I took the liberty of coming to class extra early to get a good seat. A new sense of excitement and adrenaline pounded away at my heart as the clock ticked down to the final seconds of the bell.

One.

Two.

Three.

She raced into class just as the final bell rang and stopped when she met eyes with me. I only looked for a second before giving her that alluring smile that no girl could resist.

Only, her response was new to me. She rolled her eyes as she walked over to me and placed her books on my desk, “That’s my seat.”

Cold. Indifferent. Unfazed.

“Mind if I sit here? Just for today? There is an open seat right here,” I pulled out the chair beside me and looked at her with innocent eyes.

She bit her lip and pushed up the unsightly glasses on her face before taking a seat next to me with an attitude.I leaned back in my seat with a smile of sweet arrogance and looked at her as she brushed the hair from her face and took out a pen. She looked up from her things to turn to me, “Is there a problem?”

What happened to the dorky studious girl that I met two days ago?

Why was she wearing those dorky glasses again?

“No, nothing at all.” I shook my head with a disappointed smile and turned to do my work. When I realized I didn’t have any paper to write my notes.

“Do you have a piece of paper I can use?” I asked in a whisper as I tapped her shoulder.

A slight turn of her head with a straightforward answer of no was what she gave me.

“Oh…Okay.”

She went back to ignoring me for the rest of class. Not a glance. Not a peek. Nothing.

Why? Why? What was this? A game? A ploy? Her sick way of playing with me?

This was my game, not hers. But why does it feel like the tables have turned?

Class ended all too soon and Jinnie shot up to leave. I didn’t have the time to even say goodbye. I watched her charge for the door when the all too famous door stop had her trip and drop all her things.

The cool, getaway she wanted was not one she was going to get with her clumsy ways. This…This was the girl I met two days ago.I got up from my seat wearing an amused smile as I knelt down and helped her pick up her things, “You okay?”

Her cheeks flushed a shade of red new to me that was cute in a way, “I’m fine.”

Her warm face didn’t match her sudden cold attitude as she roughly picked up her things and avoided my eyes. Part of me felt the need to lift her chin up so could look at me. No girl could ever take her eyes off me. Let alone not look at me.

“Look at me.” The words slipped before I could even think them over. Damn it, I wasn’t supposed to say that. Jinnie lifted her head to look at me. No eyes looked at me the way her eyes did.

“Don’t wear those glasses anymore.”

More words that I didn’t mean to say. More words that weren’t supposed to be me.

“Excuse me?” We stood up together in unison my eyes planted on her, unsure for once of what to say.

“Don’t wear your glasses anymore. You look better without them.” I handed her a book and walked out before she could even respond. The LuHan back there wasn’t the LuHan that had girls falling left in right for him. The LuHan back there was one that was for once scared to talk to a girl.

I realized then the book I gave her was mine and I needed it. The last thing I wanted was to go back and face her again after the embarrassing and emasculated words of my blunt feelings decided to make their escape.

I ran my hands through my hair and turned back around only to find her standing there, “You gave this to me, but it isn’t mine.”

She extended her arm out with the book in hand. Indifference plastered on her face.

“T-Thanks.”

Was that a stutter just now? A nervous stutter that meant what? What was this? Why does it feel like everything is rushing to my head compressing it to the point I wanted to faint? A sickness? Hunger?

“You’re welcome.”

My head tightened even more, but this time my heart soon followed. Jinnie turned to leave when I reached out and caught her arm.

“Wait, I want to ask you something.”

Her skin was softer than I imagined. The warmth that emanated from her skin begged to be touched. But I could only let go once her cold stare told me to back off.

“Sorry,” I released her hand from mine and I could feel my own embarrassing blushing cheeks grow red, “I just wanted to know if you wanted to come and have some dinner with me? Tonight?”

I never anticipated anything more than her answer. My heart pounded while everything else tensed up in anxiety. I waited for the few seconds that felt like hours.

“I can’t. I have a paper I need to finish.”

Tension released. Everything sank. Rejection was like that.

I never felt something as painful as hearing a refusal like that.

I was always the rejector.

“Oh, okay.”

She backed away slowly with only the nod of her head as she turned away without an apology.

Was this what I looked like to all the girls that I rejected?

Was this what it truly felt like?

How?

How could she be so heartless?

How could I be so heartless?