Miyawaki Sakura knew from the start that she was… different.

 

She doesn’t remember the exact definitive point where she started to believe this. It could have been the constant rewatches of that one scene in John Tucker Must Die, or the extensive collection of Sailor Uranus figures, or the poster of Irene from Red Velvet taped to her ceiling above her bed that she swore to her mom it’s because she wants to look like her. Or it might have been the way she found absolutely no interest in boys at all and tuned out of every conversation regarding boyfriends or how hot the members of a boyband were. But, she’s pretty positive that there were telling signs of how gay she actually was before she even learned what the word meant.

 

She’s lucky to grow up in an environment where she wasn’t shamed for her uality. Her parents showed confusion but generally showed acceptance, and her best friend and next-door neighbor, Kim Chaewon, was quick to slightly-offensively congratulate the seventeen-year-old Sakura with an obnoxious, “Thank God! I was waiting for you to say something!” Sure, she may have gotten a few judgemental comments and stares from people who barely knew her at school, but Sakura was never the type of person to care too much of other’s negative opinions of her. She was simply thankful for what really mattered. Plus, she had a strong, popular cheetah of a best friend that would rip the next person who harassed Sakura to shreds. 

 

Chaewon was different from Sakura in many aspects. uality, popularity, most interests, personality. Chaewon had always been the popular, athletic girl who was spotted at every party in town and found solace in a shopping spree at the mall. Sakura was the quiet, studious type that excelled in her studies but seriously lacked in the athletic department, with a strong love for video games and her stan account online and frankly, nothing else. But, Sakura figured that was how they were able to work so well together as friends since she moved next door from Japan as a child. She had never felt a desire to be different or change any aspect of herself, and Chaewon never made her feel otherwise.

 

Well, except for one thing.

 

Whenever Chaewon’s seemingly endless cycle of being heartbroken by different boys came to the point where she’d climb through Sakura’s window at three in the morning like a robber with a stuffy nose and loud sobs, it’s become routine for the Japanese to pep-talk her best friend with how great she is and how dumb boys are and pretend to lose at Mario Kart until she feels better. While Sakura would never desire the touch of a man, especially one drowned in toxic masculinity like Chaewon seemed to be attracted to, she had to admit that she wishes she could feel an ounce of what being in a relationship was like. 

 

The problem was the only other sapphic woman she had known growing up was a, for lack of better words, disturbing individual in her year who Chaewon swears came from the depths of hell and stares at Sakura like a starving animal and she was a piece of meat. Or to simply put, not Sakura’s type. Not to mention, even if Irene herself burst through the door and professed her love to Sakura, would she reject her. There’s already someone in her heart. 

 

Huh Yunjin. 

 

A theater major, and former president of their high school’s theater club. (Also, a really hot girl. But, that’s secondary, of course.)

 

Dark red hair always flowed perfectly down her back, kind, big brown eyes that resembled those of a golden retriever, and a loud, boisterous voice that filled the room like a symphony, especially when she laughed, and God she’s sure she’s an angel sent from above whenever she hears her sing. To Sakura, Yunjin was the definition of perfect. The only problem is with perfection comes being untouchable. And despite being her first friend since her move from Japan, (Yes, even before Chaewon.) She quickly floated away from her as her popularity and interest in the school’s theater club grew. Since then Sakura has been chasing after the opportunity to be in her life once more. Well, to the best of her abilities, which usually meant never even speaking to her first and thinking just being in the same room as her was progress.

 

It’s why she’d decided at the beginning of the year as a drunken New Year's resolution to get closer to Yunjin. Unfortunately for her, it would have stayed a drunken proclamation if it weren't for how stubborn Chaewon was for her to keep her word. She understands, she wants the best for her friend. But, it is now the middle of March and she’s dragged to the university’s musical by the ear. A part of her can’t decide if she’s anxious, or hopeful, or simply in pain from the way Chaewon is literally pinching her ear the moment she gets out of the car. 

 

“Chaewon–ugh–stop, that hurts.” Sakura shoves Chaewon’s hand off of her left ear, rubbing the redness of her lobe (Those damn straight girl nails.) and making a face at the other. “You didn’t have to actually do that.”

