The End... Or a New Beginning?
What is this..?
"Hyomin ah, shall we go steady from now on?" Kikwang winked at me. I stared at his face, and couldn't help but I felt my cheeks heat up. He held me in his arms, and pulled me back to him. Whenever I see him, I'd be so happy. His smile was always so perfect. He rarely got angry and always protected me. I felt so deeply in love.
"I guess so," I blushed even more, I suppose my whole face was red. Kikwang laughed at me. I smiled back like a fool. His arms were so perfect. I really hoped we would last forever.
The new school term started, and there was a transfer girl from Japan. Im Yoona. Her family moved there when she was a toddler. She was really, really pretty. She was cute, too. She had an amazing figure. Her smile was the brightest I've seen. Everything about her was so perfect. Even her personality. She was nice and friendly to everyone. She sat next to me as the student originally sitting there had transferred out.
We had chats whenever we could, 'cause the boys kept crowding over to talk to her. Turns out she was from Daegu too! We spoke in satoori occasionally. Well, we talked about everything. Life, boys, school, home etc. She eventually joined my clique, with Sunkyu and Suyeon.
I used to go out with Kikwang all the time, sometimes he would treat me to ice cream, sometimes we would take a stroll in the park, sometimes we would go to the mall together. But that's the past. We don't go out as often anymore. Kikwang'd say that he's busy with schoolwork, or that he has to help out at his father's cafe. I don't blame him, cause his father's business had been bad lately.
He would call me every night, to apologise and tell me that he loves me. It made me smile every night. But that's the past. He hardly picks up my calls now, and texts me less. I didn't care, because he still treats me well at school, and I love him. Even though he spends less time with me now, I forgive him. Because I really love him.
He promised to have lunch with me today. But at noon, I got a message from him. "Hey baby, mianhae, I have something on today and I can't have lunch with you today >.< Jeongmal mianhaeyo." ... I was speechless. He promised. And he broke it. It was about the hundredth time he couldn't make it because of "something on". I knew there was something wrong but I gave in. But I really couldn't keep it in anymore. "We need to talk."
I looked deep into his eyes, "I know there's something going on."
He just stared at me and said, "Mwoh?"
"Kikwang, just admit it. I won't slap you or anything. Because I love you."
He hesitated a little, but confessed, "Mianhae, jinjja mianhaeyo! I really have liked you before, but it was just a crush! I'm really, really sorry and words can't express what I feel now. And over these two months, the feeling is different. I think the one I truly love is Yoona. I can't lie to you anymore, Hyomin." He looked overwhelmed with guilt.
I knew my eyes were watering up, and then tears started pouring out. I wiped them in vain, but I managed to speak between my breaths. "Gwaenchanayo. It's normal to mistake a crush for love. Don't worry, I ain't that fine, but I won't do anything stupid. ... Still friends?"
We stared at each other in silence for awhile, while I wiped the remaining teardrops. "Gomawo," Kikwang whispered as he left. I knew he didn't tell me earlier because he was afraid. But after he left, I cried my heart out. It was the first time I ever felt my heart hurt. Now I know why people are afraid of heartbreaks. Because it hurts, hard, somewhere on the inside.
Suddenly, someone sat on the bench, beside me, and hugged me really tightly. I felt my heart beat really fast and my whole body warmed up again. This feeling... It was so similar to what I felt when Kikwang hugged me... Just stronger. A tad lot stronger. I finally turned around to look at his face. My heart almost stopped. It was Junhyung.
"W-why... Junhyung, why?" I hurt him in the past. I pretended to like him when he wanted to go steady with me. Not long later, I left him for Kikwang. Why did he come back even though I lied to him before? I definitely did not deserve this.
"Shhhh-" he put his fingers to my lips, "do not say a word. Tell me when you feel okay to talk." My mind was blown. Anyway, I listened to him and breathed hard to calm my heart down.
After a few minutes of silence and staring at the stars, I told Junhyung, "I'm okay now... Junhyung."
"Arasseo. And, uh, you wanted to know why?" He smiled at me. I nodded. Then he continued after a short pause, "Well, the reason is simple. It's because-" he paused again and looked right into my eyes, "I. Love. You." And he put his lips to mine. It was a special feeling I never had when I was with Kikwang. Perhaps, my 'love' for Kikwang was just a crush too. Perhaps, this is what you call real love.
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