It's been some time since we've seen each other. I'm sure the last time we talked was the day we broke up, which was 3 years ago. Three long years of not hearing his voice the minute I would wake up, no more Friday night get together's, and no more sweet 10 minute kisses.

It might seem obvious but if it wasn't already, he was the one who broke up with me. By "he" I mean SuHo. He was so kind to me. There wasn't a single moment where I didn't feel loved, but that day had me seeing a whole new side of him. He was cold and straight to the point.

-- Flashback --

I walked down the sidewalk, not caring if the cold winter air was attacking my skin. I was just happy I was going to see my boyfriend again after 3 weeks of him being busy with promotions non stop.

I saw him around the corner, standing next to the place where we first met. Chuck E Cheese's. Yeah I know it sounds super weird but we ran into each other while taking our younger siblings to the prize table. He was the one who started a conversation and I couldn't help but think he was adorable the way he nervously rubbed the back of his neck. We traded numbers and after that we just couldn't get enough of each other.

I yelled SuHo's name and waved, running towards him. He didn't wave back or smile like he usually would, he just watched me approach him silently. I knew from the way he looked at me that something was off. His eyes looked so empty.

"Hey you look sad, what's wrong?" I was hesitant to ask at first but I just couldn't help but be curious.

He scoffed and put his hands in his pockets, looking down and making no eye contact whatsoever. " We're over Jess.".

At first I didn't really understand what he meant by that so I cocked my head to the side. " Eh? Over? Over what?".

He shook his head arrogantly and looked me in the eyes, but this time they were different, anger emitted from them. " I mean we're breaking up Jessie! It's over! We're done! Do you not get it?!".

I was surprised by the use of my full name (Jessie) since that was quite formal, but what I was more surprised by was the tone of his voice and how harsh he sounded. " Your kidding right?".

" How many times do I have to say it for it to get through your head?! I am breaking up with you!" He yelled at me with bitter hatred in his tone and I stiffened as I saw people start to watch us.

Tears began to trickle down my cheeks even though I tried very hard to suppress them. " S-.....SuHo why are you doing this? Please don't do this!" This time I rose my voice, which I had never done with him.

He looked beyond pissed now. " Did you just raise your voice at me?! Stop being a baby Jessie and cut the crap!".

By now I was bawling and I didn't even know what to say anymore. I was speechless. How could he treat me that way? It was like he was some totally different person.

I could tell he got frustrated by the way I was acting and I tried to stop, but next thing I knew I felt a hard sting on my left cheek. He had slapped me. He never abused me like that before.

I looked up at him in surprise and I saw his expression twice as traumatized as mine. " Jessie I-I'm sorry....I didn't..." But he didn't finish, he simply stepped back, turned around, and ran away.

-- End of flashback --

And that was the last time I had seen him. He had left me with a broken heart and a bruised cheek. I know I'm supposed to hate him after all that, but something tells me that just wasn't him. I know it doesn't make sense, but I know that he wouldn't just act the way without a reason.

My phone began to ring and I sat up. I hadn't left the comfort of my bed for weeks just thinking about him again. I groaned and reached over grabbing my cell phone.

Without looking at the ID I hit the answer button. " Hello?".

" Hello? Is this Jessie?" That familiar voice rang through my ears and I felt my eyes widen.

I didn't answer him but he continued to talk. " Hello? Jessie? It's Baekhyun. Look I know we haven't talked ever since you and SuHo broke up but please listen to me. You need to get back with him. He needs you. He doesn't eat, he doesn't sleep, hell he barely even shows up for practice anymore. He's on the edge, Jess. He misses you. He's sick, please help him. He loves you, he still does.".

I listened quietly as tears slowly dripped down my cheeks. I didn't know what to say. I wasn't sure whether to ask where SuHo was and rush over there right away or just forget about it. I was clueless. I did the only thing that popped into my mind, I hung up.

I couldn't do it. I couldn't get over how SuHo had carelessly broken my heart. I still loved him, that I can say is true, but not the same love I had for him 3 years ago. I was finally getting over him and nothing was going to make me change my mind about him.

My phone began to ring again but this time I didn't answer. It rung a couple more times before it finally silenced. I knew he would give up. SuHo was probably fine.

