One night that Jung Taekwoon cannot forget. The affirmation of his real feelings concealed imperceptible to the one he always thought about. It was finally revealed, however clouded by alcohol impairing the decision making of the two close friends. But one thing Taekwoon knew for sure was that it wasn’t as impulsive as anyone who witnessed would consider it to be. It was thought about for a split second. Only now after realising his actions did he have the capability to question the effect this had on the current relationship of him and the close friend. Kim Minseok. 

 

They were both idols. From famous groups. Their relationship extended not just from exchanging polite greetings and glances when they bump into each other at gatherings but from their recent completion of the military service. Where a light of rekindled friendship flickered. And after Taekwoon, who became unbelievably timid and smitten, couldn’t hold his breath in to excitedly invite Minseok to his house when they were both coincidentally free one day. 

 

The setting for that night. One other friend with Minseok to join them as another person to admire, but in Taekwoon’s eyes he was the neutral mediator of his subconscious desire. That was all he needed to have a good time. 

 

Cooking his infamous rose pasta for both of them to taste; he particularly chose this dish especially for Minseok. Filled with overwhelming, blushing glee when the other complimented it. Observing him happily munch down on his food, overcome with a warm feeling he’d never felt before. Admiring such adoring features of his face up to his squishy cheeks, until Taekwoon realised the face he himself was making and so restored his composure. Turning around to continue eating and listening to the conversation. 

 

He always met with his friends at least once in a while when his schedule was clear. However, as the man sat there half engaged whilst half drifting off into his own thoughts, something occurred to him that he just couldn’t fathom. The warm feeling. It wouldn’t disappear, and would feel it spread all around him every time he glanced over at enthusiastic Minseok. Taekwoon suddenly addressed the two men by excusing himself to go get another bottle of the indulgent wine from his kitchen to remain out of their view. Maybe that would help, he naively thought as he slipped away. 

 

Although this proved difficult because away from the noise of the dining room table Taekwoon was able to feel and hear his heart pounding due to the warm feeling. Clutching to his heart, he glanced again at the back of Minseok unconsciously revealing a natural bright smile as he stared. 

 

Sighing, he knew he couldn’t hide from them for too long. In the kitchen. Despite his experience of hiding away for a long period of time. Taekwoon, portraying a warm smile, displayed the deluxe bottle on the table. As his eyes edged towards Minseok, who was smiling brightly back whilst holding his empty wine glass for the other to fill. Darting back and forth whilst he did so, as his heart began to flutter. But along with this, rose the pain and guilt of having such feelings towards his innocent friend. 

 

Prompting him to keep pouring the wine glass until he felt tipsy enough to forget the pain. Minseok and the other friend joined in the consistent drinking of wine, unaware of Taekwoon’s reason for doing so. After a while, the dining table was only surrounded by the two men, with Taekwoon’s other friend in the restroom. As the bottle that he once put out was finished, him and Minseok sat curled up on the chairs. In their own worlds. 

 

Taekwoon fell silent, completely gazing at him. And the more he stared the more he admired, whilst he did he unexpectedly spotted something on his face which caused him to snort and giggle out loud. 

 

Immediately, Minseok faced him and grinned back “what?” 

 

His eyes illuminating under the red mood light that Taekwoon had set up before hand for the evening. Ironic for the situation he was in. The other reached his hand out slowly to wipe the small speck of pasta sauce that was visible on Minseok’s cheek. Inadvertently, pulling his face closer to his own. 

 

How would someone react in a situation like this? It depends on the person. If they’re aggressive they would make a scene. But if they were like Minseok, they wouldn’t move away. Instead, his friend quietly edged closer. Shutting his eyes. 

 

Taekwoon nervously gulped, closing his eyes too. That moment he couldn’t feel the effects of being tipsy, only that same warm feeling enveloping him all night. His heart racing as he felt the tip of Minseok’s nose softly touch his own. And that was where he paused for that time being. Whilst panic and anxiety took over his mind. 

 

W-what?? What is happening?? 

 

In a state of confusion, he kept his eyes closed and gulped again. His palms becoming sweaty. As Minseok gently placed his hand his neck. Meanwhile, their forgotten about friend returned to see the two men in the position they were in. Hesitant to approach them as he felt indeed shocked. But nonetheless he sat down opposite them, with the realisation that they were both in the drunk state of mind. 

