Kame’s neighbourhood did not offer him the things a kid should be learning in a community. Instead, he grew up in a very violent environment, teaching him to never trust anyone even his own friends.

That’s when Mrs. Kamenashi decides for them to move away from that place. Mr. Kamenashi died a long time ago and Mrs. Kamenashi is raising little Kame by her own.

“little kazu, do you want to go away from this place?” he asked his son who nodded vigorously as another shout was heard from outside.

Little Kame thinks that the place is hell and would do everything to get away from there.

“since my beloved turtle wants to be away from here, we would be moving away from here and we would be moving to a place somewhere you can play outside and enjoy the sun,” the woman smiled at him before she took his hand and left with him.

 

Three years later

 

Kame could be seen outside playing so much with his best friend jin. Little jin was 8 while little Kame was 6. They play a lot. Like Kame, little jin moved there with his mother and father three years ago. It’s not because though of a really hellish place. Jin’s parents are cousins and jin was a result of a forbidden relationship. To prevent anymore discussion about the matter, the family decided to move away and found this place perfect for them to live like a normal family they want to be.

“jinjin!” Kame screamed as jin tickled him non-stop causing him to run out of breath and cry while laughing.

“stop! Jinjin!”  Kame screamed as jin still continued with tickling him before they fell off from Kame’s bed. Kame landed on top of jin while jin served his cushion in the mean time Kame was catching his breath.

“ne, kazu, are you okay?” jin asked the other, catching his own breath.

“I am. You just tickled me a lot,” Kame spoke, laying his head on jin’s head, hearing his heart beat.

“ne, jinjin, I can hear your heart!” Kame spoke in delight as he made his head comfortable on his chest.

-

Dear diary,

I heard jin’s heart!

Jinjin was tickling me and then we fell and then I heard his heart when I laid my ears on his chest. It was beating fast like his breathing. We talked about his heart until mama called us to eat snacks. Mama said that snacks are good for kid like us.

She gave us cookies and a glass of milk each. Mama’s cookies are the best!

Then, we came over to jinjin’s house to eat dinner with them. Maybe tomorrow night, they will come over to eat with us.

Good night diary. I will be going with jin to school tomorrow. I am excited! First day of school!

-

Kame was shaking. He was scared. He held onto jin tightly as they walked towards the room. He can remember well the palce where he came from and the chaos inside the room was more like that place than where he is right now with jin.

“don’t be scared kazu. They are nice. They would not hurt you,” jin tried soothing the tears that escaped Kame’s innocent eyes. But Kame just won’t let go.

Mrs. Akanishi saw this. He can understand this. Little Kame got a bad experience and trauma is not something that is easy to overcome with.

“it’s okay jin. Go with him,” she spoke to both Jin and Mrs. Kamenashi’s surprise.

“but he’d be late for his class,” she spoke, looking a great deal of worry at jin. Jin, however, beamed at his mother and proceeded inside with Kame, holding the younger’s hand tightly on his.

“well, I understand Kame. Trauma is not something you can forget in a blink of an eye. If jin is the only person who can help him, then let them be together, right? At least in that way, jin can help Kame overcome the tension,” she smiled at the other. Mrs. Kamenashi’s eyes became teary. She was really thankful to meet the akanishis. Maybe without them, Kame would be lonely still.

-

Dear diary,

Jin did not leave me alone in school today. he sat with me in class the whole time and we even met new friends like koki and junno. Junno is really funny and I can’t help but laugh at his jokes. Koki adds up to the fun when he tries to smack his head lightly. May I would be scared of them if not for jin who held my hand tightly with his. I am thankful that his mother did not force him to leave me.

I had fun today and I hope I have fun tomorrow at school too. And then maybe meet some more friends. I like school.

And I pray to God for jin not leave me alone too tomorrow.

Good night diary!

-

“good morning kazu-chan~!” jin beamed at the young one as Kame made his way downstairs to eat breakfast before going to school. Realizing what was happening, Kame beamed and he jumped only to thrown his small body to jin’s bigger one, embracing him tightly.

“are you going with me again to school?” Kame asked, eyes hopeful for a yes.

“yes kazu-chan. Mom said I would be attending the same class as you. Since my old records are burned my past school, I would be attending the same class as you,” jin smiled brightly at him making Kame more happy and jumpy about the idea of going to school with jin every day.

Kame jumped and kissed jin’s cheek many times making jin giggle at the tickling feeling of Kame’s hair on his face.

“ah, you are awake kazu,” his mom smiled seeing the scene in front her.

“mama! Jin is going with me to school every day!” kazu beamed, hugging jin again.

“I know kazu. His mother told me that already earlier as she helped jin on his way here. I am glad,” she smiled as she served breakfast to the two kids who ate happily.

They again met with junno and koki. They ate lunch together and they all went home together.

-

Time passed so easily for the two. They just realized that they are growing up when a girl came up to jin one time on lunch. they are already in high school, both on the same section. It was as if fate was kind to them to never part them for a day.

“jin-chan, please accept this,” the gilr bowed, in front her, a bento box. Jin looked at Kame who’s eyes are both a window to confusion and light hate.

“I’m sorry, but, I am already full and accepting that means I have to eat again,” jin spoke, eyes at kazuya only seeing that the young one relaxed upon his statement. The girl walked away murmuring things jin did not paid attention to. His attention was fully on Kame who paid no attention to him but to his food.

Kame made a bento for him. And jin swear that this is the best lunch he’s had in ages.

“kazu?” jin spoke weakly, measuring how far he can go with the serious Kame.

“hm?” Kame replied, making jin nervous. Kame never replied him a ‘hm?’ unless he’s mad at him.

“sorry,” he spoke, bowing his head. His heart was beating fast and the tension was of no help to calm him down.

“why?” Kame asked, still not looking at him.

“you are mad at me,” jin spoke.

-

Dear diary,

I hate jin.

A lot.

Seriously.

Earlier at lunch, there is this girl that came to offer a bento to jin. I almost stood up and throw away the bento if not for jin’s answer. I know I don’t have to rights to be this angry but I mean, why did she have to do that when i was in front of jin? Don’t she know how to respect best friend’s privacy?

