Its 2am in the morning and I’m still wide awake . Not because I’m not tired . In fact , I’m very exhausted . Its just this negative thoughts keeps on repeating in my head like a broken recorder .

He’s avoiding me . My boyfriend , Jung Daehyun is avoiding me . Why ? Did I do something wrong ? Something that made him avoid me ? I sigh as I sit up from my bed . I ruffle my hair in frustration and grab my phone to check if there’s any text messages . None . No more ‘goodnight’ text . No more ‘love you’ text . I got up the bed and head to the kitchen . I grab a drink and gulp in one go .

 

‘I have to .. I have to go and talk to him ..’

I thought to myself before walking back to the bedroom and went to bed .

 

---

 

“Daehyun-oppa . Why are you acting like this ?”

“Cause .. You’re no one to me … No one .. No one ..”

 

I jolt up from bed , making me stumble and fall to the cold-icy floor . ‘Its just a dream .’ I groan in pain as I look at the clock at the wall . 9am . I stood up and head to the window . Unconciously , a tear slip down . I grab my phone and dial his number .

 

“Yeoboseoyo ?”

“Daehyun-oppa .”

“Oh ___________ - ah . Wae ?”

“Can we meet ? Now ?”

“… I’m kinda busy .”

“Please . Just for a minute .”

“Fine . Usual place .”

 

I hung up . His voice sounds so , uninterested anymore . I walk to the bathroom and wash up . I put on some casual outfits , some natural colour make up and left . I walk to the our usual place , the park . Where we first met , where we first started everything .. And probably , where we’ll end ‘us’ .

From a distance , I see him tapping his feet impatiently . I breath in a huge amount of air and walk to him .  He walk towards me when he saw me . Not smiling .

 

“Yah ! Why are you so late ? You know I’m busy !”

“Busy to even spent a day with your girlfriend ?”

“What are you saying ? I told you I’m busy ..”

“Busy with what ?”

“A-a lot—“

“Why do I feel like you’re avoiding me ?”

 

I ask him as hot tears started to form in my eyes . He looks surprised . Of course , who wouldn’t , when a weak and timid girl like me speaks up at her own boyfriend for the first time .

 

“Stop being ridiculous _______ .”

“Me ? Ridiculous ? Where were you yesterday morning?”

“I was at the gym of course !”

“I was there … To ask you to join me for breakfast .. But you weren’t there ..”

“…”

“Are you … C-cheating on me ?”

“B-bwoh ?! A-aniyo . “

 

He’s stuttering . I know it . He’s lying . He’ll stutter when he’s lying . His obviously hiding something from me .

 

“Then why are you stuttering ?”

“I am not !”

“I’m sick .. And tired of all this lies Jung Daehyun . Everyday , I would ask you out .. But you would turn me down with your ‘I’m busy’ excuse .. You woudn’t even send me those text messages anymore . I even went to your dorm . Your housemate HyunWoo said you went out ---”

“I was busy !”

“To the movies …”

“…”

“… Lets end this Daehyun ..”

 

His looks at me , regret written all over him . Tears are already rolling down my face like a waterfall , wetting my cheeks . He grab my hand pulling me closer . I yank it away and take a step back .

 

“Give me a chance .”

“I give you too much chances .. Too much . Thanks for all those sweet memories you had given me . I wish … I wish we could last longer .. But , I was wrong right ?”

 

I flash a fake smile as I look at my fingers . I pull the ring that was at my fingers the whole time and pass it back to him .

 

“Remember when you gave me this promise-ring ?”

“… __________ please .”

“You said you would stay by my side no matter what … You’re a liar .”

“No .. “

“Goodbye Daehyun ..”

 

And with that , I turn around and walk away . I wipe away those tears . I did it . I finally let it out . It hurts . Of course , It’ll still hurts , but at least I let it all out right ? It feels better . Better than holding it in .

 

I turn around once more . He’s gone . I sigh and was about to walk when I bump into a figure . I look up at the figure when my eyes widen . Its him . His face covered with tears . I walk pass him when a hand grab my wrist . I look up , meeting his eyes .

 

“Let me go ..”

 “Not if you listen to me .”

 

I was taken aback . His voice , full of sadness . I try to yank my hand away but not this time . His using his full strength . I wince in pain when he tighten his grip on my wrist .

 

“I know it hurts . But please listen to me …”

“….”

“I was really busy … “

“With what Daehyun ? With what ?”

“I got accepted to TS Entertainment ..”

“.. W-why didn’t you tell me …”

“Its not the right time . I wanted to tell you . But I was busy with all the schedules . That time when you were searching for me at the gym , I was there … But then I got called from the company to go there . When I told HyunWoo I went to the movies , I wasn’t really at the movies . I was practicing for debut ..  HyunWoo doesn’t know anything about this . No one really knows .. Only my parents .”

 “But why won’t you tell me ?”

“… Idols aren’t suppose to date … I don’t know how to tell you .. But at the same time , I don’t wanna lose you .. “

“… But , we can’t date .”

“Of course we can .. Secretly .. “

“B-but .. I don’t wanna be a burden to you when they caught us dating .”

“No you’re never gonna be a burden to me .. For now please .. I'm tired .. And I miss you .”

 

With that , he pull me in for a tight-warm embrace . This embrace that I’ve been longing for . I snuggle into his chest and tighten the hug . I look up , meeting his eyes .

 

“Promise me you won’t lie to me anymore ?”

He pull away , slip in the ring I return him a few moments ago into my fingers and pecks me on the cheeks .

 

“I promise .”