#09
p l a y b a c k

Jessica writhed on her bed as she woke up that morning, the sun ray her skin through the gaps of the slat screen. An awfully noisy sound came out from under her pillow–turns out a call on her cellphone woke her up. Rubbing her eyes, she grabbed it and pressed the green button.

"Hello?" she asked with a sleepy, hoarse voice.

"Jessica? Oh, thank god. Are you okay?" Jinki's voice came out of the speaker, suddenly asking a thousand questions with a panicky tone in his voice. "I've been calling you since morning! How come you didn't pick up?"

Jessica glanced at the clock. It was over twelve in the middle of the day; even if it was a Sunday, she woke up pretty late. "Oh.. yeah. I'm sorry, I guess I overslept.. thanks for waking me up," she said. "By the way, are you busy?"

"Was just about to ask you the same thing, actually. Not at all," Jinki replied.

"Let's meet up, then."

"Sure. I have something to do first, and of course you might want to gather your energy, so I'll pick you up at two?"

"See you, then," and Jessica hung up.

Tossing her phone to the side, she threw herself onto the bed, staring up the ceiling. It wasn't odd for her to wake up late today, she did slept quite late last night, because of the call she had received.

"Where did you get my number?" Jessica practically yelled into her phone, shock and sudden anger mixed up into one.

"Krystal gave it to me," replied Jonghyun, his voice little. "Please don't be mad at her, I made her do it. But, I really have to talk to you, Jessica! You didn't answer any of my letters or my emails.."

"Why should I? I don't need it, and I know very well you too don't need to contact me anymore, do you?"

"Sica-ya, I–"

"Don't call me that," she spat.

Jessica could hear a sigh from Jonghyun. "I'm sorry."

"I don't need your apologies."

"Please listen to me for a second, will you?" he asked, exasperation evident in his voice. Jessica fell silence, giving him a chance to speak. "I know that I was wrong. But, it's been three years, Jessica. And just so you know, I never said I'll never come back, and I never said I didn't love you anymore, did I? And then you suddenly break off all connections between us, even Tiffany and Krystal did too. I suddenly lost you," he whimpered, and Jessica scoffed at it.

"If you were only leaving to study abroad, don't you think I'll be smart enough to wait? I used to love you, so much, Jonghyun. And surely I will be okay waiting for you, even if takes forever, I will," she said, her tone calm, but piercing cold. "What do you think made me like this? You had betrayed me. I knew you left with Sekyung, I'm not stupid. That's why I had decided to break it off. You didn't need me to wait for you, you had somebody else with you there, anyway. And now you suddenly come back. What's the matter, really?"

There was a few seconds of silence between the two of them. "I.. Wait, how did you–?"

"You were popular back then, Jonghyun. Didn't you think I will hear from one of your friends, eventually?"

"I'm sorry, okay? Besides, it's over between me and her, now. I realized, that I only want you, Jessica. I need you back!" he yelled, desperate. "And, we're not over! A break up is only called a break up when the two sides agree, okay? Well, you may did, but I never said that we–"

"Please, don't use such a pathetic excuse like that with me," she cut him off. "You were the one who made it over between us. Even if you think you didn't do it, the day you left, the day you betrayed me, it was enough to prove to me that you didn't want anything to do with me anymore. I've come to hate people like you, you know? You played with me, left me with nothing but pain and didn't contact me at all, nor did you apologize or give explanations, and now suddenly begging for me to take you back? Don't you think that's highly pathetic of you?"

Jessica's choice of words were cruel and cold when it came to him, for he was the blizzard that had frozen her heart solid.

Jonghyun sighed. "I'm really sorry, Jessica. I hope you know how guilty I feel right now.." he said. "But you're right. I am pathetic. How can I still have the guts to tell you I love you even after I made you hurt you so much, it must seem like big, fat lies."

"As a matter fact, it does. And it doesn't just seem like it, those are lies."

"But, I'm not lying," said Jonghyun firmly. "I'll prove to you I'm not. I'll find you and get you back."

"Whatever. Don't contact me anymore."

Jessica managed to end the phone with such an apathetic behavior, when the truth was at that time, she could hear her heart suddenly breaking. She opened Krystal's message, it said that Jonghyun had called her and asked for Jessica's number; she didn't want to give it to him, but he begged her for it and won't stop bugging her, so she did. Krystal also told Jessica to change her number soon.

