Going into this party, there had been so much inner turmoil within Changmin that he felt as if he could choke on it. It was honestly driving him to the edge of insanity as well as his closest friends too. They knew every single detail and had even given the man advice in this situation but nothing had worked. Everything. He felt like he had done everything he possibly could short of throwing himself at Yunho for the man to get it. Changmin quite honestly didn’t get why he was so blinded to his obvious feelings.

Changmin stared at Yunho across the room chatting idly with a few other party goers and he just…

“If you grip that glass any tighter you’re going to end your night at the hospital picking glass out of your hand.” Kyuhyun interrupted Changmin’s thoughts. Changmin threw back the remainder of the wine and sat the glass down beside of them quickly. His eyes once more returned back to Yunho as he laughed at something that Jonghyun had said.

“I just don’t understand him. I don’t understand how he can be just…ignoring everything that I’m doing like it’s completely normal.” Changmin threw his hands up in the air just before Minho handed him his glass back now filled once more with wine.

“Perhaps you should take a few deep breathes.” Minho said trying his best help but only earned him a glare from Changmin before he drank deeply from his glass. “Or you won’t…” the younger of the three trailed off sounding every bit as exasperated as he was. “Just tell him how you feel. Be direct since the hints that you have been dropping for months haven’t worked.”

“And this has worked so well with a certain younger person that you’re over the moon for?” came the all too quick reply making Minho color.

“That’s different and you know it.” Minho simply said quietly before moving to mingle into the crowd of his company mates.

“That was a little harsh, don’t you think?” Kyu merely said as he held his eyes firmly on Changmin’s face but held no judgement in his expression. It was unfair how Kyu could do that, say something and make him realize that he was being an . If anyone could put Changmin into his place or call him out when he was wrong, it was Kyuhyun. Sometimes Kyuhyun was the only person that could reach him and it was clear that he needed to calm down a bit. He hadn’t meant to hurt his friend but he was so hurt himself that all he could seemingly do was lash out.

“I didn’t…” he started to only be cut off again.

“Yes, you did. You’re cranky and irritable and you want everyone else to be just as cranky and irritable as you are. Minho is right, you need to just tell him exactly how you feel, comfortable with doing that or not. Nothing else is working. Talk to him before you push everyone away that loves you.” Kyuhyun advised before moving through the crowd toward Siwon.

Changmin sulked for a while longer as he finished his glass of wine. Kyuhyun was right and no amount of staring and wishing that Yunho would wake up was going to do any good. Changmin filled his glass and moved off toward Minho to make amends. He was determined that he wasn’t going to carry on with his current mood and instead be happy and enjoy himself.

~*~

Yunho almost felt sorry for Siwon while he carried Changmin into their shared house. If Changmin was this drunk, he could only imagine what Siwon was dealing with at Super Junior’s dorm. Yunho had watched him helping Kyuhyun out the front door a little while before Yunho had managed to talk Changmin into going home. Kyu and Changmin were both a handful so he said a quick prayer for the other man as he worked on getting Changmin's coat somewhat on.

Changmin usually didn’t like these things and yet it was like pulling teeth to get the man to leave. The ride home had been just as eventful as Yunho had to stop several times just to make sure that Changmin didn’t actually puke on himself, Yunho or in the car. It had been a close call a few times but he had managed to keep everyone somewhat clean. He wished he could say the same for Changmin’s breath as he kept saying over and over just how much he didn’t understand Yunho. Yunho was confused but didn’t question him just yet. Perhaps after he managed to get Changmin to brush his teeth.

That was easier said than done as well as the man kept telling him that his mouth was perfectly fresh and would be fine for the night. All Changmin seemed to want to do was lay down. Once Yunho threatened that all of his teeth were going to fall out from the odor, that seemed to work and the man brushed his teeth before Yunho worked on getting him to his bedroom again.

It was then that the walls seemed to crumble and all the questions that Yunho had were mostly answered. Of course it left him with new questions but that was beside the point. Yunho got what he had been wishing for, for over an hour.

“Why do people have to always say that they love someone to get them to understand it? They…they say… Everyone says that they love this and that and in the next moment they’re proving otherwise. It’s maddening. It’s so easy…to say it but it’s so overused and I hate it. I hate talking about feelings… Especially when all the words have lost their meaning. Why can’t people see it in actions? In the way that…that they look at someone.” Changmin went on as Yunho managed to get him out of his shirt all while Changmin threw his arms about. "Or...or the things that do...period. It's not right to have to say words that have become empty and without real meaning."

