It was nearing the end of spring, winter’s about to come and the streets of Japan was bustling with people and cars. I was sitting at a café, near a park, sipping my Peppermint Mocha while reading the morning paper. It was already 4pm and the street is starting to fill up with people of different ages. Yeah, I know. You’re wondering why I’m reading the morning paper at 4 in the afternoon, right? Well, I was just too busy to read it this morning so I’m reading it now.

The café where I’m staying had a good view of the park. A tall Sakura tree was placed at the center, making it the center of attention. The café is small. Only a hand-full of people can stay inside. Today, there were only 5 of us in here: an old man who came by everyday just to have his fill of good espresso; a couple who came by every now and then to just spend time together; a woman in her mid thirties who opt to work in the café than her own place; and me, Jang Wooyoung, a professional photographer.

I walk in here almost every day just to look at the Sakura tree at the middle of the park or the different people that pass by or just relax and have a cup of my favorite Peppermint Mocha. Every single day it’s the same, I walk in here, I order my coffee, I sit near the window and I would just look around. I feel calm whenever I smell the scent of newly roasted coffee beans that surround the whole café. I was so into reading the paper when I heard the door chimes move. And there she was, the most beautiful woman I have ever seen ever since I was transferred here in Japan.

Her brown eyes and pink-tinted cheeks; the way here hair falls in front of her face; and her captivating smile put me under a spell. She walked towards the counter and I can’t help but eavesdrop on her order.

“One Peppermint Mocha, please.” She said with her soft voice.

After the barista took her order, I stood right behind her and told the barista, “I’ll have what she’s having.” She looked at me and smiled. I smiled back. This was the first move I’ll make to get to know her better. She then leaned forward and asked me, “Are you sure about that?”

“yes, I am.” I started. “why?” smiling shyly when she did that gesture.

“It looks like you had Peppermint Mocha a couple of minutes ago.” She said while smiling at me. “you know, too much coffee is bad for you.” she smiled and stepped out of the line.

“I know, but it’s just my second cup. So it won’t hurt, right?” I asked her smiling brightly. “uhm, would you like to sit with me?” I hesitated and asked her.

“sure.” She said looking at me. “It gets lonely when you’re alone anyway. Right Wooyoung?” She smiled taking her cup of coffee. I thought, “how did she know my name?” then I saw my identification card I was still wearing and I just smiled and led her to where I was sitting. It was nice, having company like this. I just looked at her and I find myself smiling like a fool.

“Anything wrong?” she asked. “Is there something on my face?” she panicked, taking a kleenex and wiped her face.

“ah, no. nothing.” I said. “don’t mind me.” I smiled at her and tried to hid my flushed face.

“oh, okay.” She flashed that beautiful smile again. I saw her took out a piece of paper and she asked me if she could borrow a pen. I gave her my pen and she started writing down that paper while smiling. I didn’t mind her. But then she looked up to me and said, “do you wanna go for a walk?”

I didn’t hesitate. I wanted to know her better and this is one way I’ll succeed. We passed by an antique shop and she saw an old banjo. She asked me to play it. I told her I don’t know how, but she insisted. So I got the banjo and just strummed and strummed. She was laughing and dancing and everything just felt nice. I stopped playing when I saw her catch her breath.

“looks like you danced too much.” I said jokingly. She just smiled and looked at me.

“hey, I always wanted to go to India.” She said. “but it’s too far away.” I saw the sadness in her eyes and I can’t help but fulfill her request. It may not be the actual India but I know an Indian restaurant just around the block. I took her hand and told her to follow me. I led her to the restaurant and asked for a seat for 2. The concierge was good enough to find us a spot near the center of the place. The interior was painted gold. Statues of Indian gods and goddesses adorn the place. Painting on wall, the architecture, and the music brings you to India just by sitting there. She looked at me and smiled.

“this is the closest we can get.” I told her. “is this okay with you?” I smiled while looking at her. I can see the happiness in her eyes. she didn’t say anything but I knew that this was close enough. We ordered some curry and some beef wraps and ate happily. We talked about life, fashion, music, and arts. It was a nice dinner. Not my usual eat-ramen-at-home ones. This felt nice.

