He's really gonna leave me. Why? He can't just leave me alone! He helped me discover who I truly am! He loved me, even when I didn't love him. Well, I did love him, I just didn't want to admit. I mean, it's kinda difficult when you find out you're gay, right?! But he helped me! And he always will help me.
He promised me to stay with me as long as he would live.

-----------FLASHBACK-----------

"Hyung?"
"Yeah..."
"Remember when someone asked you with which kind of people you would fall in love, which looks you liked on a person and when they asked you if you were gay, cause they thought you were? And how you said you would fall in love with the person, not with the looks or the gender? How you said it could be possible that you would fall in love with a guy, if you liked his personality and stuff? You remember that?"    
Jiyong nodded, as a sign that I just should ask what I wanted to ask.
"And do you remember how everyone thought that theory was bull, how even I thought that?! Well, I think I kinda made up my mind about that. After that I've been thinking about it for a while and it seemed more logical every time I repeated it in my mind and--"
"And you're trying to say that you're in love with a guy. And you're not only telling me that cause you know I'll understand, there is another reason behind it. And yeah. I love you too. And I'll always stay with you."
Then his soft lips kissed mine. My first kiss. Damn. It's awesome.
"Seungri-ah, I'll stay with you until I die! I promise! I would love to promise you that I'll stay with you until you die, but what if I die before you! Then I would have to break my promise. And I don't want to lie to you!" He giggled cutely when he said that. Just like a little kid, making such an impossible promise.
Then, I finally got a chance to say something again.
"Eh.. wow, you really know me right?! And now you can't break that promise anymore! You know that right?!"
"I promise I won't break the promise Seung ri. PINKY SWEAR" He told me, yelling the last part.

----------------End Flashback--------------

He kept his stupid promise. Damn it. Like he knew he would die before me.

After that moment, when he promised me that, we shared many kisses. Many more then only that one, at that moment. Much more passionate kisses after that. Kisses on places I couldn't think it would be so nice to be kissed there, until it really happened. And damn, the kisses on those places... I don't think there is anything better then to be kissed by the one you truly love. I love him.

I walk in his room. Such a stupid white hospital-room. He lays there in his big bed. Suddenly looking very little himself. He opens his eyes as he hears someone walking in the room.
"Seung ri-ah~ I am not really sick right? The doctors are making all kinds if stupid jokes right? I don't want to leave you! I don't want to break my promise Seug ri! I don't want to leave you here alone on this stupid planet. I don't want to go to heaven or hell or whatever I'll go to without you! I don’t want to go. I promised you!” He says. While saying this, he starts to cry, really, really hard.
“Jiyong, you know you are. I can’t help it. How much I wish the stupid doctors were just joking! I love you so much. And you won’t break your promise babe, you know that.”
He starts crying even harder.
“I can cry as hard as I want right?! I can cry my whole heart out, I won’t need it when I’m dead anyway! Right?”
“You can’t break your promise. You promised to stay with my until you would die. And you will. I will. I will stay with you, forever. I love you Jiyong. I love you forever. And no, you can’t cry your whole heart out You don’t have your heart anymore. You lost it, at the moment you told me you loved me. I will always carry your heart with me, I will take it everywhere, just like I did since the moment you told me you loved me. ”
He closes his beautiful, dark brown eyes.
“I still love you Seung ri. Thanks for taking my heart with you.” He whispers
“I love you too Jiyong, I love you too.” I tell him, but I don’t think he heard it anymore. He is no more. He’s gone.
I scream harder then I ever screamed before. I feel more down then I ever felt before. I am gonna miss him, more then I ever missed someone before. I love him, more then I ever loved him before.
I stand up from the chair next to his big white bed, give him a peck on his cheek, his nose and then on his lips, which are still as soft as they were the first time they touched my lips. I take a last look at my love and walk out of the room, taking his heart with me, into the world. The feeling of still having his heart with me, makes it a little easier to leave him here, in this stupid, white hospital room.

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Hey :).. Well.. hope you liked it!
Sorry for the shortness & my bad English xD

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