 

For Taekwoon, this wasn’t the case. He wasn’t responding in such a way plainly because of this. His heart was what kept him from pushing his close friend away from him and ignoring his true feelings. However, there was no indication that Minseok was reacting in the same way. Perhaps he was more drunk than he was. 

 

Observing the intimate behaviour, the friend sneakily took a picture of the two men. Eventually, causing Taekwoon to turn his head in reaction to the flash of the phone camera. 

 

“You guys are so cute.” He exclaimed, ignoring the other frowning at him. Showing the picture that he just took. And it really was cute, Taekwoon thought.

 

Minseok is cute…but surely we’re only like this because of the wine.. 

 

As the stars faded away behind the invisible clouds of the night sky, the time meant that Taekwoon was beginning to feel sleepy. In the room, there was only him and Minseok who was also beginning to feel the same way. Ever since the third friend conveniently left his house. 

 

Once again. He just couldn’t control himself. From gazing at his close friend feeling sentimental about the intimate moment they both just shared. It made the warm feeling return along with his nerves and guilt. Taekwoon leaned over to Minseok, who was resting his head on the table yawning. Tapping his shoulder as he wanted to keep him awake enough to show him the cute picture that was taken. 

 

“Hey Minseokie, look!” He whispered, the picture was sent to him via messages and so he showed it with a warm smile on his face. 

 

“Taekwoonie’s smile is so cute.” Minseok beamed back, leading to the other retracting his phone back in a panic at what he just said. 

 

Glancing at the picture, he didn’t realise the bright obvious smile he was showing in the picture. Even the thought of the intimate moment made him blush brightly replicated in the picture.

 

Unexpectedly, Minseok gently began to feel his tall, nervous friend’s face. Pulling him closer, similar to before. Taekwoon certainly felt similar as before. This time more perspiring from his forehead than usual. Both gazing into each other’s eyes so lovingly. His heart couldn’t take it anymore. His mind couldn’t function. 

 

The intimate moment returned. So came afterwards Taekwoon’s irresistible impulsive actions. He was bound to regret. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why aren’t you picking up the phone?

I hope I haven’t scared him away..

Minseok, where are you??

 

 

 

 

 

 

10am, following morning.

 

 

 

 

 

Suffering from effects of tiredness and an unbearable headache, Taekwoon sat at his dining table, which was left in the same state from the impulsive events of the night before, tapping his fingers on the table to the sound of the pulsing ringing from his phone. His attempts to contact him ending abruptly wit the sound of the robotic woman’s voice saying ‘the person you called is unavailable now, please try again later’. 

 

There might not even be a later. 

 

The frustrated man sighed to himself, yawning as he finally stood up from the untidy dining table. Picking up the spilt wine bottle, and as he did so he paused. The perpetual memory of last night. How many glasses of wine they both had. How he felt himself blushing nervously every time he turned to face him. His close friend, Minseok. As he reminisced, he felt his lips lightly. Clinging on to the vivid memory associated with it. Taekwoon groaned with his headache becoming worse every second. 

 

Hesitating, he shook his head and threw the bottle into the rubbish bag along with the rest of the mess. Taekwoon couldn’t help but acknowledge how ironic this was because Minseok was the cleanest person he knew. Admiring his qualities, his passion for work and his lovable nature. But what was realised during the spontaneity of his actions that night was that he didn’t admire him as a friend. Not even as a close friend he always claimed he was to him. And that was the reason for Taekwoon’s overwhelming feeling of shame and guilt along with the effects of his hangover. 

 

After repeatedly trying to call Minseok’s mobile receiving no response back, he sat back down on the couch rubbing his forehead in panic. His actions may have profoundly impacted his relationship with him. All he wanted was to talk with him about this, but when he woke up in the uncomfortable position his head was resting in on the table he was alone. Now he was overcome with the worry that Minseok was avoiding him. Frustrated with himself, Taekwoon clenched his fists and tried to think of where his friend could be and the alternative reason for him not answering. But when nothing could satisfy him, he came to the conclusion again that he scared him away. 

 

“Minseok..please answer..” He didn’t want to give up like his conscience was telling him to by calling his number one last time. However, his attempt went to waste. Sighing in despair, by chance he tried calling one of the members in a hope to at least draw their attention to his search. Only one member, fortunately, answered and immediately agreed to meet him. Because he was the only member who was aware of his dilemma. 

