I gulped down some water and swallowed.

The small bottle I tossed in the carry-on bag reminded me I was leaving soon.

Sighing, I picked up my phone. I needed to do this. "Dongwoo oppa!" I shouted with the best aegyo I had. It was almost never used, but today there wasn't a choice.

"What are you doing right now?" Soft laughter came through. "Studying. But why are you still awake?" "Couldn't sleep."  I was lying, but I chose to ignore the unsettling gulit that grew inside me. "Do you need me to sing you to sleep?" "Ne!"

I just loved his voice. It helped me forget all my worries, even just for a bit.

"What song so you want me to sing?" "My lullaby!" He laughed once more when he heard me call out the song he wrote for me years ago. "Should I even have to ask?" He cleared his throat and sang.

"Baby goodnight, jaljayo goodnight. Then we'll be dancing, dancing, dancing in the moonlight." As the final notes rang out, I thanked him. "No problem Minyoung-ah. Now off to bed with you!" He ordered playfully. "Ne Dongwoo-oppa!" I  hesitated, "And, sorry for bothering you..." "It's never a bother, sleep well." Our conversation ended.

I turned to face my mirror.

My long black hair was cut just below my shoulders and had been dyed light brown. The new cream-colored dress I wore suited my figure nicely, definitely an upgrade from my oversized hoodie. To match, neutral colored heels were strapped on. Adding to that, a pair of contacts replaced the usual thick-rimmed glasses that graced my face.  Somehow, I didn't look like my regular self... Who was this person?

Pounding on the door woke me from the shock. "Min-Min! You ready?" "Just a second!" I shouted as I unlocked the door for my friend Yina. "So, what do you think?" "Amazing! Now let's go!" I quickly applied lip gloss and grabbed my bag. "Okay, ready." I followed Yina to her car and jumped in. "Sorry oppa, I can't be sleeping tonight."

"So.. what should we do first?" I was too distracted to reply.

Amazing.

Even now the familiar city lights were still just as beautiful... This might be the last time I'll see them... 

"Min-min?" "Ah, sorry." I guessed I had spaced out... "But this was your idea, I thought you had something planned?" "Well, a friend of mine is a DJ at this club. I think they're having some kind of theme night today." "Sounds fun." I didn't care one way or the other, but I wanted Yina to have fun.

Who knows when we'll spend time together again?

"We're here!" Yina jumped out of her car and asked me to wait. "Are you sure I can leave you alone? You won't black out right?" Worry painted her face. I nodded. "Okay, I'll ask my friend if he could give us passes!" She yelled as she dashed off, cutting in front of a very confused line. I was glad to have a moment to myself, my body still felt a little weak.

Appa says Umma was like this too. I wished I still remembered her, she had died when I was just a baby. At least I knew where her grave was. How could I forget?

 

I tried to visit Umma's grave by myself, yet ended up lost. I wandered around alone and thought I wouldn't find my way out. Until I heard singing... My body gravitated towards the voice, and found the boy who had sung so beautifully. I stood behind him as he finished his song. "Hmm?" Our eyes met for briefly. He smiled "Shin Dongwoo. What about you?" I smiled back softly "Lee Minyoung..."

 

"Minyoung!" Yina called. "Come on! We're in!" She was right, tonight was definitely a theme night. As soon as we entered we were transported to a place straight out of a Western movie, but with a clubbing atmosphere. Not wanting to waste time, we danced to every song. How long had it been since I moved that much? Eventually, I felt weak again. "Hey." A guy dressed up as a cowboy approached me just as I was about to sit down. Yina smirked "I'm going to hang out with my friend for awhile." "Yah, wait!" Too late, she dashed off leaving me with a very boring flirt...

 

With Appa always working, Dongwoo oppa made it his mission to look out for me. With him around, I was never bored. "Minyoung!" He shouted worried seeing me run down the stairs. "Careful!" I didn't listen and ended up tripping. "I told you!" "Sorry Oppa! I'm just really excited!" It was my first day of high school and for the first time, we were walking to school together. He laughed and patted my head. I sighed as I fixed my hair back in place... He didn't notice the makeup I wore... I guess I was always a kid to him...

 

Another guy similarly dressed stepped in to save the day. "Excuse me miss, are you busy?" He glared at the other guy and scared him off. "Thanks..."  "No problem, you looked like you needed saving. CNU" He introduced himself. "CNU?" "Its my stage name. But enough about me, your name is...?" I laughed a little.

Great, another trainee.

"Min." I stood up and looked at the stranger.

