Today was a different scenario. I avert my eyes from your direction and I did not let my eyes linger on you even for a moment. I don’t know what took over me. It was a complete turnaround from the usual where I boldly stared at you for several minutes without fail. In the past, I kept looking for your blonde hair whenever you disappeared from my field of view and I made sure to follow you with my stare each time you left. It was somewhat creepy, but it was the only thing I could do. However, this time, I completely and overtly ignored you.

I don’t know if you noticed it since you never even threw me a glance before. I just went through the night enjoying myself with my own company and consuming food and drinks. Until the time came for us to bid everyone goodbye. I waved at a general direction and avoided anyone’s eyes. I didn’t mean to be rude. I just didn’t want to catch your eye and be left in an awkward moment with you. You were bidding goodbye to one of my acquaintances and you seemed to know her. You kept on waving but I did not look in your direction for fear of being accused of butting in. I felt incredulous with our brief goodbyes. I thought our departure wasn’t well addressed and I was unsure whether I bid them goodbye properly. Still, I left and just went home.

Upon my arrival, I couldn’t help the guilt gnawing at my insides. It was burning more than the alcohol I consumed and I couldn’t help but regret my actions. I still am clueless as to how I could alter the events and make the situation better, but I still hope I did not do what I did, whatever it was.

A/N: Sorry if this seems like pure nonsense. Comments are appreciated.