Well, that’s not my point. I know how idiot girls can be. But jin was way too polite with his answer. He should have just harshly said no and walked out. I could have just followed him right after.

But now. He politely smiled at her and said he was sorry and even explained!

I hate him.

Really.

I hope his stomach hurt tonight. I hope mama accidentally put poison in his food causing his tummy to ache.

-

“good morning kazu-chan!” jin greeted the young one as he descended from the stairs. Kame’s face was gloomy upon seeing his face and jin was sure that Kame was still mad at him for yesterday. He shouldn’t have talked with that girl. Really. This would be the last time he would do that.

“what are you doing here?” Kame asked, not even glancing at jin.

“I came to apologize,” jin spoke, offering Kame a turtle plushie. It was the same plushie Kame wanted when they once visited the arcade house. Kame looked up and saw the plushie.

“AH~!” he screamed and all anger forgotten as he went to jin and hugged him and kissed his cheek repeatedly.

“thank you jinjin!” Kame beamed like a kid making jin smile.

“eew kazu. You are so grown up now and you still do that?” his mother came in view and teased the younger one with what he was doing.

“ma, I’ve been doing this like since ever. Are you not used to it yet?” Kame answered, tightening his hold on jin as he shifted his body making him more comfortable in jin’s lap.

“you look like a girl, you know,” his mother continued, placing breakfast on the table. Jin and Kame are in 6^th grade now and they are still attending the same class.

“ma~!” Kame whined, burying his face on the crook of jin’s neck.

“see what I mean?!” his mother winked at jin who laughed softly at this.

“anyways, jin, I entrust you with Kame so don’t go leaving this little girl-I mean boy- alone, are we clear?” she winked at jin, intentionally saying girl instead of boy.

“yes ma,” jin nodded and held Kame to chest closer, inhaling the scent of his shampoo.

“ara ara! We need to rush if we don't want to be late for school,” jin spoke as he guided a spoonful of cereal to Kame’s lips who welcomed the food willingly.

“I can wake up to mornings like this,” Kame spoke absent mindedly as he welcomed another spoonful cereal from jin.

“I am not planning to be a baby sitter you know. I want to be salesman in the future,” jin answered as he smiled softly at him.

-

Dear diary,

I’ll make this one short. We have to hurry. Well, I’ll continue this in school if I got the time.

Well, jin fed me breakfast as he treated me like a baby and it was fun. I can get used to things like that. If only it would not look awkward. Well, nothing is awkward with mom. We can be like little kids again in front her and she would just laugh at us.

Well, that’s for now. I’ll continue at school, okay?

-

Dear diary,

As promised, I will continue the entry earlier.

So yes. Where was i? Yeah. Jin fed me breakfast. Bad thing though. He’s not willing to be hired as my babysitter. I swear I would be a nice little kid if jin’s going to be my baby sitter. I would follow his orders and I would be his little angel. Haha I know how stupid that sounds. But hey! He’s my best friend, right?

Well, he also came with a peace offering for the thing yesterday. A turtle plushie! He remembered the plushie I wanted from the arcade last time and he got it for me! How can I stay mad with Jin when he knows just how make me happy?

So, how do I say this. I think i’ll allow more girls to come to him if he would give me stuff I like every morning. I swear I can live like this forever.

But as they say, nothing is constant in this world.

Ne, diary, what do you think?

BAKA! As if your diary would answer you. Well, till next time, okay?

-

Kame closed his notebook, looking at tat-chan who was talking with jin about a group project they have which is to be passed next week.

“no. I bet that old meanie would just laugh at our work,” jin spoke, seriously thinking before Kame came in and jumped at him from behind.

“Kame! What was that for?!” jin winced in pain before looking at Kame who looked apologetic.

“sorry,” he murmured and looked at jin through big eyes, making him look like a lost little kid who accidentally bumped into a stranger and now asking for apology.

“oh no, kazu. You know that a simple ‘sorry won’t work this time,” jin spoke, eyes narrowing at Kame who looked at him confused before jin pointed his cheek to signal him what he should do.

“gross,” Kame heard tat-chan say as Kame kissed jin repeatedly on his cheek saying sorry in between. Jin’s hands came in contact with his hips making him scream with the contact before jin got the idea of tickling Kame all over.

“stop! Ahh~! Jin stop!” Kame laughed while tat-chan laughed too, enjoying Kame’s flushed face before he helped jin in tickling Kame.

“ahhh~!!! Stop!!! Please stop!!! Ahhhh~!!!” Kame screamed, trying hard to stop the two from tickling him too much.

“that is for jumping at my back,” jin spoke as if a villain laughing at his success.

-

Dear diary,

KILL ME NOW!!!

Jin tickled me at school today after I jumped at his back hurting him in the process. He wanted me to kiss him earning a disgusted face from tat-chan before he tickled me.

And I swear that while he tickling me, our lips met for a moment before tat-chan joined in, pulling me head away from the thought of the kiss.

Well, how about I say what was on the kiss? Yes?

Well, though it was just brief, it was something else than a normal thing I do on his cheek. It sent shivers down my spine and made my heart beat faster. Though I know it might be from the tickles, it was still different. It was warm and it was- I can’t describe it. After the tickling game, I acted as if nothing happened while jin, I am sure, did the same. We talked about a lot of things and then he walked me home and he promised to call me tonight. No one brought up the kiss thing and I was almost relieved. But, I can’t take it off my head.

I tried talking with mom about it but I found it awkward. I mean, imagine your son talking to you about how his lips met his bestfriend’s soft, warm ones. I swear it would a really awkward talk so I decided that I would just write it here since I know you can understand me for some reason making me feelcomfortable to confide in you than mom. Well, maybe tomorrow I would forget it and maybe I would be able to stop this awful thinking of asking jin to kiss me again. After all, it was just an accident. Not counted as a real kiss.

Well, good night diary. And cheer for me, okay? I will face jin tomorrow as if I did not feel it. Trust me. I can pull off a play if I want to.

-

Things had been the same way between jin and Kame. Well, except for the kiss on the cheek thing. After that kiss, Kame stopped kissing jin on the cheek and jin stopped asking for it. Both became sensitive to the topic of kiss and dared not to touch it completely.

