word count - 2,745w

"Sometimes, you hurt the ones who love you the most. And sometimes, you hold the ones who leave you lost. And sometimes you learn, but it's too late. It seems too late, it always does, but is it? There's always a second chance, and after the rain, comes the rainbow."

"You don't get it!" Dongwoo said in frustration.

"What? Tell me what I don't get! You always make me so confused, do you know that?" Hoya replied, equally frustrated.

The two of them were in Hoya and Sungjong's room and it was Dongwoo's near hundred attempt at trying to tell Hoya his true feelings and what he wanted them to be.

But Dongwoo, being the type of person who was never good with words, just hoped Hoya would be able to read his mind, but obviously, Hoya couldn't.

"You know what? Forget it. I j-just. Just forget it." Dongwoo said and left the room, leaving Hoya confused and clueless as to what just happened.

"Argh, Jang Dongwoo!" Hoya shouts in frustration as he punches his bed out of anger.

Closing the door behind him, Dongwoo heaves a sigh, blaming himself for never having the courage to tell Hoya that he wishes for them to have a stable relationship, that he wants everyone to know that he loves Hoya and Hoya loves him too.

But to Hoya, their relationship is merely good buddies who may have feelings for each other and to Hoya, stable relationships aren't his thing and loving someone with your whole life just seems dumb.

In comparison, Dongwoo believes he has found his one true love. He loves Hoya, but Hoya doesn't love him back the same way.

"Hyung?" Dongwoo hears a deep and husky but soft voice and he turns to see Woohyun looking at him with a worried gaze.

"Is everything alright with Hoya?" Woohyun asks once again, massaging Dongwoo's temple, because apparently his face was so tensed up and that only happens when Dongwoo is really stressed out and something is troubling him.

"I don't know... Everything just seems wrong nowadays." Dongwoo replies softly and the hurt is laced in his voice.

"Maybe you should just talk with him?" Woohyun says.

"That's what I've been trying to do, and obviously it's not going well." Dongwoo replies and lowers his head.

Woohyun gently pats Dongwoo's back, and out of the corner of his eye, he spots Sunggyu walk out of their room lazily.

Sunggyu rubs his eyes with his mouth formed in a pout and Woohyun chuckles at Sunggyu's cute form whenever he wakes up from a nap.

Opening his eyes slowly, Sunggyu squints his eyes and upon seeing Woohyun, starts to call his name when he notices Dongwoo in Woohyun's arms and how Woohyun is shooting glances at Hoya and Sungjong's room.

Sunggyu gets it immediately, he always does, he's one with little words and if he isn't involved in something, he wouldn't care about it.

It's not like Dongwoo and Hoya's complicated relationship isn't known to the members anyway. Their feelings for each other are so obvious that sometimes all the members want to do is to lock them up in the room and wait for something to happen, but from seeing how when that happens, it always ends up with Hoya enraged and Dongwoo on the verge of crying, it's not a plausible idea.

Sighing, Sunggyu walks towards the kitchen to get a glass of water. He couldn't do anything anyways.

As the leader, his job was to keep the group in order and to prevent anything from affecting the group's dynamics and even though Dongwoo and Hoya's relationship was complicated and had ups and downs (well more downs recently), they were Infinite H, and they had a special connection, just like him and Woohyun as well as Myungsoo and Sungyeol had. Breaking them up or pulling them apart was not an option. He just hopes that they will just realize that they freaking love each other and confirm their relationship. Soon.

As Sunggyu is half way through drinking his water, Hoya bursts out of the room, shoots a glare at Woohyun and Dongwoo before going into the kitchen and pouring himself a glass of water. He stares at Woohyun and Dongwoo as he gulps down the glass of water furiously.

He looks over at Sunggyu who had his eyes half closed, well it looked that way.

"Hyung. Aren't you jealous when you see Woohyun and Dongwoo like that?" Hoya asks.

Sunggyu chuckles and replies, "Why should I be? I trust Woohyun, and you know how much he loves his Hyung. Dongwoo's like this because of you anyway."

"What? It's not my fault!" Hoya says angrily, but Sunggyu just walks out of the kitchen and goes over to Woohyun and Dongwoo to ask if they want some breakfast.

To Hoya, a couple type of relationship meant commitment. And to Hoya, commitment was never a good thing. The only thing he was committed to was dancing and rapping. Growing up in a dysfunctional family, commitment had no meaning to him, and it was only something that could cause people to stray away from each other. He believes he likes Dongwoo. He knows he likes Dongwoo. But there's always that something that stops him from breaching the line of 'like' into 'love'. Hoya's not ready, he never was, and who knows if he ever will?

"You know Hyung, you're just hurting both Dongwoo and yourself, well Dongwoo's hurting more but still." Sungjong casually remarks as he walks into the kitchen and Hoya runs his fingers through his hair, annoyed. "Just shut up Sungjong." He sneers at Sungjong and walks back into his room, making sure to slam his door.