 

“If I didn’t, you would have been stuck playing that damn game again.” Sometimes, Chaewon truly sounds like her mother. Even more than her actual mother. “Plus, Yunjin’s playing gay in it. I can’t believe you don’t want to see that.”

 

“Well, yeah, because I’m not the one she’s playing gay with,” Sakura mutters under her breath, fingers mimicking air quotations as she mocks the phrase. “You know I was doing something really important, too. You could have at least let me know beforehand.”

 

“Oh, please. I’m sure the 40-year-old man behind the Hatsune Miku profile picture on Twitter will be fine if you’re out having a life for a second.” Chaewon swats a hand dismissively. “Plus, it’s, like, free entertainment! I’ll even take you out for ice cream after. Promise.”

 

“You don’t even like Yunjin, anyway,” Sakura points out. “Which isn’t her fault, by the way. You shouldn’t blame her for an ugly douche being a by breaking up with you for her. The fact that he’s in the play, too? Are you, like some sort of sadist–Actually, don’t answer that. I don’t wanna know.”

 

Chaewon scoffs. “It’s not that. My dislike for her is no different from the fact that I dislike everyone. It’s just that she happens to have… more of a reason.”

 

She did have a point. It’s rare for Chaewon to say something nice about someone. She’s pretty set on how she feels about the whole Yunjin-taking-her-man situation, and Sakura can’t seem to change it. At least, she’s supportive of her crush. Even if that did come with some pretty obvious intention.  “Whatever. Let’s just watch this stupid thing and go home.”

 

“Not before I get what I came here for.”

 

Oh, God. Sakura raises a brow. This couldn’t be good. “I’m scared to ask.”

 

Chaewon looks from side to side as if she’s cautious of who’s around, and Sakura would be confused if it weren’t for the fact that she’s not surprised Chaewon had something up her sleeve. A devious smile graces her features as she shows Sakura the inside of her bag, which contained a concerning lack of her usual items and an abundance of… tomatoes? 

 

“Jesus, Chaewon,” Sakura rolls her eyes, although still in disbelief. “Seriously? I think you’ve been watching too many old movies.”

 

“What can I say? I’m a er for classic comedy,” Chaewon giggles. 

 

“You better have brought those as a snack, or you’re going to get us in trouble. Again. I’m lucky I’m still on track to graduate this year.” Sakura hisses, voice lowered to a whisper.

 

“Relax! It’s only if we need it, which we probably won’t,” Chaewon reassures, which unfortunately works well on her end when she pairs such words with such a sweet, honest look. She links arms with Sakura, smiling gently at her. (Which admittedly, pisses Sakura off just a bit.) “Now come on, I wanna get good seats.”

 

Sakura rolls her eyes yet again but follows Chaewon into the theater anyway. “You stole those from my garden, didn’t you?”

 

“Well, yes, but–”

 

“Hi, guys!” 

 

A familiar voice cuts into their conversation from behind as they reach the lobby, and while Sakura doesn’t have much of an opinion at all on the young woman who’d called out to them, Chaewon very clearly makes a face of disgust before turning around and making no effort to change it.

 

“Hi, Kazuha,” Chaewon greets back through gritted teeth. 

 

Nakamura Kazuha lived across the street from Chaewon and Sakura and has been since her arrival from Europe five years ago. A professional ballerina who Chaewon considers her number one rival, simply due to the fact that she had stolen some of her popularity (and crushes, and school awards) throughout the years. (Which may or may not have contributed to, what Sakura likes to call, ‘internalized misogyny problems’.) She’s admittedly, not the brightest crayon in the box. Sakura thinks, it’s only a matter of time before someone so naive and lacks common sense meets her downfall. (Honestly, probably at the hands of her best friend.) But, she’s kind, sweet, and generous to everyone she meets. Chaewon swears on her life that it’s only a persona to prey on the weak, and while Sakura doesn’t believe an ounce of that, she tries to remain civil when in the presence of the two. After all, even though Chaewon is her best friend, Kazuha had never given Sakura a reason to dislike her. She was quite nice, albeit, simply exists. 

 

“Are you guys here to watch the show, too?”

 

Chaewon scoffs. “No, we’re here to pick a fistfight with the drama professor. Sakura’s been practicing her shadow-clone jutsu.”

