Starting Now…I Love You…
“I love you…” words from the bottom of my heart
“I love you,” Words that I would like to say again
A thousand times more…
Until now, I’ve given you nothing
So I want to give you more now
Words that I would only say to you…

Donghae was sitting curled up on the couch with a laptop in his lap.  His eyes scanned his mini homepage carefully reading the comments.  Each hate comment would cause him too frown and shrug it off while any cute message would cause him to break out into a smile.  Why was he doing this? He was bored out of his mind ever since they had stopped activities.  Everyone seemed to have something to do unfortunately that meant he had nothing to do.

Donghae soon got tired of using his laptop and set it on the table in front of him.  He grabbed the remote and the TV. There wasn’t much on, just some reruns of movies he had seen a billion times.  He jumped when he heard a sudden voice calling his name. He was blank for a couple of moments before getting off the couch and stretched a bit.  His long black hair still hadn’t been brushed down since he had been too lazy and figured there wasn’t much use because it was pretty late now. His bangs fell over his eyes as he lazily brushed them away.  He walked to the door peeking through the eye piece.

“Donghae, it’s me!” Siwon said knocking again.  Without a second thought Donghae had opened the door with a grin on his face.  “It’s a person!” Donghae said childishly before hugging Siwon who was a bit surprised. “Hyung, what’s wrong with you?” He asked arching an eyebrow. “Nothing…I’ve just been really lonely for the past few days…” Donghae said letting go and staring at what was in Siwon’s hands. “What did you bring?” Donghae asked a bit confused as Siwon closed the door with his back. “I had a day off so I thought we could watch a movie and you know make some pasta…” Siwon said smiling and setting the bags on the table.

“By ‘we’ you mean ‘me’ don’t you?” Donghae pouted crossing his arms.  Siwon grinned with a nod. “You’ll have to help me.” Donghae said pulling the contents out of the grocery bag. “Don’t I always?” Siwon asked sarcastically. “No you don’t!” Donghae emphasized. “What movie did you bring?” Donghae asked. Siwon looked through the bag and pulled it out. “I heard it was pretty scary so I was curious…” Siwon said handing him the DVD. The cover itself looked frightening. Donghae wasn’t sure if he could sit through another scary movie. The last one with Heechul had him scared for a week but nodded anyway.

“Should I start now?” Donghae asked. “Well my stomach isn’t going to fill itself.” Siwon replied. Donghae glared at him before grabbing a cooking pot and putting water inside from the tap. He set it on the stove and waited until the water was boiling before putting the pasta inside. All he really had to do now was wait. Siwon had known better than to try and force Donghae to make him pasta from scratch. Their last experience with a food processor didn’t turn out well. “Do you want anything else in it?” Donghae asked leaning against the counter.

“Let’s not push ourselves hyung, this is all we can really handle without Ryewook.” Siwon said with a grin. “It’ll take a while to make though…” Donghae said brushing his hair roughly. “Why not make some salad as a side dish? That goes well with pasta and it’ll keep you occupied.” Siwon suggested with a smile.  The very smile that revealed his cute dimple. Donghae suddenly felt his heart speed up and looked down. “Sure…” He said softly before walking over towards the refrigerator and pulling out some vegetables and a bowl. Of course it wouldn’t be an amazing gourmet salad that Siwon was probably used to since he did eat out most nights but it would be as simple and light as a salad could be.

Siwon leaned against the counter that Donghae had started cutting vegetables in. The older male had skilled hands when it came to cutting and cut the vegetables gracefully. “Do you want any bread crumbs?” Donghae asked with a smile. “Sure, I’ll get them.” Siwon said seeing he had the height advantage. Donghae continued to cut the vegetables, his long bangs falling over his face. Donghae tensed when he felt Siwon behind him. His arm extended to place the box of bread crumbs on the counter in front of Donghae. Donghae knew there was a faint blush on his cheeks and he lowered his gaze to hide it.

Siwon watched as his hyung cut the vegetables delicately with a smile. Truthfully he didn’t come to watch a movie; he came because he wanted more time with Donghae. His busy schedule barely allowed him to meet the boy. Donghae didn’t realize he was being watched so intensely because he was having a fight to overcome his feelings for Siwon. When had he started to realize he was attracted to his dongsaeng? Was it the day they met? Or after he started getting closer to him? Truthfully, Donghae wasn’t sure himself. But he knew his feelings wouldn’t be accepted.

After a couple of minutes of cutting he finally finished up and mixed it all into a bowl carelessly. “What sauces did you bring?” Donghae asked walking over towards a cabinet. It was out of his reach but he still wanted to try and grab the plates. He opened up the cabinet and got on his toes his fingers lightly grazing the plates that he wanted to reach. Siwon smiled widely before walking behind Donghae and grabbing his hand ignoring the jolt of electricity that pulsed through his veins leaving a familiar trail of warmth behind. He turned Donghae around so that his back was against the counter and was facing Siwon.