As Sunggyu and Woohyun sit on either sides of Dongwoo on the sofa, Sunggyu lazily changing the channels of the TV while Woohyun was still patting Dongwoo's back softly, Myungsoo and Sungyeol appeared from their room, giggling.

It was  a free schedule day for them for months and all the Infinite members could have the energy to do was to just laze around at home.

The Myungyeol couple were forever oblivious to anything that was happening in the dorm as they just live in their own world every day. They both have bed hair and are both giggling at some inside joke and as soon as they see Sunggyu, Woohyun and Dongwoo, they both say good morning together and laugh once more at their tacit response.

Seeing the two lovebirds as happy as ever, Dongwoo's face crumpled and muffled sobs started to be heard as he buried his face into his knees. Woohyun, his heart breaking at seeing his beloved Hyung so vulnerable, immediately wrapped his arms around Dongwoo to try to calm him down.

Sunggyu shook his head at the sight, "Can you two take your mushiness and whatsoever somewhere else?"

Sungyeol pouted, but Myungsoo, obviously the more sensible of the two, nudged him and they both walked towards the kitchen where Sungjong was.

"Why is Dongwoo Hyung like this again? It's like the 2nd time this month." Sungyeol whispers and looks at Sungjong, waiting for an answer.

"Who else?" Sungjong replies, not even looking up from his book that he was reading on the kitchen counter.

"Who, Myung, Who? Tell me!" Sungyeol whines and turns to Myungsoo.

"Yeol, who else? Of course it's Hoya hyung! I cannot believe that up till now, he still refuses to admit his love for Dongwoo..." Myungsoo says and shakes his head in disbelief.

"Why can't Hoya Hyung and Dongwoo Hyung be like us, Myung?" Sungyeol asks and Myungsoo can't help me chuckle at his innocence and cute expression on his face.

"Yeol, not all relationships are like ours, okay? It's just we like to express ourselves more, look at Woohyun Hyung and Sunggyu Hyung, their in love too, well I doubt that sometimes, but it's probably because they don't show it much, but if you just look at how Woohyun Hyung gazes at Sunggyu Hyung and those subtle caring gestures Sunggyu Hyung does, it's pretty obvious. For Dongwoo Hyung and Hoya Hyung...I don't know. They obviously love each other! But apparently there's just something that's not right." Myungsoo says and Sungyeol just rests his head on Myungsoo's shoulder.

Sungjong shakes his head at them and retreats to his room, to find that Hoya has locked the door. Putting his hands up in exasperation, he finds some corner in the living room to read his book.

Overhearing Myungsoo, Woohyun's hand pauses on top of Dongwoo's hand. 'well I doubt that sometimes'. It's true that Sunggyu doesn't like to show public affection, and he's okay with that, but sometimes, those insecure thoughts gnaw at him and he can't help to worry that to Sunggyu, their relationship wasn't important. Despite an over confident arrogant prick most of the times, Woohyun is okay with anything but Sunggyu losing interest in him. He was insecure in that way.

"Gyu." Woohyun whispers as he hears Dongwoo's light snoring, signaling that Dongwoo has fallen asleep on his lap.

Sunggyu who was watching the TV with a bored expression, looked towards Woohyun and cocked his head to a side.

Woohyun quickly gives him a peck on the lips and whispers, "You know I love you right?"

Sunggyu was stunned at the kiss, but at Woohyun's words, and the way his eyebrows are creased and his brow furrowed with worry, staring at him with those puppy eyes, Sunggyu understands. Woohyun was an insecure kid, he knew that from the first day he met him.

Still waiting for a reaction from Sunggyu, Woohyun's lips start to tremble, and Sunggyu quickly reaches out to softly caress his face and proceeds to kiss Woohyun softly on the lips.

Immediately, Woohyun's face lights up and to make sure the smile stays on Woohyun's face, Sunggyu interlocks their fingers together and even lets Woohyun rest his head on his shoulder.

After that, Dongwoo always sticks around Woohyun and Sunggyu.

Even though Dongwoo and Hoya act like nothing's wrong, how can everyone else ignoring when Infinite's rapper line isn't matching up with each other?

Watching Hoya and Dongwoo sit on opposites sides of the practice room and trying their best to avoid each other, Sunggyu can't help but sigh. Myungsoo and Sungyeol as always, are oblivious about their surroundings and laughing about some joke, Sungjong is sitting next to Hoya and reading this book he's been fascinated with since a few days ago and Dongwoo's sitting alone...wait. Where's Woohyun?

At that moment, Sunggyu feels a familiar scent next to him and he smiles when he feels Woohyun's head resting softly on his shoulder.

It's times like this when Woohyun wishes time could stop.

Everything feels better with Sunggyu by his side, but as he sees the distance separating Hoya and Dongwoo, he feels so useless due to the fact that he is unable to do anything to bring them together again.

"Stop it." Sunggyu whispers.

