It has been a while since I come to this place and I wonder how much it changed time from time. I walked through the balcony and I keep on smiling. I wonder for all this time, did I miss this place or the memory that we create together? How I wish that I can turn back the time and never let a single chance that I have. I walked until I stop at one place which is our classroom. Yes! That’s the first place that we met and started to be close. I enter the empty classroom. Everything was change except the layout of table and chair. Its remain same. I looked around and the memory keeps on wondering in my mind. I sat at the chair and table like I used to be a long time ago.

 

Flashback one

 

First day of high school.  Everyone so excited to be in school. you walked through the balcony and meet Sohee half the way to class.

“Sohee!” you scream and run to Sohee. She turns back and waits for you.

“How are you?” Sohee, one of you friends or should you called her as best friends? Yeah! you knows Sohee from the first day of school and she knows almost everything about you.

“Fine. My holiday was awesome. You? Any interesting stories to share?” As usual, Sohee will only smile. Yeah! She’s the one who are difficult to share something or talks a lot. Both of you walked until to the classroom and find the seat. It will be your seat until the end of semester. Everyone start chatting and update with each other.

 

“Hi!” You looked back and see two boys seat behind you and Sohee. You just respond with smile and looked in front.

 

End

 

I looked at the table. Heck yes! Its still be there.

 

U & I

 

“U & I.” Do I look stupid like this? Smile on this words. Both of us wrote this only for fun but…

 

Flashback two

 

“What are you doing?”

“I wrote this.” Jinki show it to you.

“U & I? stand for what?”

“You and I. We are friends forever. Remember? No matter what happen, you will always be mine and I also always yours.” Jinki smile and you looked at him. Wonder how long it will be lasted.

 

End

 

Well! Not everything will be what we planned right? So, I accept it as one of our memory together. I get up and walked go to the garden. We used to spend our time here. Four of us. We not doing anything just hang out here while waiting for next class and doing our assignment together. I miss that moment until… he started to meet new friends.

 

Flashback three

 

“you. I need advice.”

“Hurm…” You eyes still glued on the laptop screen. You need to finish all the assignment by today.

“you!!! Listen to me!” He will feel annoying if he wants to talk then no one paid attention to him.

“I’m listening. Go on…” You continue typing and suddenly Jinki pulled the laptop from your lap and turn your until you face him.

“Ok! Now tell me. What?! I need to finish all the assignment by today.” You start feel so annoying.

“Hurmmm… actually… hurmmm…”

“I’m waiting…” You feel so impatient.

“Hurmmm… actually…”

“What?!!!!” You scream.

“I like someone but I did not know whether she likes me or not.” Jinki spilled out and suddenly you feel like your soul leave your body.

“Ehem! Who is she?” Your hands and feet’s feel so cold while waiting his answer.

“Can I keep it as secret? I’m promise, I will show to you.”

“Ok then… oh! I think I got to go. I promise to Miss Ji to see her and show the assignment before I submitted it to her.” You find an excuse to go. Your heart beating like crazy. You run through the entire field.

 

Three days later.

 

You saw him with one girl at canteen.

“you!” Jinki wave his hands to you. You come closer and smile. Yes! Fake smile.

“Hi! Why did you go to canteen first? Huh!” You pouted.

“Sorry! I already make a promise with Bora to lunch together. Come join us.” Jinki looked so happy.

“It’s ok! I think I want to go to library. Finish all the assignment. You already email your part right? So, I better go before library full with students…” You turn back and walk fast to go out from the canteen. Jinki blinked his eyes. He hasn’t said anything to you.

 

End

 

 

The days pass just like that. He met a new friend or should I call it as girlfriend? Yes! That girl already becomes his girlfriend and our relationship, day by day become more awkward. He starts to ignore me and when we argue, he starts to use his high tone of his voice. I hate that. I feel so useless. I wonder why all this happen but… in the end, I keep in my mind that… people changed. That’s it.

 

I lay back at the garden and feel so good. I wish Sohee with me now. I miss her so much. I think it’s my all fault. I lost control and start hurting my friends feeling. Do not know what I thinking at that time. It’s all become miserable. I am sorry, Sohee.