“I’ll get it hyung…” He said with a grin before extending his arm.  He closed the distance between them even more until their torsos were pressing against each other. Donghae continued to look down and his hair gave him the advantage of covering his face because he was sure he was blushing madly now. His heart was pounding in his chest. Was Siwon doing this on purpose? Donghae pondered as Siwon finally stopped pretending like he couldn’t reach and pulled two plates down moving away from Donghae and setting them on the counter and pretended to be interested in the boiling pasta.

Donghae felt his pulse returning back to normal and walked over to where Siwon was. “It looks ready.” Donghae said smiling. “Should we check?” Siwon asked before opening his mouth. “There is no sauce on it.” Donghae said. “It doesn’t matter…” Siwon said and childishly opened his mouth again. Donghae tried not to blush but his dongsaeng was really out of control today. He grabbed a fork and picked a piece of pasta out of the water and blew on it so it would cool down before feeding it to Siwon. “Its done I’ll get the sauces.” Siwon said rushing over to the bags and pulling out a wide variety. Meanwhile, Donghae carefully drained the pasta and placed an equal amount on each plate.

“Siwon why did you bring so many when you knew we both would take tomato?” Donghae questioned pouring the sauce on top. “I wanted to give you a choice.” Siwon explained grabbing two wine glasses and pouring some red wine into them. He set them on the table and sat down and started to eat. Donghae sat next to him feeling a flutter in his heart as he waited for Siwon’s response. Siwon noticed the stare he was getting and smiled. “It’s good now start eating before it gets cold.” Donghae instantly grinned and started to eat.

After the two finished Siwon had cleared the table while Donghae had started the dishes. He rolled up his sleeves and the tap. The warm water started to sooth his hands as he washed the dishes carefully. Siwon waited standing behind Donghae and examined the older male’s figure. Honestly he was just tempting him with his frail shoulders and feminine waist. Before he could stop himself he had wrapped his arms firmly around Donghae’s waist and had rested his chin on Donghae’s shoulder. “Siwon…” Donghae called out while Siwon didn’t move.

Donghae’s pulse had increased yet again. Why was the male doing this to him? Surely he didn’t realize Donghae had feelings for him…but it was pretty obvious. How he would tense at Siwon’s touch, blush around the male and pretty much need to stop and breathe after seeing his smile. He wouldn’t be surprised if Siwon did know and was teasing him.  Nevertheless he continued washing the dishes. When he finished he grabbed a towel and dried his hands. Siwon who hadn’t let go of Donghae since loosened his grip so the male could turn around face him.

When Donghae did turn around Siwon’s grip tightened. All he could hear was the rapid sounds of both their heartbeats in sync. A rhythm that could only mean on thing…love. “Hyung, don’t take this as me being childish or erted…don’t be offended.” Siwon said softly in Donghae’s ear. His warm breath creeping down Donghae’s spine. Donghae stared up at the taller male’s eyes before seeing him bend down closing the distance between them. Siwon’s grip on Donghae’s waist tightened as he pulled him closer.

Siwon lightly pressed his lips on Donghae’s waiting to see a reaction.  Eventually, Donghae awoke from his stunned phase and slowly opened his mouth giving Siwon an entrance. Siwon didn’t wait a second and roughly let his tongue enter the hot cavern. Siwon explored every bit of Donghae’s mouth as his blood intensified at the soft moan he earned from Donghae when he started to on his lower lip. Donghae had wrapped his arms around Siwon’s neck pulling the male closer and even went on his toes because Siwon had the height advantage. After a couple more moans escaping Donghae’s lips Siwon pulled away. The soft feel of Donghae’s lips lingered on his for a moment as he watched the older male breath, his forehead pressed against Siwon’s chest.

“Hyung, I’m sorry-” But Donghae cut Siwon off. “I like you…” He said and tears threatened to fall down the male’s cheeks. A faint blush could still be seen on his cheeks. “I like you so much…that it hurts sometimes.” His throat was starting to tighten. “Why didn’t you say anything?” Siwon asked softly cupping Donghae’s jaw and pulling him closer. “I thought…I was…” But that’s all it took for the group’s crybaby to shed tears. “I understand…don’t say anymore.” Siwon said softly before bending down and pecking Donghae’s lips lightly and pulling him into a hug.  He delicately Donghae’s hair.

"I love you..." Siwon said with a smile.

“I love you…” words from the bottom of my heart
“I love you,” Words that I would like to say again
A thousand times more…
Until now, I’ve given you nothing
So I want to give you more now
Words that I would only say to you…