘sorry’ again and again”

I just scratch my back.

The blonde haired girl next to me sips her coffee. Seeing her face reminds me to her little sister. I… I really miss her little sister.

“Nu…nuna… can I ask you something?”

“Please do”, she answers while glancing at me.

“It’s… it’s about Krystal”

“Hm… she’s not okay. She really is not”

“W-what?? What hap…”

“Amber, listen”, Jessica nuna stares me in the eyes, “whatever it is, you better tell her the truth”

I widen my eyes. What does she mean by ‘the truth’? Seems like she knows that I’m hiding something, “The…the truth?”

“Amber, she’s so sad, you know she keeps staying in her room in whole days, she doesn’t have any appetite, she barely speaks, my parents and me are really worried that she’ll get sick”, Jessica nuna lets out deep sigh, “You know Amber, she thought you’re playing her feeling, and I know that you’re not. Why don’t you just tell her the reason why you do this? I know you have a reason don’t you?”

“………………no…… I don’t need to tell any reason because I don’t have any”, I avoid Jessica nuna’s gaze.

“Don’t lie Amber…… I’m sorry…I eavesdropped your conversation with Jonghyun”

I feel like my heart jumps, I take a look at Jessica nuna with disbelief, “w…what do you mean?”

“………….why you do this Amber….. why you bear it yourself………”

I don’t know why, but I can’t hold my tears anymore. Feels like my chest is overloaded, and now it’s exploding.

“………… I ….. I…….”, it’s so hard for me to speak, my chest so hurts.

I feel Jessica nuna’s hand on my back, “spill it Amber”

“…… I love……them… both…… I don’t…… I don’t wanna lose them…….. but…… Jjong needs a life… he said…… he’s always happy everytime he sees Krystal…… if he’s happy, it would make his condition better… I … I don’t wanna ruin my brother’s happiness…… he needs it… he needs it to stay alive”

“…… Am, listen. My sister will understand if you…”

“No, please Jessie Nuna, don’t tell this to Krys…”

Jessie nuna narrows her eyes, “Don’t be stupid Amber”

“I… I just don’t want her to think that I love my brother more than I love her. I don’t want her to think that I just care about my brother and I don’t care about her…… because it’s not like that…… I …… I love Krystal… I really do. But it’s hard for me to decide, I can’t choose”

“You know Amber”, Jessica nuna removes her hand from my back, “it means you don’t trust my sister”

I blink, I don’t understand what just she said.

“But if that what you want, I won’t tell about this to my sister. It’s you, you should be the one to tell her about this”

***       

Krystal POV

Finally I decided to move on. My parents are worrying me, and I think I just make them sad if I keep drowning in my brokenness. This morning I got out of my room, I greeted my parents with smile, well, I forced a smile on my face and pretended like I feel better already. My parents looked shocked and happy in the same time, and I felt relieve when I saw their smile.

I also called Jessica unnie. I told her that I’m okay and I feel much better. But I know, she’s still worried about me.

I decided to forget about my feeling for Amber. I think I shouldn’t have this kind of feeling for her. I think it would be better if I just love her as a best friend, so that I wouldn’t feel the pain in heart just like now, but ………… you can’t control your feeling right?

“Krystal, we’ll have dinner with Liu family tonight. Hae and Jessie also come”

I was reading a magazine when my mom told me that.

“……Mom… can I stay at home tonight? I’m still……feeling unwell”, I say to my mom. Honestly, I’m just not ready yet to see Amber, my heart is still hurt.

“Oh come on dear. We’ll have a little party tonight”

“Party?”

Mom nods, “jonghyun will come back home tonight”

“Jonghyun oppa comes back home??”

***       

The situation in Liu’s house is so merry. Everyone looks happy specially the Lius, of course they are, since today they’re back together in their lovely house. Yes, Jonghyun oppa is here too, he looks so weak to be honest, but seeing his smile I’m sure that he’s happy right now. I don’t know why but somehow I feel Jonghyun oppa keeps stealing glance at me, maybe it’s just my thought.

Amber, well I don’t know, we keep avoiding each other. I’m trying my best to avoid her and she really is ignoring me, she acts like I’m not here with them.

“And…… it’s time for our little ones to wash the dishes!”, I hear uncle Liu says cheerfully.

I look up to uncle Liu in shock.

“D…Dad…”, Amber speaks hesitantly, “I can’t wash you know that”

“Then Krystal will teach you”

“……aish….. why us??”, Amber protests.

“……oh come on little ones…”, this time is aunty Liu.

“Yo little ones”, Hae oppa adds meanwhile Jessica unnie just giggles, so does Jonghyun oppa.

I steal a glance to Amber, she rolls her eyes.

I know she just doesn’t want to be with me, who does she think she is?? She really pisses me off.

“Let me do it myself”, I say while getting up. I start to clean the dishes from the dining table.

“See? Our little one is so lazy, the little Liu is …. Ugh..”, I hear aunty Liu says.