 

Sakura nudges Chaewon to be polite, but Kazuha nods as if it were a perfectly good answer. “Oh… wait? That’s, like, kind of cool. And kind of a shame.”

 

“A shame? Why?” Sakura asks, slightly amused. 

 

“Well, a little one happened to be by herself outside my house so…” Kazuha turns around and signals for a rather tall figure standing at the concession stand to join the conversation, and almost immediately when Chaewon registers who it was as a giant young girl approaches stuffing her face with popcorn does her face twist in anger.

 

“What the–Hong Eunchae!” Chaewon growls, stepping towards the girl. “What the are you doing here? I told you to stay at home!”

 

“You took my key,” Eunchae says through a mouthful of popcorn. “I told you I would be back from Haerin’s house in fifteen minutes but by the time I got home you were already gone, and my mom told me to go to Kazuha’s house, and I told her what happened so we took an Uber here, so…”

 

Hong Eunchae was Chaewon’s younger teenage cousin. She’s often left in Chaewon’s care whenever Eunchae’s mother is out for work. Which was quite often, considering the Hongs' status as one of South Korea’s top business families. Sakura had often joined in the babysitting, and the duo had been watching the girl since she was in kindergarten. Frankly, Sakura doesn’t quite understand the way a rich kid’s mind works. Nor does she understand how the girl had gotten to tower over them at a whopping 170cm at the age of sixteen. But, she generally enjoys Eunchae’s presence. If anything, she’s a reminder to Chaewon to tone down the… intensity of her personality and act like an adult.

 

“You should have let her know, that’s a bit irresponsible…” Kazuha mindlessly, yet innocently mutters.

 

Sakura scoffs. “Yeah, so irresponsible, Chaewon.”

 

“Shut up,” Chaewon hisses before grabbing a hold of Eunchae’s arm and dragging her towards the direction of the front door. “Come on, I’m taking you to your mom’s. This is ridiculous. I told her!”

 

“Wah, my popcorn!” Eunchae’s cry is heard before the door closes and a trail of popcorn is all that’s left.

 

Sakura watches in amusement. Her arms cross, and at the very least, she doesn’t have to worry about the possibility of going to jail, or having to bail Chaewon out of jail. She’s sure one of those things were to happen in the future. She just wishes she could hold off on it until after she graduates, at least.

 

“I should go with them. But, you enjoy the show! Tell me how it goes!” Kazuha interjects, but before Sakura can even say anything, specifically how it’s a bad idea when it’s clear as day that Chaewon would rather eat her own vomit than spend time with both Eunchae and Kazuha on a Friday night, the ballerina’s already practically floating out the door. 

 

Well, this definitely wasn’t how she expected her night to go. Being in a theater full of people she knows are also here to see Yunjin and her boyfriend while she’s following the crowd yet having absolutely nothing else in common with them was not how she wanted to spend her Friday night. She would much rather dive into the sanctuary that was her group of internet friends, which Chaewon relentlessly makes fun of her for. Especially the comfort of one particular person.

 

Sakura sits down on a bench outside and pulls out her phone, immediately seeing a name pop up that makes her smile before she reads the message upon it from an hour ago. 

 

tummyhurts: maki ;_; did i ever tell u that i hate men? comfort me pls

 

A user on twitter called “tummyhurts” who goes by the name Janice, someone she’s had some sort of homo online friendship with for years. She only knows her name, her age, and the fact that she shares the same interests and time zones as her. But, for all Janice knows, Sakura conceals her identity and calls herself ‘Maki’. Despite this, and the fact that she knows virtually nothing about Janice or what she even looks like, the conversations she stays up late at night and throughout the day with her is enough to make her heart flutter in the way she wished Yunjin would. And it’s enough, for her. For now. 

 

She’d kept it a secret from Chaewon until recently. (Sakura’s online presence wasn’t exactly discreet, and Chaewon is surprisingly good at detective work.) But, while Chaewon is supportive of Sakura finding romance with someone, she’s decided to push her even further in Yunjin’s direction. She’s almost positive that it’s for the sake of getting her away from her ex-boyfriend.

 

But, it’s different. With Janice, it’s different.

