*okay, try not to take this too seriously. It's suppose to be funny. .. and I'm sorry if I offended any one.*

The world famous boy band, EXO, had been aimlessly sitting around the studios for the past few days. Sure, most of them were working on the songs and dances, but for the most part, there was really not much to do.

Kyungsoo sat on the large black leather couch of the artist's longue, watching his favorite drama, when he saw a dark-skinned boy scurry into the room. Kyungsoo sighed, all too annoyed with the younger man's recent antics. He saw the hurried boy jump across the coffee table and trip his way to the closet. The young man pleaded silently for Kyungsoo to be quiet, and entered the small room, shutting the door behind him. Kyungsoo rolled his eyes before returning to his shows.

His attention was once again drawn from the drama when a tall, angry member of EXO came before him. The older member was practically spewing fire in rage, however, he was dripping wet. "Where's. Jongin?" He hissed through clenched teeth.

"Damn, Wu Fan. What did he do this time?" Kyungsoo tsked, giving Kris another once over. However, all the big-eyed member got as a response was a snarl. Kyungsoo clicked his tongue before saying, "Haven't seen him." With that, Kris trudged his wet-self out of room.

Kai poked his head out from the closet, "Is he gone?"

"Oh, baby, you owe me big time." Kyungsoo scolded, standing up to put his hands on his hips.

"I love you~" Kai walked over to the couch.

"Whatever." Kyungsoo picked up his drama set and walked to the door. "I think I'll watch this somewhere else." And he also left the room.

Kai pouted, but when he saw Kyungsoo's bowl of popcorn still on the table, he shrugged and jumped onto the couch, "More for me~"

------------

Kyungsoo grumbled to himself as he left the room. "Dammit, Jongin! Why can't you just sit and act like a normal kid for once?!"

Suddenly, when Kyungsoo had finished his little complaint, the lights had all turned off. "Kyungsoo-" He heard a deep voice speak. "I have a proposition for you." Kyungsoo, not intimidated in the least bit, raised a brow.

"I'm listening..." A hand touched his shoulder. He turned around to see a dim flashlight illuminating the face of EXO's most devilish member: Chen.

"My cult and I, also known as the Order of the Perplexed Brothers-"

"I thought we were going with the Order of Alpacas..."

"Shuddup, Kris! I'm talking!" Chen yelped. Kyungsoo figured the whole 'order' was standing in the room with him. "Anyway, we are tired of Kai's constant, immature, annoying pranks! We have carefully constructed a prank that will put his pranking urge to death! However, we cannot complete the mission without your help... What do say? Will you join the Order of the Perplexed Brothers-that-has-a-member-who-owns-a-stuffed-alpaca?"

"Thank you." Kris stated at Chen's compromise.

Kyungsoo thought back to all the times recently when he had to cover for his childish boyfriend's pranks. All the times Kai had gotten yelled at by the managers, and ESPECIALLY all the times Kyungsoo was the victim in these pranks, "Ok. Let's do it."

"Welcome to the Brotherhood!" All the mysterious members gave one clap, one snap, and a jumble of words that was supposed to be a group chant.

"yeesh..." Kyungsoo sighed. "Remind me to never let any of you be bored ever again." he said as a blindfold was put on him, and he was dragged away.

When the blindfold was taken off of Kyungsoo's eyes, he realized he was in TVXQ's boardroom. He looked around to see Xiumin standing at the white board in front, which had a cute checklist on it. Next to Xiumin, Chen sat at the head of the table. Next to Chen was Tao and Kris. Kyungsoo himself was sitting on the other side of Chen.

"Alright, why don't we start the meeting by thanking our dearest Yunho-Hyung, for letting us use the boardroom." Xiumin spoke, pointing to the first option on the white board with a ruler.

Kyungsoo turned toward the door where he saw Yunho leaning against the frame with arms crossed. "As long as you guys clean up and are out by 3:00, you're welcome to use it however you like... even if it IS very strange..." He pushed off the wall to leave but suddenly stopped to say "Oh and don't go picking through the fridge. Changmin's VERY possessive of his food. I don't even touch that thing." Then he left.

