A/N: OMG how long has it been since I last updated this story for you all?! You all must hate me so much for leaving it on a thread. Well read on and you're gonna hate me more. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Thank you so much to all my loyal readers, you all are amazing.

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW.

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               Slowly she brought her right hand upwards to her head, with her slender fingers, Kwon Yuri began to massage her temples which was aching even before her very much anticipated train ride. She dragged her fingers down the bridge of her nose and continued to pay equal attention, massaging them softly. With her free hand she rummaged the insides of her denim satchel for a painkiller, only to be faced with disappoinment as she remembered she had left it behind carelessly. Frustrated, she sighed heavily upwards causing her fringe to jump excitedly. As she ran her fingers along the window sill, she gazed at the outside world blankly, passing her by and completely ignorant of her emotional turmoil.

                Kwon Yuri was on her way back to her hometown of Goyang, north of Seoul. It barely takes an hour to reach her parents but she had always felt like it was the ride of her life every time. She developed a habit of replaying events in her head every single time she got on that train finding her way home. This time, it was no exception. Her tired mind kept on replaying that particular night with the ever so captivating Kim Jong In, the night when they had been reunited as lovers again but a part of her felt like it was so surreal. Anytime now she was going to fall off her seat and she would be back in Seoul, not riding on a train on her way home.

                Cursing under her breath, she wished that she had not made such a meaningful promise to Kai that night. She wished that her conscience could have at least known better and let her bite her tongue down hard – anything to make her stop right there before she was even exchanging those sweet words with him. She wished Kai had been mean and reluctant instead of so warm and accepting.

”I promise you that I will be there for you and that we will not get separated again no matter what. I promise you that now. Give me one week to sort something out and then I'll come running back to you - I'll be yours Kai-ssi. Mind, body and soul.”

                She remembered every word she had spoken and she hated it. She started to pull on her loose locks, a bad habit she took up whenever her mind got in a jam. She hated how easily he made her fall every time they meet up close, she hated how that scent of his does incredible wonders to her and she just felt like it was unfair – as if she was the only one suffering from all this tension and she cursed yet again. What did you do to me Jongin?

                Yuri was brought back down to Earth when an announcement filled the air, informing all the passengers that they had arrived in Goyang, Gyeonggi – Seoul. As she lifted herself up to stand steadily, she hooked her satchel through her arms and let it sit comfortably on her right shoulder while her free hand held onto her ticket and phone. She got out of the compartment and sighed yet again, balancing her clouded mind. Even if she hated all the things that she had done that night, she believed all her feelings for him were genuine – that she really did love him and she still does, now. Walking gracefully down the corridor, Yuri thought hard again.

If you hadn’t mean so much to me, I wouldn’t be here trying to rest my case and trying to take control of my life for once and for good. If you hadn’t mean so much to me, I would’ve been able to resist the temptation to hug and kiss you that night and I would’ve left without even looking back a glimpse. I do hate just how much power you have over me and I still wonder today how did you come to possess it but as I step down this train, I remember my promise. I’ll try my best Jongin-ah. Wish me luck.

              Yuri walked down the steps carefully before jumping out of the train, she hid her eyes away before walking over to a deserted corner. Before she could take another breath, her iPhone buzzed and she jumped a little. Slowly she worked her way to the new message indicated and opened it without so much of a guess from who it was.

Yul honey, are you in Goyang already?  

               Feeling a sudden pang of guilt, she did not reply her mother’s text message. Instead she buried her phone deep inside her jeans pocket before walking out of the station and into the light. As she walked, she looked down at her feet and prayed:

Yes mother, I’m here. For once, I really hope that you would listen to me because the young girl you used to deal with all the time is now a real grown-up. It’s time that I make my own decisions.