 

It’s… complicated.

 

reneesgf: slr, got dragged out of the house by my friend >_> but uh oh what happened now

 

Just as she presses send, the door swings open with great force and the familiar scent of a sweet, gentle perfume wafts by Sakura as a red-headed figure storms out, makeup smudged from obvious tears, and being followed after by the last man on Earth Sakura wanted to see. Its Yunjin and her boyfriend.

 

“Babe, wait,” The young man calls out. “It wasn’t what it looked like. I swear, she was the one that came on to me! What am I supposed to say, no?”

 

“That’s exactly what you’re supposed to say!” Yunjin cried back. “God, you ing . This is, what, the fifth time? And with Ms. Lee? Isn’t she married?!” 

 

“My hand–just–accidentally went to her ! It’s human nature! I have mommy issues, you know that!”

 

“What kind of excuse is that? Are you twelve?”

 

“No? I’m twenty, babe. I thought you knew that—“

 

“It was a rhetorical question, you idiot!”

 

“What the does that even mean?!”

 

“God, how did you manage to graduate high school let alone get into university?”

 

“...To be honest, my dad–”

 

“God dammit, that was another rhetorical question!”

 

Well, this was awkward. Sakura watches the lover’s quarrel with wide eyes. Knowing that the guy practically had had the same ty fights with Chaewon, she isn’t exactly surprised that Yunjin ran into the same problems with him. She’s just surprised it was far less than what Chaewon experienced. She starts to feel anxiety build up in her chest, and she’s sure it’s because the two were arguing so loud that it just started to jumble into incoherent yelling, but also because she hates seeing someone like Yunjin be thrown around by such a guy.

 

Sakura opens to speak, feeling like she should say something, anything to stop this considering the show was about to start, and she’s seconds away from calling an Uber to take her home anyway. “I–”

 

“You can’t tell me what to do,” Yunjin angrily shouts, walking away from her boyfriend. “I only did this stupid play because you wanted me to. And of course, it’s to the ing drama professor. you! And you know what?! I’m leaving!” 

 

“What? And where do you think you’re going? I literally drove you here, babe.”

 

What happens next, Sakura certainly doesn’t expect. The red-headed actress makes aggressive strides towards her, and clasps her fingers against the Japanese’s wrist, pulling her up. “Sorry, we’re leaving.”

 

Sakura blinks, stumbling as she stands. “Huh, what–”

 

“Right, Sakura?” Yunjin looks her straight in the eyes, which seems to be pleading with her. But, she can barely focus. She just said her name. “Now, move, asswipe.”

 

“Babe, no. Let’s talk, come on. You’re being really mean.” He steps forward, attempting to hold Yunjin’s hand, but she’s quick to swipe it away. 

 

“Uh, asswipe, she said move,” Sakura mutters, definitely not as confident as she had intended.

 

“Shut up, I do not talk to ugly girls, I thought I told your weird that,” he argues without looking at Sakura—classic for him to treat her as if she was an object he didn’t like. At least, he remembered her this time.

 

“Oh, off,” Yunjin rolls her eyes. 

 

Everything happens so quickly that Sakura isn’t sure if time feels like it slowed down or sped up. Either way, she finds herself being dragged back inside to the girls bathroom and as confused as she is, her wrist tingles from the way Yunjin holds onto her and her brain feels squished from the way she even remembered her ing name after they’ve barely spoken to each other in the years they’ve known each other. Was this real? Or some sort of dream? If it was, it had to be a prank, right? Where were the cameras?

 

Yunjin locks the door behind them, sure that someone of his nature would try to enter the girls bathroom and force his way into a conversation. But, it still makes Sakura’s heart race even faster. The single-person restroom is already tiny enough, but being locked in with the girl of her dreams makes the room feel like its closing in on her. Yeah, there was no way this was real life. Pretty soon she’s going to wake up to her cat’s paw smacking her on the forehead.

 

As Yunjin releases a sigh that’s clearly from the stress of whatever she’s going through, Sakura tries her best not to stare at her. Although, it clearly fails when the other girl looks up at her.

 

“Um, sorry,” Yunjin says. “I wasn’t thinking, I just wanted to, like, get out of that situation, I guess. Sorry.”