Being the person who knows Woohyun the best, he obviously knew how Woohyun was a constant worrier and put other people before himself.

Dongwoo steals a glance across the room and finds Hoya snickering at something Sungjong told him.

Why does it always feel like he is the only one suffering when they have their cold arguments? Hoya never seems to mind the fact that he is ignored by Dongwoo, but to Dongwoo, it's killing him from the inside.

To not be able to smell Hoya's scent, hear his charismatic voice directed at him, hear his laughter, and just the fact of not being able to have Hoya's company kills him.

Despite looking calm on the outside, Hoya was breaking apart on the inside, and is starting to doubt himself.

If only he could commit to a relationship, if only he had more been more patient with Dongwoo, if only he could tell Dongwoo how much he loved him, if only.

He spots Sungyeol sitting on the sofa, alone, watching TV, and wonders why the dorm seems so quiet.

"Yeol, Where's the other members?" Hoya asks as he settles on the armrest of the sofa.

"Sunggyu Hyung and Woohyun Hyung have vocal practice, Sungjong is at the bookstore, again, and Myung has some drama script reading thing." Sungyeol replies and pouts when he mentions Myungsoo's name.

Wait. So Dongwoo was in the dorm. But where is he?

Hoya is about to turn the doorknob of Myungyeol and Dongwoo's shared room when he hears muffled sobs from inside.

He opens the door slightly so there's only a small gap and he sees Dongwoo sitting cross legged on his bed, clutching a photograph, with tears streaming down his cheeks.

Hoya literally feels his heart break.

He knows how emotional his Hyung can be, and Dongwoo's tears always affect him in a way that he feels as if he is constantly getting stabbed in the heart.

How can someone make Dongwoo cry? Someone as precious and vulnerable as Dongwoo?

Without saying a word, Hoya closes the door behind him as he lets himself into the room and immediately takes Dongwoo into his arms.

Dongwoo, shocked as he did not hear a sound, is stunned into silence, but immediately leans into Hoya's built frame. Dongwoo has missed this too much.

Hoya catches a glimpse of the photograph on the bed, which was taken during Infinite H's first special stage, and Hoya can't help but remember the amazing memories they had as Infinite H.

"We beat Teen Top! Just us two!" Dongwoo exclaims happily and Hoya just smiles at his Hyung's current childish but cute behavior. He knows how hard Dongwoo has been working these past few weeks to get the dance steps perfect, and it all paid off. As Dongwoo is kissing him on the lips softly for the first time that night, Hoya can't help but wish for more schedules as Infinite H. Where there's only him and Dongwoo.

It's not that he doesn't love infinite together, it's just that Jang Dongwoo will always hold a special place in his heart.

To everyone else, Jang Dongwoo may be that toothy grin dinosaur, but to Hoya, Dongwoo was his best friend, his partner, someone he couldn't live without.

"Hyung, I'm so sorry, I've been so selfish, only caring about my own feelings, never caring of what you really wanted- no- what would be the best for us, I-" Hoya says, choking on his own words.

Dongwoo just gently pats Hoya's back as he nuzzles his face closer into the dip of Hoya's neck and Hoya knows it's Dongwoo's way of saying 'it's okay' and that everything was alright now.

"Oh my god, I was getting worried, I'm so glad you guys are okay now. You've had Woohyun so stressed out that he's become so clingy..." Sunggyu says and whispers the last part about Woohyun before a voice can be heard calling for Gyu Hyung.

"Isn't it a good thing though? I've never seen Woohyun and Sunggyu Hyung like this before, their closer than ever." Dongwoo says and Hoya nods and tightens his arms around Dongwoo and kisses the skin just below Dongwoo's ear which causes Dongwoo to shiver.

"Ho-baby, don't." Dongwoo says, but giggles.

When Dongwoo reads out Hoya's short message for him in ranking king, everyone acts as if they do not know what happened and Dongwoo's blushing like crazy, unbelieving the fact that Hoya wrote something like this on a variety show.

Later on when the cameras are off, Hoya makes sure to give Dongwoo a deep kiss on the lips to further emphasize his message's meaning and Dongwoo is smiling throughout the whole ride home.

"After the rain, the soil solidifies and our relationship has become more firm~"

"Why have you become so greasy like Woohyun?"

"Well, look at the effects it has on Sunggyu Hyung! Gyu Hyung is so weak when it comes to anything related to Woohyun now."

"Don't even think about me becoming like that, Ho-baby."

"Don't worry, I'll love you nevertheless, you know that right?"

"Shut up. Don't speak. Too much grease. Urgh."

"I-"

"I said shut up Ho-baby!"

"I have to say it! I love you, I love you more than Woohyun loves Sunggyu, and that means a lot, right?"

"Ho-baby..."

"What? It does, I mean Woohyun is like a love sick puppy and-"

-

"See, that's better."

"No fair, you're not allowed to kiss me when I'm talking!"

secretly i love this fic to bits/ idek, its my first try writing yadong so ;A;