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                Kim Jong In ruffled his hair as he breathed in the morning breeze seeping through the curtains facing his balcony. Not opening his eyes, he basked in the morning light and continue to let himself fall victim of his bed’s comfort. He was shirtless and to have the breeze danced on his bare skin was a sign that he could sleep for a couple more hours but his stomach’s sudden growl protested otherwise. He flipped his body over and face down on his mattress, rubbing his face on the cold side of his pillow, enjoying his lazy Sunday. Just when he was about to fall asleep again, his stomach made an even audible growl and he chuckled low under his breath. Geez, when was the last time I ate? He thought.

                Unable to recall, slowly he sat up with his legs dangling on the sides of his bed. He lowered his head down towards his lap, rubbing the sleep from his eyes with his cold palms. Standing slowly in just his boxers, he steadied himself before attempting to walk towards the bathroom. Did I drink again last night? He thought again as a familiar wave of dizziness overwhelmed him.

                Just when he was about to make his way towards his bedroom, his phone beeped and he turned his head back, trying to recall yet again where he had left his phone. After a few more turns, he gave up and made his way towards the bathroom, purposely not shutting the door in case whoever it was would make it to his voicemail. And she did.

Kkamjong-ah, maybe you’re still sleeping. If you do get this, can you give me a call? And maybe we can grab breakfast together later today ... like old times. We can just talk. It’s OK if you refuse to but please just give me a call.

                Kai, who was in the middle of washing his face froze in his spot, his eyes which were heavy and enveloped with drowsiness earlier were now suddenly wide opened and he no longer cared that the water was cascading messily down his bare front and towards his boxers. He stared at himself in the mirror, smirked frustratedly at himself before lowering his head. He placed his forehead against the cold marble tile of the bathroom sink, thinking hard. Of all days, she just had to call me wanting to reunite on this very day, he thought.

                After taking a quick shower, Kai came out of the bathroom looking quite rejuvenated, however, his thoughts were even messier than it were before he went inside. Covering his head with a small towel, he walked his way to his closet, avoiding his phone completely – not that he knew where it was to begin with. Grabbing a quick brown sweater and putting it on in a swift move, he jumped into his jeans in a hurried manner as well. The black denim jeans hugged his waist and legs perfectly, matched with the brown sweater making him look completely simply but classy the same. In just a few minutes, he made his bed and finally found his iPhone under his blanket, ignored the texts and buried it inside his pocket.

                As he entered the elevator, blankly he pressed on the button that said ground floor and waited patiently. He knew he should be thinking about that voicemail and reconsidering the offer that was left standing but his mind could not help but wander off to a particular dark-haired beauty by the name of Kwon Yuri. Later that same night, he had found himself drinking the night away killing his insides as he recalled how she wanted to pause yet again for reasons he did not know. Her eyes were sincere and yet he doubted that he would ever see her again seeing as everything else was just so blurry.

                Kai stepped outside the elevator and ignored the suspicious stares shot his way. He knew he would be getting a lot more individual press-time since he moved out to live alone but he had grown to like the emptiness of his apartment. He had rest his case of wanting to live alone at an apartment close to EXO-K’s dorm because he could not stand being in such a noisy and crowded one when on the inside, he constantly felt like screaming. He made it clear it was not the boys that he wanted to get away from but himself. The manager had to go through a lot just to get him the slightest approval and Suho, his hyung and also the leader of EXO-K did not just stand there watching. Both of them went through a lot and every time Kai remembered it, he winced and had to bite his tongue down blaming it all on himself. Maybe he really was selfish for that reason alone but he could not see any other escape routes at the time and Suho, of all people, understood him the most.

                His mind wandered again to that wonderful night, back when they were truly reunited and what he felt then were definitely one of a kind. He could still smell her soft cologne from her clothes as he hugged her that night, the way her body fits perfectly around his arms as he pulled her close in an embrace. He missed running his fingers through her hair and just staring into those hazel eyes of hers which had always look so tired with a glint of happiness even just the slightest. She missed her captivating smile and how her eyes light up whenever she flashed him one – silently he had hoped that he was the reason behind all that. What was the reason this woman could not leave his thoughts no matter how hard he tried?

