Donghae’s POV

I woke up that morning with a horrible headache. I was busy drinking last night and now I had to face the consequences the next morning. The other members must be shocked after they found out that Donghae, a Super Junior member that doesn’t drink caused a chaos in restaurant because he got drunk. My right hand was holding my head, trying hard to bear the pain as I tried to recall on what happened last night.

Oh yeah, I got drunk because of Yoona.

~Flashback~

I was leaning on the chair, with arms crossed my chest and tried hard to put a smile on my face. It was Snsd’s party and I had to act normal although my heart was twisting inside of me that moment. I couldn’t make it obvious, of course, or else what other people would say if they saw me in depression while partying?

No, that’s not normal.

Leeteuk-hyung was talking to Jessica, and it seemed like he was telling her a lame joke because Jessica was giving a cold look, warning him to stop. Perhaps that was one of the reason why Heechul-hyung and Jessica are good friends, I guess? The cold twins, Heesica. I chuckled looking at them and turned to where I was staring, the floor.

Other people were eating, drinking and only I couldn’t eat a single bite of mine. I was busy doing something else, having deep thoughts. Everyone was so happy, enjoying themselves, but me? I felt there was a lacking inside of me.

 Happy means nothing when the other members are not around.

When Hyukkie’s not around.

I sighed. Maybe the other members were right, I depend on Hyukjae too much and without his presence, I felt something’s missing. Something important.

~~~~~~~~~

I was almost midnight and it seemed like the party would never come to an end. I was still sitting on the chair, praying that Leeteuk-hyung would announce that we would leave soon, so that I could go back and sleep! Although I did nothing and just sat on a chair, pretending I was happy, I was exhausted.

Who knew doing nothing while putting a fake smile could be so tiring? Well, at least nobody noticed how different I was because they were having a good time. I smiled to myself, Lee Donghae, you’re such a great actor!

“Oppa, you are so different today. Why?” a soft, female voice came out of nowhere.

I took a glance to where that voice came from and it was Yoona. She was standing beside me, holding a bottle of Soju.

“I’m busted.”I mumbled to myself while dragging my eyes away from her.

“Huh?” she frowned and slided to the seat beside me.

“Nothing. What are you saying? I’m just being me. Can’t you see that I’m enjoying myself right now?” I said, smilling and tried to give her a convincing look, but I failed.

She narrowed her eyes and crossed her legs. Here comes the serious Yoona.

“Oppa, you are smiling on the outside but hurting on the inside. Although I’m younger than you but that doesn’t mean that I’m stupid, you know.” she uttered and smiled devilishly, which reminded me to someone. Guess who?

 How did she see the insides of me? Even me, I didn’t even sure what my heart felt and yet, she, who just a friend of mine knew that I was hurt.

“What’s bothering you?” she asked with a worried look and put the bottle she was holding on the table. “You can tell me.”

Tell her that I’m confused with my own feelings? She’s my friend. One of my closest friend and I wanted to tell her, spilling my hearts out but no, I couldn’t. I didn’t want my problems to be a burden to her.

“Nothing.” I murmured and kept my head down.

“It’s okay if don’t want to tell me,”she smiled at reached for her bottle before handling it over to me. “Drink up.”

“You know I’m not the type that really drink--” I paused and looked up to see her when she  interrupted my words, with a low voice.

“A friend of mine told me once.”she mumbled and placed the bottle down, back on the table.

“ I was having problems back then and I couldn’t help myself but cried all day long. He was willing to share my problems and I couldn’t tell him. While he was handling over a bottle of Soju to me, he said, ‘Drink up,’ and he smiled. ‘If you can’t spill your hearts out, then the only thing to do is to get drunk. It’s not the best solution, but it will make you forget about your problems for awhile.’ I looked up to him and he chuckled.”

‘What’s with the tears? Kids cry when they are sad, but not adults, okay? Big girls don’t cry,’he said and wiped my tears away gently.” She uttered while staring at the table with a serious look and I could sense it wasn’t a pleasant memory.

I was staring at her, fully concentrated hearing her story. She was never that serious. The Yoona I know is a bright and bubbly Yoona, not a serious Yoona.

“Are you telling me your love story cause I’ m not really interested in hearing one right know,” I jokingly said and it served me right for saying that, I got a slap on my arm.

“Im’ trying to cheer you up!”she yelled and her eyes were wide open, staring at me in disbelief.