“She doesn’t even bother to help the little Jung”, uncle Liu adds.

“Aisshh… fine…”, Amber suddenly snatches the dishes from me, “let me bring them to the kitchen”

***       

Amber POV

My parents are so mean. They ordered me and Krystal to wash the dishes. First; I really hate washing dishes, second; they made me facing Krystal just like now.

We haven’t spoken any single word. Krystal is washing the plates and stuffs and I’m rinsing them. I keep bowing my head, well I don’t wanna see her face, it’s not because I hate her, hating her is so impossible for me. I jut can’t see her face, don’t ask why… I just can’t…

I know that maybe she feels irritated with my attitude lately. Just like Jessica nuna said, she thought I just played with her feeling, she thought that me and Nicole are back together. I know she really hates me and it’s all my fault.

Aish…… no time for being gloomy, well…… I have no choice right? I never want to do this, I never want to ignore her, I never want to make her sad, but the situation forces me to do this.

“Ah!”

I look up as I hear Krystal yells. She throws down a knife and I can see blood is flowing from her index finger.

Without words I grab her index finger and put it into my mouth. My mom often did this to me when I got cut on my finger when I was kid. She said the saliva is good to stop the blood flowing.

Our eyes accidentally meet. We stare at each other awkwardly.

“Uhh…”, I remove her finger from my mouth, “I’m sorry…… I just…..needed to stop the blood”, I’m trying my best to speak, “you… you can wash your finger then wrap it with band aid”

Krystal keeps bowing her head.

God, this is so awkward here.

“Kids… what happened?”

I turn my head and I find my mom is walking toward us.

“Krystal got cut on her finger, mom”

My mom looks at Krystal, “are you okay dear?”

“No. She needs band aid to cover the wound”

“Amber is right. But it’s good your blood isn’t flowing anymore. You know I usually use saliva to stop the blood”, my mom chuckles.

I and Krystal glance at each other awkwardly, then we look away.

“Come on, I’ll cover your wound with band aid”

“But…”, Krystal finally speaks, “the dishes…”

“It’s fine. You can’t wash with the wound on your finger”, I say while turning my body and start to rinse the dishes again.

***       

Krystal POV

I was washing a knife, and accidentally the knife cut my finger. It was so hurt and I yelled, but suddenly Amber grabbed my finger and put it into , she……… she my finger… gently. I know she wanted to stop the blood. I thought she didn’t care about me anymore, I thought she would ignore me, but I could feel that she was worrying me……..wasn’t she?

She makes me confused. I have no idea what’s in her mind? Does she still care about me? But why…….. why she ignored me….and why she hugged her ex-girlfriend?

“Done”, aunty Liu said, she just finished covering my wound with band aid. We are in Amber’s room because yeah, Amber has many band aids. Don’t know, she just loves collecting them.

“Ladies”, I see my mother was standing by the door, “we’re having fun in the living room. Come and join us, okay?”

***       

Aunty Liu and I are already in Liu’s living room. Just like my mother said, Liu and Jung family are having fun. Hae Oppa, my dad, and Uncle Liu are playing card while joking, meanwhile Jessica unnie, my mother, and Jonghyun oppa are just watching them and sometimes giggling. Amber is here too, she’s standing next to Jonghyun oppa, seems like she’s enjoying nothing.

I notice Amber looks up to me, and then she takes a glance to my index finger. I think she wants to make sure that my finger is already covered or not.

Suddenly Jonghyun oppa calls Amber, he then whispering something to her. Maybe Jonghyun oppa needs Amber’s help to do something.

Amber smiles while nods to Jonghyun oppa. Somehow I see something weird with her smile. Amber walks to Dong Hae oppa, she also whispers something to him then.

“Okay”, Dong Hae oppa says to Amber, “Uhh… guys… we need your attention. Our Jjong wants to say something”

Everybody stops their activity and pay attention to Jonghyun oppa. But it makes me confused when I see Amber walks away instead of being here with us. I mean…… her brother wants to tell something so she is supposed to be here right?

“I’m so happy right now. I can feel my home again, with my beloved family, and Jung family of course. I love you guys, thank you for giving me such happiness”, Jonghyun oppa starts to speak, “I think here is better than in hospital, I feel so much better here, I think I need you guys more than the doctors”, he chuckles, “thank you, thank you, and I love you all”

Jonghyun oppa smiles with all his heart. Aunty Liu approaches him, and hugs her son tightly.

“But Mom, I have something to tell again”, Jonghyun oppa says.

Aunty Liu furrows her brows, so do the others.

“It’s……….. it’s ……….. something that I really really want to tell. I feel like I can’t hold this anymore, and in this very moment…. I think…. I think it’s good for me to…”

“Hey son……. What makes you so shy…… what is it? Come on spill it out”, aunty Liu becomes impatient.

Jonghyun laughes. He covers his face with his hand for a moment. I can see his face becomes reddish.