"Brothers. Let us next welcome our newest member: D.O.!" They once again gave a clap, a snap, and their variation of a group chant.

"D.O.? Really? You all know my name's Kyungsoo.." Tao waved his hand to Kyungsoo, showing that all was good in the hood.

"Brother Xiumin. Shall we talk of the name next?" Chen interrupted.

"Ah yes. Now, to make sure it's a fair deal, we shall all write a word or phrase and I shall string them all together to make the name." Minseok nodded, handing out the sticky notes and pens for everyone. "As for the uniform we discussed last time... I was able to obtain them!" Xiumin smirked as he pulled out a box.

 "No way! Did you pay the Coordi-noona?" Chen laughed as he opened the box.

"I have my ways..." Xiumin smirked.

The tallest of them, Kris, pulled the box to him and pulled out bags with all their names on them. He handed them out as Minseok took back the papers. The original four members excitedly threw on their clothes, but Kyungsoo had a problem with his.

"There's no way I'm wearing the robes from Mama..." However, after being bribed, blackmailed, and threatened, he was tied down to the chair and forced to wear the ugly garbage bag they called robes.

"Well! Now that that's settled," Xiumin clapped, "I have the name!" He cleared his throat and continued. "We shall be known as 'The Order of the Dancing Machine Alpacas Who Like to Cook Buns and Will Kung-Fu Those Hoes Down.' "

They all sat there in silence for a moment before Kris said, "Well I like it..."

---------Some time later----------

Kai was sitting in the lounge. A couple of the members were there, eating little Chinese snacks. Kai decided to fill his time by complaining about the fact that the Company wasn't allowing him to snacks Luhan had brought in.

The Brotherhood chose this opportune moment to enter the room. Kai looked up and gave a little yelp, "Wu Fan!" He jumped up from the floor he had just been rolling around on and made a dash for the door. This move was fairly risky, considering Kris was standing in the middle of the exit.

The tall, slightly annoyed leader grabbed a hold of Kai, "I'm not mad, go back to your complaining and rolling," He spoke through gritted teeth.

"Like a Buffalo, right?" Kai poked Wu Fan's side, earning him a glare.

"Shut up." Kris proceeded to push Jongin into the room. He led the way for Brother Chen, who was carrying a laptop. Chen took a seat at the large couch, placing the laptop on the coffee table, next to Luhan's tempting food.

He never said anything as he began reading the website he was on. He went out of his way to laugh at the funny things, and practically sob at the sad. Kris smirked when he saw Jongin pick up his head to look at Chen curiously.

"Uh..." the blonde said when he noticed the few other members in the room start to get curious as well. "Luhan, Sehun, Yixing. I don't understand the dance. Can you guys help...?" He gave a fake smile.

"Oh gawd!" Luhan clapped at stood up. "I thought you'd never ask!" He pulled Sehun and Lay to their feet.

"Seriously, Wu Fan, I was starting to get worried." Lay said as he pulled Kris out the door. "We may actually look good for our comeback!" He laughed, sufficiently insulting their leader.

"Soooo...." Kai spoke to Jongdae, the only other person in the room now. "Wacha got there?" He tapped his fingers, using a little aegyo on his hyung.

"What, this?" Chen pointed to the laptop. Jongin nodded furiously. "Oh, you don't want to see this. You'll regret it. You don't have what it takes to read this."

"Yes I do!" Kai pouted like a kid. "...What is it?" He tried to look over Chen's shoulder. Jongdae pulled the computer away.

"I dunno, Jongin. These things can get pretty intense... Besides, this one is rated, and you're not old enough to read it." Chen smirked, knowing the plan was working.

"Hey." Kai spoke lowering his voice. "I'm 18. Man, C'mon." He spoke using the swag he usually saved for the stage.

Chen sighed, "Alright. I give up." He let go of the computer, "But don't blame me if it disturbs you." Jongdae stood up and walked out of the door. "Good luck." He chuckled.

