It’s Christmas Day and the world is celebrating with their love ones, laughing and roaming around the street filled with snow and twinkling lights.

    I wish I am with her, sitting in front of the Christmas tree—all ALONE—whispering sweet nothings on each other’s ears. I wanna touch her now apple hair and pull her closer to me, hugging her intimately as if afraid of her to disappear before my eyes.

    She’s all I want—NEED—this Christmas. Her beautiful smiles and her sparkling eyes… her oh-so-dorky and comical personality… her laughter, her voice. She’s all I’ve ever wished for.

    ONLY HER.

    Some people think I’m one of the luckiest people in the world. I’ve got everything—money, fame, fangirls, tons of talents… everything. Not to mention my supportive loving family and friends.

    Well, yeah, I got all I’ve ever wanted. My dream solo concert was a blast. I’ve performed in front of what? Unbelievably thousands of people cheering and yelling my name. And that was great! Truly great. Who won’t get overwhelm by the warm greetings and bewilder acceptance form billions of people surrounded you? My solo concert is one of the best things I will surely treasure.

    My solo album got abundant praises and my songs which written by my own self hit numerous times on Mnet music hit charts. I’ve got considerable awards from MAMA and been a fashion icon in Korea for my eccentric style.

    Furthermore, I have a collaboration album with TOP this December and for the next year, BIG BANG will have their anticipating come back. Yeh, that’s right. We will again pump the people’s brain out through our music (and I hope netizen will again give their spectacular supports like they did last time).

    Needless to say, I’ve got almost everything. But not really all.

    Being famous is not really the happiest thing on earth. Yep, you have lots of money and innumerable fans here and there. But your personal life will be put into contract. Your love life.

    As a well-known Kpop icon and the leader of BIG BANG I should consider first the effect of dating someone or having a public affection on somebody.

    I am a YG artist and enclosed of it is a policy of having no girlfriend until you reach that particular age President Yang Hyun Seok had given.

    I agreed with that, at first, ‘cause that time I was suffering from a heartbreak that slowly pulling me down and made me weaken. But that’s long time ago. I’ve already moved on.

    I have no problem with the ‘no girlfriend’ policy. In fact, it helped me to focus on my career.

    But… maybe fate has a lot in store for me.

    My existence back then was dreary. Until I met her.

    Yes, until I met that skinny child-like girl who eventually became the most important part of my being.

    My life changed. My whole world changed.

    The milky white skin…

    Her dazzling smile…

    The innocent eyes…

    All of her is indeed PERFECT. Until now I can’t believe she’s really real. And mine. ONLY MINE.

    We’ve both suffered from heartaches. And we both are regaining our strength from each other.

    She’s MY HEAVEN. My BABY GIRL. My BUTTERFLY.

    We’ve been through loads of obstacles.

    We’ve been separated various times. She went back to the Philippines and after that, my days and nights became so long. Everything was seemed nothing. Nothing.

    I couldn’t help but to ask myself: “What if she’d never come back?” “What if she would spend her life time with him? With… him.”

    My world became colorless. Unmoving. Dull.

    The pain was lingering and the depth of damage was immeasurable. This throbbing led me to write songs, transferring all the heartache and loneliness into my music: “MY HEAVEN” “FOREVER WITH YOU”. But then the longing was still there.

    I was waiting for her day and night, hoping that ‘she would be with me tomorrow’.

    And fate is indeed good to me.

    She came back to Korea, where she really belongs—in my arms.

    My life is almost perfect. I have everything a man could ever ask for—money, success, fame, HER.

    But I know there’s no such thing as perfect.

    And that’s proven. ‘Cause we both been AGAIN separated. By her 3-yrs-no-boyfriend contract.

    She’s NEAR yet UNREACHABLE.

    I wanna talk to her; tell her iteratively how much I love her. I want to envelop her to my arms, and kiss her in a most passionate gentle way. But then… I can’t. Unfortunately I can’t.

    She’s a star. I’m a star. We’re both surrounded by bountiful pairs of eyes secretly watching from afar, patiently waiting to catch OUR “lovey-dovey” moments. One simple ’annyeong’ to her—CLICK—we will probably be on the news next day.

    It’s hard when you are yearning to be with someone this Christmas but you’re not allowed to. And it hurts. Badly hurts.

    That contract. It’s like a humungous thick wall intervened us from being together and hinder us to be with each other’s arms.

    The only thing I can do is look at her from afar, watch her every moves… every sway of her body, just listen to every sound of her voice.

    I sometimes reminisce the sneak moments we had and how funny that, those days, just those simple memories tingling me and bringing uncomfortable feeling in my stomach—I’ve got butterfly.

