01: Candies Don’t Have Expiry Dates

Spring. Spring feels like letters. Crumpled old letters that has been discarded by old women who have no use of them any longer. Or the fresh rain that falls silently over the three children who continue to run free. Spring feels like the lingering scent of flowers or the rushing current of the lake. Then maybe the fishermen will stop by to chat and laugh over their successful catches and the money they intend to make from their worn nets, and the mothers frequent the markets with more enthusiasm. But for now, the three children laugh.

Spring is like a breath of fresh air for a chain smoker, or a sight of the sky for the blind.

That’s why Tiffany loves spring so much.

She runs her fingers along the grassy patch, the blades of grass. The dewy leaves are lush and velvety at her touch, in welcome of the young girl who smiles not only with her lips, but with her eyes. Everything seems to have come alive, very much like Tiffany. But her happiness is never withstood. She allows it to engulf her freely, and her lips purse as she whistles a tune of chiming bells and rustling leaves. Maybe the reason of Tiffany’s joy has been the beauty of spring itself. The youngest Hwang picks at the flowers, and tiny pollen grains scatter across Tiffany’s palm. She swipes her palm parallel to the ground, above the flowers and allows the pollen grains to drift in the wind.

The taste of beauty is exhilarating. The young Tiffany sits herself down under a tree and slips out a note from her pocket. She brings it close to her face and inhales. Faint coffee. Dust.

She runs her finger along the creases of the yellowed paper and the edges carefully. She treasures the piece of paper with everything she has, even if it isn’t much. At eleven, Tiffany doesn’t know much of life, except that those who are gone won’t come back, and those who are left will always pray. Tiffany learns to pray at an early age, despite not knowing much of anything. She learns to ask questions and doubt what she has been thought. Her mother has thought her to pray and to seek answers deep within herself. She remembers them, but she can’t quite understand them. Although, she feels that her mother is only telling her this because she could.

When her mother passed away, Tiffany sits underneath the tree every day and wonders why her. When she has prayed and does so obediently, she questions the sky why her mother had been taken away.

The sky stares back at her. No answers prevalent.

Tiffany puts away the piece of paper. Her mother had not left her any letter or note of some kind, so she takes the one thing that reminds Tiffany of her mother; the electricity bill. Shame, though. She doesn’t recall her siblings scrounging in her parents’ drawers for any kind of memento. All they do is to sit around and cry. Tiffany has given up on comforting them when she struggles to read the faded, tiny words printed on the paper. She can make out the numbers and the stamp at the bottom left corner of the bill, but she can’t identify the words. Not that she has to, though. The one thing she can make out of the words is Hwang and bits of her address along with some words that appears random and non-related to Tiffany. Slowly, as she reads the bill, the empty loss in her heavy heart is somehow lifted.

She remembers. “I’m better looking over you, Stephanie.”

Her mom told her that once. And all she had done was to make a face and correct her mother by saying her name is Tiffany.

The young girl does not hear the muffled footsteps or the hushed whispers nearing her, too far in her thoughts to come back just yet.

“She can’t see us,” the figure whispers.

“Shut up,” the other urges impatiently.

Two figures clad in nothing but shorts and sleeveless singlets, jump out of the bushes, startling Tiffany. Hurriedly, she folds the piece of paper and tucks it in her pocket, smiling bashfully at her two friends. Understanding, the other one holds back, the smile on her face somewhat of a warm welcome that seems guarded yet friendly.

“Got you!” the dark-haired one laughs and runs a hand through her hair.

She nudges the girl next to her and grins. “I told you she’d be surprised, Sica.”

Jessica rolls her eyes, straightening from her crouch when she figures that she looks absurd. Lazily, she sits next to Tiffany, elbows touching, kneecaps brushing against each other’s.

“We were about to go to the market. I heard the Ahjumma is giving out candy.”

Tiffany catches the invitation and looks up into Yuri’s eager eyes. What isn’t worth candy nowadays? Eating candy in spring is nearly as good as eating ice-cream in the winter. Then she hears Jessica’s tired yawn next to her. Yuri’s mouth nearly falls open. She stares at Jessica disbelievingly.

“Come on, Sica, you just slept! Wake up, I really want to go!” Yuri whines.

“And what if we die out of diabetes? Or sleep deprivation?” Jessica asks, one eye open.

“‘Sleep deprivation’? I don’t even know what that means. It’s just one candy! Seriously, Sica, you won’t die from one candy!”

“And how would we know if the candy’s still edible? Maybe it’s expired?”

Tiffany watches as Yuri tries to come up with something as a response. No doubt, Tiffany is expecting something interesting.

“It still tastes good. Expired candy won’t taste good, right?” Yuri tries desperately.

Jessica laughs a little, already knowing what to say to push Yuri into another hole. But her comeback dies in as Tiffany stands up and grabs Yuri’s hand. She brushes off the dirt and grass from her laps and rear with an amused expression. Tiffany is too gullible. But that’s good.

Because she’s forgiving too.

Jessica frowns a little. “You want to get food poisoning too?”

Tiffany laughs and Jessica cringes from Tiffany’s loud voice. “It’s just one candy, Jessi. Besides, it’s spring!”

“And that will change my mind?”

“No? Maybe this will,” Tiffany reaches down to grab Jessica’s hand to lift the sleepy girl to her feet.

And it does, Jessica admits. Just one touch from Tiffany and she is able to suddenly risk food poisoning and probably death and abnormal premature hair loss just by following Yuri eat candy.

Tiffany always makes her change her mind. Again and again. Though Jessica asks herself why, she never seems to be able to find the answer. She settles herself by thinking that she can’t explain the unexplainable.

Yet, somehow, she still doesn’t find the satisfaction in that answer.