*~Flashback~*

Ding…Dong…Ding…Dong

The school bell rang, echoing around the school hallways. It was lunch time. Children were gushing out from their classroom, heading to the canteen. Their stomps were so loud that it may collapse the whole building and heard from a distance. In a short time, canteen was jam-packed with hungry little monsters. Some had their lunch prepared from home; some would have to line up to get their own food. It was crowded. Children were having conversation among each other. They gossiped about their pets, favorite cartoon series, how they had their first swimming lessons which apart from a little girl with a pink bow tied onto her hair, sitting by herself at the end of the canteen.

When I was ten, I was transferred into a much affordable school after dad left us.

I was sitting, staring at the lunchbox that was prepared by mom. It was her handmade dumplings, as usual. Since we have difficulties earning for our leaving, we would spend really wisely, as little as we could to save up for our family expenses. Therefore, every morning, mom would prepare us the leftovers dumplings for lunch.

I slice the dumpling into half, a yellow scroll of note was in there.

‘My dearest Jung Nicole, Hwaiting! Omma loves you with all my heart!’ It was a note from her.

Mom never fails to leave a note in the dumpling to cheer Victoria and me. A note, which gives us emotionally strength to confront our challenges without having dad around. It was a habit which soon Victoria and I depended on. The taste of the dumpling may not taste as marvelous but a few lines of encouraging expressions would be the only secret that enhances the flavor simultaneously makes one confident.

I smiled and took a bite of the dumpling.

After my meal, I took a walk down the playground before lunch time is over. People were having fun there. They were giggling and jumping out of joy. I wanted to join in, but I wasn’t courageous enough to. They probably wouldn’t want to play with me, might as well take a sit on the swing myself.

Before my could even touch the swing, I was being pushed away. Ouch! I bumped myself on the floor and had bruises on my right palm. It hurts. A chubby looking boy, who is enjoying his lollipop, snatched the swing from me. He knew he was at fault but didn’t bother to help me out. The wound stings me.

‘Need a hand?’ I saw a tiny little hand, which about the size of mine, reach out to me.

I looked up. The sun was shining above the person. I could only see one’s black shade. The person has a boy-cut short hair. I guessed he’s a boy?

I nodded my head.

‘Come.’ He lifted me with his hand holding onto my arms. He was somehow strong for his age.

I stood up and clean the dust on my uniform.

‘Kwenchana?~’ He asked.

 ‘Kwenchanayo~’ I hid my hand behind my back.

However, my movement betrayed me. It caught the boy’s attention.

He held up my hand gently and saw my palm was bleeding.

‘Tsskk!’ the wound stings me again.

He was worried; he furiously turned to the chubby boy who is still swaying on the swing.

‘Yah!! I saw her reaching for the swing first! How could you push her?! It’s your fault she is injured! Are you happy now? He yelled with anger. The chubby boy was starting to feel anxious.

‘Do you want me to inform this to the teacher, to inform the principle, to inform your parents, to announce it to the whole school that you are a BIG BIG BIG BULLY?!!’ he threatened him for apology. The chubby boy was shocked and dropped his lollipop to the ground.

‘Chwesong hamnida. Chwe…chwe..chwe songhamnida. I won’t do it again. I’m sorry.’ He bowed and ran off clumsily.

‘Aishh!! That boy… He…’ He turned back at me.

My teary eyes were looking right into his. I was touched by how he defended me. He was sympathized.

‘Come. I’ll bring you to the infirmary.’ He held my left hand all the way and I followed.

*~end of Flashback~*

‘Hahahaha!!! Oppa! Seriously, when I first saw you, I really thought you were a boy! When you firmly held me up and scolded the chubby Meanie! You were so heroic!!’ I was dancing around the swings.

We were at the playground few streets away from my house. It was the end of the day, the sun was setting. It was a beautiful sight from the playground. It’s as if the colors and intensity of the light is just enough to calm you. The sun is like a great big romantic, inspirational fire in the sky. It was a masterpiece of an emotional symphony.