“I know.”I uttered while massaging my arm which suffered from pain from the loud slap that she just did. That moment, I realised that I should never try to get on Yoona’s nerve and never underestimate girl power. The nickname Him(Strong) Yoona fits her perfectly.

 “And, thank you.” I smiled. “For trying to cheer me up,”I added and she just nodded.

I grabbed the bottle and without thinking any further, I drank up to what’s left in thebottle and finished it off in one shot. I haven’t felt happy for some time so what should I care about it now?

At least, it will make me forget about my problems for awhile.

At least, I will forget about Hyukjae for a moment.

I finaly laugh that night, and it all thanks to Yoona. She accompanied me all night and she  didn’t even walked away from me because she worried that I might get lonely. I could see she was trying hard to make me smile and I was glad she did that.

Snsd’s manager voice, telling them it’s time for them to left stopped my conversation with Yoona.

As they were waving goodbye and headed out from the restaurant, I couldn’t help myself from staring at bottles of Soju on the table. I have heard that some people said, for those who isn’t used to drinking, a little bit of alcohol make you drunk, but a huge amount of it can drive you  crazy.

Should I do this?

“If you can’t spill your hearts out, then the only thing to do is to get drunk.”

Before I knew it, I already lost control of myself and drank the whole bottle while fresh tears welled up in my eyes, spilling over my cheeks.

~End Of Flashback~

I took a glance on my watch. Crap.

I got out of the bed and crept to the bathroom, washed quickly and flung on a pair of jeans and a white-coloured, long-sleeved sweater before headed off to down the 11^th  floor where members gathered to have breakfast. If I’m quick enough, then I might get the chance to catch up to them.

The dorm was in complete silence as I pushed the elevator’s button and waited patiently. There was no sign of people so I guess that the other members must have left early for their schedules.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Owh, you are all here?” I asked as I entered the dorm and saw the Shindong-hyung and Ryeowook sitting on the couch. “The rest of the members are here except for Yesung-hyung and Sungmin-hyung. They left early for their schedules. Leeteuk, Heechul and Eunhyuk-hyung are in the kitchen, having breakfast.” Ryewook said and I just smiled.

As soon as I reached the kitchen, my eyes landed on the first person I always greet every morning I get up from bed.

“Hyukkie~” I walked to Hyukjae who was busy eating and didn’t even realize my existence, and gave him a backhug.

“Aish! You guys are hurting my eyes. Search for some other place if you wanna get ‘lovey-dovey’. Kitchen is not a suitable place so I suggest, you better get a room.” Heechul-hyung stared at us in disgusted look and smirked. The others were just trying hard to hold back their laughter, except for Hyukjae who just kept his head down with reddening cheeks, being shy.

“You didn’t even notice that I’m here when you’re eating. Yah, do you love food more than you love me?” I asked sternly and reached for a chair to sit beside him.

He turned to look at me but when our eyes met, he quickly looked away, avoiding my gaze.

 He didn’t have the guts look me in the eyes?

Eunhyuk’s POV

Aish! What is he doing? I was still shocked with his unexpected confession last night and now he’s asking me if I love food more than I love him. Okay, he was too drunk last night, and maybe he forgot that he confessed. Hugh, what a relief.

“Why are you quiet all of the sudden? I thought you are going to tell us what happened to you last night.” I heard Leeteuk-hyung asked, and then I realized he was asking me when I saw everybody was staring at me, waiting for a reply.

“Uh—um..that..” I flustered, trying hard to think of a proper answer and of course, I couldn’t tell them that Donghae confessed to me! I was planning on telling them and thought it would be a secret just among us. But then Donghae came out of nowhere and he seemed like he didn’t remember what he did.

 I thought that it’s better that way because what you don’t know, doesn’t hurt you, right?

“I--I had a bad dream last night.” I finally uttered and they sighed.

“Bad dream? You’re acting way to much, Hyukjae. I thought you’re going to tell us something important,” Heechul-hyung teased and let out a chuckle.

“Yeah. I thought you’re going to tell us about something or SOMEONE..” Kyuhyun mumbled and stared at me, emphasizing the word someone. I glared at him with a puzzled look.

Huh? What is he up to?

I gave up on the magnae and continued eating my breakfast, ignoring him.

“I don’t know..something like a confession?” he whispered and I swore, I almost got chocked when I heard his words. I turned to look at everyone, hoping that they didn’t hear what Kyuhyun just said and God was on my side that day, nobody heard.

Leeteuk-hyung and Heechul-hyung was chattering and Donghae was eating while concentrating on their conversation. Kyuhyun was just leaning back on his chair, with a smirk on his face. Big letters of the word ‘satisfaction’ were visibly written on his face.