There's no need, I already told him to stop contacting me. Seriously, Krystal. Next time, even if he kneels down for you, don't ever help him to get in contact with me. Don't let it bother you, just do well in school. I'll handle this, she texted her sister back, then tossed her phone aside.

Jessica closed her eyes. A sudden rush of unwanted memories were projected in the dark, reminding her of what she didn't want to remember. She choked, as tears were b her eyes, forcing her to blink and let them run down her cheeks. She hated how he makes her feel stupid like this.

Well, she's not stupid anymore, now. Jessica quickly wiped her tears off and grabbed a pillow, falling asleep with a suffocating pain inside her chest.

"How silly," she scoffed at the sudden playback of last night. "I have to call Tiffany later. Now I have to go prepare.."

Jessica got up from bed, and walked to the kitchen to make a small breakfast. Nibbling on her toast, she thought about what she and Jinki will do today.

He will probably take her to another photo exhibit, or photo-hunting at somewhere interesting (for him, at least, but Jessica usually goes along with it and ends up liking it too) like museums and parks–Jinki had even taken her out of town once, like going to a countryside farm he knew or picnicking by a lake near a small forest. She always had fun, though. Even if she complains and whines–not that she does it often–he will always encourage her like he had said he would, and in the end of the day, she'll found herself smiling along with him.

She doesn't know why, but with Jinki, Jessica can get her mind off everything.

Jinki arrived at Jessica's apartment earlier than he said he would. He grabbed his phone to text her that he's waiting in front of the lobby. Not a minute later, he received a short 'be there asap' as a reply. And Jessica wasn't lying, a few minutes later, she came rushing out of the entrance and to his car, hopping into the passenger seat.

"Hey," she greeted him while putting on her seatbelt.

"Hello, sleepyhead. Might I ask you why did you wake up so late today?" asked Jinki as he drove out of the apartment complex.

"I don't know.. I probably was tired of all the posing yesterday, so don't you think it's partly your fault?" Jessica shrugged. "Speaking of that, have you printed our photos out?"

"I have, it's in my house actually," he replied. "Now, I'm going to take you to a photo studio to buy frames."

"Oh, okay.. but can we get some coffee first, please?"

Jinki chuckled. "There's a plastic bag on the backseat, you should check out what it is."

Jessica turned to the backseat, there was a plastic bag. "Starbucks?" she asks as she stretched to get it. Inside it was a bottle of vanilla frappuccino. "You bought this? For me?"

"I know you're a caffein-addict, Sica. Might as well have coffee every time you're with me," Jinki said.

"That means I will be having coffee a lot more than I have," smiled Jessica as she opened the bottle and took a sip.

He smiled along, turning to examine her smiling face, but then his attention was caught on something else. "You have dark circles," he said suddenly, catching Jessica off guard. "And your eyes are swollen. Are you sure you overslept because you were tired?"

"Yeah, um.. it's, uh.. I cried," she stammered, looking for an excuse reasonable enough. "There was this drama on TV last night, it was so sad that I shed tears. So, there was this guy who liked this girl, but the girl left him and at the same time his brother died, and he suddenly had a trauma. It was heartbreaking, you should see it sometimes!"

Jessica babbling looked very cute and Jinki couldn't help but laugh. "Whatever you say, Miss Jung," he said, keeping his eyes back on the road.

She hit him in the shoulder softly. "Why do you call me that so much?"

"Because you're a lady and your family name is Jung. But that hit on my shoulder just then, it got me thinking.." he scrunched his face like he was in thought. "You really are a girl, right?"

A bigger hit landed in Jinki's shoulder, adding more pain than the previous one. "Jerk," Jessica frowned at him, but he laughed.

"I was just kidding, Jessica!" he said, reaching out to pinch her cheek. "You're the prettiest girl I know, how could I ever question that?"

A rush of crimson raised up to Jessica's cheeks, and she just stared at Jinki dumbfounded. Split-seconds after he let go of his grip on her cheek, the realization dawned on her, and she turned away from him, embarrased. "Aren't you such a sweet talker," she mumbled.

Jinki laughed. "Get over my charm and let's get out. We're here."

The car was parked in front of a modern building, with glass walls and doors, and above it a black signboard with writings in ice blue that says, SkynDMynd Photos.

"Sky-N-D-Mynd Photos?" Jessica spelled the unusual name.

"Skyndymynd Photos. Seukindimindeu," Jinki corrected. "Yeah, the owner is an Icelander. The name's kind of outlandish, yes, but it's kind of funky too, don't you think?" Jessica just nodded. "Come on, let's go inside."