It was Amber & Nicole’s leisure spot.

‘In fact, I didn’t notice you were a girl until I was at the infirmary. I was shocked! I was like Omo! Why would a boy wears a skirt? WaHahaha-ahahaha!’ I burst out into laughter and it irritated Amber. She was swaying on her swing, on her popsicles, looking annoyed.

‘Yah! Could you stop that! Jung Nicole! Don’t even remind me of my past wearing skirts!’

Amber is a bosom friend of mine that I met during primary. We are counterparts’ mood booster and tree hollow. Amber is like a reflection of me. She too grew under a single parenting family. The truth is, her parents never officially get married. As Amber was a beautiful disaster who created by her parents. It was a mistake when Amber’s mother fell in love with her father, who knew herself was engaged to another man.

After giving birth to Amber, her mom left both her and her father without any traces. They didn’t know where she went and couldn’t contact her. All these years, Amber lived under the same roof with her father, doubtless the reason she acts like a guy. Her father was a responsible man. He raised and gave the best of everything he could to Amber.

Until 2 years ago, accident happened at the construction area where Amber’s father was working. Unstable walls collapsed which caused the debris to fall on him, instantly took his life away. Amber wasn’t able to accept the truth of her deceased father. She kept herself in the house for several weeks. She wasn’t able to cry, she wasn’t able to express how her heart was tearing apart. Since all the while, she had never once shed tears. She was always a fortitude and cool girl. Whenever she faced problems, she would confront them and solve them calmly.

Unfortunately, this was awfully exaggerated; Amber had never overcome such difficulties. A person who she loved and she spend her childhood with, has been taken away from her life forever.

~*Flashback*~

‘Amber! You there? It’s me, Nicole!’

Knock Knock~~#*!

The door wasn’t lock. I swung it opened. The house was a total mess. Books and stuffs were scattered around. It seems like Amber searched for something. I walked in and saw Amber was lying lifeless on the couch. An old photo album was flipped opened on the floor; it was Amber’s childhood photos- her father was piggy backing her.

I picked up the magazines which were on the floor.

‘Nic, am I normal?’ Amber finally spoke up.

I was stunned of what she said. I instantly stopped at what I was doing.

‘Amber, you are…’

‘I know I’m not.’

It stopped me from continuing.

‘I’m not! Nicole! I’m not normal. Can’t you see? Normal human beings would cry when they are sad! Normal human beings would express how they were hurt when they lose their love ones.’

Amber sat up.

‘But I wasn’t able to! Nicole! No matter how painful my heart is, no matter how much I misses dad! I just couldn’t cry! I don’t shed tears! It hurts! Urghh!! I really hate myself!!!’ Amber stood up and flung away the pillow beside her. She clenched her fist.

‘Amber. Listen to me! You are normal! In fact, you are the finest person I’ve ever met.’ I walked to her and cupped her neck. She wasn’t looking at me, but I could still see fury in her eyes. She was breathing heavily.

‘If you aren’t normal, you wouldn’t have defended me from the bully that time! If you aren’t normal, you wouldn’t support me when I was sad and your father wouldn’t love you so much that he was willing to work so hard to raise you up himself.’ I knew she couldn’t control her emotions any longer. Memories of her father flashed through her mind. The last sentence had hit straight into her heart.

‘Amber looked at me.’ I moved my hand up to her face. Her eyes were swollen red.

‘Your father had now gone to a wonderful place far far away. He will be peaceful and safe there. You must pull yourself together Amber! Because no matter how tough it is, I will always support you and hold you up like you did to me back then. My shoulders will forever be there for you to lean on.’

Amber had finally busted out into tears. She wiped them off, but it continues flowing. She was sobbing so hardly that I could feel her body trembled while she was gasping for air. It was the first time I see her cry. I squeeze her tightly into my arms.

She needed someone by her side.

*~end of Flashback~*