 

One that troubled him for an outstanding amount of time. The thoughts and desires that infested his subconscious for so long until that one day he struggled and a majority of its contents poured out. To the one member and friend he relied upon to shut his personal feelings and frustrations he would go through so he could continue with his life untainted. But he knew that this day would come. When he would fail to control his repressed urges; which called for desperate measures. 

 

“Wonshik, you’re here.” Taekwoon mumbled, letting the concerned other into his house awkwardly. 

 

“You called me.” His friend and credible producer Kim Wonshik replied back with a faint smile to oppose Taekwoon’s straight face painted with melancholy. 

 

“I-I..I don’t know where to begin. I need help.” He slowly sat back down on the couch, staring down at the floor overcome with his tiring headache. That caused him to curse and groan “!” 

 

Although, Taekwoon couldn’t help but feel hesitant to talk to him. In fact, as much as Wonshik would make light of the situation using humour techniques and jokes, he did wish he had chosen a more sympathetic member to unleash his unspoken feelings to. 

 

“Hey, Taekwoon you can’t call me every time you get hungover.” Wonshik grinned, ignorant of the tone of his voice as he continued to cheer him up with good intentions. “You don’t even drink soju, how on earth do you get this hungover just with wine? Lightweight.”

 

“The did you call me?” The other scowled back, reluctantly taking painkillers with water in order to reduce his physical pain. 

 

Observing him, his friend came to realisation that he was referring to a matter other than the hangover itself. Turning to face him, he changed to a serious tone “Taekwoon, what’s wrong?”

 

“Everything. I did something stupid last night.” A groaned response filled with anguish, which prompted his friend to cautiously check his forehead and proceed to go on his phone. 

 

Which revealed a picture of Taekwoon and his close friend Minseok on social media account. An intimate picture, drunken smiles and strong feelings. By seeing that, Wonshik got wind of what his elder was about to convey to him. He turned to face him “so you were with Minseok last night?” 

 

Ashamed, Taekwoon glanced back with a small serious nod. “Wonshik, I scared him away. I-I did something stupid.” 

 

“Ay you’re not stupid, well not completely.” He shrugged, smirking to himself but immediately wiped the expression from his face “what happened? You can tell me.” 

 

Exhaling deep breaths, his chest tightened. Since it was physically difficult for him to comprehend the actions of last night. Perhaps he was overthinking it. What he did wasn’t that bad was it? 

 

“Okay.” He looked Wonshik straight in the eye, his hands squirming whilst he took another deep breath. Ready to begin the story. “S-so you remember that I have a lot of friends.”

 

“I wouldn’t say you’ve got a lot-“ Wonshik commented but hesitated to finish the sentence due to the glare the other gave him in response. “Okay continue.” 

 

“We reconnected after being in the military together..we’re quite close.” Taekwoon added, however he felt the need to pause again to hold his nerve. 

 

One of his pet peeves was awkward moments, the trouble was that he was an awkward reserved person by nature. The silence whilst he began to fan himself as a result of feeling increasingly hot was exactly awkward. But this was one of the reasons why he got along well with Wonshik because they were polar opposites. His friend was the one to fill the awkward silences which made Taekwoon feel less uncomfortable than he would usually feel. It was just unfortunate that he would fill the silence with what he thought was nonsense spouts.

 

“Bro are you waiting for Christmas?” Wonshik impatiently scowled, once again taken aback by his hyung’s glaring eyes.

 

“Hey Ravi! Do you want to get hit?!” He hissed back raising his hand whilst the other began to object consistently. By Taekwoon calling him by his stage name, he knew that he had to stop teasing. 

 

“Hey, okay calm down.” Wonshik put his hand down flustered, and laid back on the couch with a sigh. 

 

“Sorry, I-I’m just frustrated..” the other sighed and with that he finally began to speak the truth that his friend had been waiting to hear. “We drank wine together last night. A lot.” 

 

“Well that explains it.” He rolled his eyes and felt Taekwoon’s head out of the blue “wait here.” 

 

“Yeah but-“ 

 

Abruptly, Wonshik got up and went to the kitchen opening the cupboards and moving everything around from their organised place to grab a glass. With ingredients he swiftly took from the fruit basket and the fridge, he began concocting something which he would regularly make to relieve the pain of feeling hungover whenever it occurred to him. 