After Jongin had made sure Chen left, he looked down at the screen. "'An EXO Fic Recommendation'?" He scrolled down the webpage. "Kaisoo? Well, that sounds like it's about me~" He laughed and clicked. He sat back to read one of his stories.

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"Brother D.O.! How goes?" Zitao smiled, walking up to one of his clan mates. Kyungsoo sat just outside the SM lounge, watching Kai read.

"Tao... How long are these fics? He's been in there all day!" Kyungsoo asked, getting a little worried.

Tao laughed and looked in as well, "Maybe he's hooked, like Baekhyun." Tao suggested.

"Baekhyun reads fanfiction?" Kyungsoo was a little surprised.

The maknae nodded. "He doesn't JUST read them. He's got, like, a weird blog, and a website dedicated to his own fics, but other than that, I don't know much." Tao sighed and looked at his watch. "I just feel bad for Brother Kris. He's been practicing with Luhan, Sehun, and Yixing since Jongin started... I checked in on him, and they've been really hard on him..."

Kyungsoo laughed, "Well, it's almost dinner. I'll call everyone to the lounge if you go get the food." Tao agreed and they left Kai to sit in his feels.

-----------------------

The members of EXO had all slowly piled into the room, taking seats around Kai, who was hunched over the computer. A hand was over his mouth, trying to hold back his ugly sobbing as the herose of the story came to a tragic ending.

"Jongin!" Kyungsoo snapped at his boyfriend. "Will you put that thing away I'm giving you food?!" Kai slowly closed the laptop, unable to stop the river of tears from his eyes.

He picked up his chopsticks and began eating his food, not saying a word. "Ummmm..." Suho finally spoke up about the dancer, "Did someone break Jongin?"

Baekhyun laughed, "I know that face. He probably read one of his own stories." Baekhyun rolled his eyes.

Kai leaned back in his seat, muttering, "I can't... I can't... I can't!" He curled up into a ball and turned to Kyungsoo. "Baby, why don't I ever tell you 'I love you'?"

"Because you do...?" D.O. clicked his tongue with sass.

Pretending not to hear Kyungsoo, the upset member addressed each member. "Chanyeol, you're not broken, and Baekhyun loves you. Baekhyun, tell him you love him! Tell him now!"

"Jeez, I love you, Channie." Baekhyun shook his head.

"Um... thanks?" Chanyeol questioned.

"Luhan!" Kai spoke, holding back sniffles. "You're not as dumb as everyone thinks you are. .. and Sehun! You're the youngest! Stop looking at Luhan like he's a dinner buffet!" Sehun and Luhan merely crossed their arms, obviously not amused.

'Minseok, Jongdae, Yixing, Joonmyun. No one likes you, so there aren't any fics about you, but I like you plenty!" Kai finally turned to Kris and Tao. "Zitao. I have so many feels, cause everyone writes you differently! Wu Fan always treats you so well! Just love him back for once! Wu Fan... you can cry... so..." Jongin couldn't even finish his sentence, breaking out into more tears.

"Great Gatsby! How many did you read?" Xiumin asked Kai, surprised by all his knowledge and trying hard not to laugh.

"I stopped counting after 20." The dancer admitted, burring his face in his hands.

Kris leaned over to Chen and whispered, "This could probably be the prank in itself..." The little devil smirked at his hyung.

---------------------

After dinner, the members of the Order of the Dancing Alpacas Who Like to Cook Buns, and Will Kung-Fu Those Hoes Down met in TVXQ's meeting room again.

"I think we can consider phrase one of the plan done!" Brother Xiumin crossed it off the list and the members gave their ritual clap, snap, and chant.

"Oh, this is weird." The members all turned to the door to see their Sunbae Changmin standing there. "Just don't eat my food, especially the Turtle Ice Cream. It took me forever to find!" He shook his head and left.

Kyungsoo turned a light shade of pink from embarrassment at having his respected Sunbae call him weird. He looked toward the board and saw what the next step was: Waiting.