Kame woke up to a really awkward one. it was February. jin was inside his room, going through his things.

“what are you doing in my room?” he asked first thing and his mind was directed at the thing in jin’s hand. It was something green but Kame was not able to identify it as jin was successful in hiding it immediately.

“oh. Nothing. I just came to wake you up,” jin smiled awkwardly at him, trying to put the thing on his bag.

“well you did woke me up. why are you even there hiding something from me?” Kame smiled as he made his way to jin who stepped back, finally bumping to the wall, making his trapped between Kame and the wall.

“got something for me?” Kame smiled innocently to jin though his voice sounded really y. Bedroom voice.

“breakfast?” jin smiled still awkwardly at Kame while trying to push the wall as if the wall would move at his will.

“sounds great. Why not just wait for me downstairs then? Why did you have to be here and hide that thing from me?” Kame asked, nearing his face on jin, looking at jin’s bag.

“it was nothing,” jin gulped.

“come on jin. Who are you kidding? I’m old enough to know you are hiding something from me,” Kame smiled, still nearing his face on jin who gulped again.

“...”

“jin...?”

“...”

“jin don’t talk and I’ll make sure you’ll not get out here without being kissed,” Kame threatened, nearing his lips on jin’s and murmuring against them.

“kiss me then,” jin challenged though, mind not present anymore.

And yes. They kissed. It was soft. It was slow and it was caring.

It was nothing like how most got their kiss.

Theirs was not forced. The movements became natural and matching.

And it was beautiful. The flying of butterflies on their stomach was pleasant, adding more passion to the situation. The soft moans making them hot in anticipation, making them excited of what is to come.

Hands finding their rightful places, they went closer to each other, releasing their bodies of the inhibited need trapped deep within their souls for a long time.

It was all simply amazing.

“jin,” Kame panted as he was out of breath from the kiss.

“yes?” jin lovingly answered the young one.

“go down. I’ll be ready in 20 minutes,” Kame panted, talking normally to jin. But it was hard when his eyes were still clouded with the pleasure of the other’s lips, still lingering on his.

“okay,” jin spoke, longing already colouring his eyes as he released the young man from his tight hold, heading for the door.

“don’t take long, okay?” jin smiled softly at Kame who nodded before he made his way downstairs.

“so...? it was a long process to wake him up?” Kame’s mom spoke as jin approached her on the kitchen.

“yes. It was a long process. Your son is a pain in the ,” jin joked, laughing awkwardly at his words.

“you can bet. He’s a drama queen,” she smiled before continuing her doing. Jin walked to the living room, waiting for Kame.

Kame was giggling inside the bathroom, fingers on his lips as he recalls everything that just happened 5 seconds ago. His soft full lips moving against his together with the force of his arms, wrapping him in a loving hug that he’s never felt before.

It was all so overwhelming. All so new to him yet it all felt to be meant to happen even before.

-

Dear diary,

You can bet. I am really happy as if my feet id floating as I walk to cloud nine. It’s all so amazing. My head fells light and all colors are so bright and new to my eyes.

Am I in love with my own best friend?

Wait. Let me think about it.

-

Dear diary,

Imagine. It’s already a month after that kiss and a month since I last had an entry here.

Well, here’s my answer.

POSITIVE.

I’m in love with my best friend. Ang he’s a guy to top it all!

Geez. What is happening with me? yesterday, we went with them to the beach and jin just displayed his gorgeous body to girls who went to talk to him as if I wasn’t there. well, there are also girls who came to me for a talk. I even got to chat with eve. She’s fun. Really. She’s cute too. But my jinjin came in between us, tagging me along when he decided that he wanted to surf.

Surfing is fun by any means. I’ve been surfing with him the past month and I practically know now which wave is good and which is not.

He taught me everything I need to know.

And he’s not telling me anything about the kiss yet.

Well, it’s okay for me. I don’t want to go bother about it because I am embarrassed just thinking how much I liked that kiss and how it opened my eyes to the fact that I love him even before.

I know I’m weird. But don’t you think it’s wonderful? This love.

Well, right now, we are here in a cafe with my two mothers and my dad and my best friend. Dad decided that he wants to eat dinner out and invited us along, telling my two mothers that we will be going to the arcade after to burn the calories.

Ne, diary, what do you think? Should I still continue with love, or should I just set it aside and think that it’s a really friendly affection towards my best friend?

I’ll decide when I’m ready.

-

“Kazu~ you are not eating properly,” jin whined beside Kame after he finished writing before the young one.

“the food hasn’t arrived yet,” Kame answered him, looking at the counter to see if they’re order is ready to be taken to their table.

“no, not that. I mean, you are so skinny I can barely hug a meat in you! Just bones and skin~,” jin underlines his statement by hugging kazuya tightly. The action both sent warm shiver down their spine and butterflies on their stomachs, making their hearts race faster.

“get off me jin! You are just fat that’s why you say those things,” Kame tried struggling with no success. He can’t blush now.

“Kame, jin is right. Comparing you to other kids you age, you look more like a girl with y hips and beautiful face but flat chest,” mrs. Akanishi barged in, making Kame blush successfully.

“mom~!” Kame whined as he looked at the woman who giggled together with his mother and his father.

“she’s right, kazu. You look like a girl~” jin spoke in a childish manner, kissing Kame’s both cheek.

“you fit more to be jin’s girlfriend than best friend when you two are together which is the case,” Kame’s mom added, making the three adult laugh harder now, enjoying the annoyance of the kid.

“I got myself a girlfriend~, I got myself a girlfriend~, I got myself a girlfriend~” jin sing songed as he hug Kame tightly, burying his face on Kame’s hair.

“akanishi jin, I swear. If you don’t stop that, I would never talk to you ever again. Consider me your enemy by then,” Kame spouted childishly at his childish threat.

“okay,” jin pouted as he distanced himself from Kame and sat straight, looking like a sulking kid.

“aww... our little jinny is defeated by his girlfriend,” mr. Akanishi cooed, laughing just right after joining the two woman who was laughing hard.

“dad~! Please don’t tell me that you are joining these two crazy women in teasing us!” Kame complained, heading to the restroom just before their orders came.