 

Curious, Taekwoon leaned from the sofa to glance at what his friend was making in his own kitchen. Distracted by what he had been meaning to tell him since the beginning, which in turn helped him settle down his frustration.

 

Eventually, as he was waiting, Wonshik entered the living room with a proud grin on his face as he held out the glass to Taekwoon who took it with scepticism. The drink was a pinkish colour that he was unfamiliar with, almost resembling the colour of strawberry milkshake. However, when he put it close to his nose the whiff of it made him shudder. Smelling it again, Taekwoon retched and shoved it on the coffee table. 

 

“What the did you make me?” He cursed, as he tried to get up but his friend forced him to sit back down and hold the glass again. 

 

“I know it’s bad but it does the trick.” Wonshik kept on grinning and provoking him to take one big gulp of the distasteful drink with the rotten stench once again making the other retch at the sight of it. “Man you have a bad gag reflex.” 

 

“I swear to god.” Taekwoon muttered under his breath, as he held his nose and managed the one swallow of the horrible bitter drink. As he did so, his friend burst out sniggering and held his phone out. “Wonshik what the is in this drink??” He screeched, grimacing after he quickly put the drink down. 

 

“It’s raspberries, coffee and fish paste.” Wonshik snorted, whilst he was holding his phone out recording his agitated friend’s reaction. Exclaiming in disgust, he ran to the kitchen to gulp down large amounts of tap water. Until he realised what Wonshik had just down to him, overhearing his outbursts of laughter. 

 

Frowning, he entered back in the room clenching his fists as he sat back down on the sofa. His exasperated expression caused his friend to quieten down his laughing and smirk “I can’t believe you fell for that.”

 

“I hate you.” Taekwoon growled back, hitting his arm until Wonshik grabbed his hand and held it so that he couldn’t move it further. 

 

Sulking, Taekwoon let go and sighed. Although, this actual event made him forget about his hangover. But nothing could make him forget about what he went through that night. The sole reason he called Wonshik over was so he could confide in him and get advice, but also so he would cheer him up. Which he magically did with the ridiculous prank. And with the surprise present. 

 

“Aww okay sulky Taekwoonie, here.” Wonshik beamed, he undid the expensive watch he was currently wearing on his wrist and handed it over. “You can wear it.”

 

Just seeing the shiny expensive watch made his frown fade away and he excitedly snatched it from him and wore it. “You know me too well. But I’m still mad at you.” He chuckled, glancing at the new watch he had on his wrist. One accessory he admired the most. 

 

“So what else were you saying about yesterday?” Wonshik suddenly asked, prompting the other to stop looking at his watch and sigh. 

 

Taekwoon had to pluck up the courage to express himself to his friend. “I can’t ignore it anymore.” Shaking his head, his smile faded and he stared back “Me and Minseok..that night..” pausing because he felt the intimidating eyes of Wonshik anticipating his story. 

 

In response, he sighed and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder “Taekwoon-“ but at that exact moment he was interrupted. 

 

“I kissed Minseok.” Nervously staring up at Wonshik who retracted his hand and stared back. No sudden reaction. Before the atmosphere between them would transcend into awkwardness, Taekwoon waved his hand in front of his unmoved face. “Wonshik?” 

 

Fortunately, Wonshik reacted, in a way that the other did not expect. Slowly portraying a suggestive grin which turned into an uncontrollable burst of sniggering. Once again grabbing Taekwoon’s hand, continuing to laugh at his bewildered expression at his initial reaction. 

 

“Are you serious?” Wonshik giggled, standing up whilst holding his hand enthusiastically. 

Taekwoon nodded, still slightly confused. His friend ruffled his head and patted it, his warm smile causing him to blush red. “That’s all you wanted to tell me?” 

 

“W-what do you mean?” The other questioned in amazement, because he genuinely expected his friend to act surprised. Shocked even. 

 

“It’s not a big deal Taekwoon, it’s fine.” Wonshik shrugged, he moved away towards the door attempting to leave. However, he was stopped and dragged away by Taekwoon who couldn’t get his head round what he was hearing. 

 

“What do you mean it’s not a big deal?? It’s Kim Minseok a-and I’m the one who did this Wonshik!” Taekwoon shrieked, shaking the others arm in frustration. 

 

A reason why the idol was so panicked by the reaction of the other member was because he knew he wasn’t taking it seriously. In contrast, Taekwoon was a serious person and so he indeed thought this was a serious matter. For him it was a massive deal. 