They both went inside and were greeted by a hall of photos, lined on each side of the wall. It was quite fascinating, but they decided they should find the frames first. They went through the shelves of displayed frames and even asked the help of an employee by showing the picture Jinki kept on his iPad, asking what frame will be the best. Eventually, they chose simple black and white frames because the employee said it brings out the color of the picture. After Jinki paid for it, they went back on their way.

"So, we got the frames. Where are we going next?" asked Jessica.

"My house of course," replied Jinki. "Our purpose of buying frames was to frame the pictures, so let's do it now."

Jessica was excited at the mention of going to Jinki's house. She had always been curious about it, she just didn't show it. "Your house? Is it far?" she asked, rather eagerly, but she quickly toned it down.

"It's in Ilsan. Kind of far from your place, but it's not too far from our office," he replied. "And it won't take long from here too, I hope."

Nobody would ever thought that Jinki lived in a large two-floor townhouse, located in an elite suburban area in East Ilsan district.

Even Jessica didn't. Seeing how humble he was, she thought that Jinki lived in an apartment just like her, or if he did own a house, it wouldn't be this big.

It was painted in white, and had large window walls covered with white drapes from the inside, other than that was white concrete. His door was black metal-framed glass doors, and his window-frames were black as well. His front yard was just green grass, but it gave out a modest feeling somehow. Parting his territory with his neighbors' were tall hedges. His neighborhood was peaceful too, with every people and children passing by his house giving him friendly greetings.

"What are you standing around for? Come on, let's go inside," Jinki snapped Jessica out of her trance when he unlocked the door.

She followed him inside, her eyes wandering around the interior as she took off her high heels. After placing them on the shoe rack, she and Jinki walked further inside, passing what seemed like a living room, to where the real living space was.

Jinki's place seemed comfortable. All wooden floors, light-filled and, spacious. There was an LCD screen and home theater set up in front of a double recliner chill out sofa and a coffee table. His desk was at the back of the room near the kitchen, both his computer and laptop on it, as well as a printer, some photo frames, a folder holder and a pile of document, and his DSLR camera sitting on it. There was a wall of sliding glass door to the back yard, and other than that were only a few doors surrounding the room, and he said it was the door to the guest room, his camera room, the guest bathroom, and the stairs to the second floor at the corner of the room.

"Sorry if it's kind of messy.. honestly, I fell asleep on my table last night and woke up kind of late too, so I didn't get to clean up," explained Jinki as he picked up a jacket lying on the floor. "Make yourself at home, though. Would you like anything?"

"I'd ask for coffee, but seeing as you already bought me a bottle, no thanks," Jessica replied, taking a seat on the sofa. "You live here by yourself?"

"Well, yeah," he replied. "Bought this house after one year of working in L. I had some money untouched in my bank account, so I figured, why not? And then I moved from my old apartment to this."

"It's nice. You must work really hard for it."

"It's certainly worth cleaning tables, mopping floors and walking around smelling like coffee," Jinki chuckled. "During college days, I worked part-time in a coffee-shop, and I've already received freelance gigs. I saved up the money and used it on this. Back then, even a one year payment wouldn't make the house."

Jessica nodded in understanding. He was a really hard-working person.

"Come here, Sica, don't you want to see the prints?" Jinki gestured for her to come over.

Jessica approached his desk, and he took the prints from the printer's output tray and gave it to her. It was printed out neatly on a glossy photo paper, zoomed and cropped, and it was indeed bright and colorful, emphasizing the comic looks on their faces.

"Nice, isn't it?" Jinki smiled at Jessica, handing over the white frame for her.

They were busy framing the pictures, with her sitting on Jinki's chair and he sitting on the desk, and soon the pictures were framed nicely. She stuffed her frame carefully inside her bag while he put his on the desk, between the other pictures that Jessica has just noticed now.

"Is this you?" she picked up a picture of a man likely to be him, wearing what seemed like a school uniform. "Oh my gosh, you look really decent!"

Jinki laughed. "Yeah, it was taken during my senior year in high school. I was studying at the library and one of my juniors from photography club came up to me and asked if they could take a picture of me. I said yes, and they gave a print for me," he told. "I didn't take a lot of pictures of myself when I was still in high school, other than pictures for report cards and such. So, I thought I'll keep this one as a reminder."