I got off my bed and went into the kitchen, quietly opening the fridge and pulling out ingredients to make myself dinner. This was probably the only time of the day I'd get up now. For the record I'm not a lazy girl who skips work everyday. My manager suggested I clear my mind for a couple of months since I had seemed quite moody to him.

I put my casserole into the oven and waited patiently for it to cook in the living room, turning on the tv and watching some reality show. I looked up at the clock and realized 3 hours had gone by since Baekhyun had called me. I tried to get his words out of my head and focused on the show, when suddenly I heard my phone ring again.

I went into my room and hesitantly reached for my phone. I picked it up and looked at the ID. It was an unknown number. I answered the phone anyways.

" Hello?" My voice became shaky all of a sudden and I was out of breath, but I tried to sound as if my heart wasn't about to pop out of my chest.

"Hey!" It was Baekhyun, " I'm at a pay phone right now but do you have any idea where SuHo is? He wasn't in his bed and he wasn't at SM. Me and the guys have been searching everywhere.".

My instincts kicked in and I instantly began to get worried. That idiot probably ran into some alley and got himself hurt. " No he's not here, but don't worry I'm gonna go look right now.".

" Okay." Baekhyun's voice was breathless, he had probably ran for miles and was more worried than I was.

He hung up and I immediately sprang from my seat, changing into proper clothing, grabbing my keys, and slipping on my jacket all in a matter of minutes. Someone would've thought I had broken a world record.

I swung open the door and was about to run out to find SuHo when a strong force collapsed onto me. It was....a body? I dragged it back inside and closed my door, laying the body on the sofa afterwards. The minute I saw the face of this suitor my eyes doubled in size...it was SuHo! He looked horrible. His hair was spread out in different directions and he looked skinnier than a twig. I felt that if I touched him he would disintegrate right in front of my eyes.

I lightly shook him to see if he would wake up and I saw him stir a little. I shook him a little harder and his eyes shot open. He turned his attention towards my direction and suddenly he was wearing a goofy smile upon his face.

He hiccuped and grabbed my arm, pulling me towards him. " Ahhh~ Jess, what are you doing in my house? I missed you~".

Every word he said was slurred and I could smell the strong scent of alcohol coming from his mouth.

I winced and backed up, trying to get out of his grasp but he only pulled me closer. " Jess why are you running away from me? Why?....why..?".

His voice became more and more distant until he flew up from his seat, out of the blue. It gave me a heart attack but I didn't ask why he did so.

He looked at me with tear filled eyes and grabbed onto his shirt, trying to hold back his sobs. " Why did this have to happen Jess? Why couldn't they just let me have you?! I was so selfish, I only thought about myself!".

I had no idea what he was blabbering on about but I had a feeling it had to do with me and why we broke up.

I wanted to hear more about this, so I finally spoke. " What are you talking about SuHo-ssi?".

The use of informal language was disgusting me, I just wasn't used to using it around him, but I figure there's a new start for everything.

" What am I talking about?" SuHo's voice cracked as he spoke on, " I'm talking about how the company made me break up with you. They thought it would be best If I stay single during my debut because they didn't want any stupid scandals to pop up later in my career if we got caught. I'm sorry that I thought about myself and not you. I never wanted to break up with you Jess. Hurting you was the hardest thing I've ever had to do! Not to mention I...I hit you. I'm so sorry Jessica! Please come back to me! I LOVE YOU!".

I listened to what he had to say as tears sprung from my eyes. So he had never meant to break up with me in the first place. It was all just for his career. I knew there was something wrong when he had broken up with me that day.

SuHo hadn't stopped there though, he was still going. " I don't even like this job anymore Jess! I'm sick of pretending to be someone i'm not, especially without you by my side. This isn't worth it anymore. Please come back to me. I'll quit and we can be together again...please?".

I watched him plead for my forgiveness for another few minutes before I thought about what he said. I knew I could never be with him. I knew how much he loved to sing and be on stage and if I said yes I would just be crushing his dreams. I couldn't let him do that to himself.

" SuHo, go back home. Your being ridiculous. The guys are worried sick anyways. Just don't come back here again." I showed him to the door but he wouldn't move from his spot, he just stared at me like I was a monster.

He slowly walked towards me and shook his head in disbelief. " So that's it? Your just going to shove me away? Your not even going to consider our relationship?".