---------------------

So the Order waited a few days. They noticed how Jongin quickly enveloped himself in the interwebs. He practically became a walking talking version of the internet, quoting the fics he spent hours reading every day, and commenting to himself using memes he had somehow come across.

Thankfully, without Jongin even knowing it, the whole group had an interior motive to lure Baekhyun out of his room. The members were delighted to find the singer had ventured out into the world and would even spend some evenings in the lounge. Of course, he would be talking to Jongin about the newest fics, but it was a step...!

Finally, after a few weeks of sitting in silence, the Order made their move. Xiumin and Chen entered the lounge to find Kai sleeping on the couch. They noticed the laptop unsurprisingly opened to a blog, the page having been opened just a half hour ago.

"Geez, Jongin. He JUST fell asleep, like literally right now. He must have been online all night!" Chen poked Kai awake. "Hey, , Who's 'Kyungsoo-RP'?" He glanced at the opened blog.

"Oh that's me." Jongin rubbed his eyes sleepily, only getting 30 minutes of sleep. "I'm a Kyungsoo role  player." He looked at his messages, a pop-up showed he had a new one.

          "Chanyeol-RP to Kyungsoo-RP: I got in his pants~! Where's my cupcake?" Kai laughed and typed a quick response.

          "Kyungsoo-RP to Chanyeol-RP: What?! I don't believe you! Copy and paste the message!"

"Wait, wait, wait," Xiumin stopped Kai, "Who's 'Chanyeol-RP'? The internet is a dangerous place, you can't just talk to anyone!" The oldest put his hands on his hips.

"Of course I know Chanyeol-RP.......... It's Baekhyun." He said, never looking away from the blog.

Chen tried to hold back a laugh, "Why don't you just go TALK to Baekhyun?"

"Yeah. Ok. Thanks." Kai answered; scrolling like crazy.

The two troublemakers glanced at each other and nodded. The younger stepped aside to let Xiumin talk. The bun quickly shut the laptop closed. "Jongin... We have to tell you something.... Kyungsoo is dying."

Jongin immediately snapped into attention. 'What?" he said, his eyes darkening. Jongdae and Minseok opted not to say anything, lest they laugh. "Where is he?" The dancer asked, his voice barely audible.

Xiumin acted as if wiping away a tear , "His room."

Jongin stood up and ran out of the room. Chen and Xiumin burst out into laughter right after. Kai raced to the dorms as if his life depended on it.

"KYUNGSOO! Baby... I'm here. Kyungsoo?!" Jongin yelled.

"Jongin? I'm in here." Kyungsoo spoke quietly from the bedroom.

"Baby," Kai walked into the room. He pulled Kyungsoo toward him. "What's wrong?"

"Jongin..." Kyungsoo held back fake tears. "I have cancer."

In that one second, Kai's entire world  shattered. He fell to his knees on the floor. He grasped his lover's cold hands. remembering all the fics where Kyungsoo died a fateful death before he could even say anything, Jongin said, "I..... I ... Love you." Kai looked up at Kyungsoo, his large eyes watering, making Kyungsoo feel even worse for what he was doing. Kai kissed Kyungsoo's hand. When he spoke, his voice was high, broken and heavy with emotion. "How long?"

The older shook his head. "We're seeing the doctor tomorrow." Kyungsoo spoke. His voice surprisingly uneven for his own preference.

"Oh, god..." Kai let the tears spill over, clutching Kyungsoo's hands as if they would disappear if he let go.

----------------------

The Order set up TVXQ's board room to look like a doctor's office. Kyungsoo led the way, never letting go of Kai's hand. "Honey, isn't this TVXQ's room?" Kai asked, a little confused.

"Yeah, I just asked the doctor to meet us here, you know how I feel about hospitals..." Kyungsoo tsked his love. He walked into the board room.

Just outside the room, Brothers Kris, Xiumin, Tao, and Chen met. "Wow, Brother Xiumin. Props." Chen observed, looking over Tao multiple times.

