can't believe its over
I watched the whole thing fall 
and I never saw the writing that was on the wall

Hangeng takes the last of his luggage and drags it out of his room. No - its no longer explicitly his. today, after his departure, he'll be leaving behind one lonely band member, one lonely person who'd gotten used to having a roommate but would now be left alone. Hangeng looks apologetically at Heechul, his ex-roommate, but heechul's got his face turned away from him, probably to hide his tears.

"Chul-ah." he tries once again, soft voice and accented Korean, and Heechul turns around. "I'm sorry." he slips over the simple phrase and curses, but guesses it's for the best. if he can't even say "sorry" fluently in Korean, why is he still here?

Heechul laughs. "your Korean is still as atrocious as ever," he chuckles, trying to find some semblance of happiness and humor in this sad, sad situation, even as tears fall from his red-tinged eyes and down his pale cheeks. Hangeng sighs.

"you know I don't want to go," he says, striding across the room and enveloping Heechul in a hug. he'll miss this eccentric Korean guy who always about his atrocious pronunciation. this crazy Korean guy who proclaimed himself to be Hangeng's personal translator. this weirdo, Hangeng thinks to himself with a fond smile.

this wonderful Korean guy who stood up for him when he was bullied and mistreated. who he fell in love with.

with that thought, his arms tighten even more around Heechul.

"Chul-ah, you know I... don't want to... leave. I'm just... not... happy... I'm very sad here," as he gets more upset and distraught, his Korean becomes even worse, making Heechul laugh even more through his ever-increasing tears.

If I'd only knew
The days were slipping past
That the good things never last
That you were crying

as Heechul cries, he realises that Hangeng is right - he's not happy here. no matter how simple the words Hangeng just said, the meaning is there, looming behind the childish sentence.

how many times has he heard Hangeng's cries in their shared room? how many times has he rolled over in the middle of the night to find the pillow wet? how many times has he woken up to Hangeng's red, puffy eyes? how many times has he predicted this, anticipated the bitter yet inevitable goodbye?

Heechul shakes his head. today is Hangeng's day. he won't ruin it for him by crying. today is the day Hangeng shows the world that SM isn't that great, he reminds himself. with that, he pushes himself up and stands.

"c'mon, geng. you have to say goodbye to all the others," Heechul whispers, but not before enjoying a few more moments in Hangeng's embrace.

after all, who knows how long it'll be before he can experience it again?

Summer turned to winter
And the snow it turned to rain
And the rain turned into tears upon your face
I hardly recognized the girl you are today
And, God, I hope it's not too late
Hmmm... It's not too late

outside, in the living room, almost everyone's crying. donghae, Kyuhyun, Ryeowook, zhoumi, leeteuk, eunhyuk. no, Hangeng thinks. Jungsu and hyukjae. leeteuk and eunhyuk are simply names that SM has given them, just like Hankyung. he remembers, but shrugs off the offending name easily. i am Hangeng. 韩庚。 I won't ever forget again.

but suddenly, Sungmin, one of the few who aren't shedding tears, comes up to Hangeng and hugs him hard, saying quietly, "hyung, be happy, okay? I.... I've noticed you haven't exactly been all that happy when you've been with us, and I guess that's management's fault, and none of yours. I mean, it's been a long time coming now, and... I've always noticed you looking sad over the past year or so." Sungmin smiles. "all the best back in china, hyung. kyu taught me how to say good luck in Chinese, so here it is. *我祝你幸福。I wish you luck."

across the room, zhoumi laughs at Sungmin's Chinese. "Ge, remember, I'll always be here for you," he says, looking at Hangeng from across the room, and Hangeng nods and smiles a bittersweet smile, thinking that for once, zhoumi looks small, shrunken from sadness and defeat. from behind him, Heechul laughs, tells him, "see, geng. they're all crying cos of you. bad boy." but Hangeng smiles, knowing its said in jest. well, half in jest, but there's no real intention to hurt.

'Cause you are not alone
I'm always there with you
And we'll get lost together
'Til the light comes pouring through

slowly, after Sungmin and zhoumi have said their parts, everyone rises and approaches Hangeng. Jungsu reaches him first, though.

"Hangeng-ah, I'll miss you real badly. even though Kangin says that I'll have one less dongsaeng to look after, it's still one less brother to me. you were... really a fantastic bandmate no matter what SM says." Jungsu finishes, sobbing now.

"hyung, donghae and I, we'll work even harder as the Dancers of the group now, to fill the spot you've left us," hyukjae and donghae come up and tell him so together, their boyish faces reflecting tears instead of the cheery smiles Hangeng normally sees.

"Hangeng-hyung, you were a really good leader of super junior m," Ryeowook manages before a fresh round of tears overwhelm him and Yesung hugs him and waits for him to compose himself.

"hyung, I... I know I don't normally say it, but I love you. saranghae." Kyuhyun mutters, looking at the floor, the ceiling, Sungmin, anywhere but him.

one by one, the members give him encouraging messages, wishes of hope, dreams. miracles, belief, trust, support. and finally, Heechul takes his turn.

he flies into Hangeng's arms right in the middle of all of them, hugging him close and tight. "geng, you were about the only person who made me really really really happy, do you know that? I always felt complete with you. I wish you all the best in china, but I bet you'll be doing real well back there, since to begin with you don't even need an awesome translator like me, which is your loss by the way. I want you to get out there and show SM their loss, their loss by being such a . I want you to be the best you can be. but most of all, I want you never to forget me." he finishes, eyes downcast and the rest of superjunior thinks: is this their normal egoistic inflated Heechul?

but Hangeng wraps him in his arms again. "I won't, Chul. you know that. I can't forget you. I will remember you for always. saranghae, I love you, *我爱你," he finishes.

Jungsu, however, butts in. "geng-ah, you better get going before you miss your plane," but his eyes tell Hangeng that he doesn't ever want Heechul to be separated from Hangeng. that if he had the choice, Hangeng would be staying with super junior, Hangeng would be happy in super junior, and it'd stay that way forever.

Hangeng turns around and walks out of the door - walks out of the super junior dorm for the last time, bearing the members (and most importantly, Heechul's) hopes on his shoulders.

'Cause when you feel like you're done
And the darkness has won
Babe, you're not lost
When the world's crashing down
And you can not bear the cross
I said, baby, you're not lost

*我祝你幸福:- I wish you luck 
*我爱你:- I love you