                He hated not knowing what had caused such a mess inside his head, he hated it even more knowing that he could search for an answer but he did not know where to begin searching. Images of her beautiful face relapsed every now and then and he felt a familiar pain in his chest – a longing. He hated how right she had made him feel, how weak in the knees she could easily made him. What was this woman doing to him?

If you hadn’t mean so much to me, I wouldn’t be this hard-headed. If you hadn’t mean so much to me, I wouldn’t have ignored her calls knowing that she would be expecting them. I’m sorry that I probably had stepped on the line by hugging you that night but I couldn’t resist you, Yuri. I don’t know for what reasons, reasons that could’ve have been important enough that you had to pause this again. But you promised me Yuri and wherever you are, I hope you’ll remember to fulfill it.

                Kai found his way walking down his usual road, heading towards EXO-K’s dorm absentmindedly. Even if he hated all those years spent without her close and spending some with random girls who meant a little if nothing, he knew all those mistakes he made in between were a part of his journey back to his beloved Black Pearl. As he knocked on the wooden door, he emptied his mind and regained his best composure. Just as he was ready, D.O swung the door open swiftly and beamed at him making Kai smiled genuinely for the second time that week.

“Ah uri Kkamjong! I was beginning to feel that you were never going to make it today.” He blurted out as Kai entered the building, laughing. Always the one welcoming people like a true mother.

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                Sitting on her favourite spot on the couch, Yuri hugged her knees to her chest. She eyed her mother closely as she walked to and fro the kitchen bringing herbal tea and organic snacks for her long awaited beloved daughter just like any mother would. Yuri’s lips curved slowly into a tiny smile and she supported her chin on her knees, still observing her ever so lively mother in action. Just when her mother started to make her way back to the kitchen, Yuri leaned forward grabbing the sleeve of her blouse gently.

“Eomma, gwaenchanhayo. It’s OK. Please sit down.” Yuri insisted with her eyes.

“It’s not always I have you over at times like this, Yul-ah. Look at you, all grown-up and looking amazingly beautiful. I’ve been missing out on you too much.” Mrs Kwon replied sadly.

“Algesseoyo, I understand. But please, I need to talk to you about something. That’s why I’m here because I didn’t think I could tell you over the phone.” Yuri urged further until finally Mrs Kwon took a seat beside her and starting to her daughter’s hair.

“It sounds important. Alright then. Tell me what is it?”

“First of all, I want to apologise to you eomma. Mianhaeyo. I hope you’ll understand and that you’ll hear me.  I don’t think I can – “ Yuri was cut short.

“Hold on dear, I had the kettle running.” Mrs. Kwon jumped to her feet and rushed back to the kitchen. Yuri, starting to get annoyed, followed her close behind.

“Eomma please.”

“Hang on a second, sweetheart. Handling boiling water here.” There she goes again, talking to me like I was still a child.

“Eomma, can you please listen to me?” Yuri said this time, slightly raising her voice.

“I am honey. Lower your voice please, remember who you’re talking to Miss. Can you please prepare a few more of those cups for me?” Mrs. Kwon gestured to a cabinet.

“Wait. Why do we need more cups? We have enough already.” Yuri asked suddenly realising her mother’s preparations.

“Enough? Of course not, silly! We will have them over tonight. Didn’t you get my text?” Her mother beamed at her, leaving Yuri even more frustrated.

“Them? Who exactly do you mean? And no you didn’t text me anything about having people over eomma.” Yuri squinted at her mother, starting to smell something fishy that was going on.

Sighing, Mrs. Kwon placed the cups down and arranged them neatly before looking up at her daughter again. She searched her face knowingly, truly missing her daughter after all those years.

“I know what you’re about to say but I don’t want to hear that anymore from you. Do you hear me?” her mother retorted sternly.

