”Okey let’s shoot the last scene now where you guys are standing by the car and Yonghwa is about to give you water but instead throws it at you and you start chasing him and you have a little water fight, okey?” the director says and both Yonghwa and Juniel nods and gets to their positions

I had spent the whole day of the video shoot to the song “Fool” that was a duet with the new girl Juniel and my BOYFRIEND Yonghwa from CN BLUE. Yes my boyfriend was singing a love duet with another girl. It was really hard for me sitting there watching them acting all lovey dovey to each other. The scene I hated the most so far was when they were sitting in the caravan singing and playing. The looks she gave him but most important, the looks he gave her. His eyes were filled with love, either it was real or Yonghwa was a really, really good actor. And now this scene, they seemed to have a genuinely good time with each other just fooling around. And I hated what I saw. Yonghwa was MY boyfriend and no one else’s and here he was doing this song with her. Everybody knew that Yonghwa and I were together, we had recently revealed it, did he ever think about how this little duet would come off as in the eyes of everybody? They would think that he didn’t love me as he did such a sweet song with someone else. And what made me even angrier was that I knew that he had written the song himself.

As they ended the scene Yonghwa hugged Juniel and smiled and she smiled back looking like a love struck fool. Then I had enough so I walked away to my car, I wasn’t going to sit there and see my boyfriend flirt with another girl. It was enough that I had to suffer throughout the whole shooting of the music video but I wasn’t gonna watch them as they had finished and didn’t need to act like that anymore. So I drove home without telling Yonghwa.

Well home I started to cry as I was thinking about the video shoot. They didn’t seem to be acting, not at all. They honestly seemed to be in love with each other. I couldn’t believe that after one and a half years together he would do such thing towards me. I loved him like crazy, he was the only one for me and I wouldn’t even dream to do anything like that towards him. Thinking that I went to my wardrobe and started packing my suitcases. I needed to get out of there. I couldn’t handle facing Yonghwa after that music video. Then I spotted the couple ring that Yonghwa had given me over a year ago, I hadn’t once taken it off, but sometime had to be the first right? So I took it off and laid it on his pillow. I looked at it; it was the most precious thing that I owned. It was in silver “Yonghwa” was engraved on it and on the inside the date we got together was engraved, the 9^th of January – 2011. That was the happiest night of my life; it was the start of something special, something special that that Juniel girl had destroyed.  Yonghwa was wearing a similar ring only that my name was engraved on it, wonder if he still wore it.

While I was standing there, packing, crying and thinking I heard how the front door opened. I froze. I had been too slowly, Yonghwa had arrived. Damn, now it would be harder for me to leave.

“Jagiya!?” I heard him call out, I didn’t answer, I couldn’t answer, how dared he call me jagiya after that video shoot? Then the door to our bedroom opened and in comes Yonghwa. “Jagiya, are you in here?” he questions but I kept quiet. But then the door to the wardrobe opens, but I don’t turn around to face him and I try to mute my crying. “Jagiya, what are you doing?” he asks worried and in the next second I feel his arms around me and he buries his face in my neck. That little loving gesture made me lose it so I let out a big sob causing Yonghwa to stiffen “Jagiya are you crying?” he asks and then he let go of me and places himself in front of me, but I quickly look down not wanting to look at him. But Yonghwa wasn’t gonna let that stop him so he put two fingers under my chin and lifts up my face. Forced to look at him I see that his eyes are filled with worry, it made me feel a bit sick thinking about the looks he’s given Juniel earlier. “What’s wrong?” Yonghwa then asks softly and pulls me in to an embrace with me trying to fight it. “Please talk to me, you’re driving me crazy!” he then says frustrated “I’m not a mind reader you know, just please tell me what’s wrong” he says but I refused to talk, he stayed silent for a while and just let his right hand drift over my left arm. “Why have you been packing? Where are you going? Have something happened? Damn it; just tell me what’s up!” Yonghwa then exclaimed and I started to feel a bit bad over the fact that I ignored him, he deserved better than that.

“I’m going to my parents” I whispered and Yonghwa looked down at me wonderingly

“Have something happened to them or anyone else in the family?” he asked worried

“No, they’re all fine” I assured him

“Then what is it?” he wondered and my cheek but when he did that I grabbed his hand to take it away but then he froze “Why aren’t you wearing your couple ring?” he asked me seriously

“I took it off” I replied simply and he looked at me confused

“You’ve taken it off?” he asked surprised and I nodded “Well it was going to get replaced anyways but why?” he continued and I wondered what he meant with that it was going to get replaced

“I don’t know if we should be together anymore” I whispered but he heard me

“What!? Jagiya why!?” He almost yelled

“I think you have feelings for someone else” I said and he looked at me like I was crazy

“Someone else? What are you talking about?”

