“Hello, is this Ms. Kim? My name is Jason Myers, I am calling from the University of Sydney, Australia, regarding your application.”

I gulped. “Yes, this is she.”

My heart was thumping in my chest a million miles a minute. I excused myself out of the room and walked quickly to the lounge where I sat down immediately. My legs didn’t seem like they could hold me anymore.

“Well, Ms. Kim, I am sure you are aware of the number of applications we receive every year. And we are only able to accept the best students with highest results who strive to achieve in every aspect of their life.”

My heart beat even faster. I anticipated his next sentence however I wasn’t sure if it was going to be a happy or sad ending for me. His answer was ambiguous.

“The results of your finals have been very impressive.” I let out a deep breath and smiled. “However, the cutoff of entrance this year has been changed to 98 instead of 97 due to the number of applicants we have received.”

My heart froze in my chest. I could feel fear rising in my throat and my eyes started to turn a bit blurry.

“Therefore I am sorry to inform you, Ms. Kim, that you have not been accepted at our university, but let me assure you it not due to a lack of trying. The standards of students this year has been impressively high, and you have just fallen short of the mark by 0.7 of a percent.”

I sat still, not moving, trying to register his words. You have not been accepted. You have fallen short.

“Ms. Kim?” He asked over the phone. I quickly wiped my eyes and realized that I had been crying a little.

“Yes, I’m here, sir,” I amended, trying not to sniffle. “I just want to thank you for the opportunity you have given me and for your time reviewing my application.”

The man sighed. It seemed he felt sorry too. “Once again, Ms. Kim, I’m very sorry to bring you this bad news. I have passed on your results to the other universities of Sydney, however I fear that it is out engineering program that you are after?”

“Yes, sir,” I replied. “I heard it’s the best in the world.”

I felt him smile over the phone. “Well, thank you for that, Ms. Kim. I wish you the very best in every endeavor of your life, and please believe me when I say I wish things could have been different.”

I thanked him and shut off the phone. So, I hadn’t gotten into the university I wanted. It wasn’t the end of the world, right? I bit my lip. Yes, it was. I had my heart set on that university; it would make my parents so proud to say their daughter went to school abroad in Australia. I wanted it for myself, too – I genuinely had an interest in engineering, and that school had the best resources for learning in the world. What was I going to do now I wasn’t accepted? I didn’t really apply for any local universities because I was so set on going to Australia. I don’t mean to sound conceited but I was sure I had gotten in. I studied so hard this year, but it wasn’t worth it. You have just fallen short of the mark by 0.7 of a percent.

I gulped and cried harder. If only I studied that little bit extra, I would have been accepted.

“Hana?” Woohyun called, before finally seeing me sitting on the couch. As he came closer, his eyes were full of concern. “Are you okay? Why are you crying?”

He came and sat down next to me and wrapped his arms around me. This only made me cry harder. Why was he being so nice to me? I was just a failure who couldn’t be successful in the only thing she worked hard for.

“Did you…?” He asked timidly. I shook my head and buried it into his chest and sobbed harder.
He winced and rubbed soothing circles on my back. “It’s okay, Hana, shh….”

We sat there for a few moments. “At least you’ll be closer to me,” he said cheekily. I knew he was trying to cheer me up, but I cried even harder.

“Woohyun,” I sobbed. “I missed entry by 0.7 of a percent.”

I felt him tense. “Can you talk to the dean? Convince him to change the rules for you, a bit? 0.7 percent, damn,” he said, hitting the sofa arm next to him.

I shook my head. “They raised the cut off this year. I scored 97.3, but they changed the cut off to 98. So I can’t.”

He pulled me away from him. “You got 97.3, Hana?” I nodded.
“Damn, girl, you should be so proud of that! Screw Sydney. If they don’t accept you, then they’ve lost a good student. Plus, there’s lots of good engineering schools, here, and everywhere else in the world. It doesn’t have to be Australia, Hana.”