Jin followed though, apologizing to Kame as they were inside the rest room.

“yeah right. As if you mean it,” Kame grunted, fixing his collar.

“I mean it kazu. I’m really sorry,” jin spoke as he went closer to Kame, helping the other with his collar.

“liar. You were enjoying it all with them,” Kame pouted more, making him look like an angry 5-year old.

“I was not, kazu. I just played along since I never saw them that happy and I thought that maybe I should just do it so they would enjoy themselves. You should have known that,” jin cooed, hugging Kame from behind. Releasing a surrendering sigh, Kame leaned his head to jin’s chest and closed his eyes.

“feeling better?” jin asked as Kame just hummed in content with their position.

“I’m sorry, okay?” jin again cooed as he kissed the top of Kame’s head.

“I love you kazu,” jin murmured in content as he sighed, releasing the breath he was holding inside.

“I love you too jin,” Kame answered as his heart overjoyed with the words that rolled off jin’s lips. It sounded so true and so sweet. It was the best feeling Kame’s ever had and he was sure he’ll never forget this moment.

-

“love bird’s back! Your pasta is cooling down, jin,” mr. Akanishi beamed at the two as he saw the relaxed atmosphere between his two child.

“aawww... aren’t they sweet?” mrs. Kamenashi cooed, winking at Kame and jin.

-

Dear diary,

If there is something I would really love to hear over and over and over again? It would be jin’s voice while he say he love me. Like earlier in the rest room. It was all so sweet. So careful. So true.

Or is it just me imagining things?

I don’t know. But the way he spoke, it woke up the butterflies in my tummy. It made my heart skip a beat and made my head spinning in happiness I know he did not notice at all.

It made me step into cloud 9 making my head lighter and lighter and full of him. His scent, his voice, the picture of his eyes looking at me as if I’m someone he loves the most.

It was all so dreamy it scares me that I might just wake up to reality of falling and pain and sorrow. I’m scared that with this dream, I would not want to face reality anymore.

Well, diary, be there for me when I fall, okay? Even if this love story hasn’t started yet, catch me if I fall, okay?

Good night diary.

-

FROM: JIN

TO: KAZU

“BC?” “Got time for me?”

 

FROM: KAZU

TO: JIN

“not much. Just prjct 2 finish,” “of course I do,”

 

FROM: JIN

TO: KAZU

“mind f I come over?” “I want to see you~”

 

FROM KAZU:

TO: JIN

“not at ol. But I’m a little occupied w/ prjct so I myt not b able to entertain u, ok?” “I want to see you too~”

 

FROM: JIN

TO: KAZU

“ok. I'm at d door olrdy,” “look out the window,”

 

FROM: KAZU

TO: JIN

“mou~ u shud hve told me ur olrdy der,” “there you are!”

-

Jin was welcomed by the smiling kazu who hugged him briefly before his mother saw the visitor.

“mou~ jin. Tell kazu to rest from doing his project! He’s not eating enough again,” she pouted before looking at Kame then pleadingly at jin. It all took jin a simple request before he glared at Kame, passing his annoyance at the younger’s eating habit.

“fine,” Kame gave up and ate while jin watched him.

-

Dear diary,

Mou~ jin is staying over for the night. His parents are going away for a week for their anniversary leaving jin at our mercy. Mom is happy about this because he said that jin would be able to look after me while she is out doing her work. I know what she means though. No need to look at ne with those eyes warning me I should never strain myself from over doing school stuff. Jin would be here anyways as my baby sitter.

And speaking of, he is in the bathroom right now, taking a shower. After him, I would take shower too before we sleep. He’s sleeping in my room tonight since mom told him to. There would be just the two of us. Will I be able to make it? It would go like this for a week and I’m scared that I might not be able to control myself and do something I would regret my whole life.

Diary! Help me please!

Well, I know jin is done already. The water stopped. A clear sign. Well, diary, keep this a secret, okay? He should never find out my hots for him.

Geez what am I saying?

-

As jin got out of the bath, he saw Kame walking towards him, making him gulp loud.

“anou... the bath room. The water is already warm... and ugh... i... used your towel... and uhm... i... yeah... you’ll just see there inside...” jin slowly spoke, taking in Kame’s face in mind.

“sure. Thanks jin,” Kame smiled and walked past through him making him sigh in relief.

Kame stood inside. Removed his clothes and had the urge to pull jin with him.

No.

He is not going to do that. Never.

He would not do-

“Kame? I guess you forgot this?” jin went inside the bathroom, looking at the figure in front him.

Gasps.

Kame stood motionless as jin just looked at him. Both silent.

Someone has to break this silence or Kame would never be able to continue his bath.

“uhm, here. You forgot your towel,” jin spoke, breaking in the silence between them, moving closer to Kame.

“and yeah. I came to offer my service. Maybe you want me to scrub your back?” jin smiled awkwardly, earning a nod from the younger whose face turned blank after he spoke.

Jin got the sponge and scrubbed Kame’s back. The milky skin felt so irresistible and jin has to fight inner urges to touch it with his bare hand, throwing the sponge somewhere else.

“jin? Are you okay?” Kame spoke as he felt jin slowed down.

“no. I’m okay. No need to worry,” jin spoke, getting back to reality, scrubbing Kame’s back in the normal phase again.

Kame moaned in satisfaction that made jin stiff. Kame stiffened as well realizing what sound he has produced.

“satisfied?” jin asked, voice husky arousing Kame.

“yeah,” Kame answered in the same tone and both just stiffened again. What are they doing? Playing the game of seduction?

“want me to give you a massage too?” jin offered as he placed down the sponge and caressed Kame’s back with his bare hands. Kame moaned in anticipation as jin’s skin came in contact with his.

“sure,” Kame answered finally, sighing in satisfaction as jin massaged his back carefully.

Until jin’s hands travelled to other places.

“jin...”

Jin’s name rolled off Kame’s lips like a moan arousing jin more than he already is.

“do you like it?” jin came closer, whispering the words to Kame’s ear. A shiver crept his spine, making him turn to jin and wrap his arms around the man and kiss him softly.