    Oh, how I truly wish to be with her right now. RIGHT AT THIS VERY MOMENT. With her, my BUTTERFLY, my SANDARA.

    “Jiyong…”

    The leader of BIG BANG stopped from his writing and looked up to the person who called his name. “Yes?”

    “We will re-shoot after two minutes. Be ready,” the head staff informed him.

    “Arasso,” Jiyong answered and bowed his head before the head staff left.

    He made a deep long sigh. “Maybe I should just patiently wait fro three years. Three years…” Jiyong muttered to himself.

    He heard the loud clap from the director telling that the recording of the music video was about to start. He quickly closed his notebook and stood up in a hurry, walking his way to the center of the set where his co-member of BIG BANG, TOP, was waiting for him.

    He didn’t notice that his notebook fell on the floor in the process. And a female staff saw it.

    Jiyong was now in the middle of their shooting and the female staff was torn between two things.

    *Pick the notebook (but afraid of accusing her as a ‘meddler’)

    *Leave it on the floor and just let it cover with dust.

    After some sort of internal struggle, she decided to choose the former. She didn’t want Jiyong’s things be cover with nasty dust. (Because she was his fangirl. Ssshhhh!)

   She picked the opened notebook on the floor and accidentally read some of its content.

   “How I truly wish to be with her right now. RIGHT AT THIS VERY MOMENT. With her, my BUTTERFLY, my SANDARA.”

   The female extremely gasped and she quickly covered her stupid mouth. She was lucky the people there were too busy to notice her.

    Her eyes darting around and seemed like the people was too mesmerized as they watched the two BIG BANG member—G-Dragon and TOP—shoot their MV for their very first album as together.

    The female staff made an evil smile. She hid the notebook inside her thick jacket (‘cause it was extremely cold in Korea specially this Christmas ya’ know) and immediately headed out from the set, looking fro a private isolated place.

   The bathroom.

   She entered on one of the cubicle there and sat on the bowl, holding out the notebook in the process.

    She looked at the front page of the notebook and it said: ‘MY DARARY’

    Curious and puzzled, she flipped the next page and read the content.

    “It’s Christmas Day and the world is celebrating with their love ones, laughing and roaming around the street filled with snow and twinkling lights.

    I wish I am with her, sitting in front of the Christmas tree—all ALONE—whispering sweet nothings on each other’s ears. I wanna touch her now apple hair and pull her closer to me, hugging her intimately as if afraid of her to disappear before my eyes.

    She’s all I want—NEED—this Christmas. Her beautiful smiles and her sparkling eyes… her oh-so-dorky and comical personality… her laughter, her voice. She’s all I’ve ever wished for.

    ONLY HER…”

    The female staff continued reading it until she was finished. And she concluded one thing: it was Kwon Jiyong’s personal diary for Sandara Park.

    She became giddy and felt like she wanted to cry! She was certified NyongDal shipper and this thing… this thing proved to her that DARAGON was REALLY REAL. For Pete’s sake, really real!

    Her Daragon instinct activated. She took out her digital camera and thanked God, she always brought it with her. She zoomed the gadget and started taking the notebook a picture. Every page of it.

   She did her ‘work’ as fast as she could, ‘cause the shooting would have its break and Jiyong would be back on his former seat only to be notice that his notebook wasn’t there. He might gonna kill that someone who took his notebook off.

   “Wiw…” the female whispered. She was now done from her spazzing.

   She immediately went back on the set and noticed that the shooting was not yet finish. Lucky day, eh? She sneakily headed towards Jiyong’s chair and put the notebook there discreetly. She swiftly moved on the other side of the set, keeping the distance from that particular place where the Dragon proof found.

   She went back on her original task as a staff and sometimes took some glances on the Kwon Leadah who was singing in the middle of the crowd—director, cameraman, staffs, etc.

   Jiyong was laughing and joking around—a picture of a happy individual this Christmas. But deep inside him… he was a LONESOME MAN. His secret world was in SOLITUDE. He was YEARNING… WISHING… LONGING to be with his most important person in his life.

   His only one, SANDARA PARK.

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A/N: okay, fortunately that female staff put the spazztastic pictures on one of DARAGON’s fansite and translated it to English. (Yah! Don’t pop my imagination here. Haha! LOL)

NOTE: My DARARY here means ‘my diary’

DARA+diary=DARARY (hoho! What a playful mind. xDDDDDDDD )

Merry Christmas everyone!

*What your wish for 2011?

         I wish that this coming 2011, there will be a bunch of DARAGON MOMENTS that will make us giddy as hell! Yeah! How about yours?