After eating, I paid the bill and we walked out into the street again. She saw some street musicians playing and she started dancing again. She pulled me in and told me to dance. I just moved around not minding anyone. It seemed like it was only me and her who existed in the world. When the music stopped, we also stopped and I saw her catch her breath again. I smiled at her, she smiled at me.

“hey,” she said. “have you tried those candied bugs?” she asked me. “I heard there’s a store somewhere that sells it. should we try it? my treat.” She asked smiling. “it’s my first time too, so don’t worry. We’ll do it together, okay?” she flashed that smile again and who am I to say no. Before I was even able to answer, she pulled me to that store and she bought 2 pieces of candied grasshopper.

“Are you sure about this?” I asked. It looks disgusting. You can see the grasshopper inside the sugar candy. I saw her look at me and smiled. That moment, I realized that she didn’t even have to speak for me to understand what she wanted to say. In three counts, we took a bite and looked at each other. it was really disgusting. We spit the candies into a trash bin and laughed while walking.

“hey,” I heard her say again. “why are you so ugly when you smile?” she asked. Smiling and laughing. I was dumbfounded by what she said. But I knew she never meant it because of the way she laughed.

It was already quarter to 12mn and I’m still with her frolicking around town. We walked towards the park and she saw the Sakura tree. We walked towards it and just sat on the grass beneath the tree. She took out that piece of paper again and scribbled on it while smiling. I wanted to know what she was writing there. I wanted to know what makes her so happy when she’s writing on that piece of paper. But I just didn’t mind it.

The moon was full and it’s illuminating the pink and white Cherry blossoms on the tree. It was a marvelous sight to see. She sat beside me and leaned her head against my shoulder. The silence was comfortable. Her warmth made the cold breeze seem to not exist. I have fallen completely in love with her. Then she stood up and started walking. I was about to turn around but she stopped me.

“Don’t look back.” She said. “Please, don’t look or it’ll be harder for me to go away.” She continued. I heard her voice quiver a little. “Is she crying?” I asked myself. I heard her footsteps getting softer and softer until I heard no more. I never even got to know her name. 

I was sitting alone under that Sakura tree and a blossom fell beside me. I picked it up and saw my pen with the paper she was scribbling on beside it. I picked it up and saw how crumpled it was. Stains of coffee and other things were on that piece of paper. I turned it around and saw that it was a list. Everything was checked and there were some comments.

The list was full of things to do
- Bungee jump - check 
- Climb the Eiffel tower - check 
- Read 20 books – check | I will never do this again. 
- Throw a big party - check 

And a lot more. I smiled at all the little comments and doodle she added for some things on the list. I was about to finish when I saw the only blue ink on that paper. It was my pen. I started reading what she checked using my pen.

- Talk to a complete stranger – check
- Sit with him/her and just talk – check
- Make someone play the banjo and dance to it – check | even though he barely knows how.
- Pull someone and dance together to street music – check | his smile is captivating
- Go to India and eat Indian food – close enough 
- Get a cute guy to pay for my dinner – double check!
- Try candied bugs with someone you just met – check | it was diiiiisguuustttiiiinng!!!
- Tell someone cute that he/she is ugly – SCORE! | 100/100 points
- Look at the Sakura tree, under a full moon, with someone I can possibly marry. – Thank You!

I smiled with tears starting to fall down my eyes and started to wonder. I looked up the paper and read, “A Cancer Patient’s 100 Things to Do Before I Die: Kim Bekah’s Bucketlist” There was one last task in her list that wasn’t checked: “Die happily.” Beside it I saw her write “Wooyoung, please check this for me. Thank You.”

Kim Bekah. That was her name. My heart started beating faster; I knew it was about her. From that day, I never saw her again. I may sound crazy but in my heart, I know we had married each other that night. So every time I think of her or miss her, I just go to that Sakura tree in the middle of the park and just sit there. I know she’s somewhere here. Maybe a leaf, or a cherry blossom. I don’t mind. As long as I know she’s looking down and smiling that bright smile.

“I miss you.” I whispered and the wind blew. A cherry blossom fell on my lap and I knew she heard me. She was the first woman I truly loved, and I think I’ll never find someone else.