Maybe the neighboors think we’re crazy, I guess they must’ve though that for some time now. We scream, we fight, we go to different places of the house trying not to kill ourselves.

  “Was that what we wished for?” I ask myself, already sick of this.... this war, this endless game. And I think you must feel the same way, there’s no way of escaping this feeling, is there?

          This can’t keep going on. It simply can’t, it’s crazy.

    And then I go into the room, “I have to end it”, I say to myself, “Have to tell him that it’s over”. And there you are, curling, as if you want to disappear into yourself, and this makes me love you again, and there we go.

  I hug you, I take you, and you take me. For a moment I try to fight it, but you don’t give me time, your arms around me feel just too comfortable to let go, and your mouth together with mine just feels too great and too sweet. Just this time, just this night. It’s the last night. I’ll only stay with you one more night, I promise to myself.

       After this night, everything is over.

  The next morning it’s the same like many others, there you are next to me, not curling in yourself anymore but cuddling with me and I feel powerless. Where has my resolve gone to? Am I so dumb to continue in the act that’s eating the both of us inside out? 

  And then you sigh and open your eyes, yawing, smiling and kissing me. I feel good, I feel proud, “You’re still with me. You still love me” and the I feel the guilt “Are we going to start again?” 

   And as if answering my question you wink and then curl with me a little more.

  “Well, maybe just one more night.”