Everyone would say that they have a special bond between each other. It’s more than a partnership between colleagues, it’s more than a friendship, but it isn’t exactly a brotherly relationship. It’s something more yet also something less than what you can ever propose to describe what they have.

It’s hard to grasp any idea of what their connection could be when those occasional and probably spontaneous skinships are caught on camera. Some people were left wondering what on earth they would do once the cameras are turned off. Under the watchful eyes of their BABY, no interaction could be missed. Not the playful taps on the , the lifts and back hugs, the elder’s on the younger’s chin, the lyrics that just seemed to fit so well and definitely not the raging chemistry that happens every time they perform on stage, spouting words after words with their skilful mouth.

But even though all those moments provide so much evidence of their relationship, confirming something that had never been stated is impossible. Putting in mind their recognizable , their status as idols, non-existing private life and the obvious yet important fact that they are both men, it’s easier to say that the supposedly ‘real’ couple is as real as a spectral Pegasus.

Simply put, people can judge and try to guess but nobody will ever know about their relationship.

Himchan might be the king of skinship in the band but Junhong’s antics seems to bring out the urge in everyone to hug the youngest boy. Himchan and Daehyun would try to kiss the youngest in front of the camera, which Junhong swiftly dodged. Yongjae would fawn over the boy and take care of him as if he’s his own son. Jongup, being close in age to the boy and a naturally reserved person doesn’t display too much affection. But he surely tries to spend as much time with Junhong just dancing or chatting away.

The leader and eldest of the group is no exception. The usually quiet guy would seem to be so open towards Junhong. He would shower Junhong with praises and innocent touches which both would immediately enjoy. They were so frequent, so casual, so carefree to the point that the members got used to it already. But for the two of them every touch is always new, every word seems foreign yet enjoyable, every single thing is fresh and exciting.

And they had planned to keep it that way.

Until one unfortunate day, Junhong started pulling away from the elder. Their usual touches were no longer there. There were no spark between them anymore and Yongguk was more than devastated. Every time he would try to reach out for Junhong, the younger flinched as if he was scalded. Then he would look at Yongguk with a glint of sadness and doubt in his eyes before running away.

Yongguk didn’t know what he did to deserve such treatment from Junhong. He tried to reflect on his actions but he couldn’t find anything he did that was out of the ordinary.

Was it because he accidentally ate Junhong’s stash of cherry tomatoes? But he bought more for the boy after that and they went back to good terms.

Was it because he accidentally stepped on Junhong’s skateboard? But in the end he fell down on his , making Junhong laugh uncontrollably for hours.

Was it because he turned down Junhong’s invitation for lunch at their favorite café? But in the end he took him for dinner and treated him his favorite ice cream.

Was it because … Yongguk had been absent mindedly touching Junhong a little bit more these days? Ruffling his hair more often, praising him more often, even daring himself to intertwine their fingers in the van, giving him hugs every once in a while… Was it the problem? Was it why Junhong was refusing to his touches and probably … disgusted by the sight of Yongguk?

Yongguk needed answers. He couldn’t live like this anymore.

Junhong sat down on his bed, his head hung low. It took Yongguk a great trouble to have Junhong to be in the same room as his. And he wouldn’t waste this opportunity to figure out the problem between them.

“Won’t you please tell me what happened between us, Junhong?” Yongguk sighed. He kept his distance from the younger rapper, hoping that it would make him feel better. A long silence stretched between them.

“Junhong, I’m sorry if I ever did something to you. But can you tell me what I did wrong? I’ll try not to do it again.” Yongguk was pleading but it didn’t seem to affect the Junhong at all. Yongguk wanted to pull out his hair out of frustration.

“Dirty.” Junhong’s soft whisper echoed throughout the room.

“What?” Yongguk didn’t understand. Junhong finally looked up at him with glassy eyes.

“They said our relationship is dirty, hyung.” Junhong brought his hand to his face and he scrunched up his face. Yongguk stayed frozen in his place and waited for the boy to continue.

“Why would they say that?! They accused you of so many bad names just because you stayed close to me. How could they say all those stuff about you! They know nothing about you. They know nothing about us!”

“Junhong…” Yongguk tried to gather up words to say but his brain couldn’t function right.

“I don’t want them to say those stuff about you anymore. Maybe if I just stay away from you they would stop it. But it hurts, hyung. I don’t want to stay away from you. But I had to! Hyung, I had to… I did it all for you.” Yongguk sighed and walked over to him. He enveloped the younger in his embrace and Junhong returned the hug.

“Hyung, am I dirty? Are we dirty?” Junhong whimpered. Yongguk rubbed the younger boy’s back and let him rest his head on his shoulder.

“No, Junhong. Not an inch of you is dirty. Don’t listen to them. You said so yourself, they don’t know anything about us. They don’t have the right to judge us, Junhong. Don’t worry about it…” Junhong could only nod weakly. He wasn’t crying, he was just very upset over the whole incident.

“Remember, Junhong. They know nothing about us or our relationship.” Junhong nodded again and rested his arms around Yongguk’s neck.

“Absolutely nothing.”