 

Scratching his head, he let go of Wonshik’s arm and strayed away near to the dining table. To the seat where Minseok was sitting where he committed the impulsive action. Flashbacks of that moment entered his mind and refused to leave. Inadvertently causing his heart to beat faster; clutching onto his chest as he imagined the moment Minseok’s lips softly brushing his own. The goosebumps returning. It was just to unbelievable for Taekwoon to fathom that it took place. And he liked to believe that his feelings he expressed wasn’t one sided, as much as he thought it was. Because of the wine. 

 

“Okay, so you were both drunk last night and kissed?” Wonshik clarified in the way that sounded so simple to the other. But it wasn’t the case. 

 

It was far too complicated in Taekwoon’s mind to comprehend, so he approached him shaking his head “I wasn’t that drunk... I understood everything. I knew clearly what I was doing.” 

 

Dumbfounded, Wonshik paused and decided to ponder on everything he had just said up to that moment. Doing so, he went back to the sofa and leaned back as he sat on it. “So you meant to kiss him?” He suddenly asked after minutes of silence. “Like..you wanted to?” 

 

Feeling overwhelmingly embarrassed, Taekwoon avoided eye contact awkwardly and soon started to suffer hot flushes. He began to fan himself and covered his face, which he would usually do whenever he felt awkward. Even though Wonshik was the person he shared most things with he couldn’t help but feel nervous about sharing such personal things with him. It took him longer than usual but in the end he would get there. 

 

As Taekwoon began to calm down, he sat next to Wonshik again first of avoiding eye contact. Meanwhile, his friend observed his behaviour acknowledging and sympathising with the struggle he must’ve been going through internally. Wrapping his arm around his back, he smiled “Taekwoon, it’s okay. There’s nothing to be afraid of.” 

 

“But Wonshik, I’ve scared him away. I-I’ve been keeping it to myself for so long and yesterday I just couldn’t hold it in any longer.” He sighed anxiously.

 

He wanted to help his desperate friend anyway he could, because he wasn’t just a friend he was his older brother. Pondering to himself, Wonshik further asked him “okay so you both kissed..then what happened?” 

 

“I can’t recall…the last thing I remember is waking up and seeing that Minseok wasn’t sitting next to me anymore. He obviously freaked out and left, I-I’ve been trying to call him but there’s no answer.” 

 

Taekwoon grabbed his phone from the table since it had been an hour since he had last called Minseok, however, unlocking his phone he discovered that the one he desired to talk to had rang him back. Once. But the place he hadn’t checked was his messages. 

 

Anxiously opening the messages, he read Minseok’s one sentence text and exclaimed loudly “hey!!”

 

“What?” Wonshik questioned, attempting to read from his phone but he turned round too quickly.

 

“He said his performance is back on today! It was supposed to be cancelled but it’s back on!” Taekwoon screeched, and after let out a sigh of relief. He wasn’t being avoided on purpose. 

 

“What are you going to do then?” 

 

However, Taekwoon didn’t know for sure if he even wanted to talk to him. He didn’t want it to be a thing of past or water under the bridge. It was complicated. “I don’t know.” He replied back, still staring at the message on his phone.  He shook his head frequently “I-I want to go to him..b-but..I don’t know.”

 

“You like Minseok don’t you?” Wonshik asked him quietly, noticing that he was becoming all flustered and sweaty again so he handed tissues. Timidly, he nodded to his reply, allowing his friend to smile sincerely back “then there’s your answer.” 

 

“B-but-“ as Taekwoon attempted to protest back with a negative, his friend interrupted. 

 

“Taekwoon, I know you wanted to ignore every feeling you’ve had up till now but I can’t let you keep torturing yourself. You’re both idols but what does that matter? What matters more is you, your health and your honest feelings. Sometimes I may worry. But I will always be here for you.” Wonshik reassured, giving his nervous hyung and a warm hug. 

 

“Thank you Wonshik.” Taekwoon responded with his soft voice, patting him on the back as he let go of the hug. The reassurance was what he had longed for. Although he was still full of doubt, he knew what he had to do. 

 

Hastily, him and Wonshik left the house and so after greeting him away he travelled in his own car to the Seoul performing arts theatre. Feeling increasingly nervous which added to his perspiration as he was driving. Meanwhile at the same time he began to contemplate on where his feelings for Minseok stemmed from. 