Is torturing me that fun?

But the real question is, how did knew about that?

I stood up and left the table without a word, heading to my room. I laid on my bed flat, closing my eyes with my face buried onto my palms. These things gave me a headache! First, Donghae confessed his love to me, then Kyuhyun. I mean, I thought he was like a mind reader but now I’m suspecting he’s a spy. Although it sounds ridiculous but that would explain on how he knew everything that involes me and Donghae, the promise and now this! Oh God I’m getting insane!

I’m already confuse with my own feelings and trust me, if this kind of things keep showing up, I might ended up being crazy.

“Hyukkie, are you okay?” I heard a small voice asking me and that voice sounded worried.

I opened my eyes and saw Donghae slowly approached me. He sat next to me on my bed and I got up to to face him.

“Yeah. I’m fine.” I looked at him, trying my best to act normal.

“That’s good to hear,” he grinned at me and a flock of butterflies started flattering inside of me.Why am I being so nervous? No, Lee Hyukjae calm down. You’re being this way because of some stupid confession that he didn’t even remember he did.

And again, if I already knew that it’s stupid, then why am I blushing?

There was a pause, a long empty moment when neither of us knew what to say.

“So..” he said, trying to start a conversation.

“About the thing I said..” he continued and stared at me, expecting some reaction from me but I just remained seated, clueless on what was he talking about.

“What thing?” I frowned.

“Did you forget that I confessed last night?” he asked bluntly.

“I was the one who got drunk and yet, I still remember what I did last night. Seriously Hyukjae, you need to find yourself a doctor because you might suffer from short-term memory lost,” he said with a calmed voice, while pointing his finger at my head.

I was holding myself together, as the slightest knock might make me crumble. So he already knew it all along!?

“Uh, that. I didn’t forget about that one,” I mumbled.

Yeah, how could I even forget?

“It’s..well..you should understand..I” he looked flustered and I guess he felt guilty for saying that.

“Don’t worry, Hae.” I said before continued, “You were drunk back then, I totally understand. I didn’t take what you said seriously.” I uttered, with my eyes glued on the floor. Instantly, I felt like a traitor. I should feel relieved knowing that he didn’t mean to say but, what is this feeling?

My heart flooded with a mixture of anger, sadness and disappointment and somehow, I felt betrayed. What I said was completely the opposite of what I was feeling. I wasn’t sure about how I felt but one thing’s for sure, it hurts a lot.

“But I want you to take it seriously, Hyukkie,” I heard Donghae said and I tilted my head to see him.

Did my ears deceive me or he just said that he actually wanted me to take his words seriously?

“What?” I raised my eyebrows, making sure that I heard it right.

“I said, I want you to take it seriously, Hyukkie,” he repeated but this time he faced me with a serious look. His eyes shined and I guess, it was telling me that he wasn’t joking.

“I..” he paused when we heard Leeteuk-hyung’s voice from out of the room, telling the other members, including us,  that we should get ready for our schedules. That was when Donghae stood up and headed out from my room before turned over his shoulder and said, “We’ll talk later.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eunhyuk’s POV

We finished our schedules quite late that day. As usual, we were exhausted and walked to our rooms to have a shower and sleep. Leeteuk-hyung was in my room while others were sleeping. We had a chat that night and when it was midnight, he decided to go back to his room to get some sleep. He almost screamed out of shock when he opened the door and saw a guy standing in front of the door. It was Donghae. He was wearing a monkey-printed pajama with a pillow in his hands, hugging them.

“Yah, Donghae! You startled me! I thought you were a ghost. It’s so late, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be sleeping in our dorm right now?” Leeteuk-hyung kept throwing question without giving Donghae the chance to answer it but Donghae’s attention was on somewhere else and he smiled when his eyes landed on me.

“I want to sleep here with you, Hyukkie,” he said softly and my eyes widened.

“Sleep? Here?” I asked him and I couldn’t find an excuse to make him stay away from me. He did mention that we would have a talk about the confession earlier but I didn’t think I that wanted to face him. I’m a coward for I was afraid of what he would say and that I couldn’t accept his words. I flashed him with a helpless, hopeless look, one that’s meant to say some other time okay? not here, not now.

Donghae just pouted while staring at me. One word, aegyo.