"I see, you seem to be very reserved during your school days," said Jessica, putting the photo back, then picked up another picture of him and three other guys. "When was this taken?"

"My last semester of college, with my juniors, Minho and Taemin, and that's Kibum, the one who owns the K.AL, remember?" he said as he pointed to each person. "Minho and Taemin were my juniors. Kibum was younger than me, but he was in the same year as I was. That time, I had just turned in my thesis and done a presentation, and they waited for me outside the auditorium."

"You sure have a lot of friends," she commented.

Jinki who was playing with his laptop, just chuckled. "Not really.." he said, and suddenly there was a sound of phone ringing coming out of his speakers. "But if you want to know.. I have Taemin calling me right now," he simpered.

"Seriously?" Jessica pulled her chair towards the laptop, where Jinki clicked the green 'talk' button on his screen.

A screen popped up immediately, black at first with a loading symbol at the center as the green light of the webcam started to blink on. It stopped loading and colorful pixels replaced the black screen, showing a boy with a mushroom-like blonde hair, beaming at the camera with his gummy smile.

"Hey, hyung!" Taemin greeted, his voice tinny and digitized through the speakers, but didn't make it less cheerful of him. "Saw you online and I thought I'd give you a call."

"Really, now? It's nice to hear from you again, you haven't contacted me for weeks now," replied Jinki, smiling at the camera as well. "How's the States?"

"The Big Apple lives up to its name, I guess," he hummed. "Except for the fact that the internet here is way ancient compared to Korea, all is well.."

"By the way, where's Keroro?" Jinki snickered, before he–and Jessica who had been listening to the conversation as well–was startled by a sudden gravelly yell of, "I heard that!"

A tall figure walked from behind the camera to where Taemin was, joining him on the sofa he was sitting on. "Long time no see, Chicken Boy," he smiled at the camera.

"Back at you, Minho," Jinki grinned, then he turned to Jessica. "He's handsome isn't he? Come here, Sica!"

Jessica shifted her chair closer to Jinki, and he puts his arm around her shoulder, pulling her even closer. She couldn't help being embarrassed about that, and in front of his friends too.

"Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum, this is Jessica. Say hi," he introduced her, and she just smiled sheepishly, waving at the camera.

"Uh, hi..?"

"Hello, noona!" Taemin greeted her, enthusiastic all of a sudden. "I'm Taemin~ Hyung never told me that he has a girlfriend.."

"Taemin-ah, we're not dating," Jinki remarked.

"Really? But you two look so good together," Minho commented. "And noona is so pretty too."

"Cut it out, Romeo," Jinki rolled his eyes at the younger boy's sweet-talk. "Isn't it late there? Shouldn't you guys be going to sleep?"

"Please hyung, we're not kids anymore," Minho chuckled, and Taemin nudged him in the ribs. He glared at him, but Taemin shot him a look already.

"Minho! Don't you see that we're interrupting something?" Even though he was whispering, the microphone caught his words and it made Jessica giggle. "We're not going to sleep now, but we still have a lot to do, so.. you have a nice day, okay, hyung?"

"Okay, you guys too. Call me again sometimes, okay? And with good timing!" Jinki waved at them.

"Don't worry, hyung. Bye, Jessica noona!" Taemin waved back, along with Minho too, their obnoxious giggles coming out of the speaker and they hung up.

Jinki closed the window, and turned to Jessica. "Sorry about that," he sighed, smiling gently.

"What are you apologizing for? They're nice boys, and yes, Minho is handsome just like you said," she giggled.

"That lover boy. Been like that since college."

"What are they doing there anyway?"

"I don't really know either," Jinki shrugged. "After Taemin graduated a year ago, and we celebrated with Kibum too, they both made this spontaneous decision that they were going to leave for America. Me and Kibum thought that they were just kidding that time, but they were serious after all. And luckily, Minho had a friend in NY, and he was going to move back to Korea. He sold Taemin and Minho the house for a cheap price. Soon the two kids started working their asses off for a one-year cost of living in NY, and finally moved there a month ago. They speak English quite well, I heard that they already started looking for jobs."

"So they went there without any plans at all?"

"Yeah, spontaneous. But they seem like they're doing fine, though. I mean, they have each other anyway."

"What are they, by the way? Taemin and Minho?"

"Childhood friends," Jinki smiled. "They've been together since forever, believe me. Just like you and Tiffany, only, they go way, waaay back. Literally childhood best friends."

