They should've been over.

But there were breakdowns, there were weddings to attend, there were parties to go to, there were other people that needed her attention. They should've been over and Jihyo knows that.

Jihyo doesn't know where the end begun and the numbness started, maybe it was the day she caught Sana between the sheets with someone else, or when she thought of getting revenge on Sana for doing that. Maybe it was all the other times they hurt each other but pretended to be the couple everyone wanted to be when in front of people in their lives.

She turns in bed and was met with the sleeping face of the woman she once loved but now loathed. underneath the sheets; with their limbs tangled with Sana sprawled across her chest.

She stopped counting how many times these moments have happened. Her mind was foggy as she tried to recount how it did, but she can’t. Just pieces; blurry, fast, and hot.

She only remembered how Sana’s thighs trembled with her hand between them, the slur of words Sana would yell while the woman tugged on her hair and drew her closer, the searing kisses they shared, and Sana drunkenly collapsing on top of her.

The sleeping woman stirred and turned her back to her. She kept racking her brain, but it was aching too much to think and even remember.

Jihyo got up gently trying her hardest to not wake Sana up. She went for her usual morning jog, trying to clear her head all while she needed to get her caffeine fix. She arrived at the coffee place and immediately the barista recognized her.

“Hey!” He called. “Your usual?”

“Hey, Daniel. Yeah, make that to go, also can you add a chai tea latte with an oatmeal cookie? Thanks.” She replied while going through her phone.

The photos like her memory are blurred, mishapen, and just all too vague. Pictures of Sana’s back, her pink hair, a close up of her amazing smile.

“You okay?” She hears Daniel ask.

“Huh? Oh, yeah. Just trying to fight this massive hang over. It really .” She gives him a small smile.

“Well, I hope you the best. Here’s your venti double shot espresso, three-quarters foam, brown sugar; and a hot chai tea latte with oatmeal cookie.”

She took her drinks and headed out the door, sipping on hers while she takes her walk back to her apartment.

When she arrives the bed is made and empty. Signs of Sana no where to be found. Well aside from the single note she found on the fridge door.

“Last night was great. See you soon, I guess? xx Sana”

That didn’t ruin her mood at all. Well she would never admit it did.

 

The next time it happened it was Irene’s bachelorette party, they went to a known bar with all the girls. Bottle service was free flowing, which means the drinks keep going and they just keep dancing.

Jihyo knows its bad to get drunk around Sana. Well its even worse to get drunk with an even drunker Sana.

She’s the touchy-feely kind, the invade-your-space kind of drunk. And to be honest Jihyo has been avoiding that.

So when Sana asked all of them to dance, Jihyo stayed back at the table. Her vision is kind of getting hazy and her feet sway a little more with every step, but her eyes never left Sana.

She went to the bar, asking for some water, while she looked back on the dance floor, Sana’s pink hair acting like a light house for Jihyo’s eyes to find. Surrounded with sweaty bodies, dudes with serious alcohol breath, and grabby hands.

She felt kind of at how Sana was dancing, but mostly pissed of on how Sana was dancing.

She got her water, and walked back to the table, she bumped into a guy. Effectively spilling her water all over the guy’s shirt.

Thank goodness it was just water.

“Oh God, I am so sorry.” She exclaimed while she grab tissues from her purse.

“Hey espresso girl, no big.” The guy said.

Jihyo looked up, and it was Daniel, her favorite barista.

“Oh my God, Daniel. Im sorry didn’t notice it was you.” She stammered.

“Told you its no big.” He smiled, his eyes twinkled in the flashing lights. “Here.” He said grabbing a tissue from Jihyo and writing his number down. “If you are that sorry then maybe coffee at some other place could make up for it.” And then left.

Jihyo nodded, tucking in the napkin in her purse. She looked out on the dance floor again and she caught Sana’s eye. If she was pissed off before then now she’s fuming.

 

Sana saw the whole thing from the dance floor, her girlfriend (well rather ex girlfriend but still girlfriend when they go out in public) flirting with some guy in the club.

She knows its wrong because one: they are just together for show and they have broken up months ago. Two: she could flirt with anybody too, She just doesn’t want to.

She caught Jihyo’s eyes as the guy left. She could feel Jihyo’s nose flare even from this distance, eyes trained on her like a hawk.

She didn’t really care about the guy behind her, as she ground her even more to his front, leaning on him and touching his neck. He was dancing with whats-his-face but this show is for the woman across the room and they both know it.

She could feel the from the guy behind him, his hands running up her thighs, his breath smelled like alcohol.

“Sana, Momo needs our help. She’s in the ladies room puking her guts out.” Jihyo said.

Sana nodded, and immediately went together with Jihyo to find Momo. But she was at home feeling too sick being taken cared of by Mina, and is definitely not here at Irene’s raging bachelorette party.

Jihyo’s grip was frim and tight; and Sana’s legs were like jell-o. She didn’t even know how many drinks she had before she got to this point, but it sure didn’t take much time. Jihyo tried door after door in the darkly lit club, Sana knows that she had to talk to Jihyo. This has gone on for quite some time after breaking up. Ending up in bed together after a party, a birthday bash, a friend getting dumped.

But they always end up in bed together, or in this case they end up in a storage closet in the back of a club.

Jihyo’s hands were quick, finding the hem of Sana’s short dress and pulling it up to her hips, exposing Sana to the cool air in the room.

It was dark but that didn’t stop Sana from seeing this almost hunger like look in Jihyo’s eyes.

Before she could even register what Jihyo was doing, Jihyo’s fingers were already two knuckles deep in her, working up a rhythm to get Sana to bliss.

The room was silent, as silent as you get in a club in the middle of the city, it was only the faint throb of the bass in the walls, still reverberating in Sana’s chest, along with her mewls of delight from the ministrations of the woman in front of her.

She comes undone, as Jihyo helps coax out the remaining waves of her . Jihyo completely pulls out and smiles.

She starts undoing Jihyo’s pants but Jihyo stopped her. “Some time later baby.”

Jihyo left the room so quickly it could’ve been comical as a dust cloud being left in her place.

Sana knows its bad to get drunk around Jihyo. And its even worse to get drunk around a jealous Jihyo.

It didn't happen for a few months, the celebrations stopped and they didn't feel the need to have anything to do with each other. Aside from Sana moving to the other room in their shared apartment; they barely see each other.

Jihyo has been texting and seeing Daniel during those months and it has been her most guarded secret. Mostly a secret from Sana.
So, it didn't happen for a few months.

Sana isn't dumb, and she is most especially isn't blind. The glow Jihyo has, her brighter smile, her lighter aura. Sana has seen that, she's been the cause of that, she's been the one making her smile when her phone beeps and vibrates.

But now, witnessing that on the other side of the apartment, while Jihyo laughs to her self with her eyes glued to her screen.

It . That's how Sana would describe it. Well that and a thousand more other words.

It happens again and Sana knows they should've been over way before, but again their friends know nothing and Jihyo is happy.

The game they're playing is dangerous and Sana knows it, but every time her excuses gets flimsier and flimsier.

They have so many reasons to celebrate, weddings to get to, parties to get drunk at, so when Jihyo showed up to said reasons with her new boyfriend, Sana knew they're really over.