He realised that it was uncharacteristic of him to impulsively invite the guys over to his place

when he in fact did not like to be the one to clean up everybody else's mess.

 

But the recent rumours of him leaving SM left a bitter taste on his tongue and this time around, he felt more then exhausted

of anti's trying to yet again poke their nose into his business and leaving snide comments on his bubble account. 

 

 He secretly needed his brothers around him as there seemed like no other better time , their schedules be damned. 

 

In true SJ style, he could hear them before they even arrived at his doorstep.

Heechul had given Leeteuk a spare key and with that, they let themselves in.

 

Hecchul silently counted down to his eardrums exploding with incessant chatter.

 

'Hyung,when did you paint your walls white?'

'Heechul Hyung, is this place meant to double up as a hospital?'

 

Donghae & Hyukjae chimmed at the same time which in turn cause the rest of group to break out in laughter.

 

He laughed aloud at their silly antics, where he'd already be smacking the back of their heads. 

He felt the weight in his chest ease a little, feeling happy to have them around.

 

'You brats!' he heard Leeteuk mock scold them before the man appeared in front of him. 

 

'Hi, my dearest chingu, don't worry about their them.'

'They made the same sort of snarky comments when they were over at my place some time back.'

He chimed as he wrapped his arms around Heechul and gave him a warm hug.

 

He was usually only clingy when he drank but he obliged Leeteuk nonetheless, happy to see him smile freely without reserve,

no forehead creases or tired eyes from worrying about the members never ending schedules,

or keeping their name and the members ever visible in the Elf's and public's eyes.

 

No one said that it'd be easy but they had continued climbing and eventually defied everyone's expectations on their way to the top.

 

But the reality was that they were getting older and as hard as they might try,

they did have to slow down at times as fatigue set in their bones and made them want to give up many times along the way.  

 

What kept them going ultimately, was the love that their own members and the Elf's gave,freely and without reserve.

Which in hindsight was not what was lacking at the moment. 

 

He had been too wrapped up in his own schedules and thoughts to take a breather at all,

and that in turn led to much inner turmoil as to why he still put himself through all this ,

when he ultimately had nothing to prove those naysayers.

The voice at the back of his mind was a different thing altogether though.

 

Through it all, He was glad that he still had them all. He never would have gotten through these 17 years without them

and their sometimes odd ways of showing their love and concern. 

 

He stood there, seemingly present but absent at the same time,lost in his own looping thoughts till he suddenly felt someone clasp his shoulders gently. 

He blinked his eyes a few times before realising that he had drifted off.

 

'Chul-ah, are you alright?' Leeteuk asked, firmly but quietly.

His eyes slowly drifted back to meet Leetuk's warm but concerned orbs. 

They both stood still, their gazes never wavering off each other.

 

When Heechul didn't reply him after a few minutes, his brows furrowed with worry and his grip tightened on his shoulders a little more then they should have.

He slowly guided Heechul to his bedroom that was a little down the hall and sat them both down on his bed. 

 

Thankfully , none of the other members had realised that the two eldest were suddenly missing in action.

At the very least,they would continue clowning around for some time on their own. 

 

Leeteuk massaged his temples for a few moments before turning to face Heechul, their hands clasping each others tightly.

 

'The last time this sort of thing happened was after our 'Battle of Incheon' .

Do you remember, Heechul-ah?' Teuk asked him gently so as not to startle him.

 

'Its not guilt this time Teuk, Heechul replied so softly that he might've missed it,had he not been by his side the last 17 years,

understanding more every other day how his same age friend thinks ,down to his mannerisms and little quirks.

 

'I have been able to cast aside all this negativity aside for the past 17 years and put it behind me.'

'Why did it hit me this hard all of a sudden? 'he mumbled.

I've always prided myself for being able to seperate my emotions easily,quicker then you could even attempt to do any sort of ageyo. 

 

Leeteuk chuckled softly, slightly relieved that Heechul still tried to use humor to ease the tension that filled the room. 

He didn't like seeing Heechul feeling so despondent, and so decided to try and make him feel better with whatever he could give .

 

'I don't mean to toot my own horn here.. Teuk started talking then paused, seeing that Heechul suddenly looked up at him with a frown.

 

'You aren't trying to make this about yourself are you? He questioned, his head tilted to the side, trying to gauge Leeteuk's intentions.

To his credit,Leeteuk didn't cringe nor shy away from Heechul.

 

He knew that he loved talking, regardless,if it was being an MC, or being a spokesperson of any sort, he craved the attention.