 

When he met his nephew Minyool for the first time. That day it was shining brightly so he went with his sister and his adorable nephew to the playground. Whilst he was holding him and taking care of him, he invited Minseok to join so that after they could both go and eat together. 

 

Taekwoon remembered the exact moment his heart fluttered for him. Minseok’s comforting bright smile, the way his eyes lit up when he saw Minyool sitting happily in his arms. He observed his friend actively playing and talking sweetly to his nephew. And that was when he realised that he couldn’t stop watching him. Adoring him. Minseok was the someone who he had been looking for that whole time. 

 

Ever since, whenever they would meet up, Taekwoon couldn’t control the permeating warm sensation. Struggling to keep it all to himself, hence the reason he would go to Wonshik every time he felt like he was losing hope. And once the loving feelings came, the pain in his heart returned. The pain increased each time he forced himself into repressing his true feelings. It was a torturous cycle. Falling for Minseok and wanting to pursue such feelings that were instead blocked by fear, ultimately leading to the emotional pain he would feel. 

 

But Taekwoon intended to end that cycle. At first caring about the consequences of the likelihood of ending up heartbroken. Now he decided he couldn’t hold it in any longer, he tried to ignore his doubting thoughts.

 

If he rejects me..what will I do? 

 

A part of me doesn’t want to jeopardise this relationship but at the same time I have to do this. 

 

Arriving at the theatre where the posters of Minseok’s chilling musical Hadestown captured the eyes of every person who would walk past. It was the same theatre Taekwoon himself had performed at before. However, his nerves weren’t settled. 

 

Entering in, he heard the applause from the audience who had silently been engaging the whole time with storytelling of the musical. A standing ovation, as it had just gone past 2pm and Minseok’s performance of the day was nearly over. 

 

Initially, he planned to wait for him outside to talk after the show although, until after being spotted by the backstage staff who recommend the musical actor, he was allowed backstage and so intended to wait for him outside his dressing room. 

 

He heard the applause subside after a while and nervously prepared himself to see Orpheus (the character Minseok was playing) hurry down the steps of the stage. With the adorable heartwarming smile he would always have.

 

Soon it became totally silent, just as the main actors came off stage to go change. As he waited to see Minseok hop excitedly after another successful show. But he didn’t return along with his colleagues, which painted an anxious expression on his face. 

 

“Oh, Taekwoon!” An familiar voice called him from far, he knew who it was and was relieved that someone acknowledged his existence there. It wasn’t Minseok but his close colleague who greeted him last time Taekwoon watched the musical Hadestown. “You’re looking for Minseok right?” 

 

“Oh, how did you know?” Taekwoon smiled politely back, glancing over the actor’s shoulder in case he was behind.

 

“He’s waiting for you on stage.” The other grinned. 

 

Confused, Taekwoon timidly pointed at himself “f-for me?” whilst the actor friend confirmed he greeted him back before leaving to backstage. Timidly bowing in respect back, he stared up at the darkness of the stage. 

 

Waiting for me?

 

Anxiously, Taekwoon stepped up the familiar stairs onto the stage he was used to performing on. There only one stage light was on. Silent because the audience had dispersed quickly. Only the sound of the boards creaking could be heard, as he slowly stepped forward. Towards the one spotlight shining centre stage. At that moment in time, Taekwoon suddenly paused. Because he saw the dark figure opposite him move. Gradually towards the spotlight where he saw him. The one who he had been waiting for. The bubbly personality he missed. That bright smile that comforted him. Minseok revealed himself in the spotlight; his cheeks blushing bright red. And he did it again. He made his heart flutter. 

 

Except this time, there would be no pain to accompany it.

 

“I didn’t think you would come.” Minseok began, glancing up at his tall friend feeling bashful.

 

“I came..because I wanted to say-“ However, Taekwoon abruptly paused, because the other had raised his hands in attempt to interrupt. 

 

“Wait! I have something to say first.” He exhaled nervously before stepping forwards closer towards him. Scratching timidly behind his ear, the response similarly to Taekwoon’s whenever he felt overwhelmed. He suddenly bowed his head down as to apologise “I-I’m sorry Taekwoon.” 

 

Bewildered as to how to respond, Taekwoon stayed silent. Whilst in his mind, he began to question in a panic the reason he would be apologising. But by him staying silent, he allowed Minseok to continue “I didn’t mean to seem like I was avoiding you. I thought..you wouldn’t want to see me after..embarrassing you. I’m sorry.” 