“Where you not present today at the video shoot? I was, and I saw the way you looked at Juniel your eyes were filled with love and I saw how you seemed to have a blast with her. And seriously you wrote the lyrics to the song and sang it with her. You sang a really sweet love duet with her, a girl that is not your girlfriend and you seemed to really enjoy it and meaning what you sang” I told him and now the tears were flooding down my cheeks

“You seriously think that?” he asked me and I nodded “You babo, my sweet little babo, do you know why I looked that lovingly at her? Cuz I imagined her being you, if I hadn’t done that it never would’ve worked and the video had been awful, jagiya the whole time I imagined her being you. That was the only way my performance was going to be believable.” He said and I looked up at him wonderingly

“Really?”

“Yes, really. Jagiya do you know who I wrote that song for?” he asked and I shook my head and he chuckled “You’re so ignorant, I wrote it for you, every single line in that song I wrote thinking about you and no one else. Every single word is for you. And you know why I had to sing it with Juniel? Cuz jagiya that wasn’t my choice or intention. I was sitting in the studio one day and had just finished the song and was singing and playing it for myself when our producer came in and listened to the song and then he told me that I should sing it with Juniel and I didn’t have any say in it. So that’s why I had to do it, I didn’t want to sing it with her. This song was going to be a present to you but I didn’t even have time to sing it to you before we had to record it, it all went so fast. This song was going to be me telling you how much I absolutely love you. Cuz I do, more than anyone and anything else in the entire world. Don’t you ever doubt that cuz jagiya” Yonghwa said and then he paused and went out of the wardrobe leaving me confused, but he was soon back with the guitar in his hand, and he placed himself in front of me and started to sing.

“Nan babo nan neoman boneun babo neol sarang-hae nuga mwora-go nollindaedo neoman boneun babo-ga twehl-ke babo nan neoman boneun babo nae soneul jabajwo nareuranajwo neoman sarang-haneun babo”when he sang he looked at me all the time with I can say more love in his eyes than what he had at the video shoot. “I’m a fool, I’m a fool who only sees you, I love you, no matter what anyone says or teases, I will be a fool who only sees you, I’m a fool, I’m a fool who only sees you, hold my hand, hug me I’m a fool who only loves you” he continued just saying the English translation of what he had just sung even though he knew that understood the Korean, I had been living in Korea for about five years after all “They want me to do an English version of the song and I said that I would do it on one condition, if you sang it with me, and they agreed” he then told me and I looked at him in shock

“Are you serious Yonghwa?” I asked him and he nodded

 “Yes, don’t want to sing it with anyone else” he said and then he rose and placed a kiss on my lips before he picked down a box from the highest shelf and then he reached out his hand for me to grab it and I took it and let him lead me out to the bedroom, he placed me on the bed and then he spotted the couple ring and chuckled. He grabbed it and went to my jewellery box and took one of my silver chains and put the ring on it and after that he went up to me and put it around my neck “Now that’s more like it” he said and smiled and I looked at him wonderingly

“What are you doing Yonghwa?” I asked and he smirked and went to the box that he had taken from the wardrobe and opened it and took something from it but I couldn’t see what it was as he was having his back to me. But he quickly returned and placed himself next to me and took my hands in his and looked me in the eyes.

“Jagiya I really do love you, that day when we met for the first time, I didn’t wake up thinking: today I’m gonna meet the love of my life, the girl I’m gonna marry someday. But I went to bed thinking that I had. You make me complete, you make me feel like the most loved guy in the entire world. I would do anything for you, anything. All the words, actions, songs, they will never be enough to tell you how much I love you, but they’re a start. What I’m trying to say here is that I love you like crazy and will never stop doing that, I want to spend the rest of my life loving you, so I was wondering if are you busy the rest of your life? Or would you consider spending it with me?” he said and I was crying and crying but then I saw how Yonghwa went down on one knee and pulled out a little box out of his pocket, he opened it an in it there was a silver ring with a big pink diamond. I gasped and just stared at him, my tears even stopped.  “Liandra, will you marry me?” Yonghwa then asked and then my tears started rolling down my cheeks again

“Yes, yes! Dammit Yonghwa of course I will!” I exclaimed and Yonghwa started chuckling at me, but then he took the ring out of its box and held it up in front of me

“May I?” he asked and I nodded smiling like a fool and then he grabbed my left hand and put the ring on my finger “So now you’re mine!” Yonghwa exclaimed and laughed and then he pulled me down to him so that both of us fell down on the floor and then he wrapped his arms around me and kissed me softly

“I love you so much Yonghwa” I told him and he smiled

“I love you too and that ring on your finger is there to remind you whenever I’m not around or have to do a similar thing to what I did today. God forbid if I have to though. But you get the pictures” he said and I chuckled

“Yes, I do”

“Now come here babo and kiss me once more” Yonghwa said and once again we were kissing and I honestly couldn’t be any happier. Yonghwa was really mine now and no one else’s! 

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