My heart nearly stopped. He looked just like Dongwoo oppa... No... It couldn't have been him. Oppa didn't have light brown hair, he never bothered to style it, and he certainly didn't have earrings... Plus, this guy didn't wear glasses. Oppa ALWAYS had his glasses. I kept myself from freaking out. This was Korea... Look-a-likes are everywhere.

"Look, thanks for that, but I really shouldn't be talking to you. I have a boyfriend." CNU laughed, "So? I have a girlfriend, yet here we are." He motioned around the club. He had a point, but I still! I had to admit though, this guy was a much better version of Dongwoo. But I will not be swayed. When he saw that I meant what I said, he just shrugged. "Can I at least take you out for ice cream?"

Free ice cream? I nodded slowly "Okay, as long as it's just ice cream."  I sent Yina a quick text letting her know I was going somewhere. "Have fun ;)" she replied. I chuckled and texted back, "It's just for ice cream..." "That's what you said last time ;)"

 

"Are you really going to leave me for ice cream?" Yina asked. "Mianhae!" I ran off to Dongwoo.My high school graduation ceremony just ended. Dongwoo skipped some college classes and an audtion to be with me on this special day. I couldn't say no. "Come on Minyoung!" His eyes sparkled as he spoke. I had never seen him so excited... After I had finished my treat, he reached for my hands and held them together. "Minyoung, do you want to be my girlfriend?" I smiled. "Babo... You're too slow..."

 

CNU threw his arm over my shoulders. "Sorry, I hope I'm not moving to fast. I just didn't want those guys to think you were alone." A small group of four looked at us as we left, and it seemed like they were cheering. Were they his friends? "It's fine." I should have yanked his arm off, but there was something comforting about it that made me feel like I was in high school again. What the heck was this guy doing to me?

The street we happened upon was lively with shoppers and street venders. Spotting a bench not to far off, CNU asked me to sit and wait. "Why?" I asked confused, "You looked tired. Besides, this way I won't lose you in the crowd." He ran off to a ice cream cart not to far away. I watched as he thought about what flavor to get me, his face looked so funny, I couldn't help but laugh. "What's so funny?" He asked as he came back with a scoop of strawberry. "Nothing!" My plan was to leave right after ice cream, but CNU was just so silly and charming, I didn't want to.

 

"Oppa... I'm leaving...." I sighed. We were supposed to be on a date, but Jinyoung had dropped by and had a new idea for a song. Dongwoo seemed to forget that I was there and didn't even bother to say goodbye as I walked out the door. "Aigoo..." I sighed, "How many times has it been this month?" He finally passes his audition and was now a trainee, but as his dreams were coming true, I found myself not wanting to be around him. Unlocked the door to my house and slammed the door frustrated. "I shouldn't be like this..."

 

I spent more time than I should have with CNU, but I couldn't help it. Hours passed as we walked and talked. We heard faint music playing and saw a crowd surrounding a street concert. I saw him smile and I knew he couldn't help but ask. "So Miss Min, would you care to dance?" I couldn't help myself.

Sorry Oppa.

Step by step, we moved to the soft music. It felt like a fairytale. To dance with someone and feeling like the world had vanished, I never felt this way, not even with Dongwoo. I didn't care about Dongwoo. Right now, it was just me and this boy. You would think I just fell in love... I guess I did for a moment... He twirled me around and began to sing. "We'll be dancing, dancing, dancing in the moonlight...."

My lullaby.

His voice.

"Is something wrong Min?" He asked concerned. I shouldn't have been so shocked. My head suddenly felt light and my legs were shaky. I pulled back."It couldn't have been..." I thought. My vision began to blur. Everything began to grow dark. 

There was nothing anyone could have done.

 

Appa's face grew stiff as the doctor explained the seriousness of the problem. "Minyoung is already at Stage 4, there's nothing we can do." "Are you sure?" Appa asked. The doctor nodded, then added. "But, there's a place in the States that has a experimental treatment that might work...."

"Are you really going?" Yina asked. "I don't have a choice. Appa is already there making arrangements." I threw some clothes into a luggage bag. My friend sat quietly for a moment. "Have you told Dongwoo?" I stopped packing. "Aniya...." Yina threw a pillow at me and shouted. "Yah! You're dying! Your boyfriend has a right to know!" I laughed bitterly "He doesn't need me to distract him, not when he's so close to his debut..."

