Soulless

Can you hear it...?  I’m sure you don’t.  Well it’s not like a I planned this yet I don’t feel anything, well, I do, I just don’t do it as much as you do, is it me? Am I broken? Or is it that you are more alive than me? I never thought of that before, but can you please tell me, Can you hear my heart beating? You don’t? Am I Dead?  

Well, I’m guessing I’m not dead since I’m talking to you right now and I’m pretty sure this is true and I’m not dreaming, or that’s what I tell myself, I would rather be somewhere else right now, don’t ask me why, I just know, I’m not meant to be here, do you believe in Destiny? Well that’s pretty much everything I believe in this world, because…  Well maybe it’s just because I feel emptiness inside me and believing that everything happens for a reason calms me down a little bit and I’m not saying I think that EVERYTHING happens for a reason, just the important thing in our life, what does destiny have to do with going to Macdonalds? I think it doesn’t.  But either way, you know? I feel a little powerless I don’t know how to explain it, just Cold. Have you heard the saying  “The Queen has been Overthrown”, well I feel like that, like I have no power in my own body, I’m searching that warmth I felt once, a long time ago, so I tell myself that I’ll be strong until I find that warmth again, maybe not tomorrow, but some day.

Yeah you heard me right, I felt a warmth long time ago, it’s like my heart was getting filled with all those feelings, they say a normally look like gray snow melting, fading away really slowly and I mean, it’s not that bad when I imagine it myself, I’ve already seen it, but… maybe that’s not the best thing for me.And don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I’m one of those Emo vampires, like the ones on Twilight or something, I’m just implying that I feel kind of Empty, but not in the way that I’m dead and drinking some random dude’s blood, you know what I’m saying?