I tried to suppress the on going to tears and gave him a glare. " What relationship SuHo?! We don't have one anymore. Don't do this to yourself! This is your dream you idiot so stop chasing after me!".

I calmed myself down closed my eyes for a few brief seconds before opening them again, hoping that everything that was happening was just a dream, but he was still there.

He watched me take in a shaky breath and finally spoke once more. " You don't even get it Jessica. Yes I love to sing, but it's not worth it as an idol, not when I have to be whatever the company wants me to be. I never wanted to sell my soul. I just wanted to express my love for music to others around the world, but I realize now that it's impossible to do that. Jessica....I'm not crazy and I know what i'm missing more than my normal life back....is you. Your my dream Jessica, please come back to me.".

I didn't know what to say at this point. I was his dream? He must've been kidding, but I could see the sincerity in his eyes. Before I could even muster up the courage to answer SuHo knocked out, probably from all that alcohol and fell forward onto my chest. I swiftly caught him in my arms and bit my bottom lip. Was this the right thing to do? Was what he said true? Should I get back together with him? All these questions rang through my head. I didn't think more of anything else and lifted him onto my bed, wrapping him in the covers and making my way towards the couch with a blanket and a pillow.

-- The Next Morning --

The light hit my face the minute I opened my eyes and I cringed, flinging my wrist over them. I sat up and yawned until the events from last night popped into my head. Everything was quiet in the house and I didn't hear a single thing. I assumed he was still asleep so I walked into my room only to find the bed made. He must've left then. All those words he had said last night were probably just nonsense coming from his drunken mouth. I sighed disappointed. I felt so stupid.

I turned back around and was surprised to see SuHo standing in front of me with two cups of coffee in his hand and an awkward smile upon his face. " Uhhh..Good morning.".

I smiled very lightly and took a cup from his hand. " Good morning.".

An awkward silence filled the air and I had a strong urge to suddenly yell out 'awkward turtle!' even though that would be absurd.

SuHo coughed and began to talk, his words taking me by surprise. " I remember everything from last night. I meant what I said Jess. I want you back..and...I still love you.".

I sighed and set down the cup of coffee on the dining table and turned back to him. " SuHo, it's not going to work out. No matter how hard you try to avoid it, you will always be an idol. Me being with you would only further ruin your image and your dream. Face it SuHo, it was never meant to be.".

" That's it!!" He strutted towards me confidently and pointed his finger at me accusingly, " You don't trust me? You don't believe me? You don't want there to ever be an 'us' again that's all is it? You hate me!".

I gasped and immediately felt sorry for making him feel that way. " SuHo how could you say that? I don't hate you!".

" Well it sure seems that way Jess." He took in a deep breath, " Maybe my manager was right. Maybe it was time I moved on too.".

He was about to walk out of the house when a loud voice popped into my head. Are you stupid?! You love him you and he loves you! Grab him before it's too late you idiot!

" WAIT!" I yelled and grabbed onto SuHo's arm, stopping him in his tracks.

Tears spilled down my cheeks as I held onto him tightly. " Please don't go.....i'm sorry...I- I love you too SuHo oppa.".

At the sound of 'oppa' I saw his ears turn red and a small smile krept onto his face. He grabbed onto my waist and  lifted me up into the air, spinning me around.

" Finally." He smiled brightly and put me down leaning in and kissing me passionately.

We both sighed in content while SuHo leaned his forhead against mine. " I missed those soft lips.".

I smirked and looked up at him with a small pout. " Ohhh so that's what you missed eh? The soft lips?".

He chuckled and tucked a strand of loose hair behind my ear. " I definitely missed YOU the most. I love you.".

I smiled at his cheesiness and kissed him one more time. " I love you too.".

SuHo rested his chin on my shoulder and whispered into my ear. " But I still couldn't live without those soft lips.".

 

 

yay i finally put it up after telling myself i wouldn't i did anyways! but i feel bad about my other stories :(

oh and by the the way for some of you who don't know what Chuck E' Cheese's is it was my childhood past time. Like it's literally an arcade for little kids with pizza and a salad bar, a giant mouse named Chuck E' you can hug, and a whole bunch of tickets and prizes. I used to go there all the time with my parents when I was little ^^ comment if you remember Chuck E' Cheese's as a kid :3

 

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