 

Flashback four

 

“Can you leave me alone? I need time for myself. Please!” You shout at Sohee.

“Why are you like this? Where is my friend? My lovely friend, who always laughed with me and share all her problem,. WHERE?!” Sohee shouted back at you. You look speechless.

“Just go! Please...” You were begging.

“No until you tell me what’s wrong. It is because of Jinki? Because he shouted at you? Because both of you arguing about small matter? Or because he has girlfriend?” Seriously, you speechless with all the guess from Sohee.

“I’m always with you. Remember?” Sohee hugs you.

“Just go. I don’t need anyone. Go!” You pushed Sohee and walked away.

 

End

 

Start from that day, I become more quite and passive. No more smiles, laughing or talking. I am all by myself and luckily it has only one week left for end this semester.  Sohee also start to ignore me. Everything changes. Yes! Totally changed.  I remember how I take my final exams and try to talk to Sohee but… she ignored and makes me invisible in front of others.  Again! I know it all my mistake.

 

I get up and walked to the field. I sat on the bench and remember how I used to run around with him and early in the morning, he will wake me up to force me jogging with him. I saw one couple jog around the field like I used to be with him. I miss him or miss the memory? I always ask the same question to myself but I still cannot find the answer.

 

Flashback five

 

Last day of school. Unexpected things happen.

“you!!!” Jinki run to you but you keep on walking.

“you!!!! STOP!!! I said stop!!!” Jinki shouted to you and finally he grabbed your right arm. He taking his breath slowly but in the same time, you try to escape from him.

“It’s true?” You still try to loose the grip.

“I said… it is true?!!” Jinki lost his patience.

“Let me go!!!” Suddenly, he forces you to follow his step.

 

“WHAT?!” Finally you can loose his grip.

“WHY?!” He asks you back. You step out from the classroom.

“No! you cannot go until you explain it to me!” He closed the door back and you facing him. You sighed. You know that it you still are like this, he won’t let you go.

“Please! I need to go.” You voice start shaking.

“Why?!”

“For good!”

“Liar!!!” He raised his voice again.

“We are friend forever, right?” You try to smile.

“You will always be mine and I also always yours. That’s it! I don’t want you to go! FINAL!!!” You smirked at his statement.

“Thanks but… I don’t think I can be yours forever. Please… don’t be like this. For all this time, we can go through all this. Why not now? You with your life and me with my life. It’s should be like this from the start. Let me go and if there any chance for us to meet again. Let us to be friends again. Ok?” You hold his hand and smile. You open the door and walked away. Leave Jinki alone at the classroom.

 

Jinki POV.

 

“But… I love you!”

 

I feel so stupid! Why do I cannot say this word to you? I let you go and… now… I regret it. I want to chase you but… I did not know whether you feel same like what I feel. I know, if I let you go now, means I will lose you forever. Why do I not make an effort to hold on you while you still with me? Now, I know that my life feel so empty without you. I here all alone and you leave me. No turning back.

 

End

 

5 years later, I come back to this place. Yes! All memory keeps on playing. From one place to another. After I am moving out from this place. I go to somewhere to follow my family and continue my days as usual. If anyone asks me, whether I already find someone who can fill my heart. The answer is NO. Do not know why, maybe I still waiting for miracle? Huh! Stupid, right? Yeah! I do agree about that. Stupid me! Waiting for something that never and won’t be happen! Maybe he already happy with his life and I’m the one who are still waiting for him.

 

I looked at the watch. Wow! Surprisingly! It’s been a whole day I’m here. Time flies fast. I think its time for me to go back to my real life. All in here was memory and I still have my future to carry on.

 

“you.” That voice. I turn back and see him standing behind me with a smile. Oh heart! Please behave!

“You! What are you doing here?” You stutter.

“Visited our memory.” That smile! I really miss that smile.

“How long… no… what time… no… huh…” You do not know what to say and try to breathe properly.

“I follow you for whole day. From car park, classroom, garden, canteen and this field.” He smiles. Speechless. Yes! I’m speechless! Unexpected him!

-The End-