 

“Huh? No, no. No… it’s okay. I, uh… would have done the same thing.” It’s clearly a lie, but thankfully, she’s been considered a good liar. “Are… you okay?”

 

“Yeah,” Yunjin nods, slurring the word as if it were unfamiliar on her tongue and her eyebrows furrow. “...No, not really. He keeps doing like this to me and it’s just, so… ugh.”

 

“It is, ugh.” Sakura agrees awkwardly, fiddling with the ends of her shirt. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

 

Yunjin pauses. If it were Chaewon, she would say no, yet continue to ramble on anyway. It seems Yunjin had skipped the first part. “He’s a nice guy. He really is, somewhere deep down there.” she starts off, pressing her back against the door and sniffing through her tears. “But, he thinks with his all the time. It’s guys like him who are, like, rotted by . I swear, he’ll anything and anyone. What’s the point in even being in a relationship with me if that’s the case? Wouldn’t it be much easier to not be so you can who you want?” she pauses. “He’s just using me to make himself look good.”

 

“Doesn’t sound like a very nice guy to me,” Sakura says with a shrug. “Why are you with him? You said this was the fifth time?”

 

She swears that she sees Yunjin’s ears turn red. “O-Oh, you heard that? Yeah… fifth or sixth. I think I stopped keeping count.” she replies with a sad smile. “To be honest, I would have been done with him after the first time. I’m not someone who normally takes like that. But… I’m not so great either, ‘cause I have to admit I’m probably the one using him more than he is.”

 

Sakura tilts her head. “What do you mean?”

 

The actress bites down on her lower lip before speaking. “My parents really like him. Especially my mom.”

 

Sakura blinks. “Well, that’s more reasonable than Chaewon. She said the same thing about him.”

 

“Kim Chaewon?” Yunjin asks, and somehow, the way her name comes off her tongue feels a little odd. Like it holds history, and Sakura knows it does. But, she had no idea how Yunjin felt about their situation. 

 

“Yeah,” she says. “She’s, like, totally over him. But, honestly, I think she was just hypnotized by the fact that… like you said, he thinks with his .” Her face twists in disgust, and Yunjin laughs. “Do you think it’s really worth it to keep letting him walk all over you for the sake of your parents? Like… do your parents know about these, er, five-slash-six times?”

 

“You know, I’m not sure,” Yunjin shrugs. “Either way, I don’t think they’d care, I mean… all that matters to them is that I’m dating some rich soccer player like him. All about appearances, you know.”

 

Sakura can’t help but pity the girl. She can’t even fathom what it’s like to have your love life dictated by your parents, which she knows she’s privileged in that sense especially considering her circumstances. But, to think that Yunjin was going through something like this is another reminder that she really doesn’t know her at all. And God, does she want to. She wishes she could take away the pain of all the stupid boys that broke her heart, that she could show her the respect and kindness that she deserved. If there was one thing about Yunjin that she did know, it was that she shows nothing but sweetness and genuinity to those around her, no matter who they were, where they came from, what they looked like, or what their circumstances were. It was time she received the same. 

 

“I don’t know, I think… you deserve to be with someone that you really like,” Sakura replies thoughtfully. “I mean, I wouldn’t really know, I’ve never even been with anyone before. But, I at least know that much. I think you deserve to, you know, be happy.” 

 

Yunjin looks up at her, and her smile doesn’t seem so sad anymore. “Thanks, Sakura.” she says softly. “That means a lot.”

 

Sakura smiles back. Their first conversation in forever and although it came from a strange beginning, she feels she has to thank the universe for giving her this opportunity. It feels more hopeful than she ever thought it would. “You’re supposed to be a princess, right? Pretty sure you can’t go out there looking like a panda.”

 

Yunjin chuckles softly. “God, sorry. I must look so ugly right now.”

 

Sakura shakes her head. “What? No. Um… never.” She mentally curses at herself for not taking the opportunity to flirt just a little better than that. “Do you mind if I help you? I might not look like it, but I’m pretty good with fixing post-crying makeup.” The amount of times she had to fix Chaewon’s was more than enough to keep track of.

 

Yunjin nods, and Sakura takes the paper towels beside her. “You’re a lifesaver, Sakura.”