More moans escaped Kame’s lips. Eagerness pushed them both to their limit of restrain making them both sigh in excitement in exploring the other. Harsher kisses came in next as jin’s hands found Kame’s , massaging the muscle softly.

“jin...” Kame now moaned in anticipation as jin gripped his harder, making twitch between them. He felt jin’s member between them too, making his body more excited than before.

Jin’s lips travelled down Kame’s neck, and biting, leaving a mark at those areas that could be hidden by clothes later on. Kame tasted so sweet. The water made no success in washing Kame’s sweetness that jin craved for more.

Hands travelling down, massaging Kame’s inner thigh making the legs part further, guiding his hand on Kame’s hidden hole.

“jin...”

-

The fingers did a great job in making Kame a mess, hungry for jin.

But as jin guided his length inside him, Kame lost it.

Hissing in pain and pleasure, Kame’s nails dug on jin’s back, making jin hiss too from the pain that added to the pleasure he was feeling. He lifted Kame off the floor, wrapping his skinny legs on his waist, holding all the weight by himself.

Hitting his sweet spot, Kame screamed jin’s name in pleasure, asking him for more. jin complied to the wish and in harder and faster inside Kame. To muffle the sounds, Kame hid his face on the crook of jin’s neck and there he bit his lips but occasionally, he would let out a loud moan. Especially if the pleasure was just too much to handle.

-

Dear diary,

Early, huh? Yeah. Just woke up with jin beside me right now. His snoring on my bed while his arm was around my waist. A good thing I had this diary just beside my bed.

So... how do I say this?

I liked it?

No. I loved it.

It was perfect. Him moving inside me, kissing me gently, touching my body everywhere... it was heaven.

I don’t know how it all lead to love making but I’m happy. It was all perfect. It was heaven.

And surprisingly, I might consider of doing it again with him.

My body just ache for more from him. I want him. And last night just made me love him more.

This might sound stupid but, I’m never letting jin go anywhere. Never.

And I will give him my love; love him as I never loved anyone. I will love him with all my heart and soul.

I know. Deep inside me I know.

Jin is the one for me.

-

“kazu~...” jin murmured when he felt Kame move again. Kame just smiled as jin snuggled closer to him. He never knew that jin is this clingy.

“jin,” he said lovingly as he caressed jin’s hair, combing it with his fingers.

“good morning,” jin spoke clearly but not moving an inch.

“good morning,” Kame answered, now sure that jin is blushing.

“I love you,” jin spoke next, hiding his face more from Kame.

“I love you too,” Kame just got to laugh from that. Jin looked so adorable.

“you do?” jin asked, looking at Kame after a while.

“of course I do you idiot,” Kame beamed at him as they kiss again. Softly but needy.

“Kazu! Jin! Breakfast is ready!” Kame’s mom shouted from downstairs. After last night, they did not notice Kame’s mom’s presence. They were in deep slumber, hugging each other, blanket covering them like they were children tucked in for comfort.

“morning mom!” jin shouted as he giggled at Kame who did the same.

“morning your asses bunnies! Get down here or your mom and dad would go up there to examine on you two!” she shouted, an obvious smile on her tone. Gathering clean clothes, they went downstairs.

“how’re our love birds?” mr. Akanishi asked, winking at his wife.

“you were loud last night,” she teased.

“w-what?! What loud?!” Kame’s mom barged in, stopping herself from laughing at the pale faces of the kids.

“last night, when we arrived, we heard loud screams from Kame’s room. We thought that maybe they were just playing a game but then he moaned,” mr. Akanishi was red now from the effort of not laughing at the horror faces in front them.

“me?! moan?!” Kame asked in horror. Were they found out?

“you arrived last night?!” jin’s face was in shock and he hold on to Kame for support. Nervousness climbing his system, making his knees weak.

“yeah. We arrived last night. Problems, young man?” his mom asked, raising a brow on him, forgetting all the teasing. Jin just shook his head. A good thing they’re past the teasing or they would be discovered for real. When jin stared at Kame, he remembered that Kame might limp, giving them away. So, he helped Kame out, almost carrying his weight just leaving his feet to almost touch the floor.

‘never thought that jin’s this strong,’ Kame smiled on his head. He’ll never forget this morning that his best friend – erm – boyfriend is strong enough like this.

-

Dear diary,

A good thing it’s a Saturday today or I’d be limping on school then I’d be teased. Really. That would be embarrassing.

So, yeah. Back to topic. Mom and dad arrived last night. The teasing was just something they came up with. we were not discovered. Yet.

And I’m afraid of the day they would discover us. well, not that my two mothers and dad are against us if ever we end up in a relationship. Actually, they are pushing us together not knowing that it was all not necessary. At all. Jin just confessed to me.

“I long since loved you kazuya. I’m sure that I loved you even before you found out you love me too,”

Those were his words. Wanna know mine?

“could be. I just discovered this after our first kiss,”

Both of us remembered that kiss. And made us both blush. Well, anyways, jin is my boyfriend now. Like officially my boyfriend. Not bestfriend anymore but my boyfriend.

And yep.

19.

Well, diary, I know you get what 19 means, right? No need to explain further? Because if I explain that, I would be ranting on and on and on and on and I know neither of us want that.

So, yeah. I’m really really really really really happy I can jump from Taipei 101 and run back up by stairs and jump again.

Well, good day, diary. I’ll be writing soon. I’ll make sure to update you always, okay?

-

2^nd year of them being together was bliss. Every day, they face life with smile on their face and happy disposition. Positivity flowing in them, making them better people.

“ne, Kame, are you and jin dating?” asked junno when they all got together again in college. They are on the same class. Block section.

“us? nope. We’re not. Are we, turtle?” jin answered, staring at kazuya mischievously. Kame knows this stare. Last summer, they agreed that they would hide their relationship to others. It would be just the two of them that will know.

“no. I would never date my best friend, you idiot,” Kame laughed, looking at jin from the corner of his eye. Jin pouted for a while but smiled even before someone catches him.

Jin really wants their relationship out. Their parents are pushing them hard to admit their love. But hey! If you want to keep it a secret, you can, right? Kame wants it to be a surprise. They’ll tell it all after graduation and then they would all be shock. That would be priceless.

