AUTHOR'S NOTE:

THIS IS THE DENIAL STAGE 

USING MASCULINE PRONOUNS AND THEY/THEM PRONOUNS

Laying in the grass

it gave him a sense of liberation when he touched it.

it began to pour, furiously.

He stood up crying, shaking his head.

He was tired of going in circles, but he wasn't giving up.

as much as he wants to believe it,  it would shatter his illusion.

He wants to be in that circle forever but he's slowly going out of pace.

He dwells in her delusion, refusing others to help, he wants to be in his fantasy forever.

Yet, He lives in the real world, they are tired of everything and everyone. He only wants to lay in the grass, forgetting everything.

He is dazed, upset, worried, shaking her head; he doesn't want it to be real. He wants the rain to stop but He isn't even stopping himself from running in circles.

But now he breaks from running in circles and enters a stage in his life that his illusion will never be real, he still dwells in his illusion. he's running away.

Running away from the circles, his mind is going blank but he's still in his delusion, wanting and praying it to be real but it will never be real. He picks up pace and runs even faster, holding his breath. 

He stops abruptly and looks around him, the rain isn't stopping nor is he, sobbing will be his forever friend and companion in this race.

The race that doesn't have a winner but only a loser, he's soaked from the rain but he doesn't care, he's trying to grasp what's left in himself to believe that his delusion is real. Still refusing to believe what's around him, he stops once more and screams in the void while doing so, he lays down on the wet grass; wailing what he feels. 

He doesn't want to let go of the grass that he was laying on because he wants it to be real. 

"Please for the love of God, be real.. I'm begging you to be real, let me stay here" he said with gusto.

The wind had other plans, the wind was listening to him, the wind was NOT his friend, the wind speaks the truth. 

The wind may not be his friend but the wind has sympathy and they think he needs it so the wind whispered in his ears softly and gently.

"It will NEVER be real"  then he slowly calms himself down, and looks around the colors that he failed to noticed when he was laying on the grass. Wiping his tears, still not believing the wind.

"But i want it to be real.. i want to be happy, i'm not hurting anyone, am i?" he whispered back to the wind. 

"You aren't hurting anyone? YOU'RE HURTING YOURSELF WITH THIS DELUSION OF YOURS" with that the wind had enough of his lies.

The wind knows who lies, they can see them through the person. the wind harshly blows he up and encouraging him to fly up, he starts to panic and he pleads to the wind not to carry him, but the wind has other plans for him. Sunghoon, the wind wants to help him realize that what he is doing is wrong.