“Eomma please. I don’t want to be engaged to someone I barely know! You just can’t make me do that eomma. Please you have to listen to me.” Yuri’s eyes were now glassy and she knew she would break down anytime soon.

“But you do know him. You and Seungri have gone to the same University together and spent years under the same faculty. What do you mean you barely know him? He is a perfectly nice guy.”

“Eomma, it takes a lot more than that to make you actually want to spend the rest of your life with someone and ... and – “ Yuri swallowed hard, “I think I found him and it’s not Seungri oppa.”

                With that last statement, Mrs. Kwon shot a deadly look towards Yuri and Yuri who was caught offguard, fell completely silent. She had known her mother to be such a lovable woman and never once she imagined that her mother could be this stern and determined about anything in her life.

“That will be the last I’m hearing such things from you, Kwon Yuri. You promised me that if I let you go and live on your own as a singer all those years, you would let me pick someone for you to settle down with. Do I have to repeat myself?” Mrs. Kwon worded each sentence carefully.

“I did not promise such things! I asked of you to only let me go and live alone in the big city as a singer and when I return I would settle down! I NEVER promised to let you choose a companion for me eomma!” Yuri replied as tears fall down her cheeks, raising her voice, shouting each word clearly for her mother’s ears.

                Before Yuri realised what she had done, raising her voice so high like that, her mother’s right hand flew across Yuri’s left cheek so hard that it stung both her cheek and her insides simultaneously. Yuri, realising what just happened had her head low as her dark locks fall across her face, covering her reddening cheek. Her breath grew rapid and tears were now streaming down her cheeks uncontrollably. Her heart felt like it was being squeezed by a pair of hands, practically squeezing the life out of her as time slowly passed. She could not believed what just happened.

                Mrs. Kwon wore a deadly frown and she too, was breathing rapidly and stared unmovingly at her daughter. Her right hand stung so hard that she chose to clench her fist, hiding the guilt away. She was shivering slightly as she realised what she had done. Mrs. Kwon, however, was a much stronger woman compared to Yuri. She was not moved not even the slightest at the sight of her daughter in tears.

“You are a Kwon. Nothing should be less than perfect in this household and that includes your marriage.” Mrs. Kwon finished before turning her back on Yuri.

“Have you ever wondered why I just don’t come home sometimes? All those years?” Yuri continued, wearing an equally deadly frown. The sudden question made Mrs. Kwon stopped dead in her tracks.

“Because back there, I actually lived. I’m not sure if I can call this my home anymore.” Yuri snapped before dashing across the kitchen floor and towards the TV room.

                Scrambling about for her phone, quickly she grabbed her satchel as well and the rest of her belongings. She did not bother to put on her shoes properly before wrapping her bare neck with her scarlet scarf. In a split second, the front door was slammed shut and Yuri was out already out of sight. She dashed in the rain, her face completely wet with tears mixed with the rain falling on her cheek cleaning the pain. She touched her cheek as she walked and she winced – her insides hurt so severely that she was starting to get out of breath. Not wanting anyone to see her, she had her head bowed, walking as she counted her footsteps finding her way back to the station.

             Fishing out her iPhone from her pocket, in a swift move she punched Kai’s number – surprised that she still had him on speed-dial – and started to leave him calls and text messages of wanting to meet immediately. No reply. Maybe she really was alone this time.

                Back at the Kwon’s residence, Mrs. Kwon was still standing glued to her spot. Yuri’s words left a deep wound inside her heart and only she could ever knew about that. Slowly flopping herself down on the floor, she placed the kitchen towel on her lap and stared blankly at it. People had always thought she was a strong woman because no one has ever seen her cried, not even Mr. Kwon. As she sat there, however, overwhelmed with guilt and the need to keep a household intact, tears started to roll down her cheeks and she surrendered.

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A/N: THERE how was that?! Please don't ask me if I cried writing this chapter, just please don't.

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