"Baekhyun's not the only one handy with a make-up brush," Xiumin mentally patted himself on the back. "Now Tao, do you remember who you are?"

Tao laughed and nodded, "I'm Doctor Huang, Zitao's Uncle who specializes in Cancer." He spoke in his made up accent. He threw on the oversized Medical clothes and grabbed the clip board from Wu Fan. "Wish me luck!" He smiled at the members as they gave a clap, snap, and chanted.

Tao knocked on the door.

"Come in," Kyungsoo spoke, still holding onto Kai's hand.

The youngest entered the room, leaving the door open a crack for the three brothers in the hall to listen. "Hello, I'm Doctor Huang. I'm Zitao's Uncle, who specializes in Cancer." He shook Kyungsoo and Jongin's hands.

"Oh he's good." Kris whispered, watching the scene. The other two nodded.

"Doctor!" Kai fell to the floor, grabbing Tao's clothes, "You MUST save him! He's the only love in my life!" Kyungsoo was touched Kai cared so much.

"Sir! Please sit down." Tao walked around them to the other side of the desk. He convincingly looked down to his papers. "Oh dear..." He frowned. "This is going to be hard to say..."

"Doctor Huang, please." Kyungsoo pleaded.

Tao sighed and took off his fake glasses. "Do Kyungsoo, I'm afraid you only have a week to live." He stood up and walked to the door. "I accept any form of Credit Card. I'll leave the bill right here." He placed it on the table and Tao walked out of the room.

"Kyungsoo..." Kai spoke with dark eyes. "Can I have some time to myself?" The older meekly smiled and left the room.

The fooled dancer looked down at the $300 bill and sighed. He buried his face in his hands and cried.

---------------------

The next day, Jongin gave Kyungsoo the $300 and told him to give it to the doctor. Kyungsoo made a fuss about Jongin paying the whole bill, but the younger would hear none of it.

"Excellent work, Brother D.O." Xiumin smiled at Kyungsoo, taking the money. "This should cover the $200 water damage to the floor Kris made after Jongin's last prank, but what should we do with the other $100?"

They all sat in TVXQ's boardroom once again, contemplating the $100, when a member of EXO came walking past the room. His eye caught sight of the members and he decided to eavesdrop when he heard them talking about money.

"Guys! Focus!" He heard Kyungsoo shout. "In case you haven't forgotten, I'm not actually dying in a week. What are we gonna do when Jongin comes down from his fanfic high and looks at reality?"

"Oh..." He saw the devilish member ponder, "Me and Brother Xiumin usually just keep going until we get in trouble..."

"That explains so much." Tao dead-panned at Chen's plan.

"Brothers..." Kris spoke up, "Let's just tell the brat that Kyungsoo had a miracle recovery. If he's dumb enough to believe us this far, then he'll probably believe us when we tell him Kyungsoo's gonna be alright." The 'brothers' gave a clap, snap, and chant in approval of Wu Fan's plan.

The member waiting outside the room was shocked to say the least. Of course he was a little freaked out too, but he was just concerned with the information he had just heard. He scurried off to make his own plans.

------------------------

"Jongin... you didn't have to take me to this nice restaurant..." Kyungsoo laughed, scratching his neck awkwardly.

"Rubbish!" Kai exclaimed, "It's your last week on Earth. We HAVE to do something special!" He grabbed Kyungsoo's hand and kissed it for the millionth time that week. Kyungsoo was slowly beginning to drown in guilt. He had no idea the younger cared for him this much!

"Baby..." Kyungsoo smiled at Jongin, "I just want you to know that whatever happens, I love you." Kai practically melted, remembering the fanfictions where Kyungsoo had said that same thing!

"The same goes for you, honey." Kai almost cried.

They ate their meal in comfortable silence, the closing of yet another day coming to quickly for Kyungsoo's taste. He would just be one more day closer to having to face the impending confrontation.

Suddenly, a rather tall waiter came up to them, placing two desserts in front of Jongin and Kyungsoo, "I'm sorry, sir, but we never this food." Kyungsoo apologized to the waiter.

