On the last day of 2011, I looked up at the sunny sky and swore I would never fall in love again this year and work extremely hard on promoting in Japan. I heard my phone suddenly vibrating and as I walked back into my apartment I thought of the times he would text me and say how much he missed me. I sighed heavily and ran to the impatiently vibrating phone. I looked at the callers name.

-Hoya-

I looked puzzled at the phone, then I quickly picked up and heard him scream.

"COME PARTY WITH US! CALL A KARA MEMBER TO COME! I'll text you the address. It'll be the best new years eve party!"

i chuckled and hung up. I looked back at the balcony and shrugged. I quickly ran to my bedroom and picked out the first thing there. I wore it and left my hair as it was. I picked up everything I needed and ran for the door. I called gyuri unni to come. Surprisingly she agreed even though it was short notice.

The sun was setting and people were gathering around the park to see the fireworks. As I saw a few boys and a girl talking loudly at a picnic table, I sighed heavily and looked at gyuri who looked nervous. I chuckled slightly but she gave me a death glare in return.

Hoya saw us approaching and screamed "NICOLEEEEE! Over here!"

I held my head down from embarrassment and dragged gyuri behind me. We arrived at the table shyly and bowed. "hi, sorry we are late." 

"no it is alright sunbaenim! The fun was just starting!" squealed Hoya. "sorry for not introducing you guys earlier. This is sunggyu our teams leader."

hoya pointed to a guy that sat at the end of the table smiling at us with his eye smile. "annyonghaseyo! Nicole and gyuri sunbaenim" he stood up and gave us a 90 degree bow. I saw gyuri checking him out so I nudged her.

Suddenly a girls voice screamed next to him. "Ya! You didn't do that when you were greeting me!" yelled hara.

"hara! You said you were out with friends!" exclaimed gyuri.

"haha. I am unni :)" she chuckled.

"back to introducing people..." angry Hoya said because he got interrupted "this is myungsoo, the guy that is sitin next to hara."

"yo." he bluntly replied. 

I gave him a small smile and ignored it.

"Ahhh.. We have 9 hours to waste. What shall we do?" hoya said.

"eat!" I screamed.

No one replied.

I dropped my head down in embarrassment.

Hara held her stomach and laughed.

The night was approaching and it was getting colder and colder. I looked up at the stars thinking about what I have been doing for the past year. Until I heard someone sit next to and said..

"are you cold?" 

I looked up to see a tall dark figure. Myungsoo.

"getting cold... Are you?" I awkwardly said.

"not really. Was having a dance battle with Hoya. Not a good idea." he smiled.

I blushed as I saw him smiling. I looked down and chuckled.

I dont remember how long we spent there talking about ourselves and our lives. Though there was some awkward times during those few hours but I'll never forget the first thing he said to me in that deep voice of his.

"myungsoo!" yelled hara. "I have been looking everywhere for you!" 

" argh! Mian". He stood up and looked down at me. "I'll talk to you later." and smiled and walked off with hara. I saw her hold his hand and whined about how cold she was. 

I felt my heart break. 

I returned to the group and waited for the fireworks to go off. While everyone was waiting and counting down, I looked over at him and smiled. I watched his facial expression as the fireworks went off, his smile... I smiled and looked up at the sky finding beautiful different coloured fireworks. The night ended like that. 

As I returned to the picnic table to get my phone and leave with gyuri. I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around and he smiled at me. 

"give me your phone Nicole." 

"Whyy...?"

"just give me it" he smiled.

I gave it to him giving him a suspicious look. He quickly typed something in my phone and said.

"call me when you feel tired or sad. Okay?" he smiled again before hara pulled him away and bid us goodbye

I looked down at my phone and saw the called ID he set himself as.

-Myungsoonie-

I laughed at the name and placed the phone near my heart. As my heart beat vigorously.

The next morning, I heard my message ringtone go off. 

Nicole,

Hi it is Myungsoonie :L did you sleep well?

Myungsoonie

I smiled and quickly replied back.

It has been 7 months since I met him. We texted everyday, he became the person I relied on the most, his shoulder became my crying pillow, his voice became my lullaby, his smile became my cure and him himself became my heart.

I loved... Myungsoo.

I never told him because I was afraid of getting hurt again. I kept quiet and let things be as they were. 

Until that one day, that one day where it took all those things away from me. My cure, my happiness and most of all my heart. I walked through the park that was once crowded on new years eve. And then I stumbled upon Myunsoo... And hara.

I saw him holding hands with hara sitting at that place where we watched the stars, where we first met and where I fell in love with him. He smiled happily as he looked at hara. The same smile that always made me happy. I smiled and walked away in tears, knowing that he was happy with her, I had to be happy for him. I had to be. As I walked further and further away I realized how ignorant I was. I ignored all the times he smiled to her like that.

Im sorry but I loved you, myungsoo.

But I knew I had to let go to start another new year in 5 months time.