“really? Not dating? Bestfriends still?” koki asked as his eyes widen in disbelief.

“I thought you guys would be together after primary school! Like you two are so close,” koki added, scratching his not so itchy head. Jin and Kame laughed at him. Well, right now, no one would say they are not dating. They are obviously into each other. But they deny it.

Why no one would say they are not dating?

1.      They share drinks and food

2.      They say almost the same thing

3.      They call each other’s parent like their own

4.      They basically match their attires every day

5.      They look at each other as if no one is around

6.      They call each other turtle and panda and warn hatefully those who would use the nickname to them aside from them. And last,

7.      They are technically acting like it.

“oi turtle, it’s 19^th tomorrow, right? Wanna go out? I know this really great place to-“

“what’s the connection of 19^th to going out without us? huh? Don’t tell me it’s your monthsary,” junno barged in, cutting jin successfully.

“it’s not our ‘monthsary’ junno. It’s my birthday. And jin promised me last year that he’s going to take me out for a celebration,” Kame answered for the startled jin who was thinking over what he just said, gasping upon the realization that he almost slipped.

Kame knows that he’s never told anyone about his birthday. Only jin and his family knows about it.

“oh. I see. Can we tag along?” koki asked innocently, beaming up at the mention of celebration.

“oi, koki, jin promised Kame. Not you,” tat-chan barged in on the conversation, saving jin’s .

“yeah. You should just totally let them be,” maru also spoke, earning a thankful nod from ueda and jin.

“yeah. I promised him and not you two so leave it alone,” jin acted annoyed and turned to his phone only to message Kame.

FROM: PANDA

TO: TURTLE:

“can I come over tonight? Got something for you,”

 

FROM: TURTLE

TO: PANDA

“sure. Mom would be out late for work. You can stay and maybe sleep over so mom would be thankful that you babysat me for the night,”

 

FROM: PANDA

TO: TURTLE

“sounds good. I’ll cook dinner, okay?”

 

FROM: TURTLE

TO: PANDA

“sure. Make it special, ne? I’m becoming thin because I lost appetite lately,”

 

FROM: PANDA

TO: TURTLE

“sure! Then I’ll order some dessert from this cafe I found recently near the place. Then I’ll bring over some DVDs so we can watch after doing home works and then...?”

 

FROM: TURTLE

TO: PANDA

“the ‘?’ part is completely out of question, Kamenashi jin,”

 

FROM: PANDA

TO: TURTLE

“what? I was clueless of what we will do next. Not meaning I want to make love to you. I’m not that idiot to do you when we have classes the next day. I don’t want you to limp around and embarrass you,”

 

FROM: TURTLE

TO: PANDA

“aaawww... my baby is so cute. I wanna kiss you right now, you know. Well, what is that something you have for me?”

 

FROM: PANDA

TO: TURTLE

“secret! Well, can’t we go and at least kiss? I’m dying for a kiss right now,”

 

FROM: TURTLE

TO: PANDA

“follow my lead, okay?”

 

Kame excused himself for the rest room. After a while, jin excused himself to buy more food, telling them that he’s still hungry.

When jin disappeared, maru and ueda know where he will really go while koki and junno seemed to have no clue at all.

-

Jin came inside the rest room and found Kame alone there. He went straight to Kame and kissed his boyfriend hungrily as if he hasn’t eaten for a whole year.

“god I missed you already,” jin whispered between kisses. Kame just chuckled at him.

When done, Kame when back while jin went straight to buy food as a proof of his excuse earlier. Getting back, he bribed maru and ueda while gave koki and junno a good part to keep them busy. Jin knows that maru and ueda knows.

“what did you buy?” Kame asked jin as he picked up a chip from jin’s pack.

“just something to keep my mouth from sending signal to my head that I’m still hungry,” jin answered Kame but his focus was on his notebook.

-

Dear diary,

I never kissed jin like that. It was a needy, hungry kiss. It was the first time I was fired up, hungry for his lips. Really. I love it when we kiss but with that kind of kiss, I might not let him out alive without satisfying the hunger for those full lips.

It was really different.

Well, anyways, tomorrow, we are officially three years and I know jin got something in store for me. well, got something for him too. Well ,if you know what I mean.

Well, okay. I got all my allowance for this and asked mom for a little help too. I baked a cake for jin and it was his favourite. Dark chocolate cake with vanilla icing and chocolate chip, top with dark chocolate slices. Mom asked me actually why I wanted to make such a cake. I just said that it was for a classmate’s birthday. Well, good thing she bought it and we allowed it to cool in the fridge. Mom would be out tonight for her job. A really good thing because we can have the house for ourselves tonight. The night before our anniversary. Well, gotta go and check that everything is in place before jin arrive later.

Oh no. Here  he is. He’s outside the door! I’m nervous! Bye!

-

“good evening, kazu,” jin smiled as he entered the house.

“yeah. You too. Sorry I need to go back up to my room. I need to finish this home work. I swear I could have finished it earlier if not for mom’s lazy speech before she went on her way. So, yeah, just, do your thing and call me when you’re done,” Kame tried acting normal though his hands are shaking.

“sure. I’ll cook dinner then we can have dinner together. Want me to help you out?” jin offered but earned a no from Kame.

-

Diary!!!

He’s downstairs! He’s gonna cook dinner and he’s so gonna make it special. I know he would. I’m really nervous! What am I gonna do?!

I already finished all of my home works just to prepare for this. Already took a bath too and even checked everything twice. But, I’m still nervous!

Urgh! Should I go down now? Should I go and watch him cook? It might make him nervous though. Urgh! Whatever. I would just go down like this. I’d act indifferent. Yosh.

-

“jin? Mind if I watch you?” Kame asked as he stepped in the kitchen, watching as jin gracefully move around.

“no problem. I was actually worrying that you will take long. This would be ready in a few so, patience, okay?” jin smiled at him, making his heart skip a beat. Jin never failed to do that.

After a few, jin was done. Untying the apron around his waist, he joined kazuya in eating.

“this is so good!” Kame beamed as he takes more spoonfuls of the food.

“I’m glad you liked it.”