 

Is he talking about..the kiss? 

 

“Oh.” Taekwoon muttered back, with mixed emotions as to how to respond. His heart beginning to ache and deep down he couldn’t hide his disappointment. 

 

In fact, Minseok noticed the miserable expression he was making. Edging closer to him, he reached his hand out to softly touch his cheek. Causing Taekwoon to react and glance at him so that they were gazing intently into each other’s eyes. The urge to explode everything out to him increased. 

 

“Taekwoon, I’m sorry. I-I should’ve told you everything..before I initiated the kiss.” Minseok calmly explained, causing the other to react in confusion. He let go off his cheek and smiled feebly back. 

 

“Minseok what do you mean?” He questioned back quietly. Feeling his pulse best faster, clenching his fists to prepare for what was to come. 

 

Hesitantly, Minseok shook his head and then after letting out a sigh he stared at him in a serious manner. But he was still full of nerves and began to stutter once he spoke “I should’ve told you that I liked you. B-but I was tipsy and b-before I knew it I was kissing you and I couldn’t stop.” 

 

“Huh?? What did you just say??” Taekwoon immediately questioned, after hearing the first sentence. Gulping anxiously, he waited for the other to respond. 

 

“I like you, Taekwoonie.” Minseok confessed, blushing as he courageously did so. But his serious expression didn’t last for long, as he glanced at Taekwoon he witnessed the huge exuberant smile. That made his worries seem so small. 

 

Both cheeks tinting red, giggling to themselves because of this. Taekwoon let out the biggest sigh of relief, as if the weight of all of the guilt and fear built up inside of him had just dissipated from him. Chuckling, he took hold of Minseok’s hands and slid them round his waist. Pulling him into a warm hug. One he had been wanting for so long. 

 

“I like you too Minseokie. So much.” He beamed, emotional but happy.

 

That was the warm feeling. It was the best feeling he had hugging the one he desired for too long. Taekwoon, after a moment, faced him. His eyes glistening in the spotlight. Minseok giggled since he spotted the tears forming in his eyes “are you crying?” He teased, poking his cheeks in response.

 

Sniffling, he chuckled back and shook his head. It was his chance to take initiative. Before he knew it, his hand began to caress Minseok’s cheek gently. “I’m happy.” He whispered, becoming closer to his face. Do that their noses touched softly. Resembling the position they were in that night. 

 

Except this time they weren’t tipsy. Slowly, his eyes closed leaning his head forward. To gently brush Minseok’s lips. Utter silence. Only the sound of Taekwoon’s beating heart could be heard. As the soft brushes altered to passionate kisses, his hand that was once caressing his cheek travelled upwards to his luscious hair. While Minseok’s lightly held the waist. The spotlight shining over the two men infatuated with each other. 

 

With this kiss, there was nothing to regret. Planting one final soft kiss; they both returned to the Eskimo nose kisses, feeling extremely shy. Taekwoon couldn’t stop smiling, absolutely smitten by Minseok’s bright beaming smile too. 

 

After, Taekwoon stepped back and held out his hand for him to take hold of. “Are you hungry?” He asked, grinning. And when he nodded back, they both happily left the stage hand in hand. Minseok finally changed out of his characters outfit so that they could both eat out together. 

 

“You know I was going to tell you first..before you told me. I was so nervous. If it wasn’t for Wonshik I would’ve not said anything.” Taekwoon chuckled, as he turned the meat over the grill at the Korean restaurant him and Minseok chose to eat at. 

 

“Really?? I went through the same thing and I told Jongin everything.” Minseok grinned back, eating the cooked meat with the rice. And as he was doing so, Taekwoon admired him with the brightest smile he couldn’t resist. 

 

That one night confirmed not only Taekwoon’s feelings but Minseok’s too. Both hid their feelings in their own way, and at times went through difficult hardships when they just felt like giving up. But what kept them together this whole time was not only the support they received from their close friends, but their true feelings.

 

Taekwoon felt satisfied. He felt free, released from the torturous cycle. Free from the fictional portrayal of himself he had to keep his feelings hidden. He had only wished he had told Minseok sooner. He only wished he had confided in Wonshik sooner. Because now he could be himself. And be happy, with his new adorable boyfriend.