 

As Sakura leans in, she realizes she had never actually made physical contact with Yunjin except for the one time she accidentally tripped in front of her in 8th grade and being yanked from the bench outside the theater to the bathroom. She can smell her more clearly, feel the warmth radiating from her skin from how close she actually is to her, and God, does she look even prettier up close, even with her makeup a hot mess. At this point, Sakura’s sure there’s nothing in the world Yunjin could do to make herself look ugly in the slightest. She tries her best to fix the mess, although, finds it hard to focus. “Sorry if it hurts. We make do with what we have.”

 

Yunjin chuckles again.  “No, it’s okay. How do I look?”

 

After a few moments, Sakura pulls back and tilts her head to observe Yunjin. If she’s honest, she’d taken a majority of her makeup off, but it’s far better to start from scratch than what she had on. It’s the first time since elementary school had she seen her bare face, it feels… special. “Perfect.”

 

Too perfect for her own good. 

 

“Hey, um,” Sakura starts. “How, um, did you know my name?”

 

Yunjin looks at her, confused, with a tilt of her head. “Well, I’ve known you forever. We’re friends, right?”

 

What?

We are?

 

She can feel her own face warm up, and she’s sure it’s clear as day that such a sentiment makes her blush. If she’s honest, it doesn’t make much sense. The last time Yunjin had spoken to her was to tell her ‘bless you’ when she sneezed during class. And that was more than a couple of weeks ago. To consider them friends was definitely a stretch. But, Sakura was more of a hopeless romantic than she’d ever like to admit. She’s taking in this dream as much as she can.

 

“You think that we’re–”

 

“Kkura, I know you’re in there!”

 

The familiar voice shouts from behind the door, followed by a series of incredibly loud bangs that were enough to make Yunjin shake. Her immediate bodily response is to tense up. She knows that when Chaewon uses a certain tone like she had just used, it’s absolutely serious. 

 

She shares a look of panic with Yunjin before the taller girl moves over to let her open the door, Chaewon shoving her way inside. 

 

“Kkura, my ex and Yunjin’s boyfriend is, like, going crazy outside. He’s like sobbing on the ground and he even tried to punch the wall and–Wait…” Chaewon’s look of panic is slowly replaced by a look of intrigue when she looks back and forth at the two women before her, a playful smile curving on her lips as there’s a very clear assumption being made. “Was I… interrupting something? Oh my god, Kkura, did you–”

 

“No! No, Yunjin was just–” 

 

“Yunjin, please!” A male voice croaks out from the hallway.

 

The redhead groans. “Jesus. Sorry, I have to take care of this.” she explains before leaving. 

 

Sakura isn’t quite sure what to feel. If anything, she’s more confused than she’s ever been in her life. The past hour in itself felt like it could have all been avoided if she never picked up Chaewon’s phone call, or even if she simply went with her to drop Eunchae off. “What are you doing here? Where’s Eunchae?”

 

“Her mom told me to just bring her so we came back and saw him making a scene. I didn’t want her to get involved so she’s in the car with Kazuha–”

 

“Hi, guys!”

 

The way the voice greets them sounds the same every single time and it tells the pair of friends exactly who’s entered the bathroom. It was unexpected who’s behind her, though, holding onto her sleeve.

 

“ing–Kazuha, what are you doing? Why did you bring Eunchae? I told you to wait in the car!” Chaewon hisses.

 

Kazuha blinks. “Well, I thought it would be bad if I left her in the car and I was worried about you so I brought her with me.”

 

“Hi.” Eunchae says with a nod, and Chaewon sighs in frustration. 

 

“Whatever. Let’s all get out of here–”

 

“Wait,” Sakura stops the other three from leaving by raising her hand, stepping towards the door and pressing her ear against the surface. She can very clearly hear the voices behind them, arguing and shouting and, honestly, it sounds no different from what she normally hears as she passes by the drama department on a daily basis. But, what was different was hearing the sound of crying. Not the fake-crying that sounds suggestive depending on who it was. Real tears. And mean words trying to conceal it.