-

The movie was starting when jin reached for the little paper bag he had concealed inside the bigger one that contained the ingredients for the food he cooked earlier.

He was really happy right now. And would be even happier if Kame would accept the first part of his gift.

“kazu,” he called out Kame’s attention. Kame looked at him and then to his hand that was in front him.

“yes, jin?” he answered though already curious of the small box.

“Advance happy anniversary,” jin smiled and revealed a cute necklace to Kame. This would be the first part of it. Tomorrow would be the next.

Kame gasped. It was so cute. Jin helped him wore it and he thanked jin by kissing him. No words. Just long kissing session before Kame remembered the cake he baked for jin. It really sounds lame now.

“waaahhhh!!!!!!!!!! Cake!!!!!!!!!” jin beamed and dug onto the cake, leaving a laughing Kame at his childishness.

-

Dear diary,

Jin gave me a necklace! Can’t take a photo of it because it’s dark. 

Ne, diary, sorry if I would continue this tomorrow, okay? Jin and I got some really serious business to finish as of the moment.

Ja!

-

Kame was back downstairs a little later, making jin pout. Although he was perfectly happy at the cake, Kame’s absence made it feel sad.

“ne, kazu~ what took you long?” jin asked, snuggling to kazu.

“missed me already? Aaawwww my baby is so cute..” Kame cooed, making jin act more childish.

However, a little later, they were on the floor, moans loud enough to fill the room but not waking up neighbours.

-

The next day was blissful if you’d ask Kame. They travelled far though. But it was safer. Under the sun, they were able to get a taste of how it is like to act carefree, not thinking if someone would see them holding each other’s hand, kissing every now and then and cooing at each other. It was a perfect 3^rd anniversary celebration.

“ne, kazu, what do you think of turtles?” jin suddenly asked Kame. He was confused though but answered: “I think they’re cute. They are adorable and they are logical, I guess,” Kame bit his lower lip, earning him a kiss from jin.

“you are so cute,” jin cooed and then kissed him again.

-

Time passed. Fourth anniversary, 5^th. They are the picture of a perfect couple. Their parents knew it all during their fourth anniversary and they were ecstatic. Followed by their friends, they are all happy picture.

Then there came jin. Making it more than perfect.

Graduation time. Everybody is busy with the preparations and teachers are all busy.

The same with jin.

Kame was left alone most of the time. Jin would always find an excuse to leave him under tat-chan’s care – he only person jin entrusted kazuya with – and would go on his way. Kame tried to understand him. Also, he’s a bit busy about the clearance before they graduate.

But it was all just too much that jin also stopped going to their house on dinner dates with akanishis. He would always find an excuse not to go or even message him or answer his call.

“patience, kazu... all good things to those who wait,” mr. Akanishi held his shoulder firmly to calm him down.

“yes darling. Patience. Wait and it will all be good. Jin is just really busy with things right now. I’m pretty sure that after all this things, you’ll be with him always,” mrs. Akanishi comforted him, hugging him tightly.

“like really, mom. What is happening with him? He does not even answer my call,” Kame pouted, hugging the woman closer to him.

“he’s just doing things. That’s all,” his mom shrugged, joining the group hug.

“sorry I was late,” jin suddenly busted on the door. Their parents sighd in relief while kazuya frowned at him.

“so. Finally done with your business?” Kame asked jin, annoyance on his tone as jin walked to him and hugged him tight.

“tomorrow is graduation day, kazu... don’t be grumpy... you should be happy...” jin smiled brightly, earning him a knowing look from the three.

“yeah. Be happy. Right. As if I can be happy when I don’t receive a single text from you nor call backs when you don’t answer your phone, huh?! You expect me to be in good mood when I all day sit here, waiting for you to remember me!” Kame shouted, pouting at jin, crossing his arms on his chest.

Jin stepped closer and kissed kazuya’s temple, thenhis cheek then his lips.

“don’t be angry at me, please?” jin looked at him with kicked puppy’s eyes.

“can I stay angry at you with that look?” Kame sighed in surrender and kissed his boyfriend. Only when someone cleared did they break the kiss.

“dinner is ready,” Kame’s mom spoke softly with a smile on her face. The rest of the night went smoothly and Kame was completely happy. With the graduation the next day and jin’s apology tonight, he’s happy.

-

“Kame! We are going to be late!” jin called out as Kame made a stop to fix his suit.

“wait, will you?! I’m nervous here!” Kame shouted at jin while jin approached him and helped him out.

“you look perfect kazu. No one would be as perfect as you,” jin spoke and kissed kazu in front all the people that are walking by. No one seemed to mind though and so Kame return the kiss.

-

“and the last class, the students from class 4D,” the woman announced and Kame stood up with the rest, making their way to the stage as each one of them were called by pair.

Kame was confused. They should come after maru and tat-chan. But they were not called. Instead, the woman skipped to junno and koki.

“maybe the list was messed up?” jin suggested, seeing the look on Kame’s face.

“I don’t know. We are the only one out of it.” Kame shrugged as he heard the woman finally call out his last name.

“Kamenashi jin and akanishi kazuya,”

Kame gasped, though maintaining poise as he walked with jin to the stage. He whispered that te names were mixed up but the woman made no effort in correcting herself. Instead, he looked at jin who placed the diploma down on the nearest table where all the diplomas where placed and faced the crowd. He was passed with a microphone by the principal himself before jin spoke.

“today I stand here in front of you to first, thank you all for understanding me. for agreeing with me while I took the effort to talk with you all, annoying some and making some happy and proud of me.

Thanks to my two mothers, and my dad who supported me with all this things when I told them my plan.

Also, thank you, mr. Principal, for understanding me the moment I said my purpose on why I went to beg you at your office that day.

I am also sorry for all the disturbance I brought,” jin bowed down, confusing Kame more. he looked at the crowd who seem to be nodding in understanding and the principal who was smiling.

“January 5^th. What is so special about that day? That was the first time I met the angel that changed me and my life. The turtle that turned my world upside down in a good way. The day, I got to know the meaning of happiness.

“February 23^rd of the same year. I celebrated with him the first time. We are youn and innocent and happy. We are a picture of ideal childhood that I know some envies.