Jessica was amazed at Taemin and Minho's relationship, how tight their bond was, and even their friendship with a college senior like Jinki. It was just like her and Tiffany; the only thing was, Jessica wasn't sure if she would want to move to a strange country impetuously without any plans. It's way too risky.

Suddenly, she could feel the chair she was sitting on rotated, and then she was facing Jinki. "What?"

"Why are you spacing out? Thinking of something?" he asked.

"Nothing, just thinking what would my life be if I were to follow their steps like that," she shrugged.

"Well, what would it be?"

"I.. don't know. It's risky, don't you think? What happens when things don't turn out the way we want it to be?"

Jinki hummed, thinking. "I don't know either, but that's why it's called a spontaneous decision," he answered. "But if you ask me, I say that'll be good for you, you know? Didn't I say you ought to do something spontaneous in your life for once?"

"I'm not sure how, or what it may be," said Jessica, looking up at him. "But if I do, you'll be with me, right? You said so."

He was surprised for a while, stupefied by her gaze, but then a gentle smile spread across his face. "Of course," said Jinki, taking a seat on the desk again. "Now, let's say you're going on a spontaneous holiday, to wherever you want, for however long you want it to be, with me; where do you want to go?"

Jessica's eyes lighten up. "Paris! Or Italy!" she exclaimed, clapping her hands. "I'd go anywhere in Europe, honestly. It's a beautiful continent.."

"Okay. We'll go to Europe someday," he beamed at her, patting her hand.

"Wha–"

He laughed, and spun her chair. "Don't look at me with those sparkly eyes," Jinki said, as he pulled Jessica by the hand and jigged around, dragging her along. "I'm bored though, shall we do something?"

She stared at him in daze, before nodding. "Let's do something," she smiled.

Jessica and Jinki ended up curling up in front of the TV, watching Mamma Mia! while eating his homemade macaroni and cheese–which she never thought that he could actually make, and it tasted good too. After the movie, they talked in the backyard until sundown. Jessica cooked bulgogi as the dinner dish for the two of them. Jinki stayed in front of his computer after that, doing work while letting Jessica read one of his big collection of books. He kept the radio on, and sung along to the ballads that were played while working. Jessica fell asleep for a short time, and Jinki took the chance to take pictures of her adorable slumbering state. She woke up with him sitting next to her on the couch, watching the soccer game that was on. But it got late, and Jessica had to go home. Jinki drove her there, once again separating in front of the lobby, with the exchange of thank yous, I had a good times, and another kiss on the cheek from her, before she went on her way, disappearing behind the elevator door.

It was late when Jinki drove back home. He had a good day with Jessica today, just like the other days the two have spent together.

Although today there was something that worries him; the dark circles under Jessica's eyes. Jinki knew that she doesn't watch dramas other than those american serials on cable TV, and she would never cry over them. Even though she smiled a lot today, there was something hidden behind them. He too, tried to cheer Jessica up today, and goodness, it worked. But he still couldn't just let it go.

Jinki reached for his phone, dialing a number, and the speaker.

"Hello?" a hoarse voice sounded in the car. "It's Tiffany."

"Hey, this is Jinki. Sorry for calling you this late," he said. "But, I thought I should ask you something."

"About Jessica? Didn't you guys went out together today? Did something happen?" she started throwing anxious questions–and Jinki found it amusing; she really does care for Jessica like a mother.

"Don't worry, we both had a good day today. But something worries me, though," he began. "You know, Sica met me today with tired, swollen eyes. I asked her, but she said she cried over a drama, and we both know Jessica isn't one do to that. Do you probably know something about that, Tiff?"

Tiffany was silent for a while, then she sighed. "I don't know if I should tell you this, but it might be because of a call from her ex last night," she told.

"Her ex?"

"Jinki, I understand that you worry about her, I do too. But, I think you should ask Jessica regarding those things, that's all as far I can tell you," said Tiffany. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, me too. Thanks, anyway, Fany-ah.."

"Wait, Jinki," she said before he hung up. "If you do ask her about it, please don't make her sad and help her? Jessica had gone through tough times, and she became better after you're with her. So, can I trust you?"

He smiled to himself. "You can always trust me about Jessica."

© hellopsr stories, 2012

Soooo, there you have it. Jonghyun. The ex. But there is more to him, though, please anticipate it! I will reveal it, two more chapters after this one~ This was some sort of a filler chapter, I don't know. But it's nice to write about Jinki's house. It's my dream house, lol. I'll update more soon! ♥