Johns POV

Well i just woke up inside a cryo tube on the UNSC friggit 'The Pillar Of Autumn' . All of my team mates are complete and utter tards. I'm just glad there arent any ODSTs, if there were i would have committed suicide several times by now. Anyway, back to the matter at hand. I got out of the cryo tube  and a marine told me to switch my looking pitch and to test my shields. One of the alarms whent off and captain Keys' voice came through a loud speaker saying "This is bridge to cryo two, send the Master Chief to the bridge immediately." Then the discruntled looking marine said "But sir, we would have to skip the weapons diagnostic..." He was cut off there by Captain Keys who didn't sound happy, he started to talk to the marine in what i think qualifies as an angy voice. "On the double Crowman!" The marine, being an insufferable coward timidly agrred to the captain's orders. He tured around and said to me "Skipper seems jumpy, better get down there quick." Oh yeh by the way by this time the Covenant had proberbly attacked and these god aweful marines were yacking on about nothing in particular like a couple of hyenas fighting over a baby and not bothering to update me on the position of the Covenant forces.

As if on cue, there was a loud explosion.One of the marines let out an over dramatic screem"Oh god there trying to get throgh the door!" As the Covenant blasted throgh the door the marine got shot in the haed, remind me to send the Covenant a thank you letter. Then the other blasted marine yelled "Sam, Sam, come on we gotta get the hell outta here!" I reluctantly followed the flaling marine down a corridoor. Unfortunately the door at the end was locked. The marine was all like "Come on! We gotta get through this door!" It was blaitantly locked of course and i was like "Dude, can't you see that door is locked and theres a burst gas pipe next to you. If my shield come anywhere near that stuff we'll both be blown to kingdom come!" Of cours he didn't hear me over his girlish shrieks. If only a sarcastic expression could be portrayed through this blasted helmet. I decided it wasn't worth trying to pry him off the door and retreated back down the hallway. I jumped over a couple of crates and headed down the adjacent corridoor. All of a sudden i heard the flick of  cigarette lighter followed by a bang and a high pitched squeel. I wish i had a gun so i could put the rest of these brain-dead marines out of their misery.

I walked down the corridoor and came across this room with a group of marines fighting off some covies. One of the maries came up to me apon notising my existance and said "The captain's waiting, better follow me." I trailed this marine who was at least half way to being slightly intelligent. As i followed closely behind him we whent down at least five more networks of hall ways. Who the hell built this place? Daedalus? It's like a freaking labrynth up here, i mean how many corridoors do they need?

As i came up to the bridge i was slightly breathless from the prolonged journey through that ridiculous maze of tunnels. I walked over to the captain and he told me "Master Chief, take this A.I. Cortana, make sure that she dosen't fall into covenant hands." What am i a babysitter? Then he passed me a pistol and said "I don't keep it loaded son, you'll have to find ammo as you go." So i abruptly pointed the pistol at his face and pulled the trigger, as his lifelewss form fell to the floor with a splat of blood i chuckled inwardly and thought "Unloaded my ." A marine saw the dead captain and shrieked "Oh no, the captain is dead!" As the next explosion struck, i quickly shot a whole through the window making it look like he was killed by a covie attacker. I placed my gaze back on the hysterical marine who said "Covie scum, must have shot him through the window!" I thought to myslef 'What a tard, i can't believe he fell for that, expecially when  there was no plasma scorching and the whole appeared after he hit the floor.'

As i walked out of the bridge chuckling to myself i spotted three grunts heading in my direction. I shot them all with one bullet, those idiots had actually lined up one behind the other like dominos. I got mad skill, i'm like Chuck Norris, a ninja Chuck Norris! I sprinted through yet another corridorr killing coenant forces all the way, as i neared the middle of the ship i saw this elite behind a plasma shield that was completely see through, yet he failed to spot me. I was right infront of him, until i whent behind the plasma shield... then he saw me. I killed him as quickly as i could and ran towards the nearest escape pod.

I jumped inside the escape pod and was jettisoned in to space, unfortunately i got caught in the gravitational pull of this strange ring world. Before i knew it i was plummiting towards the surface. I sighed frustratedly and cursed as many marines as possible, like i can be bothered to remember all their names. I was quite surprised at how quiet my newly accuired A.I. had been for this entire time. she haddn't said a word, maybe she saw me kill Keys, oh well atleat she isn't nagging me to death. I sure hope that lasts, she's the quietest woman i've ever met. I must say things are looking pretty good, even if i am about to crash into the face of this blasted ring world...