"Min-Min... Let's go out tomorrow! We haven't had a Girl's Night since high school! We can forget everything and pretend like we're single!" I hesitated. "Okay..." "Great! We need to have a complete makeover! You can cut your hair and...!" My friend went on about how we should dress for our night before she realized that I wasn't exactly 'okay' "Are you sure you'll be fine?" I took my medicine and showed off the bottle. "I'll be fine."

 

"Min..." A gentle voice called. I opened my eyes and found myself lying down on CNU's, no Dongwoo's, lap. He looked so sacred. "Are you okay?" I nodded. "You should have told me that you weren't feeling good! I wouldn't have asked you to dance." I shook my head and smiled "See? I'm fine!" Oppa pulled me into a hug. I pulled back. Technically, he was cheating on me. Then again, I was cheating on him. "I'm sorry. I really can't so this..."

He looked confused as I stood up and tried to walk away, but I stumbled. Opps caught me. "Careful." He whispered. "Don't-!" He cut me off. "You're not feeling good right now. So let me help you get back to the club. You have a friend waiting right?" Still as kind as ever....

The walk back was quiet. I didn't know what to say. "You felt something back then didn't you?" He finally asked. I blushed. "I'll take that as a yes." He smiled. "You're the first person I've felt like this for..." I laughed "Tell that to your girlfriend." "I'll break up with my girlfriend!" I shook my head, trying to hide a smile "This really won't work..."

If we broke up with each other, to be with each other, wouldn't that contradict everything?

CNU pulled me into a photo booth outside the club. "At least give me something to you remember you by." A few flashes and exchanging of pictures later, we parted ways. One day, I would have to tell Oppa about this. I bet he won't believe me.

I'll just have to show him this then.

Stars began to fade as Yina drove back to my house. We talked about our nights. Yina seemed to have met Jinyoung and I explained the silly situation I found myself in with my boyfriend. "So are you going to tell him about this?" "Not yet... I'll have to survive the trip first."

My house came into view too quickly. We tried to contain our tears by focusing on the happy things. "Good luck with Jinyoung!" "Good luck with your treatment!" "Fighting!" We both cheered.

Tonight I fell in love with someone who I had already loved. My boyfriend, not knowing it was me, said he loved me. My hands were shaking, but I think I'll be okay... I could leave with this memory when we 'danced in the moonlight'

I called him again before I went to sleep. "Oppa can you sing Baby Goodnight...?"

CNU/Dongwoo's POV

The guys would come over to my place after a had day of training to change into some fancy clubbing outfits before going out.

 

"Come on hyung!" Jinyoung asked. "Just come with us! You don't need to tell Minyoung about this!" The others agreed. "I bet you can get rid of this nerdy image and be really popular with the girls!" Baro thought. Sandul took off my glasses and Gongchan fixed my hair. "YAH!" I shouted. "Hyung, have fun for once!" I sighed "Fine, just this once!"

 

After that first night, I couldn't help myself from going with them. They were right, I was the best at picking up girls. When I picked up Min that night, I didn't intend to do anything other than flirt. Minyoung was still my girlfriend, and I really did care for her.

But there was something about the way she talked, the way she laughed... There was something about the little things she did that made me forget Minyoung. It wasn't in the cards for us though. Min had a boyfriend, and she kept insisting that things wouldn't work out between us.

"Aish! What am I doing?" I thought as I threw our picture on my table "Minyoung would kill me if she found out..." I checked my phone, nothing. Normally she would have called or texted me, I know she could have been sick but it's been a whole week... I hope she isn't mad at me for being so busy....

I finished applying the tempory hair dye, the kind that washes out, traded my glasses for contacts, and added some earrings. It wasn't a theme night so we didn't have to dress up so strange. Thank goodness, people kept looking at us last time... Once again, I became CNU. I ditched kmy geeky image and threw out thoughts of missing Minyoung out the door. A girl I noticed staring walked over to Jinyoung.

"Yina?" He asked surprised, "What are you doing back here?" I recognized the name, Yina was Minyoung's friend and Jinyoung's girlfriend. "I'm looking for Dongwoo... I know he's with you."  Jinyoung hesitated before pointing at my direction. "Dongwoo?" she asked. "Ne..." I felt something hit my face.

A slap.

I was caught. But did Minyoung know?

Jinyoung held Yina, trying to keep her calm. "I'm fine... I just can't believe you guys do this...." "We don't do anything other than flirt..." Jinyoung whispered. "Is something wrong?" The girl nodded and turned to me. She handed me a card with an address, "Just go here.... Jinyoung-oppa, I'll call you later..." Jinyoung chased after her and left me with three very confused guys.