“March 4^th a year after, the first time my little turtle kissed me on my cheek. The first time I felt a weird thing on my tummy. Like million butterflies having a party. The first time I struggled with my own emotions.

“April 10^th of the same year, I knew I was in love.

“may 14^th, three years after, I was first jealous. It was when Kazu was talking to this girl in our neighbourhood that I thought his type. It was the very first time I felt a mix of anger and fear. And it was not pleasant at all.

“June 5^th, same year, we kissed for the first time. It was a soft one. a tender one. but filled with the inhibitions of need and desire. Of bursting love and butterflies.

“July 18^th, next month, the first time I was not able to sleep because of happiness.

“August 17^th, first time we had an argument.

“September 25^th, we dated for the first time. It was nothing grand nor really romantic, but it was perfect. The shining sun, the warm breez that surrounded us. it was perfect the way it is.

“October 31^st, the first time Kazu ignored me for a whole day. I scared him with some costume for Halloween and it was funny, yet hellish for me. Him ignoring me made me more than sad.

“noverber 19^th, our third anniversary. It was perfect. Nothing much for an anniversary. But feeling him near me, beside me was enough. Just seeing him smile from the necklace I gave is more than enough. And the cake he baked, it was freaking delicious.

“December 25^th, first Christmas that our parents already know our relationship, following year, was bliss. I could not ask for more. We can kiss in front them, hold each other’s hand without worrying and be like real lovers on the Christmas morning.

“A whole complete list of memorable things for me. a whole complete list of my happiness since I found kazu.

“I never believed in destiny. But our meeting was magic. It was destiny. I know. I can feel it. The wave of excitement when I see him smile, the crashing sadness when he cries. The urgent feeling of hate when he’s hurt and the feeling of being useless when he’s in pain. It was destiny that brought us together, weaving the perfect love story. Making us one,”

 jin was teary now. Kame was teary too. He was shocked, confused and happy altogether. Their parents were at the back, crying too. Some people are crying, touched by jin’s words. Some remain blank while some nodded in understanding.

“I love him more than my words can say, further than the bright sun can reach. I will always love him for eternity even if death threatens us to part. I know, deep in my heart, he is my saving angel that God sent to this world to save me from my own self.

“mom, today I, akanishi jin, stand before you, using this special moment to ask for your son’s hand to be entrusted to me, with the promise of happiness and fulfilment that you can hold on to,” jin looked at Kame’s mom who stood up and shouted.

“yes, akanishi jin. I entrust my son to you holding on to your promises,”

“mom, dad, I, akanishi jin, stand before you to ask for your blessing for the prosperity of our future,” jin turned to his parents who gave him two thumbs up.

“ladies and gentlemen, I ask you to give me permission to kneel down in front of this special person right beside me to ask him that one question I have always yearned to ask,” jin turned to the crowd and to the teachers who gave him a small nod.

Facing Kame, jin’s eyes are blurred due to the tears of happiness that is consuming him. Kneeling down, his heart was beating fast. Really fast as he was nervous of what kame’s answer would be.

“Kamenashi kazuya, I kneel before you with the full hope of your willingness to spend the rest of your life with me. will you allow me to have you and make you the ‘akanishi kazuya’ of my life while I your ‘kamenashi jin’?” jin sighed inwardly with relief. He pulled it all off perfectly, words rolling off his lips perfectly as if waiting for that very moment.

Looking around, the crowd was tensed as he is, waiting for his answer. Waiting for his yes that would make this special occasion perfect. But he has to ask something to jin first. He’s been feeling this weird tinge of loneliness while jin was away doing this big surprise.

The fear of losing jin had been present.

“jin, if you become my ‘Kamenashi jin’, do you promise me that you would never leave me?” Kame asked, eyes focused on jin still though he was crying with happiness.

“I will always be beside you forever,” jin smiled at him softly as he presented him a turtle ring with black stone.

“be my ‘akanishi kazuya’ and I promise you that I will be beside you  always,” jin spoke before Kame reached out to jin so he can fit the ring on his finger.

-

Dear diary,

Guess what?! I am officially engaged to jin!!!!

 

 

Got a printed version for you diary. Want to remember this moment with the picture.

Right now, I want to shout, I want to scream, I want to go to Macau and bungee jump until all this happiness subside. That’s how happy I am.

All those people congratulating us, jin, me, they are all so kind and supporting. They all said a ‘good job’ to jin and told me to take care of my future husband.

And it is all but made me think of little sadness.

I was perfectly happy. The whole time he was not answering my calls, not replying to my messages, all those is because of this one moment. This very special moment of all.

His proposal.

Four of our friends congratulated us after the closing remarks to the graduation celebration. Koki was even surprised when jin went to his house and bowed to him and his parents, asking them to help him out pull a perfect proposal to me. Some suggested him to take me to the beach but he insisted on graduation where everyone would be watching, letting everybody know that he loves me and he will be there for me forever. Of course I don’t believe in forever. Nothing lasts forever. But this love? Even after so many reincarnations, I am sure this love of ours will continue. Fulfilling the promise of forever and ever. Of never parting and never leaving another. Promises of staying by each other’s side always, bound to go through everything together.

Even if death do us part.

Mushy, am I not?

I know. This is called ‘being in love’.

Trust me, diary, this is the best feeling of them all. And you know what?

Jin’s got us already an apartment! We can move in anytime we want! Jin’s been planning for this for two years now and he made sure to prepare well for it all. How sweet of my future husband to be, right?

Well, I won’t be jealous anymore if there are girls that would surround him. Because I know that his eyes are only at me, not looking at any others girls to check them out.

Because jin knows what he is putting himself to.

He knows what he is doing and he knows that he love me so much.

Well, diary, I need to get a good night sleep, okay? Our parents planned a vacation only for the two of us. we are going to Okinawa and they promised us that our vacation would be memorable before the plans for the wedding.

I’m really happy.

Really really really really really happy.

Night diary.

Ja!

-

Kame slept early to prepare for the trip to Okinawa tomorrow.

In the middle of the night, jin’s number appeared on Kame’s phone.

“hello? Kazu? Jin’s dead,”

 

~fin~