The tall almost familiar-looking waiter shook his head and said, "Don't worry about it, this kind gentleman ordered them specifically for you." The tall, deep-voiced waiter pointed to Kai and walked away.

Kyungsoo looked down at his plate to see the delicious looking Turtle Ice Cream. He thought something was a little suspicious but thanked Kai and picked up his spoon.

"Um... Kyungsoo." Kai squeaked, pointing to something behind Kyungsoo, "Look."

The elder turned his head and looked in horror to see a respectable Sunbae standing at the front door of the restaurant. The Sunbae locked eyes contact with Kyungsoo and dashed toward the table.

Kyungsoo noticed the Sunbae looked fairly angry and he also noticed it was Changmin from TVXQ. 'Why in the world would he be here?' He though. He turned around to look at his Ice Cream. His Turtle Ice Cream. 'Oh .'

"Kyungsoo!" Changmin reached the table, growling, "I give you ONE rule, and you took my ICE CREAM! I'll ing kill you!" Changmin lunged for Kyungsoo. The small, younger man gave a little yelp and ducked under the table.

The aggressive maknae of TVXQ grabbed the singer's foot and yanked him out from under the table. "Your little 'Order of Dance alpaca, Kung-Fu Hoes' was so weird, I should have stored my food somewhere else. Why would you do this to me?!"

"Hyung! I swear! I never took your food!" Kyungsoo cried, a few inches off the ground due to Changmin hanging him in the air.

"CHANGMIN!" They heard a new voice yell. They all turned to see Yunho... holding a pizza. "Put. The kid. down." Yunho threatened, holding the warm pizza over a garbage bin.

The maknae dropped Kyungsoo on his head and followed Yunho out the door (but not before grabbing his Ice Cream first).

Kyungsoo stood up from the ground, he sent a quick text message to Chen and turned to Kai. "What the hell?!"

"What the hell yourself, babe. Give me my money back!" Jongin yelled to his boyfriend.

Kyungsoo frowned at Kai and stayed silent for a few moments, until finally saying, "How did you know? you're not THAT smart, honey."

Kai laughed sarcastically, but looked away and pouted, "Baekhyun heard you guys in TVXQ's room."

"Baekhyun? Why does he even care?!" Kyungsoo shouted.

"In case you haven't noticed, me and Baekhyun are tight now!" Jongin snickered at Kyungsoo who was obviously frustrated beyond belief.

Suddenly, Baekhyun appeared out of nowhere. "Seriously. Kyungsoo. Who else do you think could make Channie look that good?" Chanyeol stepped out from the bathroom at that time. Kyungsoo thought the waiter looked Familiar! "Honey, don't you mess with me. Mama's got claws!" Baekhyun hissed, putting his hands on his hips, arching his eyebrows with sass. "Now about the money-"

"As in, Jongin gets to keep $100? Here you go." Baekhyun jumped when he heard a new voice behind him. "Jongdae explained everything to me... Aish. Guys, why can't you just be normal kids?!" Their manager handed $100 to Kai.

"Hey! What about the other 200?" Jongin pouted, seeing Chen step out from behind the manager, sticking out his tongue.

"Well, isn't this funny," The manager laughed, "That's the same amount of money the repair guys needed to fix the floor from your little water prank on Wu Fan. Oh and look at this! It's the same amount I had to pay them and the SAME amount you just paid me. That's pretty funny to me." The manager frowned at them. "And just so you all know, yes, you're all in BIG trouble. Minseok too. I know he's in on this. Now get in the car!"

"But Wu Fan and Zitao-" Kai started.

"Shut up!" The manager yelled.

"I didn't do anything!" Chanyeol cried.

"Just get in the car." The manager sighed, handing a tissue to the crying sky scrapper.

On the ride home, Chen sent a quick text to Tao and Kris, "I hate you..."

After reading the short text, the two high-fived. "Told ya I was good at pranks." Tao laughed, sitting down with Kris to see what all the hype was about these fanfictions.

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Done. Please don't hate too much~