He was burned, he was broken, not his usual demeanor. His life had been shattered.

He had been awoken in the middle of the night by the sound of regretful footsteps through the tiny apartment. He had stirred in his sleep, completely and utterly confused about the situation. He went out of his room to see his life, his everything, holding a simple white letter in his hand. It was from their doctor.

Feet shuffled. 

He held his breath. Deafening silence filled his ears, the echo of a door being closed clouding his mind, Silent tears filled his vision and blurred his sight, the promise of a smile fading with each second that passed. The monotone ticking sound of a clock filled the empty air of the hallway.

He was only clad in simply pajamas, too much in shock to even bother caring about shills going through his spine and goosebumps building up on his pale, thin arms. The moon shone bright through one of the minimal windows located on the wall opposite of the wall which he was leaning against. 

They used to be more than that. Long nights of coming up with meaningless song lyrics and air filled with the faded smell of pot. Sitting by the piano, a horrible writers block etching at their minds. They used to laugh at nothing, at each other, at love, but mostly, they didn't even bother to care.

Most often though, they didn't even think about the world around them. They rolled up just another cigarette for themselves. Staring at each other as their shared a smoke, no other thought in their mind but that the other one was just so perfectly beautiful.

As given, people grew worried. Heechul remembered Kangin asking what the hell they actually had going on these days, all locked up in their tiny apartment in the outskirts of Seoul. Hankyung had looked at Heechul with a grin adorning his features, gripping his hand and letting a small laugh leave his lips. No, they were not doing anything out of the ordinary.

They had nothing to worry about. Nothing in the world could stop them. But that was then. That was when Hankyung was still by his side, sending him loving smiles and comforting squeezes around his hand.

That was then, when Hankyung wasn't planning to die anytime soon.

Heechul absolutely hated people questioning whether or not he was fine. Because yes, he was fine indeed.

The funeral couldn't have been any better. The press was there, their irritating cameras up in Heechul's face. Fans, bringing fanboards with comforting texts were seated at the back. They shouted for Heechul, doing anything to make sure he was fine. Even Hankyung's parents, who had swore to themselves to never show any compassion about Hankyung, made it safely to Korea to say a final goodbye to their son. They had even given Heechul a pat on the back. Though Heechul could've sworn how their disgusted expressions returned to their faces at the realization that they touched a .

But no, Heechul was fine. He just laughed at the amount of crying people in the church. Because he didn't care.

He went home alone to his and Hankyung's apartment. Declining Donghae's offer to sleep at his and Eunseo's place with a smile, he'd left. Eunseo looked at him with pity, her hands giving a squeeze to his shoulder. Her eyebrows knotted together when he didn't even flinch. 

He had his pot. He could distract himself the best he wanted but he'd end up throwing up all of his stomach's content in the toilet bowl. But no, there was nothing wrong with him. He was fine, and he was not missing Hankyung.

Weeks passed. The absence of his everything was growing, an empty feeling building in his chest. No amount of white powder could stop the pain in his stomach.

But he wasn't missing him. He was just fine.

Jungmo, Kangin and a few others made sure to visit him sometimes. They gasped at Heechul's state. He had not bothered to clean up the powder around his nostrils, leaving it for them to clean up. He was obviously starting to thin out, his limbs almost too weak to even carry his body weight. His skin was gradually turning slightly grey from not going outside for several weeks. He vaguely remembered Kangin crying while lifting him to the bathtub to clean his dirtied body. His greasy hair was sticking to his forehead as a cold sweat spread over his body. His fever was getting worse.

He was once again left alone. The gnawing feeling in his chest had grown to the point where he couldn't stand it, but he didn't know the reason anymore. 

Blinding light came into his sight as he saw someone make their way towards his bed. It was an angel, Heechul's angel, his everything. Familiar hands made their way around his torso to lift him up into a sitting position.

"I'm back for you," Hankyung, the angel, uttered with a sigh. Heechul wrapped his arms around the angel and snuggled his head in the crook of his neck, letting out a sigh through his pinkish, plump lips. He was somewhat reminded of the times when Hankyung used to go out to clubs late at night, leaving Heechul waiting for him on the couch.

Heechul used to be worried, because he thought Hankyung would leave him. 

"Yeah... You have a tendency to come back."

Hankyung smiled, gripping Heechul's hands and making him stand up beside himself. Heechul saw the blinding light again, the shining sun embracing him. 

"I will always come back to you."