Once Yunho got Changmin’s shirt off, it was then that he had Changmin’s fingers curled into his own shirt pulling him dangerously close to Changmin. “Why are you so blind? I care about you and you’re so blind to it. I refuse to tell you. Words are nothing. I hate talking about how I feel. You know I hate it. I hate it, Yunho. Everyone insists that I talk about it and I won’t. I won’t do it. I  won’t do it… I’ve been here all this time. Always beside you and never… I didn’t leave. I’m right here. I care…” Changmin trailed off as his hands loosened up on Yunho’s shirt. The more that he spoke, the more deeply he fell into an alcohol induced sleep.

Yunho gingerly removed Changmin’s fingers from his shirt enough so that he could pull back fully from him.  He didn’t get what brought on this sudden outburst. Then again, perhaps it was just Changmin with a little too much to drink. Yunho shrugged it off as he moved from the room long enough for him to go take a shower and change into his own night clothes. There was no way that he was going to leave the other man in his room alone with as much as he had drank. Yunho wanted to be right there should Changmin need him to be.

It took a while for Yunho to fall asleep as he couldn’t keep from thinking about what Changmin said. There was a lot about the speech that he took away from it. Yunho was sure that he would do whatever he could in the future to make sure that Changmin didn’t have to answer those questions. If he had to make jokes or so to keep Changmin from having to take about feelings or things that seemed too personal, Yunho would do it.

The part that plagued him was Changmin’s overwhelming need to tell Yunho in not so many words that he cared and was right there. Yunho knew that. Perhaps Yunho had been too wrapped up in the fact that it was just the two of them about to comeback now? Perhaps Yunho needed to show Changmin that he appreciated him? These were the thoughts that ran through Yunho’s mind as he drifted off to sleep.

~*~

Something was weird and completely off about Yunho. Changmin looked at the other man completely confused even if he tried to hide it with the interviewer clearly eating out of Yunho's hand. The man was such a dork but it wasn't that part that had him confused. Yunho had never once drawn attention away from him the way that Yunho clearly was today. Every show that they recorded together it seemed like Yunho just kept taking the heat off of him. Changmin appreciated it and but he didn't understand what was going on.

Yunho mere winked at him when no one else was looking. It was then that he thought that maybe, just maybe he was getting through to the man. Except an hour later he found out that he really hadn't at all. Yunho still treated him like a little brother and nothing more. Maddening. Yunho was maddening.

Changmin remained quite as he looked out the window on the ride back to their shared home. He smiled to himself as he started to put together a plan that involved him being save for a towel that kept slipping. Perhaps then Yunho would get it that he wanted more from him. Perhaps then Yunho would pounce him finally.

~*~

Changmin's hair was still wet as he threw the towel he had been 'wearing' at the bed. Yunho officially and really would never get it. How could he have turned around and pretty much fled. Dammit! He wasn't suppose to do that. Changmin gave up. He wasn't going to plot or plan any longer. He would just have  to give Yunho up.

He sighed deeply as he plopped down onto his bed, folding the towel when he couldn't stand to look at it laying there. He couldn't give up and he knew it. He loved and wanted Yunho too much for that. He just didn't know what else to do in order to make the man see that, to make him come to the conclusion on his own. Changmin had to go back to the drawing board yet again. Yes, he would come up with something else.  Something that would work.

~*~

When it came down to it, Changmin couldn't keep from chuckling as he looked over at Yunho now. A still slightly damp, , sleeping Yunho whom was totally and completely spent from all of the they had been having in the past few hours.

Changmin was tired too but there was still a good part of him that was completely wired. It amazed him what all had happened and transpired since the older man had walked in on him pleasuring himself. For a moment he had been a bit freaked out and worried about how Yunho was going to react. It turned out that he was worried for no reason at all and now things had changed. Things had changed completely and totally in awesome ways.

Leaning down, Changmin pressed a few kisses along Yunho's neck all the way up this lips all while his hands moved down Yunho's body and under the covers. Once he felt Yunho react, it was then that he deepened the kiss.

"Again?" Yunho asked sleepy but clearly slightly amused when they parted for breath.

"Hell, yes again." Changmin merely said as he went back again again for more. "You have a lot of time to make up to me."

He heard as well as felt Yunho groaning into the kiss, just before Changmin felt himself being pushed over onto his back. "My turn." Changmin heard him say as he started to kiss down Changmin's body.

He could live with that...