 

“God, can you just shut up?!” The male voice yells. “Seriously, Yunjin. I wouldn’t have even thought to do this if you weren’t so annoying all the time about . You think I really give a ? I’m just going along with this because I have to. You’re ing exhausting to be around, so sue me for needing a break.”

 

At that moment, Miyawaki Sakura was sure that there was no one worse on Earth than Huh Yunjin’s boyfriend. 

 

Despite her best friend always being caught in the center of feuds and problematic behavior, Sakura did her best to stay out of such as much as she could. She hated drama, she hated confrontation, she hated being involved in other people’s personal problems, especially when it came to stuck up s like the man she hears screaming. She could have stayed in the bathroom until things died down, and went home with Chaewon, forget about the world and sink into a video game until Monday came around. She should have done that. Everything in her tells her to follow through with her peace and not get involved.

 

But, there’s something inside her that snaps the moment she hears a choked apology from Yunjin. Something she doesn’t recognize, but she’s far too deep too quickly to deal with her own morals before she speaks again. “Chaewon,” she calls out. “You still got my tomatoes in that bag?”

 

“Um, yeah. But–Hey!” 

Without another word, Sakura grabs the bag from her best friend and storms out the door. She ignores the sound of chatter outside, she ignores Chaewon calling out her name in threes, she ignores Kazuha’s questions coming at her like rapid-fire, she ignores all the thoughts in her head that are holding her back and the devil on her shoulder only speaks louder to her when she sees Yunjin cry. 

 

Suddenly, she’s a young child again, sitting on the swingset with another young girl beside her. Tears fall down the young Sakura’s cheeks, and the girl with her she now knows as Huh Yunjin smiles as she hands her a tissue, tells her she scolded the group of kids who made Sakura cry, and not to worry, because Yunjin would protect her.

 

Its a core memory to her, and it matters the most right now.

 

“Hey.” Sakura calls out, voice low and deep and it honestly even scares herself.

 

The male looks up at her in annoyance. “Look, stay out of this, nerd. I don’t need your–”

 

Before he can finish his sentence, which Sakura knows was going to drag on until it became some homophobic statement like it always does when he speaks to her, the smaller girl digs into Chaewon’s bag and throws a tomato in his direction, a perfect shot as it smacks him right in the head. Red liquid splashes everywhere almost as if it were some brutal massacre, and the room falls silent from shock. 

 

Oh . 

 

Sakura takes a deep breath when he looks at her. 

 

“Oh, you’re ing dea—”

 

She didn't even realize it, but she had dug her hand back into the bag and thrown another perfect tomato bullet at the male’s chest, the impact causing him to fall to the ground. 

 

Another deep breath. She could keep going until the guy is coated in tomato pieces and juice enough to feed an entire family. Her mind starts to go blank, and she reaches out for yet another one before hands grab at her from behind.

 

“Kkura, kkura, stop. Stop.” Chaewon’s voice brings her back, along with Kazuha’s, and before she knows it, she’s dragged out of the theater’s lobby as all eyes are on her. Her eyes meet Yunjin’s briefly, and the way she looks at her causes her heart to sink within her chest. She definitely just did the wrong thing, and , Yunjin is never going to look her way again. 

 

But, to her surprise, Yunjin doesn’t aid her boyfriend. She walks the other direction.

 

Sakura doesn’t even have time to react before the trio that had emerged from the bathroom are pulling her into the parking lot, then to the safety of Chaewon’s car. Chaos arises all around them, but the mere thought of what she had just done causes Sakura to feel as if her body is not her own. She simply sits in the car, staring straight ahead with not a thought behind her eyes aside from the memory of what had just happened replaying over and over like a broken record. 

 

After a few minutes of disassociation, Sakura finds herself in the passenger’s seat of Chaewon’s car, with a silent Kazuha and Eunchae in the backseat, and Chaewon recklessly driving down the road with 80’s music playing on the radio.

 

“Holy ,” Sakura presses a hand against her forehead. “I’m a goddamn murderer.” 

 

“Oh, so now you talk?” Chaewon exclaims. “Jesus, did you get ing possessed in the ten minutes I was gone?”

 

“Probably,” Sakura mutters. “Holy .”

 

“Oh, my uncle is a pastor. Maybe he can help you.” Kazuha chimes in. 