The next morning, I went to the address. A hospital? Minyoung.... No, she would have told me if it was something this serious..... Yina was waiting there, "Good. You're here. Follow me." She commanded. A few halls away, we came to a room filled with balloons and flowers. Sunshine seemed to cast an awkward cheery shadow over the obviously dark mood.

"Minyoung!" I ran to her bedside. "Don't bother... She's won't wake up..." Yina sighed. "What's wrong?!" I demanded. "Cancer. Stage 4." Minyoung hadn't said anything..... Yet, knowing her... She wouldn't have....

 

I went to visit Minyoung after I realized she left. Jinyoung and I were just so busy with songs that I forgot all about her. "Minyoung-ah... Sorry..." She opened the door. "You don't have to be sorry Oppa. I shouldn't be bothering you so much anyway." "Yah! You're never a bother!" I yelled. Always blaming herself... Always not wanting me to be worried... "Minyoung, let's go on a date." She brighten for a moment, but hesitated. "No, we shouldn't. You have practice today." "Stop thinking about me and be selfish for once..."

 

"Tell me what happened." I asked frustrated. "She was diagnosed about 2 weeks ago after her first black out. The doctors told her about a experimental treatment in America, so she was leaving. But on the flight there, Minyoung out and the plane had to make an emergency landing. She hasn't woken up since... Even if she does, she can't leave for treatment, so all we can do is wait..."

"Where's her Appa?" I asked looking over Minyoung. "Here," Yina pulled out her phone, "He just got here from America. I'll be back he doesn't know where her room is." She informed me before leaving me with my girlfriend.

"I'm sorry Minyoung...." I bowed my head and held her hand. "I'm so sorry..."

I looked at the bedside table and looked at all the pictures Yina brought in. "I remember all of these." I smiled thinking about our childhood. All these pictures were so familiar too me, it wasn't hard to find the odd one out... This shouldn't have been here though. This picture should have belonged to Min.

I pulled out the matching picture from my wallet. I looked back at Minyoung. "How could I have not seen this?"

Min was Minyoung....

I began to piece together our conversations. I began to see Minyoung in the picture instead of Min. She looked so different the other night, I bet Yina had something to do with that.

Aish, I was a really horrible boyfriend. Why didn't she say anything? Is that why she kept saying it wouldn't work between us? Was it because we were already together?

"Minyoung, you will never let me live this down..." I mumbled as I brushed a stand of hair away from her face. 

"Dongwoo!" Her appa called my name. "Apeoji!" I greeted him with a bow. "I'm sorry, this must have come as a shock to you. But Minyoung insisted." "It's fine, it sounds like something she would do..." Appa laughed. "Her mother was like that too. Hey, I want to thank you. You became a trainee and still managed to keep an eye out for her." I nodded not knowing what to say. "I need to go talk to the doctor. Can you watch her?" "Of course. I always will."

 

It was my last year of high school when I realized I loved her. I asked her appa for permission. I thought it would easy. We were already neighbors and best friends, yet he had to strike a deal with me "Can you wait a few years?" I blinked a little surprised, but agreed. "You're going to be really busy if you pursue music. I just want to see if you can always be there for her." "Ne Appa, I understand.."

 

I visited Minyoung everyday, hoping that she would wake up. I would fluff her pillows and talk about my day. Basically, everything you would see a guy do for their girlfriend in a drama. After the hospital, I stopped clubbing with the guys. Instead I spent every moment I could with her, sometimes I would beg the staff to let me spend the night. I did that everyday for a month, and nothing changed.

At least it wasn't getting worse...

Our anniversary was coming up, so I skipped practice and spent the whole day with Minyoung. I did the only special thing I could, I sang. "Baby goodnight, jaljayo goodnight~" I repeated that song over and over again, hoping that maybe, it would do something.

My throat began to feel sore, so singing to drink some water. "Oppa, why'd you stop?" A soft voice whispered. "Minyoung!" I grabbed her hand. "Are you really awake?" I yelled for a nurse to come in. "Yes babo... my eyes wouldn't be open if I wasn't..." She smiled softly, "It's good to see you..." 

The doctor came and checked on Minyoung. Thank God that she was okay for now. 

Her appa cried and Yina apparently nearly hugged Jinyoung to death when she got the news.

"Hey oppa, did you know it was me?" She asked.

We were in the hospital. The doctors refused to let Minyoung go home, so we having our anniversary meal (a few days late) at the hospital cafeteria.

