I don’t know what to think anymore.

I thought I was straight. But since I’ve befriended her things have changed.

 

 

I only met Gwiboon because my Unnie started dating Onew. Then Minjung went and got coupled up with Minho.

That left us two single people.

I thought at first I just really liked hanging out with her.

She would come over my house and she would give me fashion advice and curl my hair. We would go online and look at the latest celebrity news.

And then, we started talking about my dating history.

“Well, Tae, any guys I need to lecture?” she asked innocently while we lay on my bed. I turned red at this.

“N-no, no guy likes such innocent girls like me,” I explained.

Gwiboon just rolled her eyes like it was nothing and went on and on about innocent school girls always being a turn on.

I was too embarrassed to listen.

 

Then we went on  a double date.

These guys Mir and Hongki. They were nice but the whole time I could just feel my jealousy bubbling over, I never get jealous.

She kept touching his arm and batting her eye lashes.

It was horrible.

When she asked me how I felt I told her I didn’t think it was that great but it was nice.

She frowned at that.

 

I decide the only way I will know if I like girls or guys is to use the internet.

I made sure my door was locked and I had headphones on.

I went on the private and typed in the website I heard Minho and Onew talking about once.

I clicked the video and watched.

Nothing.

I felt nothing.

So I switched through various video’s.

I can’t believe this.

Neither guys nor girls were attracting me.

I exited out and closed my computer.

The only thing I learned was what and what that song by Rihanna really meant.

 

I sighed as I watched her from my seat at the window.

There she was, absolutely perfect.

I wonder what our first date would be like?

We would go to that café she likes so much, then hit up the movies for an action flick I liked. We would end it at my house.

I would walk up the steps and she would turn me around and-

“Taeyeon why are you kissing the window?” Gwiboon asked.

I turned around to face the now empty classroom save for my friends.

Minho and Onew looked as if they were about to laugh.

The girls just looked confused.

I needed to explain and quick.

“I was testing to see how my lip gloss would look,” I say lamely.

“Your not wearing lip gloss,” Onew says.

“And why would you notice something like that?” Junghee snaps.

I breath a sigh of relief as the attention is shifted to the now arguing couple.

I gather my stuff and give a swift goodbye.

Gwiboon catches up and hooks her arm with me, claiming I was leaving her behind now like Onew.

 

We get to my house and she flops on the bed.

I leave the room to use the bathroom. When I come back I stop outside the door.

She’s talking on the phone.

“I’m telling you Jinki, she’s hiding something! Don’t give me that crap about her privacy. I know she keeps  a diary she’s a little angel,” She pauses and I hear stuff shifting.

Was she really looking through my things? I find this oddly funny.

I sit for a bit and listen.

“Look, yesterday she couldn’t look me in the eye for some reason. Today she is kissing a window, she likes someone and I will find out who!” Gwibbon says harshly into the phone.

How did she know? Is she psychic?

No, my mom tells me I wear what I feel on my face.

But why is she so determined to find out who?

“Look, I just wanna protect her. What if it’s some jerk like that Jonghyun guy she liked a couple months ago. What do you mean he was nice? Look, if I can’t have her I need to make sure a good person does- oh hey Tae I was just, um, looking for my necklace. Bye Jinki.“

I couldn’t help it. I had thrown open the door at her words.

“If you can’t have me?” I asked. I felt as if I was going to have a heart attack right now. I needed to know. If she really felt that way.

“W-well, I just meant that I, um, dammit. Look I don’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable but I just have kinda felt this way for months-“

“Felt what? Please explain,” I say desperately. I just wanted to hear it once.

“I like you, a lot-“ Gwiboon started.

I launched myself at her. That was all I needed to hear.

 

 

“I told you so,” Onew sang out loud during lunch.

“Look, I just wanna know why you pay so much attention to Taeyeon when-“ Junghee started but did not finish. Onew had grabbed her by the face and kissed her.

“Hon’, I love you, you know that right?” Onew said to her. She was like dough in his hands now.

I rolled my eyes at them. Gwiboon leaned over and whispered, “One time I caught them making up in the chem lab.”

I wrinkled my nose and giggled.

“We should fight, I like when we make up,” I whispered back as I scooted closer to her.

“Nah, let’s just skip to the make up part,” she whispered back and pulled me in for a kiss.