I’m wondering what’s he going to say.

“Uhh…… Mom……….. Dad……….. Uncle and Aunty Jung………. I …….. I like………. I like Krystal”

………………………………………. Okay……………… I think I was deaf. No, it can’t be……

“Krystal Jung”, Jonghyun oppa says my name, he looks at me in the eyes, “I like you Krystal Jung”

It can’t be…… it’s a lie right?

“Oppa…… stop joking…”, I try to smile and act like what just he said is a joke.

“Jjong-ah! Are you serious?!”, Hae Oppa even looks shocked.

“……Son…… are you…. are you really confessing the little Jung??”, it’s aunty Jung.

I hope Jonghyun oppa will say that he’s just joking, he’s not serious, please please pretty please…

“I’m serious hyung, Mom. I like Krystal, I really do. I know we rarely interacted when were kids, I wasn’t really close with Krystal, I didn’t realize that she’s such a beauty. But when I got back to Korea, I realized that Krystal’s really beautiful, every time I see her I feel like my heart jumping. She often visited me in hospital with Amber, everyday, and………. My feeling is getting clearer….. I like Krystal Jung. I feel so happy every time I see you, Krystal”

My body becomes so weak. I can’t believe this, I still can’t believe this.

“…… I really didn’t expect this but……”, I know it’s my dad’s voice, “yeah… our little Jung is now a young lady…… so yeah……. How is it Krystal?  I think Jung and Liu born to be a family”

I don’t know when my mom approached me, but now she’s standing next to me and embracing her arms around my shoulders, “Seems like our little Jung is still in shock”

I look at my mom and smile bitterly.

“Give her time, okay Jjong?”, it’s uncle Liu says to his son.

“…….uhh…….. I’m sorry Krystal…. I know it’s so suddenly……. you……you can take your time to think about…..this”, Jonghyun oppa looks shy and awkward.

Seriously, I ……. I still can’t believe this, or….. I won’t believe this?

It snaps me when suddenly Jessica unnie stands up.

“I…… I need to go to toilet”, she says before leaving.

Wait! Her voice sounds weird…… seems like…… she’s……..crying? Is Jessie unnie crying?! Why?!

“I wanna go to the toilet too”, I say and immediately run after Jessica unnie.

“Unnie! Wait!”, I call Jessica unnie.

She stops walking, but she doesn’t turn to me. I approach her impatiently. I notice that her shoulders are trembling. She’s definitely crying.

“Unnie!”, I hold unnie’s shoulders and make her turn tome, just like I expected, unnie’s eyes are swollen and teary.

“Why are you crying unnie? Where are you going? You aren’t just going to toilet are you?”

Unnie stares me in the eyes, “……..yes, I’m not going to the toilet….. I’m……. I’m looking for……………………..Amber”

My heart stops beating when I hear her name. Amber…….. Amber…… she ignored me all of sudden…… she keeps avoiding me…… with no reason….. I thought she has no reason….. and she went out when Jonghyun oppa was about to say something.

Did she know?

Is this the reason why she keeps ignoring me?

Does she sacrifice her self……to her ill brother?

Why didn’t she tell me?

“Where is Amber, unnie?! Did you know about this?? Tell me unnie!! Did you know the reason why Amber ignoring me?!!”

Unnie doesn’t answer, she’s just sobbing.

“……….why unnie…….. why didn’t you tell me……….”, I start to cry….. my chest feels so painful.

Unnie hugs me, and I let out my crying on my unnie’s shoulder.

Unnie breaks the hug, she wipes my tears afterward.

“Go find her sist.. she needs you. But…… I don’t know where she is”

“I know……………………………….. I know where she is”

***       

Amber POV

Finally Jjong hyung has courage to confess his feeling for Krystal. He even planned to confess her in front of our families. I forced a smile when he told me that he’s ready to do it. But I’m not ready. So here I am, hiding in Jung family’s backyard. When I was little, every time my parents got angry or every time I felt sad and mad, I would climb the wall and jump into Jung family’s backyard. Jung family’s backyard is really big. There are some big trees here, and I’m hiding among them. Usually no one could find me every time I hid here, no one……… but her.

I’m such a crybaby. Why can’t I stop crying? Why you hurt so much, chest? Isn’t this what you want Amber? Yeah……… I want my brother to feel the happiness, I want him to get better, I want him to stay alive. But……. If this what you want, why are you crying right now, Amber Liu?

I keep crying and sobbing because I can’t hold this, the pain in my chest, until suddenly I feel a pair of arms wrapped around my waist. It makes me shocked, and makes me feel the warmth. I know this scent, but……….. could it be her?

Now I hear someone that is hugging me from behind is sobbing. Even though she’s just sobbing, but I recognize her voice. I still can’t believe if it’s really her, so I put my hand on hers. She tightens her arms around me, she’s still sobbing.

“………why…….. why didn’t you tell me…….. why are you so stupid Amber…….”

“……………… Krys……………………”