I shook my head. "You could have said something you know!" I yelled playfully. "You never told me you went clubbing! Or that you got yourself a stage name!" She shot back. "Yah! My company decided on that!" I laughed. After we finished our meal, I helped Minyoung back to her room. It was getting late, she needed her rest.

"Oppa can you sing me my lullaby?" She pleaded. "I don't see why not... Baby goodnight, Jaljayo goodnight..." I sang. "Then we'll be dancing in the moonlight..." Minyoung finished.

I leaned down to kiss her on the forehead. "Goodnight Minyoung... I'll be back tomorrow." I got up to leave, but stopped and turned back. "Saranghae..." Minyoung's eyes widen, "You've never said that to me...." "Yes I did! I told Min didn't I?" She laughed and wrapped her arms around my neck to pull me to her face. "I have to tell you something too." "What?" I smiled. "Oppa saranghae..." She whispered.

Months passed and Minyoung got worse, but she couldn't leave or get treatment.

Doctors gave her a month at most. We spent whatever time we had left together. There were times when I even tired to skip practice. Minyoung stopped me, said she wasn't worth risking my dream for...

The month came sooner than I wanted. Maybe the doctors were wrong and she really had more time left.

No...

If you saw her like that, you would just know...

Appa told me to say my goodbyes now. Yina was crying on Jinyoung's shoulder.

"Oppa!" She smiled cheerfully. "Hey Minyoung..." She frowned "Why are you so sad?" "You know why!" I sunk my head down onto her lap and held her hand. "You know why..."

Her fingers brushed through my hair. "Don't be like that Oppa... Think about happy things! Remember that time when we cheated on each other with each other?" I looked up, her tone was cheerful, but her eyes looked so tired... "Hey Oppa, can you sing me something?" "Of course..." I didn't get very far into the song when she stopped me. "Yah, sing something happier please?" "You really don't like sad songs huh?" I laughed sadly.

Minyoung died the next morning.

It sounds cold, but I was ready for this... Minyoung had been preparing me for this. "Focus on the good" she would always tell me....

So that's what I did.

And I took it one step farther.

After she died, I needed to find a way cheer up. I took her favorite lullaby and my old clubbing habits and put them into a song. Minyoung would have loved the chorus... It was her song, her lullaby. I left it unchanged expect for a few small words. But didn't show it to anyone. It was more for me than for everyone else. So the song was left unheard, just another file on my laptop. 

Eventually, B1A4 debuted and got our first full album. Now we were preparing for our repackaged album! "We need one more song." Our manager turned to us and asked half playfully half seriously, "Do you guys have any randoms songs on you laptop or something?" He was just kidding, but I raised my hand.

I think it was time that everyone heard my story.

Everyone approved. "This is amazing!" Some of the producers exclaimed. The guys asked, "Why haven't you shown it to us before?" The fans freaked out. "The beat is so catchy!" "The MV is so cute!"

I laughed every time I heard those comments. Only a few knew the truth. The plot in the MV was based on a true story... The song was written originally as a lullaby...

 

 It was raining. Thunder boomed and lighting streaked across the black sky, but I was busy helping a little girl sleep. "Minyoung! What are you doing still up?" I demanded. "I can't sleep! The thunder is too loud!" The little girl cried. "Have you tried drinking milk? Covering your ears? Or even calling your appa?" "Ne!" "Well what do you want me to do?" "Can you make up a lullaby?" Aish... I was just a little kid, I wasn't the best songwriter. But hearing her so afraid... "Okay... don't laugh. Baby Goodnight, Jaljayo Goodnight. Then we'll be dancing, dancing, dancing in the moonlight..." "Wow! That was so good!" She clapped. "Now go to sleep!" "Oppa! Can that be my song? Can you make it longer?" She asked. "I don't think I can make it longer! But go ahead, it's your lullaby..."

 

"Minyoung... Do you like the song I wrote?" I laid the flowers down on her grave. "You always complained that music was getting too sad, so I made this song extra happy..." I sighed.

Your lullaby...

I never intended it to be like this....

I didn't think I would ever do it....

But I finally finished it....

 

"Oppa, can you sing my lullaby?"

_________________________________________________________________________________________

YES!!!! I'm done!!!! ^O^

Seriously, the story is kinda lame right? :P

Can you guess the lullaby?

But considering that the song was about cheating, and I just wrote another story about cheating... I thought I should change it up a little.

Thanks for reading! Hope you liked it!

PS This should have been finished forever ago, but I got distracted by the Avengers (I got it on DVD!)

PPS I swear I finished this on Monday! I just edited some grammar stuff!