[CHAPTER XII]

Chohee's first person P.O.V

Many weeks have passed...

I dont know what's going on lately. It just seems like for the past few years, my life has been... normal.. Well it was never really normal, but at least I got used to it. However, right now my life, my feelings, my mind - it's all over the place. Everything feels like it's spinning around.

It feels like everything that has happened in the past 5 weeks that I've been living in the new place after I lost my home happened overnight.

I'm currently living with my ex-boyfriend, my potential next boyfriend (if only he didn't shy away whenever we were too close), my first crush (and my first and only heartbreaker), my two big brother figures (that I just cannot help but compare to my real brother...), my best friend, and then that one playboy that totally confuses me... I think he likes one of my friends for real though o.o

And even in school! Ever since I lost my house, my oppa's best friends have been annoying me to no end about moving in with them instead of living with the people I'm living with now...

I even found out that that one time when one of them asked me out on a date (but the playboy I mentioned earlier came between us and practically dragged me home) I found out that at that time, that guy was actually planning to kidnap me... -__- what a jerk.

He earned a proper smack in the face for that later! hehe. ...but I couldn't stay mad at him (because he's one of my best guy friends) and I apologized to him. Somehow I even ended up buying him lunch as an apology! WHAT THE HELL! He was the one who was supposed to apologize to me! I'm so stupid.. but I guess I just dont have the heart to stay mad at someone...

My brother has been very annoyed with me because I don't want to live with him and his friends... He's gone totally crazy! He turned my life upside down more than once and he didn't even realize it--and now he did it again!! They say he loves me and cares about me, but he doesnt! ..at least I dont believe that...

Basically, many years ago, he chose the path that took him away from me, and now many years later, he's trying to find a shortcut onto my path again and pull me onto his. I know it doesnt make sense to you, but this is the best way I can tell you about my situation.

I mean, I trust you, and I'd tell you the whole story if you met up with me and we talked for real, but internet just isn't a place for something like that...

As well as a horrible clueless brother, there's a guy who broke my heart... more than once.

I know it's awkward for a guy to listen to a girl talk about guys lol so I won't get too into it.. but...

Sometimes I just wish you were him and he was you... does that make sense? It's weird, isn't it? I'm sorry! :D haha... but I really wish it was you I fell in love with... maybe then, it would have been easier to cope with my life if I had someone like you by my side to help me up if I've fallen down... you've been doing this for me for years already actually, without actually being here.. :)

I miss your emails... I miss you...

Please write to me soon.

I need you...

<3

If you couldn't tell yet. This was an Email to Dongwoon (or rather, IASDWTSNS) from Chohee :)