He always does that when he wants something from me and I fall into his trap everytime he does that. I couldn’t resist a cute pouting fish, could I?

“Fine.” I mumbled. I lost to a cute, powerful pouting fish.

His face lit up and a smile flickered across his lips. He rushed to my bed to sit beside me and Leeteuk-hyung just chuckled while observing his action.

“You can never get enough of Hyukjae, can’t you?” he teased and Donghae just acting shy, I guess, he covered his face with his pillow. Ugh, I hate it when he couldn’t control himself from doing aegyo when he knew that he managed to defeat me once again.

Leeteuk-hyung was on his way out of the room but then stopped and turned to Donghae and me, with a worried face.

“Donghae-yah, don’t do anything weird to Hyukjae, okay?” he uttered.

I knew it was meant to be a joke but then I got extremely worried when Donghae just looked at him, smilling and said,“We’ll see about that!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was already 15 minutes since Leeteuk-hyung left but neither Donghae nor me, uttered a word. What’s weider is the fact that why he just kept his mouth shut? He was the one who came here and I assumed that he had a lot to say to me, and yet, he just remained seated beside me, unmoving. Why is he doing this to me?

Is he being shy?

No. Lee Donghae is never shy when he’s with me. Impossible.

“Um..It’s late, we better go to sleep now.” I said, switching off the light while pulling out my blanket and turned my back on him. I didn’t want to waste my time, waiting for him to say something that I wasn’t even sure I wanted to hear.

Perhaps, he was just playing with my heart and I was the only one who took this matter seriously. Aish, stupid Hyukjae! Why didn’t I realize this sooner?

“O..Okay.” I heard him mumbled and laid down next me. We have to lay pretty close to each other since my bed is a single-bed but we were used to it. Donghae used to come to my room, and secretly crawl onto my bed, sleeping with me almost every night because he said that he didn’t like to be alone in the dark, even for a moment. Sometimes he acted like he was going to wake me up in my room, but later the other members found us, hugging and while we were sleeping.

We were that close. I mean, we used to be.

But then, everything changed. The thing we used to do, put us in an awkward situation and I hate myself for admitting this, but, I would love to have the old him back.

The annoying, and distracting Donghae, that I love.

“Hyukkie, we need to talk.” he whispered.

“Some other time. I want to sleep.” I said harshly.

“No. Now’s the perfect time. Please,” he pleaded and I turned my body around, to meet his eyes. We were so close, our faces just inches apart from each other.

“What?”

He took a deep breath and bit his lips.

“Remember the day when I made promise with you that I would spent more time with you? I’m sorry I didn’t keep up to that promise, I really am.” he uttered while staring at me, seeking for forgiveness.

“You said you wanted to be with me that night but then I left you, and went to Snsd’s party. I saw your reaction when Leeteuk-hyung mentioned Yoona’s name..” he sighed, before continued.

“When he said that you might get jealous of Yoona.” he uttered and I pulled my blanket closer, covering my chest. My heart was thumping like crazy. It was unbearable and made me placed my hand onto my chest, trying to calm it down, but of course, it was useless.

“Hyukie, don’t get jealous, okay? I probably have spent a lot of time with her lately, compared to you, but that doesn’t mean that I love her more than you,” he smiled and his cheeks flamed.

 I didn’t see this coming and I guess, he didn’t either. He was embarrassed by his own words and it’s rare to see that but, at this point, I’m liking what I’m seeing.

“You know how much I love you, right?” he grinned, hoping that I would give a positive respond. He stared at me with his beautiful eyes and made my heart thumped faster than it already was.

“Go to sleep!” I threw a pillow right at his face before turned my back on him and smiled secretly in the dark. I closed my eyes, pretending I was sleeping and his words kept repeating itself in my mind.

“You know how much I love you, right?”

 I wasn’t sure, but now I know.

“Aish! Don’t be so shy!” he shouted, hugging me from the back. Weird enough, I felt disgusted and yet, I didn’t even bother to push him away.

Donghae’s POV

I couldn’t control my feelings, seeing him happy again made me smiled to myself. I hugged him tighter, or you might say, squeezed him, and he slapped my hand lightly and said, “Not so tight, Hae. You’re hurting me,” and it made me loosened my grip.

“I love you, Lee Hyukjae.” I whispered and I could see him trying hard not to smile, acting like he didn’t like it although I knew he did.

That’s right.

Just try harder Lee Donghae, and his all yours.

If I keep on doing this,

I will definitely win the bet. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

yeahhh~~this chapter is quite long, but WHO CARES??I love long chapters~~^^