˜9 leaves–

"Luhan, how long do you think it'll be until I'm better again?"

"Hopefully soon," he replied in a soft voice.

"I miss being able to do all the things that I was able to do before."

"Don't worry Sehun-a, things will be better soon," he said almost inaudibly while shuffling his feet as he sat in the old and decaying wooden chair in Sehun's room.  Suddenly the dirty carpet which hadn't been vacuumed in forever became so interesting to Luhan as he listened to Sehun's pained remarks.  It was as if every word spoken out of his mouth caused him pain.


Sehun looked out the window.


"Luhan."

"Yes?"

"I think I'm a lot like that tree."

"The one with the falling leaves?"

"Yeah.  As it loses each leaf, it looks like it gets weaker and like it hurts to be alive."

Luhan couldn't respond to his morbid comment.

"Don't you think so too?"

"You're a lot stronger than that.  And don't bring yourself down."

"Sorry," Sehun said as he fixed the blankets.

"You don't have to be sorry."
Luhan sighed and looked at his hands, which showed all the pain he had went through while staying awake at night to make sure Sehun was okay while he slept.

"I should be the one who's sorry.  I'm just worried for you."

"I understand."

The two of them shared a few minutes of silence before the younger one spoke up again.

"There's 9 leaves left."

"What?"

"There's 9 leaves left on the tree.  Maybe when all the leaves fall down, I'll be gone like the tree too-"

"Stop," Luhan snapped.

"It hurts to know that you go through pain for me too.  Once I'm gone, both of our lives would be easier.  Hey, look, one just fell down-"

"Sehun, please don't say that."

"Two more fell..."

"Oh Sehun!" Luhan yelled as he gripped onto his shoulders.  Sehun was startled and flinched from the sudden reaction.  

"You're stronger than this!  Your strength was the only thing helping me get through this too."

"I'm not strong," he mumbled.

"Yes you are, both physically and mentally.  Now get some rest.  It's really late and you must be tired."

 

Sehun simply nodded as Luhan fixed the blanket over him.  

Luhan lightly brushed his lips over Sehun's cheek and sat back on the wooden chair that he was on earlier.  

 

"Get some rest too, hyung.  Or else you'll be seeing the end of my fist," the boy jokingly threatened.  

"I told you that you were strong," Luhan chuckled.  

 

Sehun smiled at his words and looked out the window one more time before falling asleep.  

 

"There goes another one..." he whispered to himself so quietly so that only he could hear.  

---

 

˜5 leaves–

 

"Luhan."

"Mhm?"

"What do you like most about me?"

"Everything of course.  Is that even a question to ask?" he smiled.

Sehun outlined the veins along Luhan's arms with his fingers mindlessly.  Luhan had a regretful expression on his face as he blamed himself for not being able to help the boy sooner.  Sehun's fingers slowly moved down to Luhan's hands.  Their fingers intertwined with each others' as Sehun's nearly-frozen palms gave Luhan a small shock.

 

"Are you cold?"

 

Sehun shook his head as he gripped onto his hand harder.  

 

"Do you need anything?"

"Can you get me some water, please?"

 

Luhan walked out of the room into the kitchen as Sehun looked out at the tree again.  Another leaf fell with it's partner onto the ground together.  Sehun slightly frowned as Luhan walked back in with a glass of water.  

 

"Is everything alright?"

"Two more leaves fell."

"Sehun.  Stop with the damn tree, nothing is going to happen."

 

Sehun sighed as Luhan placed the glass on the bedstand beside him.   Luhan took a seat on the bed next to Sehun who was lying down.  He brushed his warm, slightly clammy hands along the grooves of Sehun's face.  He traced down along his jawline as Sehun closed his eyes.  Luhan felt a bit sad; Sehun would have normally responded back with a moan of pleasure and they would spend countless hours together.  

 

Lately, the past few hours and days weren't so enjoyable, because Luhan knew the truth.

 

He knew Sehun wasn't about to last for so long.

---

 

˜3 leaves– 

 

Sehun wouldn't stop coughing.

Yet he managed to keep that smile of his.  It pained Luhan to see him like this.  His condition worsened at the hours went  on.  The worst part was that Luhan knew that he couldn’t do anything about it.   

 

It got to the point where even he started staring at the tree as well, as if it really was tied to Sehun’s life.

 

 

The only noises Luhan ever heard lately was Sehun’s uneven breathing as he slept and the constant ticking of the clock.

 

 

It didn't help that their conversations only consisted of eye contact and physical touches.

 

 

Sehun woke from his daily nap one day to tell Luhan something.  He noticed the older boy has his eyes fixed on the tree outside.  He fixed his gaze on it as well.

 

A single leaf danced off the branches of the tree before them. As it touched the ground, it seemed to crumble into dust.  Both of their breathes hitched on their throat.

 

Sehun winced as he looked it fall.  

 

 

 

There were only two more left.

 

 

 

There was no expression on Luhan's face as he kept looking out the window.  Sehun's hand found his way to Luhan's as he lightly gripped onto it. 

 

The young boy had fear and sadness on his face as he faced away from the window.  

 

 

Luhan snapped out of his zombie-like trance and pushed back a bit of Sehun's hair.  He had a fever that warmed Luhan's hand in a matter of seconds.  He Sehun's face and softly whispered out incoherent strings of Mandarin in an effort to comfort him as he held onto Sehun's hand. 

 

 

Luhan felt a light draft seep through an open crack in the side of the window.  He turned and apruptly stood up, alarming Sehun.

 

"Is everything alright, hyung?" he managed to say through a chain of coughs. 

 

"Yes, it's fine," he said as he closed the window tightly.  

 

 

He saw another leaf get picked up by the gust and fall off the almost-barren tree.  His heart felt like it was stuck in his throat as he stood in front of the window for a while.

 

 

"Hyung what's wrong?"

 

 

"It's nothing, I just thought I saw something."

 

 

Luhan didn't want to be alive any longer. 

 

---

 

 

 

˜1 leaf–