I’m Kim Hana and I have a huge secret. Promise you won’t tell?

Okay, so I have this best friend. A guy best friend. And I like him a lot. Now, do you know who this guy best friend is? You will be VERY surprised. He’s Lee Jinki-slash-Onew from SHINee. I don’t think he knows about my crush on him since I never told anyone, though I don’t try to make it obvious either. So I’ll let you know every single detail, but promise me you won’t tell a single soul.

Onew and I have been best friends since we were in diapers. No kidding! My mom and his mom are like, the bestest of best friends. He was born only a few months before I was, so our isn’t really that big. His mom would always invite my mom over so Onew and I could have play dates. We did almost everything together, went to the same school and even had study “dates” after school, every day.

When Onew became a trainee, we still got to see each other but not as often. When Onew debuted, though, we only got to see each other once every few months since he was so busy. Now, at present time, we rarely get to see each other! I think the last time I saw him was probably last year, Christmas 2011, and that was our first meeting in like, a year and 6 months. Despite the fact that we almost never get to see each other anymore, my heart and mind still haven’t removed the admiration I feel for Onew.

Now, before I go too far into the nitty-gritties, let me tell you how my crush on Onew started.

We were walking home one day after school (he lives in the house right in front of mine, btw.) when he suggested that we race going to my house, so we did. Being the clumsy girl that I am (I’m even clumsier than Onew. Would you believe that?), I tripped and scraped my knee on the sidewalk.  I couldn’t walk properly because my knee kind of twisted (and mind you, it hurt so badly!!!) so Onew offered to give me a piggyback ride going home. When we got home, he offered to take care of me by cleaning my wound and helping me move around. He wouldn’t stop apologizing!

“Na, I’m reaaaaaaaally sorry! Please forgive Jinki oppa. I’m soooooo sorry. I shouldn’t have suggested that race! Please forgive me! Pleeeeease,” he said, his voice almost breaking. I felt bad for the poor guy but at the same time, I wanted to laugh at his silliness too.

“Hey!” I poked his shoulder. “Stop apologizing already! It’s fine. It’s nothing serious, right? Quit whining.”

“But look at your knee! You scraped it and twisted it and it’s all my fault.” He touched my wound and I winced a bit.

“I’m soooooo sorry, Nana.”

“Jinki, I already said it was fine!”

I opened my arms for a hug.

“That’s right! A hug from me would make you feel a whole lot better,” he smiled and gave me a hug.

“Thanks for taking care of Hana, Jinki. Don’t worry about her wound! It’ll heal in a few days,” my mom told Onew.

“Alright then, Aunt Jooyeon. I’m so sorry again for what happened,” he bowed.

“It’s okay. No worries.” She glanced at her watch. “It’s getting late. Maybe you should go home now; your mom might be worried.”

“Yup, I’ll go now.”

He walked to the door but stopped at the couch to say goodbye to me. He bent down and gave me another hug.

“Please rest for me, okay?”

“I will, Jinki oppa.”

He ruffled my hair and gave me a kiss on the forehead. The moment I felt his lips on my forehead, I instantly felt like I had made contact with something that caused an electric shock and ZAP! After that kiss, I started liking Jinki oppa. Who knew that one kiss could make me change my way of seeing him?

So that’s how my crush on Onew started. Up until this day, I still haven't told him how I felt for him. I really wish I could tell him. I wonder how he’d react if and when I do decide to tell him but for now, I’ll just have to keep dreaming and pretend to be my boyish self the next time we see each other.