 

“Shut up, Kazuha,” Chaewon shouts. “Not gonna lie, though. That was badass as hell! I didn’t know you had it in you to do something like that! Hell, I wasn’t really even going to do anything with those.”

 

“I’m a murderer,” Sakura repeats.

 

“Did you see the look on his face? He was totally—“

 

“Dead. I murdered him. Oh my god.”

 

“What? Sakura, they were tomatoes.”

 

“Murderous tomatoes.”

 

“Uh, I hate to interrupt, but,” Eunchae calls out. “I take it the show is off the table so can we stop circling the house and go inside?”

 

“Oh,” Chaewon slows down. “Sorry.”

 

-

 

The weekend flies by before Sakura knows it. She collected her Nintendo switch and camped in her room for a remainder of the weekend, shut off her phone and refused to merely look at any device she could be reached. She hadn’t let anyone in except for Chaewon, who she mostly responded to in incoherent grunts and sluggish head movements. After all, she never left her alone. There’s no way she could after what had happened. 

 

The scene ruminates in her head no matter how hard Sakura tries to push it out. Knowing him, he would make it his mission to make her life a living hell and probably involve both Chaewon and Yunjin against her. The social suicide, the taunts, the harassment, she could take. (At least she tells herself that. She’s played League of Legends for years.) But the very thought that her best friend and her decade-long crush would both hate her was the last thing Sakura ever wanted to happen. 

 

She finally gets the courage to leave her room after Monday morning comes around. (Not like she had much of a choice, considering she had morning classes that day.) and she’s thankful that Chaewon was in her kitchen when she walks in, stealing her food as she always does with the television on. It seemed like the start to any other day.

 

“Jesus, you smell like . Go take a bath—“

 

“Chaewon,” Sakura sits beside her, looking at her friend with sad eyes. “You don’t hate me, right?”

 

“What?” Chaewon scoffs, looking as if Sakura had told her she was from outer space. “The hell are you talking about?”

 

“What I did on Friday,” she mutters. “The tomato thing.”

 

“Kkura, why would I hate you for that?” Chaewon asks. “I literally love you even more. I didn’t even think that was possible. You’re, like, my hero. My lesbian Batman.”

 

Sakura pauses, then scoffs. “You can’t pick anything cooler? Lesbian spiderman, perhaps?”

 

“Does that make me lesbian Iron Man?” 

 

“...I think that would just be Iron Man. You’re not a lesbian.”

 

“But, if I were connected to you, then I would be, like, in the lesbian marvelverse. The straight sidekick. Is Iron Man a sidekick? – Actually, I don’t know superheroes,” Chaewon sighs. “Anyway, If you’re worried, you have no reason to be. Everything is fine.”

 

Somehow, she trusts Chaewon. If things weren’t fine, she would have pulled another odd attention-seeking scheme up her sleeve and thrown it in her face until she agreed. But, she’s… oddly calm. 

 

“I guess, but—what if something happens to me? You know him.”

 

“Trust me, Kkura. That won’t happen.”

 

Sakura turns on her phone for the first time in three days and she doesn’t notice Chaewon is watching her with great, suspicious intent. It was difficult, considering her entire life revolves around internet security and media. But, at the same time, her mind was far too deep in its anxiety to worry about that part of her. Again, she trusts Chaewon. Which she feels she might regret. 

 

The numbers that display the time are first to show up. Everything appears normal, and she’s sure her friends would question her absence. 

 

But just as she’s about to reach them, the rest of her notifications for her messages load. 

 

i know we haven’t talked in a while but are you seriously starting a girls fight club? that’s amazing, id love to join!

 

hey im in your english class, it’s so cool what you did to that douchebag on the soccer team!!! where can i sign up for that club you’re starting?

 

miyawaki sakura since when were u so tough omg, please teach me ur ways!!! i literally need this

 

details on the upcoming girls fight club?

 

hey where’s the fight club meeting going to be? 

 

Those were just a few of the many she sees from different platforms, all worded differently but within the same vein. 

 

Yup, there was the regret. 

 

She looks up at her best friend. 

 

“Kim Chaewon,” she grunts. “What did you do?”

 

The girl smiles deviously at her. 

 

Turns out, Sakura’s the dead one.