Do you know that feeling––that feeling of selfishly wanting someone til you were about to lose your sanity? 

 

Well, if you don't, then I'll tell you––it's too HARD that you would wish you never existed.

 

Loving him, for me, was the best feeling in the world. Back then I thought when you learn to love someone, it would be all happiness and joy. Back then I thought loving was pure bliss. Back then I thought negativity would never exist. 

 

"Hurt? What is hurting? 'Never heard of it!"––was always my response whenever my friends were trying to warn me about loving this special person.

 

BUT I WAS SO WRONG.

 

Right now if you're going to ask me what the meaning of love for me is, I'll answer it as quick as Flash with––"Love? It is pain..." then I'll tightly grip on my hand to prevent myself from crying.

 

Oh, well...

 

Haven't you heard yet? Just last week, I finally confessed to him.

 

You read that right! I confessed! 

 

With who? With Chanyeol, of course. The most special person in my heart and life... The person who had been with me through my ups and downs.

 

But sadly... He turned me down.

 

As he turned me down, I felt my whole world crash down along with my heart. 

 

Ironic how we'd been friends for good 7 years but it was just then that I finally realized my true feelings... And it was already too late.

 

Six months too late...

 

 

 

>\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\<

 

 

 

"Kris!!! Kris hyung!" An excited, deep voice called as I felt a pair of hands covering my eyes. "Guess who....!!!!!"

 

I smirked. Did I really need to guess? It's not as if I couldn't recognize his voice, right? But then, I pretended I didn't know. Just for fun.

 

"Uhm... Who's this? Sehun-ah?" I said.

 

I heard Chanyeol stomped his feet. "Aish, hyung! I hate you!" then I finally saw brightness after he uncovered my eyes.

 

I grinned at him. "Oh, Chanyeol-ah! Sorry! Your voice is just kinda different today... So, what's up?"

 

Chanyeol excitedly looked at me. "Hyung! I have something to tell you! I––"

 

I cut his words by putting my thumb on his lips. Me, too, had something to say. And I couldn't wait any longer!

 

"Me first!" I stared at his bulging eyes before my thumb let go of his lips and took a deep breath. "Chanyeol... I–I love you!"

 

I was expecting a jumping Chanyeol, but what I've seen was a puzzled and angry Chanyeol...

 

What's wrong? Did he not like it?

 

"Hey? I said I love you..." I repeated.

 

Silence.

 

Silence.

 

Then Chanyeol walked near me and hugged me tight. I thought he'd tell me we felt the same, so I hugged him back. But I guess I was wrong. I felt his body trembling. Then I heard.... sobs?

 

"Channie! Why are you c-crying?" I managed to ask.

 

"Hyung..." 

 

"Yeah?"

 

"I'm sorry..."

 

My brows furrowed. "Why?"

 

"That's what I was about to tell you... I... I already have Kai... You're six months too late!!!" he furiously said.

 

My hands which were wrapped around his body fell down. My body, if not supported by his, would have probably fell down as well.

 

"W-what... How..."

 

"Hyung, six months ago we started dating..." 

 

"Oh. Congratulations." was all what I responded. Then I gave him a weak smile, then started to walk away.

 

He's a smart guy, he probably already knew I wanted to be alone. And thankfully, he really knew. He didn't dare to catch up with me, and I was so fine with it. If he did, I'll probably just break down in front of him.

 

Six months too late...

 

 

 

>//////////////////////////////<

 

 

 

So, yeah... 

 

I'll miss this place, I'll miss the foods, I'll miss the scent of fresh, morning air...

 

"Flight 501 to China..........."

 

Oh, it's time. I needed to go.

 

I'll leave this memorable country, where the happiest and saddest memories of mine happened.

 

In China, my home, is probably where I could find the one who'd pick up the broken pieces of my heart.

 

But until I couldn't still find that person, I vowed to myself my heart would remain with him––with Chanyeol––the guy that I love...

 

 Six months too late...

 

 

---

 

 

 

 

Goshhhh it's KrisYeol, my number one OTP, yet I separated them >\\\<

Ihatemyself ;AAAAA;