He looked down at me.
“I know you wanted to go there really bad,” he whispered, tucking my hair behind my ear. “But it’s not the end of the world. Did you apply for any other universities? Hmm?” I shook my head.

“Well,” he said, helping me up to my feet. “We have something to do these next few weeks!”

“No, Woohyun,” I choked, wiping my eyes. “You have to help your brother. Plus, what about your university? And you need to go to school tomorrow to help set up for the hall for our graduation ceremony. Did you forget?” I teased a little.

He pouted at me. “No, I didn’t forget! I knew all along!” He hugged me again close to his body. “Come on, you little smart pabo."

Graduation came quickly. I found out that Woohyun was offered a full scholarship to the football collage he wanted. He would do a double major of engineering and football, and still live in the local area to impress his father and be with this mother. Boohyun was doing well – he had recently learnt to walk again, but it was only to chase Woohyun for stealing his dirty magazine away from him in the library. Those boys, I just didn’t know what to do with them!

Hanbyul had gotten into journalism at the local arts college, and although she was aiming for law, it was close to home and she could be with Sunggyu. Sunggyu had gotten into the same college as Woohyun, also majoring in football. I was happy for them as they got to be together. Hanbyul and him were going strong and well, and I had this feeling that they would last a long time.

Everyone was happy. Everyone had gotten into a degree or college that they wanted to. Except me. Everyday I was getting more nervous and anxious that I would end up have having to attend the local college where all the juveniles went and smoked drugs and rank all day because that was the only university that didn’t require an application beforehand. Trust me, I applied everywhere, but most of them already had closed their applications many months before I even considered applying there.

News had gotten out of me failing to get into Sydney, although I had no idea how, and I could tell people pitied me. Me, the girl who was so sure she would get into Sydney that didn’t apply for any other universities because she was too good to stay at home and go to school. I couldn’t blame them, because that was how I saw myself.

On the night of graduation, I prepared myself for the most boring night of my life. Four hours sitting on a stage, waiting for my name to be called out amongst the two thousand graduates at our school. Waiting for my name, walking across the stage for ten seconds, pose for the camera very awkwardly and then sit back down.

I guess the only thing that kept me going throughout the night was Woohyun’s valedictorian speech that he would make at the end before everyone left to parties and celebrated the official ending of high school.

Finally, he stepped up on the podium, but not before giving me a wink.

“Hi everyone, my name is Nam Woohyun and I’m the valedictorian of the graduating class of 2012. I just want to thank all the parents and teachers for coming tonight to celebrate this moment with us. We made it!” He yelled to us, sitting behind him. “We finally did it, guys. We’ve finished high school! It’s the end of the beginning. We’ve finished our school days, but its only the start of our careers. And I know its nervous; some of us have gotten into the university of choice, some have fallen short, some have made alternate plans. But it doesn’t matter what anyone says, because as long as you have worked hard, as long as you are happy, as long as you are healthy, you will go long way in life.

Most of us have been here since the beginning of grade eight, when we were little kids fresh from primary school. We thought we were the best, until we stepped foot in here and saw the big seniors and how scary they looked just walking along the hall to class. Grade eight was the year where everyone was still friends, where everyone was trying to figure out who they were and what they wanted to do with life. Then, come grade nine. We started forming our little groups and distinguishing what was cool and what was not. Grade ten, some of us discovered partying and girls.” He paused and chuckled. “It was our last year to really have fun before grade 11 and 12 killed us with exams. Pressures of what we wanted to do after high school, pressure from our parents all started to set in.

I know it’s been a long journey, but really looking back on the days, I wouldn’t change a thing. We’ve made new friends, lost some friends, talked to people who we would’ve never before, loved and lost.” He looked directly at me. “This is the last time we’ll be seated together as the graduating class of 2012. I wish everyone the best of luck for everything you do in the future, and I look forward to see you at the after party! Woo!”

Everyone cheered loudly. It was the end, but it was also the beginning. And even though I had no reason to be happy, I still felt happy. The ones I loved were happy, and that was all I could really ask for